kfwyre's recent activity

  1. Comment on How the founder’s toxic culture tore apart Fullbright, the studio behind Gone Home in ~games

    kfwyre
    Link Parent
    This feels very dismissive to me, and even somewhat selectively quoted. The sentence before that in the article is: And it's followed by a direct quote from a former employee: I think there's...

    Some of the former female staffers said they often worried about how Gaynor characterized them to other employees.

    Well okay, I'm worried about a lot of things; everyone has this kind of general "social anxiety" from time to time. Sometimes it's justified, a lot of times it's not. The question is, is this actually the case? Did he actually do this? Or is it just reporting on people's social anxieties that we all have? Just because you feel something does not make this true.

    This feels very dismissive to me, and even somewhat selectively quoted. The sentence before that in the article is:

    This was compounded, they said, by Gaynor’s tendency to disparage and discredit the contributions of female staffers in particular, oftentimes directly to leadership.

    And it's followed by a direct quote from a former employee:

    “His go-to weapon was to laugh at people’s opinions and embarrass them in front of other people.”

    I think there's enough here that we can say that the women's anxiety was a real thing happening for real reasons.

    8 votes
  2. Comment on What was the last game you played that really surprised you? in ~games

    kfwyre
    Link Parent
    You didn’t miss it! I added it in after reading your comment. :)

    You didn’t miss it! I added it in after reading your comment. :)

    3 votes
  3. Comment on What was the last game you played that really surprised you? in ~games

    kfwyre
    Link Parent
    I added a copy/pasteable block to the main thread if you (or anyone else) wants to use it. Don’t feel obligated to, but I thought I’d offer because, like you said, it really is a pain to type on...

    but I honestly can never remember the syntax for spoilers and it's a pain to type in mobile

    I added a copy/pasteable block to the main thread if you (or anyone else) wants to use it. Don’t feel obligated to, but I thought I’d offer because, like you said, it really is a pain to type on mobile.

    2 votes
  4. Comment on What was the last game you played that really surprised you? in ~games

    kfwyre
    Link Parent
    The Witness Details That stands as one of my favorite gaming moments of all time. I still get goosebumps just thinking about it. The “HOLY SHIT”-ness of the realization was so incredibly powerful....

    The Witness

    Details

    That stands as one of my favorite gaming moments of all time. I still get goosebumps just thinking about it. The “HOLY SHIT”-ness of the realization was so incredibly powerful.

    I discovered it late at night, right before I was about to end my session and go to bed. It made me WAY too jazzed to sleep, and I instead spent the next two hours running frantically around the island, seeing all of its familiar sights with brand new eyes.

    It was truly an incredible gaming moment. I’m so glad I didn’t have it spoiled for me.

    3 votes
  5. Comment on How has the pandemic changed you? in ~talk

    kfwyre
    Link Parent
    I am, sorry I forgot to mention it in my post (some good ol’ American arrogance I showed there, assuming everyone should automatically know!). Thanks for your empathy and support.

    I am, sorry I forgot to mention it in my post (some good ol’ American arrogance I showed there, assuming everyone should automatically know!). Thanks for your empathy and support.

    1 vote
  6. What was the last game you played that really surprised you?

    “Surprise” can be anything from an unexpected plot twist to a novel mechanic to simply liking a game you weren’t expecting to like. What surprised you about the game, and why? Please mark any...

    “Surprise” can be anything from an unexpected plot twist to a novel mechanic to simply liking a game you weren’t expecting to like.

    What surprised you about the game, and why?

    Please mark any spoilers. Code below:

    <details>
    <summary>[Game Title] Spoilers</summary>
    
    [Spoiler text goes here]
    </details>
    

    Results:

    [Game Title] Spoilers

    [Spoiler text goes here]

    18 votes
  7. How do you distinguish between masculinity and toxic masculinity?

    This has been a thread I’ve wanted to make for a while but I’ve hesitated to for fear of it going badly. Recent events, however, have made me think it’s a topic that’s we can’t really afford to...

    This has been a thread I’ve wanted to make for a while but I’ve hesitated to for fear of it going badly. Recent events, however, have made me think it’s a topic that’s we can’t really afford to ignore.

    When people read the phrase “toxic masculinity”, some see a clear collection of bad behaviors or mindsets that exist independent of men as a whole, while some see an indictment of an entire gender or identity. I’ve talked to men who have admitted to not knowing how to be masculine without being “toxic”because they can’t see a clear line where one ends and the other begins.

    Thus, I’m interested in exploring what specifically gets defined as “toxic masculinity” and how we distinguish it from neutral or positive masculinity.

    Part of what has kept me from asking this is that I see in people here two different experiences that I fear might collide in bad ways. I know we have people here (myself included) who have been directly harmed by behaviors and mindsets that would fall under the umbrella of “toxic masculinity”. Likewise, I know we have people here who have been harmed by an over-application of the phrase — being seen or treated as “toxic” simply for being men and thus being denied the dignity of their own identity. Giving credence to one experience can feel like it overrides the other.

    Even just the phrase itself is the kind of thing that often divides people into camps and causes conflict, and I’m hoping we can avoid that here. (Though, to be honest, Tildes always impresses me with how we handle difficult topics, so I’m not sure where my worry is coming from). My goal for this topic is for everyone to have the opportunity to speak openly to convey understood truths and lived experiences in ways that maintain dignity for everyone involved.

    The guiding question is about distinguishing masculinity from toxic masculinity, but answers don’t have to be limited to that. I’m interested in hearing about people’s relationship with masculinity in general, both in people who identify with it and those who don’t.

    28 votes
  8. Comment on On Divorce in ~life

    kfwyre
    Link
    I don’t have anything to say beyond how much I continue to admire you for your honesty and transparency. Thank you for sharing your story with us. I hope you are able to heal and find the...

    I don’t have anything to say beyond how much I continue to admire you for your honesty and transparency. Thank you for sharing your story with us. I hope you are able to heal and find the happiness and peace you deserve.

    4 votes
  9. Comment on Speedruns for Trans Liberation charity marathon begins today, July 30 in ~lgbt

    kfwyre
    Link
    I'm a bit late for a wrap-up post, but the marathon was a huge success, especially for it being a first-time event. There were tons of great runs throughout, and they raised a whopping $32,000 USD...

    I'm a bit late for a wrap-up post, but the marathon was a huge success, especially for it being a first-time event. There were tons of great runs throughout, and they raised a whopping $32,000 USD for the Transgender Law Center!

    The original goal for the marathon was only $1,000, which got met very early on. They then increased the goal multiple times over the course of the marathon, ending finally with a $15,000 goal. That goal got met during the penultimate run, Celeste, which is the perfect fit for the event, being both an amazing speed game and a game with a canon trans protagonist.

    That was cool enough, but then things got downright amazing. After clearing the 15K goal with a total of $15,027, Maddy Thorson, lead dev of Celeste, MATCHED the total, dropping a whopping $15,027 donation and doubling the total to over 30K. It was a fantastic moment in a great event.

    3 votes
  10. Comment on How has the pandemic changed you? in ~talk

    kfwyre
    (edited )
    Link Parent
    Anyone who has read my posts here for a while knows that I've been going through a long-term reckoning about my career choice as a teacher. There was a period of time, well before COVID, where I...

    Anyone who has read my posts here for a while knows that I've been going through a long-term reckoning about my career choice as a teacher. There was a period of time, well before COVID, where I actively made the decision to leave it and was looking for alternatives.

    Doing that helped me to understand that much of what I dislike about education isn't specifically linked to education but is more a product of modern employment. COVID also, interestingly enough, brought focus to some of the positives of my job: it's recession-proof, it's certainly never boring, and I'm doing something that I consider meaningful and good on a daily basis. My husband and I were able to be comfortable financially throughout the pandemic (actually, better than normal on account of what we saved from not eating out or getting gas), but I watched him undergo a paycut and consequent inflation of responsibilities as he took on extra work from people who had been let go or furloughed. His job got harder and he made less money, simultaneously. My year of teaching was not easy, but then again, most people's years weren't easy, so I can't hold that against teaching. I'll remain in this career, in part because I see its upsides, and also in part because I'm so far bought in that changing now means abandoning the years of effort to get to where I'm at, which is finally, comfortably, "head above water".

    That said, despite this affirmation of my career, this year also fully broke my faith that education will do right by me. We are constantly called, as teachers, to go "above and beyond" for the sake of students, and we do because we care. However, when it comes time for leadership to support us, it's clear that the "above and beyond" imposition only goes one way. What I'm about to say will sound contradictory, but it is the absolute truth and really highlights just how bad things are systemically: I simultaneously feel lucky that I work in the school in which I work at because our leadership did most things "right" but also my leadership did not even meet minimum standards.

    There's a lot I would like to share about that, but I don't because it's potentially identifying for me, my area, and my district, but the main lesson I learned this last year is that, when the chips are down, I can't rely on the people above me to do what's right. Their view of us and our role is rooted in hostility and a lack of trust, and it's clear that even at our most outstanding that will never change. I've shared here that even for periods where I was remotely teaching and all students were at home logging in to Zoom, we still had to drive to the school building and teach from our empty classrooms, because they didn't trust us to be home. They also were very concerned about COVID leave being abused, but our school board asked our superintendent about it halfway through the school year, and he admitted that not only were teachers not abusing leave by faking exposures or quarantines, but that most teachers were taking on extra duties daily in covering for others who had to quarantine!

    My superintendent likes the image this public support of teachers gives him, and it should be proof that, even when teachers can take advantage of the situation to our benefit, we're still choosing, en masse, to do what's right. However, the public support is simply posturing, as this is also the superintendent that regularly fights our union on even providing cost-of-living raises and draws out contract negotiations by stonewalling for literal years. We never actually successfully negotiated a temporary contract regarding COVID protocols because the district dragged out the negotiations, knowing that we would show up and do our jobs anyway. Of course we will. Not just because we care, but because we're also under duress -- no teacher is going to forefeit their entire pension by not. The only things we were asking for in the contract were assurances for recommended safety protocols, and they wouldn't even agree to that. It should have been a slam dunk for them: "we're protecting the health and safety of our community -- of YOUR kids!" Instead, the message they want to go for is, consistently, "we're fighting those greedy do-nothing teachers taking up YOUR tax dollars!" It sucks when the relationship between teachers and the community is oppositional, but it really sucks when that relationship is actively encouraged by leadership because it benefits them.

    So, the outcome of this is, while I will continue in this career and will be appreciative of its benefits (like its absolutely incredible, unparalleled time off -- I'm writing this from the middle of my summer vacation), I will absolutely not go "above and beyond" on behalf of a system that will not even repay me partially for that. It really sucks when something meaningful like teaching gets treated as so heartlessly transactional, but for well over a decade at this point I've been asked to and expected to sacrifice for a system that refuses to sacrifice anything for me in return.

    10 votes
  11. Comment on Speedruns for Trans Liberation charity marathon begins today, July 30 in ~lgbt

    kfwyre
    Link Parent
    The event begins in less than an hour!

    The event begins in less than an hour!

    1 vote
  12. Comment on Playdate, the indie handheld gaming console with a crank, begins preorders on Thursday, July 29 at 10:00 AM PDT in ~games

    kfwyre
    Link Parent
    I'm in the US and ran into shipping errors as well. I was in the queue and got put through to the order screen very early (probably in the first minute or two of it going live), but I spent...

    I'm in the US and ran into shipping errors as well. I was in the queue and got put through to the order screen very early (probably in the first minute or two of it going live), but I spent minutes trying to get the shipping working. I was worried refreshing the page was going to make me lose my spot, so I kept moving back and forth between the screen where I entered my info and the screen where shipping was calculated until it finally went through.

    Sorry that you missed the first batch. That's frustrating.

    2 votes
  13. Comment on Weekly US politics news and updates thread - week of July 26 in ~news

    kfwyre
    Link
    As new school year looms, debates over mask mandates stir anger and confusion

    As new school year looms, debates over mask mandates stir anger and confusion

    New federal guidelines prompted by a surge in coronavirus cases have left school leaders across the country embroiled in debates over whether to require masks in schools, muddling a long-sought return to normalcy for millions of children.

    The wrangling over masks, considered by pediatricians and epidemiologists to be one of the most effective ways to stop school spread, has turned deeply personal and political, fueling vitriol at school board meetings that have left board members fearing for their safety. Several Republican-led states have barred school districts from requiring masks, threatening to fine school leaders or cut state funding if they attempt it.

    Caught in the fray are school leaders, who are forced to again navigate constantly shifting pandemic conditions, conflicting guidance on how to manage them and political fights — all while trying to craft policies that will keep students safe and buildings open. Because despite the deep divide over masks, there is a virtual consensus that it is critical to get children back to face-to-face learning.

    3 votes
  14. Comment on Weekly coronavirus-related chat, questions, and minor updates - week of July 26 in ~health.coronavirus

    kfwyre
    Link
    ‘The war has changed’: Internal CDC document urges new messaging, warns delta infections likely more severe

    ‘The war has changed’: Internal CDC document urges new messaging, warns delta infections likely more severe

    The delta variant of the coronavirus appears to cause more severe illness than earlier variants and spreads as easily as chickenpox, according to an internal federal health document that argues officials must “acknowledge the war has changed.”

    The document is an internal Centers for Disease Control and Prevention slide presentation, shared within the CDC and obtained by The Washington Post. It captures the struggle of the nation’s top public health agency to persuade the public to embrace vaccination and prevention measures, including mask-wearing, as cases surge across the United States and new research suggests vaccinated people can spread the virus.

    The document strikes an urgent note, revealing the agency knows it must revamp its public messaging to emphasize vaccination as the best defense against a variant so contagious that it acts almost like a different novel virus, leaping from target to target more swiftly than Ebola or the common cold.

    4 votes
  15. Comment on Playdate, the indie handheld gaming console with a crank, begins preorders on Thursday, July 29 at 10:00 AM PDT in ~games

    kfwyre
    Link Parent
    Ah, I didn't even think about the fact that you could order two. Good point.

    Ah, I didn't even think about the fact that you could order two. Good point.

    2 votes
  16. Comment on Playdate, the indie handheld gaming console with a crank, begins preorders on Thursday, July 29 at 10:00 AM PDT in ~games

    kfwyre
    Link
    Similar to the Steam Deck sales numbers leak, it turns out we have some data on Playdate sales based on the fact that Shopify uses sequential order numbers starting at 1001. My preorder went...

    Similar to the Steam Deck sales numbers leak, it turns out we have some data on Playdate sales based on the fact that Shopify uses sequential order numbers starting at 1001.

    My preorder went through 10 minutes after they went live, and my order number is in the 11000s, which means they did 10K sales (half their initial inventory) in the first 10 minutes.

    4 votes
  17. Comment on What are you reading these days? in ~books

    kfwyre
    Link
    Invisible Women: Data Bias in a World Designed for Men by Caroline Criado-Perez I just finished this and give it an enthusiastic recommendation. The main focus of the book is in using data to root...

    Invisible Women: Data Bias in a World Designed for Men by Caroline Criado-Perez

    I just finished this and give it an enthusiastic recommendation. The main focus of the book is in using data to root out systemic biases that disproportionately impact women. The book jumps between identifying many instances of this, and also identifying areas where there is a "data gap", where any potential disproportionate harm can't be identified because we cannot disaggregate the data based on sex or gender.

    The book was really eye-opening, as it highlighted a lot of hidden or behind-the-scenes decisions that we don't really think about. One thing that stuck with me, for example, was that the US did not use crash test dummies based on female bodies for measuring car safety until 2011(!!!). The previous dummies used were based on a 50th percentile male body. When they started using female dummies, it revealed how the, at face value, "gender-neutral" safety ratings for cars misrepresented their safety as it applied to women:

    Even with all these gaps, the 2011 introduction of the female crash-test dummy in the US still sent cars’ star ratings plummeting. The Washington Post reported on the experience of Beth Milito and her husband, who bought a 2011 Toyota Sienna, based primarily on its four-star safety rating. But all was not as it seemed. The passenger seat, which Milito says she is likely to be sitting in when they are ‘out and about as a family’, had a two-star rating. In the previous year’s model, the front passenger seat (tested on a male dummy) had earned a top five-star rating. But the shift to female dummies revealed that in a front collision at 35 mph a female passenger had a 20-40% risk of being killed or seriously injured. The average risk of death for that class of vehicle, explains the Washington Post, is 15%.

    There is a lot more in the book, and it's honestly the kind of book that doesn't do well in summary, as there are lot of individual little threads that connect together into a much larger web. I highly recommend it to anyone that's interested in the topic.

    5 votes
  18. Comment on Should you be wearing a mask again? Here’s a map of the Covid hot spots subject to the CDC’s new guidance in ~health.coronavirus

    kfwyre
    Link Parent
    This probably comes on the heels of the CDC changing their guidance for schools. They recently reversed course and are now recommending masks for all people in schools regardless of vaccination...

    This probably comes on the heels of the CDC changing their guidance for schools. They recently reversed course and are now recommending masks for all people in schools regardless of vaccination status:

    Given new evidence on the B.1.617.2 (Delta) variant, CDC has updated the guidance for fully vaccinated people. CDC recommends universal indoor masking for all teachers, staff, students, and visitors to K-12 schools, regardless of vaccination status. Children should return to full-time in-person learning in the fall with layered prevention strategies in place.

    9 votes
  19. Comment on How has the pandemic changed you? in ~talk

    kfwyre
    Link Parent
    I cannot tell you how happy I was to see your name pop up in my responses. Good to see you again, Algernon! Thanks for sharing this, and I hope you're able to get the hugs you need. Consider this...

    I cannot tell you how happy I was to see your name pop up in my responses. Good to see you again, Algernon! Thanks for sharing this, and I hope you're able to get the hugs you need. Consider this comment an internet hug from me. :)

    8 votes