13 votes

Topic deleted by author

21 comments

  1. [5]
    Silbern
    Link
    Finishing out my Physics summer class, almost certainly not going to pass. Ngl, I've felt pretty depressed about this whole last university year, this isn't the first class I haven't passed. I'm...

    Finishing out my Physics summer class, almost certainly not going to pass. Ngl, I've felt pretty depressed about this whole last university year, this isn't the first class I haven't passed. I'm starting to feel really dejected about the future tbh, and I hate being a disappointment to myself and my parents.

    7 votes
    1. [3]
      moriarty
      Link Parent
      Hang in there! I went though my entire physics bachelor's totally depressed and thinking I'm a failure. Some things didn't come naturally to me and I had to spend a lot of time figuring it out....

      Hang in there! I went though my entire physics bachelor's totally depressed and thinking I'm a failure. Some things didn't come naturally to me and I had to spend a lot of time figuring it out. Then on my last year, I got to talking with the rest of my classmates - we went from a class of 300 to a graduating class of about 40 - and they've ALL been thinking that. It was such a relief to hear.
      Physics is one of the hardest degrees out there. You should feel proud to have succeeded thus far.
      Out of curiosity - what year are you? And what courses give you the most pain?

      6 votes
      1. [2]
        Silbern
        Link Parent
        1st year, I've actually a Computer Science student, but my Physics and Math classes are in my pre-reqs. The courses have primarily been Calc I twice and then Physics II. I thought at first it was...

        1st year, I've actually a Computer Science student, but my Physics and Math classes are in my pre-reqs. The courses have primarily been Calc I twice and then Physics II. I thought at first it was just me adapting to a public university, I was raised homeschooled, but I've since realized that it's because I'm not used to functioning in a learning setting with a ton of people and my poor time management skills. With my long commute and how fast paced some of the courses move, they just weren't adequate. I'm trying to improve them and I've made some progress over the summer, but I have a long way to go before Fall. At least I've been rocking my core CS classes, I'm one of the small number of people who managed to get an A in both my foundation classes without a curve, so at least that cheers me up. Thanks for your comment - I think that's also part of it. I did really well in school for almost all of my childhood, and I'm used to concepts coming fairly naturally. That's also something that hasn't held anymore so much, the classes are simply too advanced for me to rely on intuition to help me pick things up. But I'm trying some new study habits so I hope I can improve on the next semester. But I still feel like shit for wasting my parents' money...

        1 vote
        1. moriarty
          Link Parent
          Oh man, Calc I was the one class I got a barely passing grade in. The whole mathematical construct of "prove X using Y,Z lemmas" was really lost on me, I just really wasn't used to thinking that...

          Oh man, Calc I was the one class I got a barely passing grade in. The whole mathematical construct of "prove X using Y,Z lemmas" was really lost on me, I just really wasn't used to thinking that way. I could use calculus well enough, but proving theorems is something I wholeheartedly dislike.
          And Physics II - is that electrodynamics? Yeah, that's a difficult one for first year students simply because we don't have intuition about electricity as we do about mechanics. But if you're a CS student, I wouldn't worry too much about this course. The only tip I would give is focus on mathematical foundations - if you know your calculus, differential math and linear algebra well, you can build a lot on it. The rest is gravy.
          And yes, the shock of going from frontrunner in highschool to struggling in university is very familiar. I'll just say that the first year is always hard, but I trust you'll adjust. It's shitty that you need to worry about the finances of your education instead of your actual education - it adds a whole new layer of stress to an already stressful situation.

          1 vote
    2. [2]
      Comment deleted by author
      Link Parent
      1. Silbern
        Link Parent
        Thanks man, that actually does make me feel better. I'm lucky that I haven't been put on academic probation yet, I've managed to do well in all my other classes but my core math and now physics...

        Thanks man, that actually does make me feel better. I'm lucky that I haven't been put on academic probation yet, I've managed to do well in all my other classes but my core math and now physics one. I've also considered switching programs - I really want to work in IT, I've had a passion for it since I was a kid and I know I'm pretty good at it, and I did really well in my CS classes so far, but it's been the prereqs for math and physics that I've been really struggling with. I've been possibly considering doing something like political science and then acquiring some certifications in IT, and seeing if I can maybe slide my way in. I think for cybersecurity, especially if I did a focus in contemporary east asian politics, that might be a useful skill set. But even so, I know many employers really want to see a STEM degree when they hire people to work in IT, and especially since I think the economy's getting tight, I think it'd be more valuable to get a CS degree. So I gave it some thought and I think I've identified the areas I'm weak in, and I hope to improve on myself for next semester. I tried studying more rigorously and more practice based for my optics exam, and even though I still didn't do so well, I more than doubled my previous exam scores. That's given me a small boost that maybe I'm heading in the right direction.

        But your story's really inspiring though, I can only imagine how amazing it must have felt when you finally got your degree! :) I hope someday I feel similarly if I get mine, although it won't be as impressive as that. If you met with one, what did your academic advisors or councilors think?

        2 votes
  2. [7]
    Bullmaestro
    (edited )
    Link
    Lately I’ve been feeling more down than usual. I feel like I would be writing an entire thesis on my past experiences if I elaborated, but to keep it simple. I am frustrated with my (lack of) sex...

    Lately I’ve been feeling more down than usual.

    I feel like I would be writing an entire thesis on my past experiences if I elaborated, but to keep it simple. I am frustrated with my (lack of) sex life and feel like it’s driving me towards an increasingly resentful and bitter mindset. Most people in their late twenties have had many sexual partners, are in long term relationships and have families of their own. I on the other hand am still a virgin. Society mocks people like me.

    My low mood stems from a series of women I met via dating apps who got me emotionally attached and led me on for weeks, even months before breaking things off.

    I had tried multiple things to improve my outlook: a makeover, a new wardrobe, taking better care of my skin, new dating apps, trying to meet women in person, delving into the law of attraction & Neville Goddard’s teachings (because I thought maybe my world and all of my problems were manifested by my thoughts), meditation and more recently going to the gym 4 times a week in an attempt to improve my physique and get jacked. Yet I feel like my efforts go unnoticed.

    7 votes
    1. [2]
      povey
      Link Parent
      If you love yourself, others will love you, too. You can only control your reactions to what other people do, not the people themselves. Hang in there and live life the way you want to live!

      If you love yourself, others will love you, too. You can only control your reactions to what other people do, not the people themselves. Hang in there and live life the way you want to live!

      3 votes
      1. unknown user
        Link Parent
        What you say is the truest cliche. It sounds like the most simple thing out there, the most obvious, yet it is so hard to do. It took lots of reading philosophy and reflecting for me to achieve...

        What you say is the truest cliche. It sounds like the most simple thing out there, the most obvious, yet it is so hard to do. It took lots of reading philosophy and reflecting for me to achieve this. Self love, self esteem, and the realisation that others are not superior to me let alone perfect were how I saved myself from a depressive youth. Learning to take care of myself and look nice as a young man was useful, but means nothing without these.

        @Bullmaestro Society loves to mock everybody and everything. It forces us to be like "most people". If you're a virgin 20-something that's what you are, and a good woman who is worth your time and attention won't really care. Also, lots of women do like less experienced guys.

        3 votes
    2. Tygrak
      Link Parent
      Hey, I feel you, although I am gay so I don't want a woman, but otherwise I exactly understand what you mean. It feels like all my friends are in awesome relationships, and of course that's not...

      Hey, I feel you, although I am gay so I don't want a woman, but otherwise I exactly understand what you mean. It feels like all my friends are in awesome relationships, and of course that's not really the truth and they have problems too, it really doesn't feel like it haha. Dating apps are so terrible, I wish I got rid of them. But they are like the only hope I have to find someone, because I don't meet that many people to find a gay guy who would like me naturally. I definitely didn't put in as much effort as you did in improving yourself, so I think you will hopefully find someone sooner rather than later. Gotta stay hopeful, don't stop believing and so on, it kind of is a numbers game after all :).

      3 votes
    3. [3]
      Gaywallet
      Link Parent
      The podcast "Strangers" had a series of episodes titled "Love Hurts" which chronicle a woman in her 40s back in the dating pool again, and I found it particularly cathartic. Modern dating apps...

      The podcast "Strangers" had a series of episodes titled "Love Hurts" which chronicle a woman in her 40s back in the dating pool again, and I found it particularly cathartic.

      Modern dating apps suck, this is a universal agreement. I think you're taking the right steps, but make sure to pay attention to your own mental health as well. The gym will help with that, but don't be afraid of finding a therapist or counselor especially if you need to work through what sounds like some depression.

      2 votes
      1. [2]
        Bullmaestro
        Link Parent
        I've seen three different doctors about bouts of depression I had in the past. One refused to offer any kind of treatment and just told me to stop consuming caffeine. Another told me to find...

        I've seen three different doctors about bouts of depression I had in the past. One refused to offer any kind of treatment and just told me to stop consuming caffeine. Another told me to find another job (which my previous employer used as an excuse to fire me.) A third referred me to a non-profit that could only offer me two blocks of art therapy sessions that didn't do much for me.

        Apparently the waiting list to see a therapist on the NHS is astronomical so my best bet would be to go private... which would cost me about £40 - £50 per session.

        3 votes
        1. Gaywallet
          Link Parent
          The process of trying to get treated for depression sounds depressing. I'm sorry you have to go through that. Can you afford to go private? It might seem like a lot of money, but what is money for...

          The process of trying to get treated for depression sounds depressing. I'm sorry you have to go through that. Can you afford to go private? It might seem like a lot of money, but what is money for if not for attempting to buy happiness with it?

          3 votes
  3. [2]
    mat
    Link
    I am going to continue toddler-proofing the house, which is turning out to be a hilarious/horribly stressful game of whack-a-mole with my son constantly finding new and exciting ways to hurt...

    I am going to continue toddler-proofing the house, which is turning out to be a hilarious/horribly stressful game of whack-a-mole with my son constantly finding new and exciting ways to hurt himself.

    I will try to work off the calories eaten after having visitors all weekend, and get back at least a little closer to my 100km/week cycling goal. Not much in the grand scheme of things but I have long-term musculoskeletal problems so am very limited in what I can do physically. I am getting slowly better though - more bike time is helpful, but I have to be physically capable of doing it. It's a bit of vicious cycle (ahem).

    Attempt to convince my soft tissue therapist to accept a barter payment system. I don't have much money because the amount of work I can do is limited (same reasons as my cycling is) but she likes my jewellery designs so I suspect this might work. I can manage to make a couple of pieces a week for her in exchange for a few hours of physical therapy. She is a friend as well, I don't just go around asking random healthcare practitioners if they'll accept shiny metal in lieu of cash!

    If I'm not hurting too much and the baby sleeps, which he is getting better at, I'd like to get a few hours of Divinity: Original Sin 2, which was recommended to me by someone on here and I'm very much enjoying.

    6 votes
    1. xstresedg
      Link Parent
      Fun times in Toddler High? Hahaha, I'm sure my bestie and his wife will be doing that more, soon. As for the exercise, I hope you can get back to on the horse...er...bicycle! ...wait, isn't some...

      Fun times in Toddler High? Hahaha, I'm sure my bestie and his wife will be doing that more, soon.

      As for the exercise, I hope you can get back to on the horse...er...bicycle!

      ...wait, isn't some cash just shiny metal? ;)

      1 vote
  4. moriarty
    Link
    I'm going to be fighting my identity thief this week! My car was broken into 6 months ago and the burglar retrieved some documents from it with which he has been making my life a living hell....

    I'm going to be fighting my identity thief this week!
    My car was broken into 6 months ago and the burglar retrieved some documents from it with which he has been making my life a living hell. Daily applications for loans, car purchases, he keeps calling and unfreezing my credit in all 3 bureaus, forcing me to write and call and appeal each and every time this happens. He actually printed a copy of my driver's license with his photo on it and has been using it online and all around town, using spoofed phone numbers, fake addresses and two email addresses he's made in my name. I have his IP address. The police has even intercepted a bank letter to one of his fake addresses with a credit card in my name.

    Then, finally, he made a mistake.
    Early last week I got an email from an online lawyer service offering their services in my legal case. This must be a scam, I thought, I have no legal cases against me. Went and checked the county court records, and there it was - I am being sued. It seems like this guy has started a business in my (rather unique) name about two weeks after my car was broken into (turns out you don't need any form of ID for this!). Looking at the court case record, "my" company and a second individual are being sued for a car that individual purchased but defaulted on his loan. That individual claims this company, towed his car and is in possession of it. Clearly trying to avoid repossession by making up a fake tow company (I drove to its address - it's a house) and letting it take the fall.
    But at least now I had a name. I did some digging and it seems like this guy has a rap sheet with at least 30 cases, going back to the 90s. Out of which, 4 separate cases are for identity theft in which he was convicted and served 3 years in jail.
    It gets better - he has just been arrested 4 days prior for burglary and possession of meth and has a warrant for his arrest for reckless driving in the neighboring county. His arraignment hearing was today and I went there to watch. Massive facial hair aside, it looks like the same person as the fake ID he made. Planning to write it all down in a long letter, attach all my documentation and give it to the police in hope they will be a little more cooperative in pursuing him now.
    With this, I think I have officially transitioned from a Moriarty to a Holmes.

    6 votes
  5. Gaywallet
    Link
    Given that this was posted on a Monday, I'm just going to treat the entirety of the upcoming weekend as part of this week. I don't really have much planned for the weekdays. I might try and...

    Given that this was posted on a Monday, I'm just going to treat the entirety of the upcoming weekend as part of this week.

    I don't really have much planned for the weekdays. I might try and schedule a date or two. I'm enough over my sickness that I'll probably try and lift a bit, but I'm not sure how much. I may try to get in a shortish hike while the weather isn't too oppressively hot.

    This weekend is SF pride. So far I have a play party lined up on Saturday night and I'm walking in the parade on Sunday afternoon with my employer (yay corporate take-over of pride 🙄).

    I think I need to find a hobby other than lifting. I haven't found myself very interested in video games lately and being social tends to be expensive. I was thinking music, perhaps piano since they are fairly ubiquitous and I played it for a few years in my childhood, but I dunno. I also think it might be fun to mix some EDM as I really enjoy raving.

    5 votes
  6. Aflean
    Link
    Hopefully getting more settled in Manjaro and shifting slightly away from Windows. As well as getting through the last week of school before the six weeks of summer fun!

    Hopefully getting more settled in Manjaro and shifting slightly away from Windows. As well as getting through the last week of school before the six weeks of summer fun!

    4 votes
  7. ali
    Link
    I am working with some people on a new project. We have a bus with which we drive to different schools/events and we teach kids/anyone really how to work with technology. A big focus is also...

    I am working with some people on a new project. We have a bus with which we drive to different schools/events and we teach kids/anyone really how to work with technology. A big focus is also teaching how to program. The best thing is: thanks to our sponsor, we can offer all of that for free to everyone wanting to learn.

    What we do is drive with a Mercedes sprinter and blow up a huge bubble in which we then teach. But we have a crazy heatwave in Germany at the moment, so being in the bubble was very exhausting today. Today was our maiden voyage, and it turned out pretty good. I’m very excited for this project, our sponsor (I didn’t start this project, I’m just one of the main teachers ) enables us to have a 3D printer and laser cutter and everything on board. It’s seriously a great opportunity for everyone involved. I can share more if anyone is curious.

    3 votes
  8. unknown user
    Link
    Myself and my business partner have found a second unique application we'd like to develop in tandem with our initial plan. There's many similarities with our first application however, so I'm...

    Myself and my business partner have found a second unique application we'd like to develop in tandem with our initial plan. There's many similarities with our first application however, so I'm spending the week abstracting our multi-tenanted authentication system into a shared package that each application can harness.

    I'm starting to think multi-tenancy auth is the hardest problem of this whole system. I've decided to go with single-db, multi-tenant for "simplicity" and then scoping queries to an organization at one higher level than the business logic.

    I don't see how multiple-db, single-tenant applications can scale effectively, especially when they depend on managed database hosting services. The cost would be enormous.

    3 votes
  9. unknown user
    Link
    Not much except I have to book flights/trains/hotels for a few stays at Izmir and Ankara for exams and interviews for my MA. Hopefully I'll get it sorted with one of these schools and be done with...

    Not much except I have to book flights/trains/hotels for a few stays at Izmir and Ankara for exams and interviews for my MA. Hopefully I'll get it sorted with one of these schools and be done with this thing. If I fail all these this summer, I might take a long break from this stuff and go earn me some money for a couple years at a full time job. Or else I might end up hating my dream career.

    I am also going back to a pen-and-paper planner. The mobile solutions do not satisfy me, and even if I had a very portable laptop, dealing with one on the go is inconvenient. I find I'm more productive this way anyways. So I just went and bought a couple notebooks, and used one to set up a bullet journal. Copied most stuff over, but some stuff does remain. I'll have to sort that out and then disable some relevant configuration in Emacs and Syncthing maybe.

    An idea that I'm entertaining is learning Wordpress development. I hear there still is decent money in it. Had a couple book translation interviews and they pay in peanut crumbles. IDK if I want to bother study that or just teach foreign languages somewhere, I want something that makes decent enough money that I don't fully depend on student loans and one that does not leave me completely exhausted after work.

    2 votes
  10. xstresedg
    Link
    Attempted Elliott Hulse's five-day fasting challenge but failed at the end of Monday. However, that failure came with its own success in that I fasted for 24.5 hours (see: 12h digest, 12.5h...

    Attempted Elliott Hulse's five-day fasting challenge but failed at the end of Monday. However, that failure came with its own success in that I fasted for 24.5 hours (see: 12h digest, 12.5h fasting). Today, I'm doing a 20-4 fast, and so far I'm on track. 20-4 is much easier, especially after a 24.5 hour fast haha.

    Pizza to break my fast tonight, with the partner.

    GameDev hopefully tomorrow night. I haven't touched it in a while, and I have an idea I want to throw at my HUD (when pressing a key, the key lights up on the hud). I would also be looking to make this an optional feature, meaning introducing an Options menu. So, I'm kinda pumped, tbh.

    Thursday is a mystery day, as it's my partner's day off, so likely the evening will be spent with her.

    Friday night, Saturday and Sunday afternoon, they're all up for grabs as she is working the evening shift on all of those days. Likely will be seeing her Sat/Sun morning though before she goes to work.

    Otherwise, I'm working or sleeping haha

    1 vote