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    1. Have you had a life-altering change in who you are?

      The kinds of change I'm referring to are hard to put into words. A few examples may be switching from one end of the political spectrum to the other, leaving one country or culture for another,...

      The kinds of change I'm referring to are hard to put into words. A few examples may be switching from one end of the political spectrum to the other, leaving one country or culture for another, religious conversions and deconversions, or leaving behind one's family. Often, these changes are caused by deeply personal events like receiving a serious medical diagnosis, conflict, the death of a loved one, midlife crisis, or merely examining one's values or beliefs. There are countless other examples of both changes and causes, many of which I've never considered.

      There is shared experience between these changes: the world hasn't changed, but somehow everything is different. Everything is in a completely new light; it's as if you've moved between parallel universes. Not everyone has had or will have such a moment, but these changes seem to be the most important in catalyzing who we are. As much as we think sharing opinionated memes or arguing at Thanksgiving is going to shape or mold people around us, it is often personal experiences that actually make such change possible. And some small number of people do experience profound change: racists become antifascists, liberals become stanch conservatives, Christians become atheists. These sorts of life-altering changes are often what tell us most about who a person is.

      I made this post because the discussion of these changes are among the most valuable discussions I've had with others, and people often don't get socially-acceptable opportunities to share something so personally important to them. This is potentially a heavy subject, so don't feel that you need to share or elaborate any further than what's comfortable for you.

      37 votes
    2. Folding bike recommendations

      Hi Tilderinos! I am doing a study abroad program in Bordeaux, France. I am considering buying myself a folding bike for my time there. I just started doing some online research, and Brompton,...

      Hi Tilderinos! I am doing a study abroad program in Bordeaux, France. I am considering buying myself a folding bike for my time there. I just started doing some online research, and Brompton, Tern, and Dahon have popped up so far. The Brompton bikes are a bit more than I really want to spend, but I could spend that much if it was worth it. Do you have any recommendations on brands, models, or things to look for? Thanks!

      6 votes
    3. Asking neighbors to turn down noise

      I am posting to get your opinions on something that happened tonight. Music started blasting from my neighbor’s place at 12-ish with some people screaming. Our corridor has a WhatsApp group and I...

      I am posting to get your opinions on something that happened tonight.

      Music started blasting from my neighbor’s place at 12-ish with some people screaming. Our corridor has a WhatsApp group and I wasn’t 100% sure which neighbor it is so I messaged there at around 12:30am.

      I chose my words to be as polite as possible… dunno if it was polite enough. Something like: hey to the people who are having the party, have fun but please adapt the noise accordingly with the time with a thanks emoji.

      They replied apologetically and added that it was their birthday. Didn’t feel like it was being used as an excuse but more an explanation.

      Thinking maybe I should have let it slide regardless of whether it was their birthday or not but I did wake up exceptionally early this morning and needed some sleep after a hard day’s work.

      Am I being too anal about it? How would you handle such a situation with noise?

      13 votes
    4. Anyone here suffering from low testosterone?

      I am 37yo. One year ago I did a checkup and asked for my testosterone levels because I was feeling my libido was lower than normal. The results came back and my numbers were 377 ng/dL, free test...

      I am 37yo.

      One year ago I did a checkup and asked for my testosterone levels because I was feeling my libido was lower than normal.

      The results came back and my numbers were 377 ng/dL, free test was 9 ng/dL and SHBG 23,6 mmol/L.

      It was low, but within the normal range.

      Everything else was perfectly normal.

      Now almost a year later I am feeling that things are worse. I can go a week without feeling any desire. I still have morning wood, but it is not every day like it was. I have sex with my SO, but I can easily lose my erection.

      I scheduled an appointment with an endocrinologist from my health inssurance, but it has a spot only in July!

      So I went to a lab and did a blood test for testosterone and it is indeed worse.

      It is now 255 ng/dL, free test was 6,5 ng/dL and SHBG 19 mmol/L.

      I am physically active, lift weights 4 days per week, can squat relatively big numbers, am not overweight (on mornings I have a six pack) and drink alcohol only on weekends.

      Is this drop normal when you reach 40s or there is probably an issue here?

      I thought HRT was for when we were in our 50s.

      Anybody has gone through anything similar and can share your stories?

      14 votes
    5. What is it like to have both ADHD and autism?

      I've been doing a lot of work with my therapist and it has been suggested that I might have a mix of both Autism and ADHD. I have always related to Autism to a certain extent but I would never say...

      I've been doing a lot of work with my therapist and it has been suggested that I might have a mix of both Autism and ADHD.

      I have always related to Autism to a certain extent but I would never say it because I felt like I didn't really fit because some things I do don't make sense it that context. I was also obsessed with learning to be human since young and have a lot of systems to deal with it and apparently that means I've been masking for a very long time.

      But my therapist also brought up ADHD and that has explained a lot about some the things I'm still currently struggling with. But again, when I look it up, I don't feel like I fully fit. But also, I have developed a lot of systems over the years to deal with my issues and function like a normal human being. So a lot of the things I struggle with is hidden because I've "fixed" them.

      I'm still reluctant to say I have either of those two things because I feel like an imposter. So I've just settled on Neurodivergent and think that I can always learn the tools that help people with ADHD even if I don't have it. Because if the tools work for you, then why not?

      But my therapist has suggested getting diagnosed because it does change what kind of medication you might get. I'm currently on medication for anxiety and depression.

      So now I'm wondering how common it is to have a mix of both ADHD and Autism. For those who have both, what is it like for you? What is your daily life like? What are your struggles and how do you deal with them? When did you realise you might have a mix of both? How do you feel about yourself and your brain?

      I apologize if this isn't the right place to ask this. I don't post very often and am getting used to it.

      37 votes
    6. Where is the best place to find freelance UX/UI designers?

      Historically companies I've been at have had someone on staff, but we're a small startup and looking to get some UX/UI support. All of my googling has lead me to "gig" websites like Upwork or...

      Historically companies I've been at have had someone on staff, but we're a small startup and looking to get some UX/UI support. All of my googling has lead me to "gig" websites like Upwork or Fiver and talking to friends in industry (granted salaried UX/UI folks) have lead me to Linkedin or Indeed. Neither feels like the right place for what we're looking for. Does anyone have an suggestions for finding freelance designers we could work with iteratively? Thanks!

      Context: Our company is rolling our a new platform out to beta users and are looking to refine some of our platform's interface. Mainly we're hoping to polish up some of the more amateur design elements across the platform and get help designing layout for tools/data presentation. We have done a good amount customer research on what folks are looking for, will be getting active feedback after pushing the changes, and are hoping to iterate with said feedback.

      9 votes
    7. New Music Fridays: Pearl Jam, Cloud Nothings, Melvins, and more

      Albums typically release on Fridays. This is a thread to discuss week of April 19, 2024 releases that have recently arrived on our doorstep, or been announced for the future. Feel free to share...

      Albums typically release on Fridays. This is a thread to discuss week of April 19, 2024 releases that have recently arrived on our doorstep, or been announced for the future. Feel free to share albums, singles, EPs or reissues that have caught your eye and interest, or share your thoughts about any new music that you've had the chance to listen to this week.

      Discussion Points
      Is there anything you've been looking forward to listening to?
      Any releases that have surprised you?
      Have you listened to any new music recently? What are your thoughts?
      What have you enjoyed from these artists in the past? How does their latest work compare?

      Links:
      Pitchfork - Out This Week
      AllMusic - All New Releases
      Stereogum - New Music
      Shreddit Release Tracker
      New Metal and Hardcore Releases - Lambgoat
      Heavy Metal Album Release Calendar - Heavy Music HQ
      Upcoming albums - Encyclopaedia Metallum: The Metal Archives


      I'll have my list later, but wanted to get the topic up now. For the title, just chose a few I quickly saw on lists.


      Thoughts: should we narrow this topic to only new releases/announcements from the week it's for (in this case, this week)? I feel like right now there's some overlap between this and the "what are you listening to this week" topics, but I think they can each exist with their own goals.

      3 votes
    8. TV Tuesdays Free Talk

      Warning: this post may contain spoilers

      Have you watched any TV shows recently you want to discuss? Any shows you want to recommend or are hyped about? Feel free to discuss anything here.

      Please just try to provide fair warning of spoilers if you can.

      12 votes
    9. What actually-useful questions should someone ask when hiring a cybersecurity professional?

      Imagine you’re the manager hiring someone for a technical cybersecurity job. What non-obvious questions help you judge the candidate’s skill/suitability? What makes those questions useful? That...

      Imagine you’re the manager hiring someone for a technical cybersecurity job. What non-obvious questions help you judge the candidate’s skill/suitability? What makes those questions useful?

      That is, assume you’ve done the standard complement of job interview questions such as background and tool familiarity. I’m looking for stuff specific to some part of cybersecurity. It’s okay to get specific to your part of the field.

      21 votes
    10. Save Point: A game deal roundup for the week of April 14

      Add awesome game deals to this topic as they come up over the course of the week! Alternately, ask about a given game deal if you want the community’s opinions: e.g. “What games from this bundle...

      Add awesome game deals to this topic as they come up over the course of the week!

      Alternately, ask about a given game deal if you want the community’s opinions: e.g. “What games from this bundle are most worth my attention?”

      Rules:

      • No grey market sales
      • No affiliate links

      If posting a sale, it is strongly encouraged that you share why you think the available game/games are worthwhile.


      All previous Save Point topics

      If you don’t want to see threads in this series, add save point to your personal tag filters.

      11 votes
    11. I just switched to an iPhone, what should I do to make the most of this change?

      Basically the title. I've been an Android user since 2012, but have have an iPad and a Macbook that I really like, especially how well they work together. My pixel 5 was on its way out, so I...

      Basically the title. I've been an Android user since 2012, but have have an iPad and a Macbook that I really like, especially how well they work together. My pixel 5 was on its way out, so I finally took the plunge and bought an iPhone 15 Pro earlier this week. I'm still getting everything set up, and I'm particularly excited to play with the different focus modes and shortcuts. I'm curious what apps and features should I be using to make the most of this switch?

      27 votes
    12. Weekly US politics news and updates thread - week of April 15

      This thread is posted weekly - please try to post all relevant US political content in here, such as news, updates, opinion articles, etc. Extremely significant events may warrant a separate...

      This thread is posted weekly - please try to post all relevant US political content in here, such as news, updates, opinion articles, etc. Extremely significant events may warrant a separate topic, but almost all should be posted in here.

      This is an inherently political thread; please try to avoid antagonistic arguments and bickering matches. Comment threads that devolve into unproductive arguments may be removed so that the overall topic is able to continue.

      5 votes
    13. Offbeat Fridays – The thread where offbeat headlines become front page news

      Tildes is a very serious site, where we discuss very serious matters like united nations, embezzlement and roguelites. Tags culled from the highest voted topics from the last seven days, if anyone...

      Tildes is a very serious site, where we discuss very serious matters like united nations, embezzlement and roguelites. Tags culled from the highest voted topics from the last seven days, if anyone was mystified.

      But one of my favourite tags happens to be offbeat! Taking its original inspiration from Sir Nils Olav III, this thread is looking for any far-fetched offbeat stories lurking in the newspapers. It may not deserve its own post, but it deserves a wider audience!

      5 votes
    14. Zacklabe: a site for great up-to-date visualizations regarding climate change, especially about Arctic and Antarctic

      Zacklabe is a site, created by the climate scientist and National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration researcher, Zachary Labe, that has many great visualizations of data regarding climate...

      Zacklabe is a site, created by the climate scientist and National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration researcher, Zachary Labe, that has many great visualizations of data regarding climate change, especially about the Arctic and Antarctic. It gathers its data from scientific observations, which are cited. You can access the visualizations following this link. Here are the visualizations, with many graphics for each entry.

      Arctic Climate Seasonality and Variability
      Arctic Sea Ice Extent and Concentration
      Arctic Sea Ice Volume and Thickness
      Arctic Temperatures
      Antarctic Sea Ice Extent and Concentration
      Climate Change Indicators
      Climate model projections compared to observations in the Arctic
      Global Sea Ice Extent and Concentration
      Polar Climate Change Figures

      Note: I briefly created a similar topic, but it was only about a single link from here. I deleted because I realized it's much better to create a thread about the site in general.

      6 votes
    15. What did you do this week (and weekend)?

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do...

      As part of a weekly series, these topics are a place for users to casually discuss the things they did — or didn't do — during their week. Did you accomplish any goals? Suffer a failure? Do nothing at all? Tell us about it!

      5 votes