Hello friends! I'm interviewing with a company in Montreal, which is across the country from where I live now. I want to be able to answer questions about relocating, and to sound like I have somewhat of a plan. I don't want to come across as ill-prepared? So, I've been trying to do some research on renting, flights, interview questions, etc.

Even if I don't get this job, I still think might try to move out East one day. Do you have any words of wisdom that might help me make this dream a reality?

(EDIT: I'll try to respond to people asap, but the interview is on Monday so I'm trying to frantically prepare, heh. That's my biggest priority... I really want to impress them, hah.)

Semi-throwaway cause you'll see.

I used to know my way around dating. I felt some control over my projected image. Witty yet humble, respectful yet naughty, interesting yet safe. Just the right amount. I made no promises, but relationships were never of the table — and I had quite a few. I was frank, true and kind. Telling the truth about my intentions was both liberating and effective. Ladies liked it.

Maybe that's a consequence of age, but the shtick is not working anymore. Most women my age (and in my location) seem to expect someone more "mature", someone to marry with, or at least someone that is willing to become a father figure for their children. IDK. But I'm not that guy. Going after younger women is a double-edged sword since I'll have to deal with growing pains I have long left behind. And it's not like they're too interested in me anyway. I refuse to believe that marriage and fatherhood are necessary steps for maturity, but sometimes this seems like an inevitability. And it's not like I blame women for wanting that: it's within their right to want whatever suits them. And I want their company. I just don't want to participate in the big project.

I do not believe in marriage, the same way I do not invest in any large project with such a slim chance of success (and for me divorce is only one of many ways a marriage can fail). I absolutely do not judge anyone who chooses to become married, but it's not for me.

So hence the question: how to date when you're pushing forty?

If you're giving thoughtful gifts that people will actually want, and that aren't just future landfill clutter, great. Making things by hand, awesome. But that's not what this season is to most people. It's about "I have to buy you something". I've been saying for years it's bad enough to receive thoughtless clutter to be in my way - buying someone a meaningless gift is essentially saying "let me make your home slightly smaller" - real thoughtful of you.

But it's 2019. The oceans are full of plastic and dying. The air is toxic from making it, transporting it to the stores, and burning it when you're done with it. We don't need more SHIT, and yet let's be honest, for all the big talk online about people caring, the clutter and plastic season seems to get worse every year. I still get laughed at(at best) and called all kinds of negative things when I say I don't want clutter imposed on me, and if you absolutely can't live with the idea of not spending money on me, give it to charity. I still get looked at like the cheapskate weirdo when I give something handmade, even when it's something well made and would have financial value(I'm a skilled woodworker and cook; if I make you something, it's NOT crap). But it wasn't expensive at the store so it's less acceptable somehow.

Over the next week or so, friends, family, coworkers, and clients are going to continue to do the exact opposite of what I've clearly expressed, help kill the planet in doing so, and call me a monster for not gushing with praise and gratitude for it. And many/most/all of you are in the same boat. What do we do to get through to people that just don't get it that useless clutter is not welcome, and the planet doesn't need more disposable junk?

Part 1: https://gimletmedia.com/shows/reply-all/llhd33/152-the-real-enemy-part-1

Part 2: https://gimletmedia.com/shows/reply-all/94hwe43/153-the-real-enemy-part-2

Part 3: https://gimletmedia.com/shows/reply-all/j4hl3vj/154-the-real-enemy-part-3