Given the well-known difficulties for men to maintain friendships as they age, has anyone managed to make new friends after their 40s?

lou
2024-03-29T18:42:23Z

dear mods

A lack in friendships is a well-known issue that affects adult males in particular. Please don't move this post to ~life. Thanks.

As I age, my ambivalence towards social interactions becomes clearer. I can't really sustain the doom and gloom facade, as it is entirely obvious that, if I ever achieve "solitary utopia", the first thing I would do would be to find someone to talk about how great it is to be alone.

I used to have an awesome way to do things where I saw my friends 5 or 6 times a year. It was enough for me. Unfortunately, that group is imploding since mid-pandemic, and I don't think there's a way back.

This is made worse by the fact that most men I know are either completely ignorant, downright hostile, or intentionally removed from anything relating kids or fatherhood. Sometimes it feels like I am carrying some kind of virus, and spending time with me will make them become fathers by association.

It's hard to not feel jealous of the kind of support my wife gets from her female friends.

Given the current situation, I feel inclined to ask. Has anyone managed to make meaningful friendships in their 40s or early 30s? And by that I don't mean just someone to play videogames with, but someone with whom you can share stuff?

I am not really opposed to friendships with women, but that is kinda covered already.

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