14 votes

"Bow nigger" - A short story of an encounter with a troll in Star Wars Jedi Outcast

2 comments

  1. Emerald_Knight
    Link
    That was an enjoyable read. There's always something that's just so satisfying about giving a troll or flamer the cold hard fist of justice. I have only one not-so-impressive and not-so-glamorous...

    That was an enjoyable read. There's always something that's just so satisfying about giving a troll or flamer the cold hard fist of justice.

    I have only one not-so-impressive and not-so-glamorous tale to recall. Battlefield 3, I was a sniper with rarely an equal. In rush matches as part of the attacking team, some rapid, well-placed headshots often served to give my teammates the opening they needed to push forward. When things got particularly rough, an ammo supply box and a steady stream of drones swooping down upon the enemy could sow confusion and discord among the enemy while taking out their forces one-by-one, providing much-needed relief along important choke points. There was rarely a time when my own teammates would complain.

    The enemy was a different matter. I would occasionally receive some angsty "git gud" messages, but they weren't really anything to worry about. That is, until one of my drone strikes hit someone by the name of "We Are Marshall", who I will hereby refer to as WAM--the exact username I can't remember. WAM did not take kindly to my long-range strikes, and he made sure to make this point very clear. His angsty fury was dripping through every word in his message. Rather than being the normal, expected, sort of (but not really) light-hearted trash talking that you come to expect from gamers, WAM showed no sense of basic decency and attacked me rather harshly, and ended his message suggesting that I can't play worth shit and have to resort to sniping.

    I didn't get upset, mind you. Oh no. I considered this a challenge, and the perfect learning opportunity for WAM. PTFO? More like GTFO. I stopped worrying about playing the objective. I stopped paying any mind to any of the other enemies in the match. For the rest of the match, and for the entirety of all of the following matches, WAM became my own personal punching bag. Well, more specifically, my drone's punching bag. Wherever WAM was, my drone followed, swooped down, and executed him on the spot. Whenever he managed to destroy it, a new one was immediately sent on its way over to his last known location and he was summarily disposed of. Whenever he found a place to hide and thought he was safe from my team, my drone was there to ruin any sense of security he had.

    The end of this story is pretty anti-climactic: his messages grew ever more spiteful over time, until gradually he grew to accept his demotion to Drone Fodder First Class, became far less hostile, and finally stopped messaging me altogether. Eventually matchmaking quit putting us together, and I never saw him again after that.

    I can only hope that he learned not to take the game so seriously after that and to try to have fun moving forward.

    7 votes
  2. chocolate
    Link
    In the fourth paragraph, I realised he wasn't being mocked for using a bow.

    In the fourth paragraph, I realised he wasn't being mocked for using a bow.

    5 votes