About 60% - 70% of people with low mood find it responds well to cognitive behaviour therapy. If you can work from books you may find "Mind Over Mood" useful. If you prefer face to face therapy...
About 60% - 70% of people with low mood find it responds well to cognitive behaviour therapy.
If you can work from books you may find "Mind Over Mood" useful.
If you prefer face to face therapy look for someone who has a registration and some experience who uses a CBT model. CBT lasts up to 16 weeks, although many people need fewer sessions.
Hey, this might not help you much but I just wanted to say I was in the exact same situation you were in in my last year of college (3 years ago). I now finished college and am kind of aimlessly...
Hey, this might not help you much but I just wanted to say I was in the exact same situation you were in in my last year of college (3 years ago). I now finished college and am kind of aimlessly trying to do my job which I should be passionate about (it's literally in my field of study which I still know I love) yet find little motivation for. I also am trying to self-study but once again I fall off really easily because I lose motivation for it. I spend most of my day on the computer bored and doing nothing, yet internally I reject doing something about it.
I don't know who or what to turn to for help either. It's been 3 years since I graduated, and things aren't getting better, but if there's something I could have said to myself from 3 years ago it's to ask for help, from anyone, especially a therapist if I could afford one, so that's also what I'm gonna say to you.
Don't take this as me being alarmist of course, I just don't want you to get caught up in a cycle similar to mine, and I think the best way to do that is seeking help from someone who understands what may be going on in your head and can guide you through recovery.
In any case, I hope you can feel better in the future. :)
I'll add a bit of perspective from someone who is in the exact same boat as you but is on the "next step" (so to speak) in the process of trying to regain some of that passion. I'm a software...
I'll add a bit of perspective from someone who is in the exact same boat as you but is on the "next step" (so to speak) in the process of trying to regain some of that passion.
I'm a software engineer by trade—and I love what I do—but I struggled to find the creative energy to engage myself while working on behalf of someone else. I'm young and have no dependents, I'm not going to spend my best years stuck inside on days when I can be out paragliding & hiking in one of the most beautiful places on Earth.
At least for me, the obvious solution was to quit my day job and direct my creative energy onto something that is my own—so myself and my paragliding instructor started a software business. It's not earning any money yet, and we're ~6 months away from having something that will start generating revenue, but as long as you believe in yourself, and believe in what you're crafting—software engineers are nothing more than artists whose canvas happens to be a text editor—it's easy to find happiness.
I worked full time during my degree, which was a struggle, but allowed me to save up significant sums of money to execute the vision we're working on now.
I can brew a coffee, sit down, and work when I want, for a varying amount of time per week, pick and choose the best days to take a break and go flying; and the only person I answer to is myself & my internal compass on where our product needs to go. Worrying about whether the product will generate revenue is something I'm trying my best to avoid for now, as it's not productive, and is a results-driven model of thinking. I try to focus on the process and hopefully the results will speak for themselves.
And if it doesn't work out, then what's really the worst that can happen? I go back to working for someone else, which I would've already been doing anyway! It's a bit of a cliche, but you only live once, and I want to build something that is my own, that I'm proud of, and craft my own direction instead of following someone else.
Hopefully you can find something to direct your passion into that you feel proud of :)
You show a clear contradiction between your external conditions and your emotional life. Sadness in the face of tragedy is a normal reaction. But when our brain is sick, it doesn't need a reason...
I feel chronically lonely and low
I do have a handful of friends I see regularly here
And yet something doesn't feel right.
You show a clear contradiction between your external conditions and your emotional life. Sadness in the face of tragedy is a normal reaction. But when our brain is sick, it doesn't need a reason for sadness.
Those are signs of a possible mental illness or psychological condition, and the only sane advice I have for you is to seek professional help.
IDK the exact figures but what @DanBC said is probably right.
You should absolutely seek a psychotherapist, who might refer you to a psychiatrist if deemed necessary. You can also go straight to a psychiatrist if you want.
Maybe your university provide such mental health aide for students?
Ah, I forgot to mention where I got the figures from and it is a useful point. So, to provide a bit of context for those figures I'm using information from England's IAPT (Improving Access to...
Ah, I forgot to mention where I got the figures from and it is a useful point.
So, to provide a bit of context for those figures I'm using information from England's IAPT (Improving Access to Psychological Therapies) scheme.
IAPT is usually a CBT model, but not always. That's paid for by the NHS, so treatment is free. People can self refer. They get access to a therapist. But importantly it is a "stepped model". Some people will have one-to-one sessions with an experienced therapist and they'll have up to 12 sessions. But that's the highest tier available on IAPT. Other people will be in group sessions, or telephone only sessions. Other people will have self-help from computers or books. I believe (although I don't know what the research is) that these lower tiers "drag down" the efficacy of IAPT.
So when I say about 60% I am only referring to this IAPT scheme, and maybe the results are better if we only include people who have one-to-one work with an experienced therapist.
To play an armchair psychiatrist, I think one thing could be that as you are in your final year of studies, you are, even if only subconsciously, apprehensive about what will happen after you...
To play an armchair psychiatrist, I think one thing could be that as you are in your final year of studies, you are, even if only subconsciously, apprehensive about what will happen after you graduate, and that feeds into what you are feeling. Graduation will be a big identity change for you. You are no longer a student, but will now be facing the "real world", and depending on your age, adulthood. As a student, everything has felt possible ("I can always switch my subject if I don't like it") and you have also had the guiding hand of the educational system for 20 or so years telling you what to do next. But after you graduate, you are suddenly in the driver's seat, with no clear objectives. And at the same time, things may also seem very final: is this what you really want to be doing for the rest of your life? Will you find your place in the world? Is what you have studied relevant for "real life"?
Rest assured, most of us have gone through that. And all of us have found our places. In fact, most of us have had multiple places, some of which have had nothing to do with what we have studied. You'll find your way.
You also mention living abroad and whether the novelty of that may have worn off. As someone who has lived in a couple of different countries, and known many others who have done the same, I can say that at least based on my personal and totally anecdotal experience there definitely is a point, or actually multiple points, when you hit low points and question what you are doing. It too is a question of an evolving personal identity.
I don't know how long you have lived abroad or why you moved, but after the initial excitement of moving to a country, which for me lasts about half a year, people tend to get to a place where things are no longer exotic and every day no longer constitutes a brand new and exciting challenge. You now know how to do your groceries, how to order in a restaurant, how to do your taxes, and so on. You have developed a routine. Everyday life is no longer a non-stop adventure. This can be depressing, as you have become addicted to the excitement.
After the first year and a half or two years, you have also started to acclimatise, quite literally, as the weather and seasons no longer feel weird. It can be a surprisingly big thing psychologically.
But at least you are still exciting, because you are a (or even "the") foreigner. You stick out. A few years later, this starts to change too. You have come to understand the culture and the language (if different from yours) to a level where you know what is going around you, both on an immediate as well as a social level. You can no longer really feel like an outsider. Or special. And this can affect you.
Some years after that, there is a point that can be even harder to process. Up until then, whenever you boarded an airplane or a train to take you back to your original country, and heard your mother tongue (or your home dialect) being spoken by other passengers, you felt like you were going home. But at one point, you realise that this has reversed: now, you get the "I'm going home feeling" when you board the return flight and hear the language of the country in which you now live. Your adopted country has become your home. This can again be a tough idea to deal with. It starts to destroy the last vestiges of your detachment, those last excuses you may have had that you have used to justify yourself for not caring about social or other problems in the country that you live in.
And so it goes. Little by little, your adopted country swallows you. It can be suffocating, particularly if one of your reasons for moving there was to look for something new and exciting, or to leave the old and boring behind. And even if it wasn't, you were still "special" when you moved in, but now you are just part of the furniture.
But of course you aren't. Throughout your journey, you are still you, and you are a much richer you than you were when you originally moved in, thanks to all the experiences. Embrace that. And evaluate whether it is that excitement of the exotic that you are craving for, which no longer exists on the same level. If so, ask yourself if you really need it, or why you need it.
My final, and again totally anecdotal, suggestion is to consider if you are getting enough exercise and eating well. The older you get, the more things like your metabolism will change, and your body will work differently from how you are used to it working. There comes a time, surprisingly early in your life, and often around the time many people are graduating, when you need to start taking active care of your body, while keeping in mind that also your brain is a part of that corporeal unit. At least for me, the older I get, the more exercise and diet affect my mood. And it is also a pretty vicious circle. If I skip exercise or eat poorly, in less than a week I find myself in a pretty low place mentally. And the deeper I fall, the more difficult it is to climb back up and motivate myself to exercise and eat better. But once I push myself back into a healthier routine, the brain pretty quickly becomes far less murky, the problems appear smaller, and life in general much more enjoyable.
Again, all of this is just my personal experiences. Your mileage will vary.
About 60% - 70% of people with low mood find it responds well to cognitive behaviour therapy.
If you can work from books you may find "Mind Over Mood" useful.
If you prefer face to face therapy look for someone who has a registration and some experience who uses a CBT model. CBT lasts up to 16 weeks, although many people need fewer sessions.
Hey, this might not help you much but I just wanted to say I was in the exact same situation you were in in my last year of college (3 years ago). I now finished college and am kind of aimlessly trying to do my job which I should be passionate about (it's literally in my field of study which I still know I love) yet find little motivation for. I also am trying to self-study but once again I fall off really easily because I lose motivation for it. I spend most of my day on the computer bored and doing nothing, yet internally I reject doing something about it.
I don't know who or what to turn to for help either. It's been 3 years since I graduated, and things aren't getting better, but if there's something I could have said to myself from 3 years ago it's to ask for help, from anyone, especially a therapist if I could afford one, so that's also what I'm gonna say to you.
Don't take this as me being alarmist of course, I just don't want you to get caught up in a cycle similar to mine, and I think the best way to do that is seeking help from someone who understands what may be going on in your head and can guide you through recovery.
In any case, I hope you can feel better in the future. :)
I'll add a bit of perspective from someone who is in the exact same boat as you but is on the "next step" (so to speak) in the process of trying to regain some of that passion.
I'm a software engineer by trade—and I love what I do—but I struggled to find the creative energy to engage myself while working on behalf of someone else. I'm young and have no dependents, I'm not going to spend my best years stuck inside on days when I can be out paragliding & hiking in one of the most beautiful places on Earth.
At least for me, the obvious solution was to quit my day job and direct my creative energy onto something that is my own—so myself and my paragliding instructor started a software business. It's not earning any money yet, and we're ~6 months away from having something that will start generating revenue, but as long as you believe in yourself, and believe in what you're crafting—software engineers are nothing more than artists whose canvas happens to be a text editor—it's easy to find happiness.
I worked full time during my degree, which was a struggle, but allowed me to save up significant sums of money to execute the vision we're working on now.
I can brew a coffee, sit down, and work when I want, for a varying amount of time per week, pick and choose the best days to take a break and go flying; and the only person I answer to is myself & my internal compass on where our product needs to go. Worrying about whether the product will generate revenue is something I'm trying my best to avoid for now, as it's not productive, and is a results-driven model of thinking. I try to focus on the process and hopefully the results will speak for themselves.
And if it doesn't work out, then what's really the worst that can happen? I go back to working for someone else, which I would've already been doing anyway! It's a bit of a cliche, but you only live once, and I want to build something that is my own, that I'm proud of, and craft my own direction instead of following someone else.
Hopefully you can find something to direct your passion into that you feel proud of :)
You show a clear contradiction between your external conditions and your emotional life. Sadness in the face of tragedy is a normal reaction. But when our brain is sick, it doesn't need a reason for sadness.
Those are signs of a possible mental illness or psychological condition, and the only sane advice I have for you is to seek professional help.
IDK the exact figures but what @DanBC said is probably right.
You should absolutely seek a psychotherapist, who might refer you to a psychiatrist if deemed necessary. You can also go straight to a psychiatrist if you want.
Maybe your university provide such mental health aide for students?
Either way, don't fight this alone.
Ah, I forgot to mention where I got the figures from and it is a useful point.
So, to provide a bit of context for those figures I'm using information from England's IAPT (Improving Access to Psychological Therapies) scheme.
IAPT is usually a CBT model, but not always. That's paid for by the NHS, so treatment is free. People can self refer. They get access to a therapist. But importantly it is a "stepped model". Some people will have one-to-one sessions with an experienced therapist and they'll have up to 12 sessions. But that's the highest tier available on IAPT. Other people will be in group sessions, or telephone only sessions. Other people will have self-help from computers or books. I believe (although I don't know what the research is) that these lower tiers "drag down" the efficacy of IAPT.
So when I say about 60% I am only referring to this IAPT scheme, and maybe the results are better if we only include people who have one-to-one work with an experienced therapist.
The numbers are here: https://digital.nhs.uk/data-and-information/publications/statistical/psychological-therapies-report-on-the-use-of-iapt-services
To play an armchair psychiatrist, I think one thing could be that as you are in your final year of studies, you are, even if only subconsciously, apprehensive about what will happen after you graduate, and that feeds into what you are feeling. Graduation will be a big identity change for you. You are no longer a student, but will now be facing the "real world", and depending on your age, adulthood. As a student, everything has felt possible ("I can always switch my subject if I don't like it") and you have also had the guiding hand of the educational system for 20 or so years telling you what to do next. But after you graduate, you are suddenly in the driver's seat, with no clear objectives. And at the same time, things may also seem very final: is this what you really want to be doing for the rest of your life? Will you find your place in the world? Is what you have studied relevant for "real life"?
Rest assured, most of us have gone through that. And all of us have found our places. In fact, most of us have had multiple places, some of which have had nothing to do with what we have studied. You'll find your way.
You also mention living abroad and whether the novelty of that may have worn off. As someone who has lived in a couple of different countries, and known many others who have done the same, I can say that at least based on my personal and totally anecdotal experience there definitely is a point, or actually multiple points, when you hit low points and question what you are doing. It too is a question of an evolving personal identity.
I don't know how long you have lived abroad or why you moved, but after the initial excitement of moving to a country, which for me lasts about half a year, people tend to get to a place where things are no longer exotic and every day no longer constitutes a brand new and exciting challenge. You now know how to do your groceries, how to order in a restaurant, how to do your taxes, and so on. You have developed a routine. Everyday life is no longer a non-stop adventure. This can be depressing, as you have become addicted to the excitement.
After the first year and a half or two years, you have also started to acclimatise, quite literally, as the weather and seasons no longer feel weird. It can be a surprisingly big thing psychologically.
But at least you are still exciting, because you are a (or even "the") foreigner. You stick out. A few years later, this starts to change too. You have come to understand the culture and the language (if different from yours) to a level where you know what is going around you, both on an immediate as well as a social level. You can no longer really feel like an outsider. Or special. And this can affect you.
Some years after that, there is a point that can be even harder to process. Up until then, whenever you boarded an airplane or a train to take you back to your original country, and heard your mother tongue (or your home dialect) being spoken by other passengers, you felt like you were going home. But at one point, you realise that this has reversed: now, you get the "I'm going home feeling" when you board the return flight and hear the language of the country in which you now live. Your adopted country has become your home. This can again be a tough idea to deal with. It starts to destroy the last vestiges of your detachment, those last excuses you may have had that you have used to justify yourself for not caring about social or other problems in the country that you live in.
And so it goes. Little by little, your adopted country swallows you. It can be suffocating, particularly if one of your reasons for moving there was to look for something new and exciting, or to leave the old and boring behind. And even if it wasn't, you were still "special" when you moved in, but now you are just part of the furniture.
But of course you aren't. Throughout your journey, you are still you, and you are a much richer you than you were when you originally moved in, thanks to all the experiences. Embrace that. And evaluate whether it is that excitement of the exotic that you are craving for, which no longer exists on the same level. If so, ask yourself if you really need it, or why you need it.
My final, and again totally anecdotal, suggestion is to consider if you are getting enough exercise and eating well. The older you get, the more things like your metabolism will change, and your body will work differently from how you are used to it working. There comes a time, surprisingly early in your life, and often around the time many people are graduating, when you need to start taking active care of your body, while keeping in mind that also your brain is a part of that corporeal unit. At least for me, the older I get, the more exercise and diet affect my mood. And it is also a pretty vicious circle. If I skip exercise or eat poorly, in less than a week I find myself in a pretty low place mentally. And the deeper I fall, the more difficult it is to climb back up and motivate myself to exercise and eat better. But once I push myself back into a healthier routine, the brain pretty quickly becomes far less murky, the problems appear smaller, and life in general much more enjoyable.
Again, all of this is just my personal experiences. Your mileage will vary.