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    1. Fitness Weekly Discussion

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started...

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

      6 votes
    2. Fitness Weekly Discussion

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started...

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

      13 votes
    3. Fitness Weekly Discussion

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started...

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

      10 votes
    4. Fitness Weekly Discussion

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started...

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

      10 votes
    5. Fitness Weekly Discussion

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started...

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

      6 votes
    6. Fitness Weekly Discussion

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started...

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

      5 votes
    7. Fitness Weekly Discussion

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started...

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

      6 votes
    8. Fitness Weekly Discussion #2

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started...

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym? Started a new diet or have a new recipe you want to share? Anything else health and wellness related?

      9 votes
    9. Fitness Weekly Discussion #1

      What have you been doing lately for your own fitness? Try out any new programs or exercises? Have any questions for others about your training? Want to vent about poor behavior in the gym?

      14 votes
    10. What are your mental health upkeep habits/lifestyle?

      I've seen a few posts about sharing issues, but I don't think anything about habits. I'm former "quantitative-self" hobbyist (if you want to call it that), keener and have a side interest in...

      I've seen a few posts about sharing issues, but I don't think anything about habits. I'm former "quantitative-self" hobbyist (if you want to call it that), keener and have a side interest in psychiatry. So in my personal life I'm very active and serious about my own short and long-term mental health. I'm wondering if anyone shares my habits or has others I have not considered. I wont link any literature because there is a lot out there to support most of these habits and I can't make this exhaustive (but I'm happy to help find specific resources).

      Morning quiet time. I wake up early and spend about an hour drinking tea, looking outside and reading. The major benefit here is it gives me a buffer before the start of the day. I used to get up and rush out of the door - I would be stressed from the start and wouldn't have an idea of how to go about my day effectively.

      Reading fiction. I used to read a lot more non-fiction (pop sci and "self-help") but I found with fiction (and also biographies) not only is it generally easier content to process, but the narratives can be therapeutic. There is something about getting exposed to other peoples thought processes (real or not) and overcoming of challenges that can be comforting or inspiring when facing your own.

      Aerobic exercise. And also anything exhaustive - as in you gave it all of your energy. The general health benefits are obviously well established at this point. But, a subjective (AFAIK) experience of mine is the feeling of self-actualization - a sense of victory and fulfillment you can get almost anytime anywhere, and fairly frequently.

      Regular social contact. Specifically AFK/face-to-face. This seems banal but it's really not. I make a serious active effort here - I think about who I haven't seen in a while, who I might feel like would complement or share my vibes right now or near future and make plans ASAP. This among the most important of my habits, or at least has the most therapeutic effect. Something about social interactions, even if they're just about talking shit, can be therapeutic and energizing. And this is coming from someone who is generally an introvert and would usually prefer to stay home.

      Restrict social media. I probably don't need to explain this one. But I'll also add that, after following the advice of someone on Tildes (sorry I can't find the post!) limiting my news source to only the Current Events of Wikipedia has done wonders for me! I've stayed informed and have avoided the anxiety-inducing clusterfucks of newstainment. I group this with social media because they're so close nowadays (gossip?).

      Meditation. Big one right here. I've been practicing for ~7 years now, and it's very noticeable when I skip a 20 min session a few days in a row - I become more agitated, short tempered and anxious (is depressed, but mainly just too focused on myself either way). Specifically "mindfulness" (loose term) or Vipassanā style (I use and highly recommend Waking Up). Style here is important because they all exercise different neural pathways. The product of this practice 1) being much more aware of what has emotionally triggered me and 2) being more able to let go/resolve of negative states of mind. E.g. instead of grinding my teeth with a negative thought train the past 3 hours I notice it's all petty within a moment or two and am able to move on and focus on my task at hand and later sleep soundly.

      Psychedelics. Namely the tried-and-true classics. This one is finally getting the attention it deserves in the public domain. As opposed to the others which I do on a near-daily basis (aim for daily), psychedelic experiences I limit to only a handful of times per year because 1) it's work, it requires planning and a day or two off; 2) the positive/resolving effects last for months/years/lifetime; and 3) it requires integration with you baseline reality life to really be effective.
      This one hands down has provided me the most benefit out of all and has inspired me to actively pursue everything above, especially meditation and social life. Specifically, it's the perspective you can get from a psychedelic experience that can be like years of therapy because it's all internally-motivated - you can get an objective perspective on you own life that no one else can offer and one you normally would not accept, especially if it's self-critical.
      For best results I do this with close friends, at home and/or in nature - taking long walks by the river or woods. Sometimes quiet time at some point as well, to allow self-reflection, taking a moment for an honest review and check in.

      Safety disclaimer Psychedelics, and also exhaustive workouts and meditation, can have serious adverse effects if done in excess or without proper planning. Always practice harm reduction: do your research (e.g. Erowid for substance info) test your drugs, carry Naloxone and *always* have a friend, at leas to check in with. Start small - you can always take more but not less.
      32 votes
    11. Fitness tracker recommendations?

      I'm in the market for a fitness tracker. My usual fitness activities (stationary elliptical trainer, hiking, biking) are temporarily restricted, so I've been swimming a great deal. Using a phone...

      I'm in the market for a fitness tracker.

      My usual fitness activities (stationary elliptical trainer, hiking, biking) are temporarily restricted, so I've been swimming a great deal. Using a phone isn't giving me adequate exertion tracking data for walking (stride counts and heart rate not available/accurate), and it's especially not useful for aquatics.

      I'd be grateful if anyone can recommend something they have experience with.

      My constraints are as follows:

      I'd rather not contribute to e-waste with yet another gadget du jour - service life should be at least the recharge cycle life of the battery.

      No Apple or Samsung devices. I'm not in those ecosystems, and don't plan to be because reasons.

      Should be at least IPX5, preferably IPX7 waterproof.

      Helps if it's not butt-ugly, but I'll take what I can get - replaceable bands are a plus.

      Able to fit women - I don't have issues with a larger face so much as a band that's too large to fit comfortably or provide secure contact for accurate heart rate monitoring.

      GPS and sleep tracking would be nice, but not mandatory if the device ecosystem isn't reasonably private.

      Non-proprietary rechargers preferred.

      A couple of Fitbit models seem be well-reviewed, but actual user ratings are equivocal, and quality is erratic.

      Looking forward to any contributions!

      11 votes
    12. Weightlifters: your stories of pain?

      I was feeling great in the gym yesterday and switched up my normal deadlift by using the hex bar. It requires a slightly different posture than the straight bar deadlift but felt so good that I...

      I was feeling great in the gym yesterday and switched up my normal deadlift by using the hex bar. It requires a slightly different posture than the straight bar deadlift but felt so good that I kept adding on weight and, evidently, speeding up. What happens when you get a little too enthusiastic under load? Zzzlip! There went my back. So I’m home from work today, barely able to hobble around. Ibuprofen is not enough. I sneezed earlier and it felt like someone had inserted a power drill into my lower spinal column. Yep, I’m feeling stupid today.

      Weightlifters, what are your stories of pain? I’m sure there are some good stories out there.

      9 votes
    13. Does anybody here use a wake up light?

      I'm working on some sleep hygiene habits at the moment and would like to know if anyone has any feedback, good or bad, for using a wake up lamp/sunrise alarm clock. I have to get up for work...

      I'm working on some sleep hygiene habits at the moment and would like to know if anyone has any feedback, good or bad, for using a wake up lamp/sunrise alarm clock. I have to get up for work before it's light outside so this wouldn't be replicable by just leaving my blinds open.

      Part of me likes the idea of a softer, gentler wakeup from light rather than noise, but there's another part of me that's worried I'll hate it just as much as I hate my alarm clock. My bullshit detector is also ringing pretty loudly when I see that the flagship brand name model is selling for $200 USD. Two hundred dollars for... a... light... that... slowly... turns... on. What?!?!

      Nevertheless, maybe there's something I'm missing here (like the other $180 worth of technology presumably hidden in there). As such, I'm interested in hearing from anyone who has one. I'd love to hear your experiences and, if you're willing to share, which model you have.

      14 votes
    14. Mental health support & discussion thread (August 2019 edition)

      after a month sabbatical, we're back. this is pretty straightforward, i think: vent your experiences or things you need to get off your chest/share whatever you've found helps you mentally/etc....

      after a month sabbatical, we're back. this is pretty straightforward, i think: vent your experiences or things you need to get off your chest/share whatever you've found helps you mentally/etc.


      resources that might also be of some benefit to people:


      and here is the june thread if you'd like to reference/update us on something you mentioned there.

      15 votes
    15. Weight loss for older people?

      My mom is almost 65 and she's pretty heavy. It has got to the point where it's affecting her life quality - she often has joint pain, heart problems, clogged arteries... She has to lose weight,...

      My mom is almost 65 and she's pretty heavy. It has got to the point where it's affecting her life quality - she often has joint pain, heart problems, clogged arteries... She has to lose weight, basically. Problem is, I feel like she has no motivation to do so. She never even tried doing it. I researched a bit online, and it seems like older people have it harder to lose weight, not just mentally, but also physically because they have less muscle mass and stuff. Is there anyone more knowledgeable on this topic?

      9 votes
    16. Do you practice any form of meditation?

      I practiced and studied Zen meditation in many periods of my life, and it helped me immensely. I find it's philosophy reasonable and compelling: the basic idea of simply doing what's in front of...

      I practiced and studied Zen meditation in many periods of my life, and it helped me immensely.

      I find it's philosophy reasonable and compelling: the basic idea of simply doing what's in front of you. If you have to do the dishes, do the dishes and nothing else. Be full in the act of doing the dishes.

      Zen writing and meditation reduce my anxiety by helping me look at life in a more positive and expontaneous way. Paradoxically, worrying less about results usually gets much better results.

      With that said, I ask:

      • Do you practice any form of meditation? Which one?
      • What was your initial purpose for practicing meditation?
      • Are you still doing it? Why?
      • Do you study the philosophical, scientifical or religious aspects behind your practice?
      25 votes
    17. Mental health support & discussion thread (May 2019 edition)

      a couple of people have commented on this thread being helpful for them since tildes is a pretty welcoming community and this thread seems like something that would be nice to make regular...

      a couple of people have commented on this thread being helpful for them since tildes is a pretty welcoming community and this thread seems like something that would be nice to make regular anyways, so let's do that. this is pretty straightforward, i think: vent your experiences or things you need to get off your chest/share whatever you've found helps you mentally/etc.

      resources that might also be of some benefit to you, since i have a list i informally maintain (s/o to cfabbro also for supplementing this list):

      20 votes
    18. Mental health support & discussion thread (June 2019 edition)

      also going to toss this one up before i go to sleep this morning. this is pretty straightforward, i think: vent your experiences or things you need to get off your chest/share whatever you've...

      also going to toss this one up before i go to sleep this morning. this is pretty straightforward, i think: vent your experiences or things you need to get off your chest/share whatever you've found helps you mentally/etc.


      resources that might also be of some benefit to people:


      and here is the may thread if you'd like to reference/update us on something you mentioned there.

      16 votes
    19. Anyone out there looking for a health community?

      Hello hello! Not sure if this is going to gain much traction but I thought I might as well give it a try. Is there anyone out in Tildes who is looking to start making a lifestyle change that would...

      Hello hello!

      Not sure if this is going to gain much traction but I thought I might as well give it a try. Is there anyone out in Tildes who is looking to start making a lifestyle change that would benefit from having a sense of community? Trying to make diet changes (cutting back on sugar, no more fast food)? Starting a new diet? Starting going to the gym? Cutting alcohol out of your life? Trying to start sleeping more (because not getting sleep is real bad )?

      I'm trying to gauge if there is interest in a weekly (or maybe more frequent?) discussion thread for people to talk about what changes they are making to live a healthier life, have people to talk about and discuss their struggles with, and just form a community to help us all succeed.

      For example, I'm sadly am quitting my current gym membership. I have been boxing with the same coaches for 3 years now, but with my new job the gym is now 30 minutes out of my way rather than along my commute home, and at $120 a month I can't make it there often enough to justify the cost. My company has a gym in-building that is really solid, and I met with a trainer to get a workout plan made tailor-made to my goals. However, I am SO LAZY without a community of people keeping on me. I really relied on my gym friends and coaches to call me out when I wasn't going to the gym and when I was half-assing classes. Mostly what I'm looking for is people to talk to about working out, the struggles of forcing yourself to go when you don't want to, struggles of being an ex-athlete and losing all the structure your use to your workouts having, and how people are fueling their bodies to succeed. But I recognize that my health issues aren't universal, so I don't want this post to be just what I want/need. I want to hear if there is interest, and try to build something for the community, not just me.

      15 votes
    20. Nootropics & Student

      What do you guys think about nootropics for Uni student, is it safe, efficiency and helpful especially for normal people? Did you tried any of them ? And what is your opinion? I'm interested in...

      What do you guys think about nootropics for Uni student, is it safe, efficiency and helpful especially for normal people? Did you tried any of them ? And what is your opinion?

      I'm interested in mood/motivation & memory drugs.

      I have done a bit reswarch over internet, but I'm not sure about what I did read.
      And sorry I don't know if this post should be here or in ~envo

      7 votes
    21. On Having No Head (D. E. Harding) - Help me understand

      I've been interested in meditation for some time now - tempted by the insight into the human condition that it purports to offer - but I haven't yet experienced any kind of 'breakthrough' moment...

      I've been interested in meditation for some time now - tempted by the insight into the human condition that it purports to offer - but I haven't yet experienced any kind of 'breakthrough' moment that has brought any clarity, let alone insight.

      I have read Sam Harris's Waking Up, and have done some of the course in his app. The most I've been able to achieve is to observe (and subsequently limit, control) getting angry. This has proven pretty useful but doesn't feel profound.

      Anyway, I'm now about half way through D. E. Harding's On Having No Head, and I am struggling with it.

      I keep telling myself to stick with it because what he's saying might become clear, but I'm finding the reasoning behind it to be wilfully obtuse at times. I fear I'm exposing myself as some kind of idiot in even asking about it, but can someone help me see his point?

      He talks about looking at what you're pointing at. Makes sense. I can see those things, therefore they're there.
      And then to point at your face. You can't see that. Ok. Makes sense. I can't see that, therefore it's not there?
      I can vaguely see a blur of my nose, but that isn't anything worth worrying about?

      But I can demonstrate that it's there. I can photograph it. I can look at it in a mirror. I can touch it and feel it (and it can feel).

      I feel like I'm the fool staring at a metaphor and screaming about it not being real but I can't see the bit I'm missing!

      Does anyone have any insight they can share?

      4 votes
    22. What's your lifting/exercise routine history? And now?

      So, tilder person. What is your lifting/exercise routine right now, what works and don't for you, what you did in the past, what method, what supplements, anything. Let's trade ideas, rants and...

      So, tilder person. What is your lifting/exercise routine right now, what works and don't for you, what you did in the past, what method, what supplements, anything.

      Let's trade ideas, rants and nude pictures of our sculpted bodies.

      I just woke up from a nightmare. I will go back to sleep and post my part later.

      12 votes
    23. American asking - how does your country's healthcare system perform for you?

      So I've almost (March 29) quit an IT role in a U.S. company that functions with the private healthcare market. It's been long evident to me that most industrialized nations have much more sensible...

      So I've almost (March 29) quit an IT role in a U.S. company that functions with the private healthcare market. It's been long evident to me that most industrialized nations have much more sensible systems, and my employer's business model would be nonexistent outside the U.S.

      There's a current political trend towards "Medicare for All", basically a single-payer system for existing health services. The prevailing resistance comes from insurers, whose business models will cease to exist, and those whose compensation might be cut (physicians and hospitals) up to 50% under the current scheme for U.S. Medicare. That's leaving aside pharmaceutical companies.

      I'm trying to decide where my political time should be spent - the "Medicare for All" slogan is great for bumper stickers, but are there other models that work better?

      Please talk about your nation's policies - the good, the bad, and the ugly. Tildes is mostly a young crowd that might not have direct experience of major medical need, but any commentary on what has worked and what doesn't is welcome.

      31 votes
    24. Going to work in South Africa, with a depression prescription

      Good news: I'll be starting my new work in Cape Town, South Africa soon. Not so good news: I have depression, and is currently on the antidepressant Sertraline. My question would be the following:...

      Good news: I'll be starting my new work in Cape Town, South Africa soon.

      Not so good news: I have depression, and is currently on the antidepressant Sertraline.

      My question would be the following:

      How are prescriptions of the antidepressant handled in the South African health care system? Can I obtain, from either a GP or a Specialist, a sort of "long-standing" prescription, valid for (say) a few months, that will allow me to refill at pharmacies or dispensing GPs, without me having to be referred to a Specialist each time I need a refill? I understand that recurring examinations by a Specialist are likely necessary, but I don't expect those to be frequent, as my condition is fairly stable now.

      Also a related question: I'm otherwise young and physically healthy, not affected by chronic conditions except depression. However, it seems that any health insurance schemes there that cover my condition would be rather expensive. Those policies typically include a broad coverage of chronic conditions, most of which I don't foresee a need. For one like myself, what suggestion would you give in terms of health insurance selection?

      Many many thanks <3

      7 votes
    25. How do you guys deal with alcohol?

      Even since my teenage years it's been a problem. They say people who start drinking sooner will probably develop alcohol problems and it seems to be the case with me and the majority of my...

      Even since my teenage years it's been a problem. They say people who start drinking sooner will probably develop alcohol problems and it seems to be the case with me and the majority of my friends. We are friends since little kids and we started drinking together when we were about 16 or 17 i think (i'm 32 now).

      Every single one of us has a problem with binge drinking. I think i'm the less worse case among us since i can keep myself from drinking for days and usually have only one binge per week or less. They drink almost every day. I'm better than when i was younger, but it's still bad.

      When i go out to drink i chug down +/- 3600ml (121oz) of cheap beer. It doesn't matter if it's craft/expensive beer, i will just get drunker and poorer in this case.

      It's what happened yesterday. Now i'm hungover and just depressed.

      How do you guys deal with alcohol? Is it a problem? Is it something you want to change or it doesn't bother you?

      20 votes
    26. your ways of staying healthy?

      I've been programmer for past 4 years and signs of sedentary life, not being active and overconsuming certain stuff is showing... what do you do to stay healthy? I plan on signup for a swimming...

      I've been programmer for past 4 years and signs of sedentary life, not being active and overconsuming certain stuff is showing... what do you do to stay healthy?
      I plan on signup for a swimming pool, I started IF but I fail too many times.. Also i'm trying to cut sugar as much as possible but today was a really bad day in this regard...

      my goal is not to get thiner. (i don't consider myself fat where it would be determinal to my health).
      my problem is that I feel like my muscles are always tired (can't explain, like I could be strecthing them all day long and they would feel tired), my right side of body starts hurting everyday after 14:00 (+/- few hours, depends on what I am doing). I have regular lower back pains... :(

      edit2:
      wasn't on computer for the whole day after posting. thanks for all the responses.
      My plan for the following weeks is:
      -Waking at regular hours (6:30)
      -Going to beed at regular hours (22:00 - 22:30)
      -My morning routine will be:
      some water, wimhof breathing, stretching, shower, coffee -> work.
      I'll signup for a swimming pool and try to get my active hours in by going to swimming pool 3-5 times per week.
      Regarding food:
      Intermitting fasting between 12-20, no sugar, only tea,coffee,water.
      Will be cooking my own meal every day / meal prep for the whole week.
      all above should be simple to implement and not too hard to give up. On days when I will not feel energetic I'll take some modafinil in the morning.
      Also I'll be abstaining from alchocol and any drug... also I'll try to smoke weed on weekends only in small quantites.
      all the above shouldn't be hard to do because I allready do some of the things above...
      I try to do wimhof breathing when I can, I cook 2-3 times per week. so the biggest ones will be:
      giving up daily weed, signing up for swimming pool, going to sleep and waking up at regular hours.

      15 votes
    27. What habits help your sleep the most?

      For me, it has to be getting up the moment I wake up. No matter if I wake up before the alarm, I still get up. That helps a lot with fighting oversleeping. Not only am I late, but I also feel bad...

      For me, it has to be getting up the moment I wake up. No matter if I wake up before the alarm, I still get up. That helps a lot with fighting oversleeping. Not only am I late, but I also feel bad after spending a lot of time in bed, my head often hurts. So I only figured I better spend less time sleeping than more. And it works, too!

      20 votes
    28. Any advice on getting rid of intrusive thoughts?

      Sometimes when I am thinking, these bad thoughts come into my mind, specifically images. I would rather elaborate not elaborate what the images are but they are all connected by a single object. I...

      Sometimes when I am thinking, these bad thoughts come into my mind, specifically images. I would rather elaborate not elaborate what the images are but they are all connected by a single object.

      I have tried meditation, and while I feel at peace for a few hours after meditating, the thoughts haven't really left long-term or gone down in frequency. Maybe I am meditating wrong. I am blindsided every time the thoughts appear.

      Anyone have any experience with this?

      30 votes
    29. How do you deal with stress and anxiety in a healthy way?

      I'll preface this by saying that I'm a high school student, so obviously I can't be facing any real stress, but it seems real enough to me, anyway. My strategy is usually just to bury it in...

      I'll preface this by saying that I'm a high school student, so obviously I can't be facing any real stress, but it seems real enough to me, anyway. My strategy is usually just to bury it in entertainment, but I see a lot of the people around me turning to using substances like nicotine, weed, or alcohol.

      I don't think any of these are really good options, so I'd like to hear what you guys do.

      22 votes
    30. Looking for advice on mother's deteriorating mental health

      Hey, I dunno if this is an appropriate place for this, and feel free to take it down if it's too direct/off-topic or what have you. I can't post this on reddit because my mom browses reddit and it...

      Hey, I dunno if this is an appropriate place for this, and feel free to take it down if it's too direct/off-topic or what have you. I can't post this on reddit because my mom browses reddit and it would be painfully obvious.

      So, as some of you may know, Backpage was a website like craigslist that got shut down completely due to complaints/reports of trafficking. In that shutdown, many people lost their jobs, my mother being one of them. My mom received a severance pay, and had to find work. Within that same timeframe, she also broke things off with a man whom she had been dating prior for reasons I still don't know. After having to sell her house, she tried to make it on her own, but then inevitably had to come and live with me and my Dad (Whom she had divorced about 10 years prior)). At some point a year or so ago, she had a nasty fall and hit her head, concussing her. Lately, she seems to be coming unhinged.

      Her behavior started with her continually retroactively accusing my father of cheating on her ~15 years ago on several occasions based off of information she swears happened but cannot corroborate. She has, in recent memory, been known to make false claims and, when presented with proof refuting her claims, to discard said proof and continue to push her claims instead. She has tried to get me to "remember" incidents over 10 years ago where she ran across "women who were his type". On top of that, she has accused my father of going into businesses she has applied for and telling them not to hire her. My dad wants nothing more than for her to get back up on her feet and get going. I have no idea why she would believe this.

      We had another incident where my little sister went downstairs to get something to eat, and used the microwave to prepare it. My mother interjected and told Ali that she shouldn't be using the microwave because she's afraid of the radiation it gives off. My little sister politely told her that that was bullshit and that she isn't worried. My mother then grew angry, told her something along the lines of "Fine, I'm not going to care if you die then", took her phone, and sent her upstairs (We all shave our rooms upstairs and she has her space downstairs, where the guest room is). This isn't the first time she's posited a completely ridiculous and baseless claim/conspiracy/concern, however I hadn't tried to refute it before.

      I texted my Aunt and debriefed her, and she said that she was aware of my mother's mental health declining, and she wanted to help, but I guess she said something my mom didn't like, because my mom has since blocked her on her phone, severing the only means of communication between them (She's 2 states away). My mom seems to keep doing this to people; saying and believing untrue/ridiculous things and becoming increasingly angry and hateful when she is refuted or called out on it. She has severed ties with her Aunt, the sister of my deceased grandmother, who tried to tell her she was wrong after accusing my grandmother of various things she didn't do. She doesn't have any family left that she hasn't pissed off.

      The only person left in my house who she isn't angry at is me, but I am supremely bad at handling these things and would much rather retreat into my room and not come out until it's all over. My girlfriend living with me is trying to provide support as well. This morning, my mother asked me to drop her off at a homeless shelter. She has a bed, food, clothes, a shower and restroom, and WiFi here, but she feels so much that my father is the root of all of her problems that she wants to leave at any cost.

      I don't know what to do now that my mother is slowly and surely losing her goddamn mind and is driving out everyone who loves her when they don't reaffirm her insane delusions and accusations. It hurts to see my father struggling to do something, because he can't just kick out the mother of his children; he still loves the woman he married. We can't tell her she needs to seek help, because that is interpreted as an insult and calling her crazy. I've tried, again and again, to tell her that we are all here to help her and we want the best for her but she seems to discard every good thing I say and pick out the worst, even if I didn't intend any kind of negativity. She's getting to the point where she's beginning to lose her temper with me and I'm afraid that that will be the final nail in the coffin. My father tried calling some place (I believe they specialized in mentally unwell people) and asking for advice, but when he asked them to call my mother and they agreed, my mother got angry at them and accused them of "collecting evidence" for my father. It's out of their hands if she isn't harming herself or others.

      I don't really know what I expect from posting this. Maybe commiseration, maybe sympathy, or advice, but I'm going fucking insane and do not have any prior experience to help me cope with/fix this and I would really appreciate if anybody does and they're willing to share

      21 votes
    31. What stops some US states from providing universal healthcare on their own?

      I'm not very familiar with how government works in the US, and I've always had this question. Like, if states are reasonably independent, and it seems like there are some states who lean way more...

      I'm not very familiar with how government works in the US, and I've always had this question.

      Like, if states are reasonably independent, and it seems like there are some states who lean way more into the socially liberal side of the spectrum from providing universal healthcare (or at least some better healthcare policies) on their own?

      21 votes
    32. Do you exercise at home and/or in gym? What's your goal? Favorite exercise?

      I used to be skinny and indifferent to fitness, but a couple years ago decided to try weight lifting at gym. I didn't last long because got bored going there every time. Recently I got dumbbells...

      I used to be skinny and indifferent to fitness, but a couple years ago decided to try weight lifting at gym. I didn't last long because got bored going there every time. Recently I got dumbbells for home and working out with them goes way better for me: instant and full availability, personal shower afterwards, and cozy privacy of home.

      My favorite exercise is single dumbbell pullover lying on a stool, upper body is exercised pretty well, especially upper chest.

      With attention to sufficient meals my weight started increasing and that feels cool, it would be nice to have more confidence and self contentment with a not so skinny body.

      And what's your story?

      20 votes
    33. How do you handle stress, anxiety, and anything else you might deal with during your day?

      Something about posting on psuedoanonymous internet forums tends to quiet panic attacks for me personally, at least. I'd be interested in hearing your methods of coping/mitigating symptoms for...

      Something about posting on psuedoanonymous internet forums tends to quiet panic attacks for me personally, at least. I'd be interested in hearing your methods of coping/mitigating symptoms for things that ail you from day-to-day.

      29 votes
    34. Would you consider it unhealthy to smoke pot twice a day recreationally?

      i just started getting into drugs and have found that it's more comfortable to smoke around two bowls a day after lunch and after dinner, i only smoke after i've finished all my tasks for the next...

      i just started getting into drugs and have found that it's more comfortable to smoke around two bowls a day after lunch and after dinner, i only smoke after i've finished all my tasks for the next few hours, and i don't let it drain my wallet. opinons? also if anybody here is starchy against legalization please give me your reasons i want to understand both sides of the issue.

      19 votes
    35. Keto diet for picky eaters?

      Wanted to Get some Input from anyone who may have tried the Keto Diet. Has any picky eaters tried the Keto diet and seen results? If so can you share some metrics? what you have tried, and in...

      Wanted to Get some Input from anyone who may have tried the Keto Diet. Has any picky eaters tried the Keto diet and seen results? If so can you share some metrics? what you have tried, and in general if it works for such people.

      5 votes
    36. Gym Story Saturday

      One of my favorite things over at Reddit is /r/fitness's Gym Story Saturdays and Rant Wednesdays (and also /r/WeightRoom's daily threads). I don't know if we have enough gym goers people on Tildes...

      One of my favorite things over at Reddit is /r/fitness's Gym Story Saturdays and Rant Wednesdays (and also /r/WeightRoom's daily threads). I don't know if we have enough gym goers people on Tildes yet for a weekly thread on your adventures in fitness, but I figured I'd put one up and see what happens.

      This week I did week 2 of Pervertor for 5/3/1 and it has Boring But Big sets as supplemental work. The squat day was hell. This is probably because instead of doing typical BBB, five sets of ten at 50% of your train max, Pervertor does this at 65% of your TM. For me, this meant 5x10 squats at 235 lbs after doing the 5/3/1 sets. I just had to sit down after it was done, couldn't immediately move on to my assistance work. My lower back was especially feeling it, but quads were on fire too. Luckily, was ready to go in a few minutes, but I've never had to just sit there and take a break before workouts like that in my near three years of program lifting.

      But no one ever starting lifting weights because they wanted it to be easy.

      Anyway, I'm sure y'all probably have better stories than "it was hard to things." Let's hear them.

      6 votes
    37. Friday Health Achievement Thread - brag and talk about your accomplishments here!

      Happy Friday everyone! I thought that a solid discussion could be spawned out of us talking about weekly health goals and how we've achieved them, so I invite y'all to tell us all about them. Have...

      Happy Friday everyone! I thought that a solid discussion could be spawned out of us talking about weekly health goals and how we've achieved them, so I invite y'all to tell us all about them. Have you recently hit a new personal record in weight-lifting? Run your first mile in ten years? Or have you just been maintaining a good, consistent routine?

      8 votes
    38. Anyone here ever use a guided meditation on YouTube?

      There's been an explosion over the past few years, and there's so many to try, but a lot of them don't work for me due to me just not feeling soothed by the speaker's voice. There's Guided...

      There's been an explosion over the past few years, and there's so many to try, but a lot of them don't work for me due to me just not feeling soothed by the speaker's voice. There's Guided Meditations to help you sleep, to help calm anxiety, to connect to your higher self, etc. Any suggestions? Links much appreciated!

      6 votes
    39. Sunburn Remedies

      It’s that time of year in the Northern Hemisphere- lots of sun and (often) inadequate sunblock usage. What are your tried-and-true remedies, excluding aloe since that one seems common knowledge at...

      It’s that time of year in the Northern Hemisphere- lots of sun and (often) inadequate sunblock usage.

      What are your tried-and-true remedies, excluding aloe since that one seems common knowledge at this point.

      8 votes
    40. Intermittent fasting, thoughts?

      Hey everyone, Intermittent fasting is a diet where the user fasts for either periods of their day for 10-16 hours or for set days throughout their week. As long as you don't binge eat and stick to...

      Hey everyone,

      Intermittent fasting is a diet where the user fasts for either periods of their day for 10-16 hours or for set days throughout their week. As long as you don't binge eat and stick to your diet, it's a good option for losing weight. There's other science coming out from rodent testing concerning other potential benefits, though that's not always consistent for the effects on humans.

      Check out this article for more information

      So, any thoughts or experiences? Who else eats breakfast at 2pm?

      12 votes
    41. Looking for good vegan meal plans that are right around 2000 calories

      I am putting on a fair amount stomach fat. I am not really gaining weight, but my stomach is noticeably bigger and I am getting chubby. I am uncomfortable all the time at work sitting at my desk...

      I am putting on a fair amount stomach fat. I am not really gaining weight, but my stomach is noticeably bigger and I am getting chubby. I am uncomfortable all the time at work sitting at my desk because of it. I'll be 30 in December so I need to get ahead of this. My body is tight all over. When I walk I can feel how tight my hamstrings are.. My diet is garbage. I just want to start getting this under control and also working on developing routines.

      What are some good resources on meal plans and what foods / combinations of foods and hat quantity is however many calories?

      I am a very simple person. I look these up and it says stuff like

      Breakfast: 1 cup Oatmeal, 2 tablespoons Almond butter, mixed in, top with cinnamon, 1/2 cup Blueberries

      Lunch: Tomato hummus artichoke salad

      Dinner: Veggie Chili - 1/2 cup black bean, 3/4 cup canned tomatoes and liquid, 1/2 cup sliced zucchini.........

      I like basic things. I like plain oatmeal and a banana, salad that is basically lettuce carrots tomatoes and no dressing. Some times I just want a few boiled potatoes for dinner (usually about 2 -3 halved making 4 - 6 halves) with nothing on them or an apple and some few carrots for lunch.. That's what I like.

      I really don't like to eat a big lunch at work because I sit at a desk all day and I have no way to burn the calories I take in. So I tend to skip eating at lunch since I don't get very hungry anyway..

      I am not currently vegan. I want to transition and I just need simple meal plan ideas for about 2000 calories so I can start exercising again and be able to burn more than I take in. I'd like to develop a routine of eating breakfast, lunch and dinner and being conscious of what I am taking in. Even if lunch is an apple and some carrots.

      Thanks.

      8 votes
    42. Has anyone tried the keto diet? If so, would you recommend it?

      For the last three years at university I've been eating like crap, but luckily my metabilism is relatively high so it hasn't really become much of an issue. Despite this, I still want to make a...

      For the last three years at university I've been eating like crap, but luckily my metabilism is relatively high so it hasn't really become much of an issue. Despite this, I still want to make a complete change and try and live a much more healthier life as I'm not going to be this age forever. I already cycle a lot, but I know exercise is one part of the equation and so I want to try a complete overhaul of my diet as well. I've heard and read a few things about the keto diet but was wondering if any other users have already tried. If so, did it work effectively? How hard was it to shift your eating habits and change up what you normally eat? I'm pretty confident I could manage it I would just like to see if anyone already has some experience with the diet and whether they would recommend it or not.

      16 votes
    43. Trying to become healthier

      Hey everyone. I keep a pretty rigorous watch on my calories and I am a vegetarian, so a lot of my meals consist of just vegetables. I am mostly healthy, but I have the hardest time kicking my only...

      Hey everyone. I keep a pretty rigorous watch on my calories and I am a vegetarian, so a lot of my meals consist of just vegetables. I am mostly healthy, but I have the hardest time kicking my only real vice: soda. I love it, and I may even be addicted. I gave it up last year for lent, but after my 40 days I immediately started drinking it again. I'm trying to cut back my sugar intake, and I keep finding ways to rationalize drinking it. Anyone out there with tips on how I can kick it for good?

      12 votes
    44. Those with mood disorders; how do you cope?

      I was curious if there are others on this site who struggle with mood disorders and what coping mechanisms are used. I myself was diagnosed bipolarII and have struggled with anxiety / depression...

      I was curious if there are others on this site who struggle with mood disorders and what coping mechanisms are used. I myself was diagnosed bipolarII and have struggled with anxiety / depression for my entire life. Initially I sought relief in medication and therapy but over the last several years have had great success with a variety of coping mechanisms. Specifically each morning I try to ensure I do several 'feel goods' that include:

      1. questions - "what am I happy/proud/grateful about? Why? How does that make me feel" and "Who do I love, who loves me, how does that make me feel?"
      2. Review core beliefs / positive affirmations that I keep on my google drive. Few examples: "I can weather any storm", "Failure is just feedback the current approach isn't working", "I am responsible for everything in my life"
      3. Journaling about feelings, what's happened.
      4. Meditation - 20-30 minutes following the breath

      I also find that keeping a regular sleep schedule, exercise routine, and scheduling a couple social events a week helps. I have learned drinking and other substance is especially damaging for me so I try my best to avoid as much as possible. I still cycle through depression and hypomania rather rapidly but these things help mitigate those highs and lows.

      What do you do to cope?

      16 votes