Today I bough some duct tape

What a magnificent purchase.

I fixed the saddle on my bike and now it’s less saddle than duct tape.

I was so mesmerized I took it cycling with me, and stopped near the road to put some tape on the handlebar.

It looked neat, sharp, complete.

When I got home I told my husband about my duct tape, and all the little things I could use it for.

He was not very enthusiastic, so I shut his mouth. With duct tape.

I then shut his nostrils and made his head into a cute little football.

It looked neat, sharp, complete.

He wiggled back and forth. It was adorable for a while. And then he stopped.

I need to buy some duct tape.