The Holidays by the end of the year are a time for meeting a lot of family members that we may not have seen for a long time. For a lot of people, this a joyful moment of relaxation where they can enjoy the company of those they love. For others, this can also be a stressful period, when tensions, trauma, and insecurities related to family relationships emerge, often in unexpected ways. Different people experience those events in vastly different ways.

Are you more of an introvert or an extrovert?

What does Christmas (as well as other events with a component of "forced" social gathering) mean to you?

How did you manage it this year?

Is this usually a happy time for you? Why?

I miss the magic of Christmas. Today and tonight feels ordinary to me, and I miss that sense of wonder.

I miss the trips my family would take to visit our relatives. I miss the get-togethers, and the feasting, and playing games with my cousins and the family friends.

Even though I'm an atheist now, I miss having to go to midnight mass. I miss the excitement of being able to open one present before going to bed.

Unless some tragedy befalls me, I'm sure I can recapture that magic in my future. I'm not depressed about it. But that's a hope for later. For now, this is it.

For everybody else out there who's having a so-so Christmas... wishing you all the best, and hope you can still find a moment to appreciate the holiday.

Normally in the evenings I have to myself, I keep busy and find satisfaction in coding, or writing, or gaming. Tonight, those things don't feel meaningful.

I just wish I had somebody special to share Christmas Eve with, like in all those cozy Christmas songs. Instead, I'm just tired and want to sleep... But I can't go to bed until me and my mom can get my dad changed, so he's not wet with urine the whole night. Just like last night, and the night before that, and the night before that.

I wish I could have gotten to know my dad as well as I've gotten to know my mom, as an adult instead of as a child. But I also would have never spent this much time with my mom if my dad didn't end up with PCA, so wishing for that is wishing for an impossibility.

Why are people setting off fireworks in my area, starting at midnight? It's already 2:00 AM. It's Christmas Eve, not New Years. Aren't kids supposed to be asleep for Santa Claus to drop off presents? Do kids still believe in Santa Claus, or do they just stay up late playing video games on Christmas Eve now?

Maybe they aren't fireworks, maybe they're shooting at Santa.

I've been hearing some ambulance sirens. My dog is upset. It's hard to feel sorry for myself when there are some people having a much worse Christmas than me. If you're having a true disaster of a Christmas, I am truly sorry and I hope you pull through.

In one of my secret santas this year I have bought a digital copy of a solo RPG to give, however as it's only a PDF I'm not really sure what the best way to go about presenting this on the day of the exchange would be. I want there to be something for her to open, I know that much. In an ideal world whatever she opens will link to a download of the PDF or something, so maybe a QR code situation of some sort?

1. When did you stop celebrating?
2. Why did you stop celebrating?
3. How have family and friends responded?
4. What do you do instead, if anything?

Disclaimer - I am not aiming to shame or undermine those who do celebrate, this is just friendly a discussion for those who don’t.

I am interested in the amount of variety there is in Christmas dinners. In the UK it tends to be roast meat (and turkey is popular) and a lot of roast veg. The table ends up being quite complicated because Aunt Mabel really wants cauliflower cheese and Cousin Bert needs that braised red cabbage and etc so you end up with a lot of stuff set out.

And that's just the UK - I'd be really interested to know about what people eat in other places.

For me it's going to be simple and quiet this year. Chemotherapy and immunotherapy mean my immune system is struggling and I feel very gently nauseous. I am going to have roast chicken, glazed roast parsnips, carrots (not sure whether mashed, or roasted, or gently steamed), roast potatoes, and roast sprouts. And then my sister made me a Christmas pudding so I'll have that for after.

Here's a description of and recipe for Christmas Pudding: https://www.nigella.com/recipes/ultimate-christmas-pudding

I've offered to cook Christmas Dinner for my husband's side of the family, but have one problem. While my husband and I aren't the biggest beef eaters nor big fans of steak, my in-laws are. I don't mind cooking for their requests and find it a fun challenge to cook a different type of meat, but here's the concern: due to not regularly cooking it, I'm not as well versed in the methods or approaches.

They would prefer either a prime rib roast or beef tenderloin; both cuts I have never worked with. While there are a number of recipes out there, I would like see if anyone on Tildes has a recommendation on how to cook either cut or another of similar quality. My mother-in-law does not like a lot of pink appearing in her steaks as well, so I'm having to consider how to handle that while also not over cooking the meat. I was already considering dry brining it overnight, but after that I'm unsure what direction i would go.

Any tips and advice would be greatly appreciated!

One of my favorite movies to watch during the holidays is The Secret Life of Walter Mitty. It came out on Christmas day and helped me deal with a lot of things that were happening during the winter of 2013. When the winter days get short, I like to revisit the movie because it makes me feel better. What movies do you like watch during the holiday season, that doesn't have Christmas as a theme?

Open to anything from Hallmark-style movies with particularly ridiculous storylines, horror movies with a Christmas twist, or childhood classics that are a lot crazier than we might remember them as children.

It's that magical time of year where I'm being badgered for a Christmas list. I'm 44, have 3 middle teens and a 3 year old (he's late to the party). I have everything I need, but I get asked anyway. I don't want just socks and random tops that I'm not a fan of this year, so I need ideas.

Hobby wise, I'm in IT so tech is already done and not something I can ask for. Asking for a 9" grinder so I can remove some posts next year seems a bit non-chrismassy, or is it because it's something I need and will use?

HELP!

I’m going insane from the bland ass Xmas music at my work and I’m looking to zhuzh up the playlist with some more interesting Xmas music. Think “Christmas at the Zoo” by the Flaming Lips or “Merry Christmas (I Don’t Wanna Fight Tonight)” by The Ramones.

I would also like some non-Christmas holiday songs, so we can get some representation for holidays besides the Christian one, or even just “Winter Songs”

Thanks!

Telling “scary ghost stories” at the holidays isn’t just a seemingly out-of-place line in the song “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” or the plot of A Christmas Carol - it’s actually a very old tradition stretching back to pagan Yule festivals and Winter Solstice celebrations. So please share yours with us: true or false, but preferably true.

It's officially Christmas in New Zealand. Australian parents are telling their kids they want just a few more minutes to sleep in. Santa is over Zambia.

I hope you all enjoy your time with family and friends (and kooky internet weirdos such as myself.)

My favourite not-all-that-Christmassy song that it wouldn't really be Christmas without is Tar Barrel in Dale by The Unthanks. It's really more of a new year's song and it's certainly not very jolly. But it is very lovely, I think best enjoyed on a cold afternoon in mid-December, with a nice hot drink and a warm coat.

Thought I'd post a general conversation thread for folks who might not be spending time with family or friends on Christmas. What are you doing on your own for Christmas, or what are you missing out on?