The Airbnb/Hotel Gap: Private common spaces
Once or twice a year, my friends and I do a "Friend Getaway" where we rent an Airbnb and all communally nerd out. Magic, D&D, videogames, tabletop stuff, etc. It's a great time. We look forward to it every year.
Unfortunately, our experience with Airbnbs has progressively gotten worse over time (not that it was ever great), with this past weekend being our worst ever. We ended up leaving early and escalated a complaint with the platform (not that I actually think that will do anything, which is one of the problems with Airbnb in the first place).
Unfortunately, we're kind of stuck with going with an Airbnb (or similar, like VRBO) if we want to keep doing this because they're the only thing that give us what we want: private common spaces.
The reason we get an Airbnb in the first place isn't for the destination or the attractions around it. It's so we can all hang out together in the living room and dining room, and cook group meals in the kitchen. We retire to the beds to sleep, but 90% of our waking time is spent grouping ourselves up in the common areas by interest.
If we could stay at a hotel and rent out a living room, dining room, and kitchen for the group, we absolutely would. Ever since Airbnbs became a thing, I was hoping hotels would move a little bit in the direction of offering similar setups, but it feels like at most you can simply get a regular hotel room with a kitchenette. They're not really conducive to groups at all.
To me, there's currently a huge gap between what hotels offer and what Airbnb offers, and if you want the latter, you have to put up with a lot of awfulness that's just sort of embedded into their business model.
I don't really have a point in posting this other than to highlight that and hope that it starts some discussion. I'm also hoping that someone tells me that I'm completely wrong and that there are hotels out there that actually do offer Airbnb-like stays/facilities and I just don't know about them.
Pool together and rent some combination of a suite and a room in the same hotel. The suite will provide a kitchen and living area, and the other hotel rooms are just basically bedrooms. Check the suite's offerings but I've been in a couple that were standard offerings with a full (small) kitchen, washer, dryer, living room, two beds, and a Murphy bed. These were standard hotel chains accessed via timeshare of a family friend, but were comfortable for six moderately-to-very large people to share space in.
From my experience, it may make help to specifically look for "extended stay" hotels like Residence Inn. I've seen Residence Inn two story suites, including a kitchen and living area. But, the living area and kitchen were a bit small, so it really depends on how many people will be there.
I'm going to go against the grain here and say the number of good properties has not gone down on airBnB. I would say the ratio of good to bad properties has gone down which makes them harder to find.
I have rented about 20 airBnBs over the last decade or so and to date have never had a poor experience. Or at least never had a poor experience in one that I picked. But I'm also very particular. Here is my checklist of sorts:
Large number of reviews, hard minimum of 75 but ideally 100+ reviews. This is as much about sample size as it is about duration on Airbnb. After 100 people have gone through a home the owner knows about and has ironed out the kinks. Think- the funny furnace thermostat, the frozen pipe in winter, the pool algae problem, etc.
High 5 star to everything else ratio. Most people will give anything with 4 walls 5 stars so you have to be pretty strict with this. It can vary a lot per area but there should be a hard minimum of 80%ish 5 Star reviews
Vet every non 5 star review made in the last few months. Super handy for finding out about things like new construction noises, road closures, broken elevator, etc.
Vet every 1 star review. Any 1 star review is usually some freak one time occurrence but check them to see if there's any patterns emerging, defensive replies from the host, etc.
Most can be eliminated in seconds, some take a few minutes. Definitely time well spent though!
My one nightmare AirBnB situation came from a listing with only a couple of reviews. We ended up evicted because the landlord didn’t like subleasing and had to find a hotel at midnight. We got a full refund and applied it to a much more legit location, but it was more expensive and we had to cut the trip short.
Edit: one other thing, if you have any places you really liked or find one in the future, stick with it! Maybe get to know the owner and work directly with them.
I have a group of friends with similar use cases. We have a lot of young children too so a lot of the requirements for everyone are pretty firm. I’m curious what kinds of issues you have had with Airbnbs. I have definitely had some bad experiences, dirty locations, creepy locations, completely different from described, no response from host and unable to check in, double booked. But usually things go pretty well when the location has a lot of reviews and looks like a good quality place. I would look for places that look well maintained and taken care of without looking super generic. Look for places that don’t look managed by a big airbnb host. Larger places are usually better in my experience. Going to less touristy destinations can be better because there’s less people running multiple. (I found one exception to these rules is mountain ski resort areas like Lame Tahoe. Cabins there are made for time sharing and so the industry is more consistent. ). There are vacation rentals listed elsewhere that could be great, but I don’t know much about them.
I think the hotel experience as mentioned in another comment could work, but I don’t think it’s great for just hanging out.
General Issues
Like everything else, costs and fees have risen, and the return on those has gotten worse. We’re doing more chores with fewer and worse amenities while paying more for them. This has made the relative appeal of the platform go down over time. Listings are also more and more likely to be from big property management companies instead of homey locals, and those companies feel like they’re running lean rather than providing good quality service.
There are also a lot of little “papercuts” — no one of which is a dealbreaker but that all together add non-negligible friction. Stuff like kitchens not having spices/oils (or even usable cookware). Beds having terrible mattresses. Stuff not being cleaned. Etc.
I’ll also add that my friend group isn’t particularly wealthy, so we are priced out of a lot of the top-end stuff where we likely wouldn’t have as many issues.
As for our specific problems, buckle up! Here they are in way too much detail. Also I’ll note in advance that all of these bookings had good reviews and ratings:
2023 Trip:
We arrive at the house and there is no soap or toilet paper there at all. The house is pretty remote and on a septic system, and there are big angry signs in each bathroom to ONLY USE THE PROVIDED TOILET PAPER.
We figure we can just go buy some toilet paper, but after contacting the host to confirm the type of toilet paper needed, which is apparently a VERY SERIOUS ISSUE, the host says, no, don’t buy anything, they’ll send someone. We must use their toilet paper.
Nobody shows up for five hours. When the person finally arrives, we talk to her. She’s their hired cleaner and lives over an hour away. What does she deliver us? Regular old toilet paper. Stuff we could have gotten ourselves at a store five minutes away. Stuff we would have already gotten if not for the VERY STERN TOILET PAPER WARNINGS. The host made this person drive two hours to deliver toilet paper. We felt awful for her.
Also fun (but not a fault of the host or anything): there was a storm and power went out shortly after we got there. It was remote enough that we didn’t have cellphone service. I joked with my husband that “this is how the horror movie always starts and everybody gets mad at the characters for not leaving.” We didn’t leave, of course.
In the grand scheme of things, this wasn’t a huge issue, but it was bothersome that after a long drive out there we couldn’t adequately use the bathroom or wash our hands. Also, like, we’re reasonable people. We’ll pick up some toilet paper ourselves, just tell us what to get. Don’t send your cleaning lady on a two hour round trip for no reason.
Additionally, the place had a pretty ridiculous chore list, which was rich for a place that didn’t have, you know, soap.
We’ll give this one the bronze medal. Third place. Minor inconvenience, but really nothing worth getting worked up over.
2024 Trip:
The entry door is up a set of stairs. They are covered in ice. Nothing has been salted or removed. We hold onto the handrails for dear life upon entering and exiting. Thankfully, it’s the dead of winter, so we don’t plan on exiting much. We’re all about being cozy inside.
Once up the stairs, the door to the house is open. Granted, it was like 95% of the way closed, but it definitely wasn’t fully latched or locked. One of our friends is a locksmith and takes great delight in identifying that pretty much everything on the door is installed wrong which is why the door won’t stay closed or locked as intended.
We scan the whole house making sure nobody was hiding out in there. Thankfully no one was. We contact the host about the door, they’re unbothered, and we enjoy our weekend. No issues other than that one of the bathrooms didn’t have frosted glass and could be looked into from outside. This is bad for most people, but great for exhibitionists, I guess?
After our stay, the host sends us pictures of minor and very clearly longstanding cosmetic issues with the house and says we are at fault for them. We’re very much the kind of people who leave places better than we found them, and this place also had a ridiculous chore list which we dutifully fulfilled, so to be accused of damaging the property was pretty heinous. The host escalated things with Airbnb and my friend couldn’t prove that we didn’t cause those damages, so he folds and deletes his account.
It left a very sour taste in our mouth for what was otherwise a good trip. Silver medal. Second place.
2025 Trip
The listing had good reviews and a good rating. My friend who booked it noted, however, that after he booked the listing, it seemed to have been taken down. He could no longer access the reviews. Very odd.
He then gets a message from the host that the host will be out of the country during our stay, but here are the phone numbers of people we can contact. Pretty sketchy that the person’s trying to have us contact outside of Airbnb’s platform. Also not sure I’m buying that this person is out of the country “right now” and not “always.”
Anyway, twice shy from the burn of the last trip, we resolve to photo or video any issues we encounter and, if significant enough, raise them immediately to the host (through Airbnb, not the numbers we were given).
Issue one arises quickly: attempting to use the oven fills the place with a very strong gas smell. Strong enough that we had to open windows and doors to clear it out. So, probable gas leak in the oven. We opt not to use it, which cramps our cooking plans for the weekend. We contact the host, who seems unbothered.
Issues two through n are minor and not really worth raising (which we didn’t). There was toilet paper in this house, but only a single roll (or less) in each bathroom. Lots of bad craftsmanship and whatnot, with work clearly done by the lowest bidder. Only two of the burners on the stove work. The one pan they do have has a loose handle making it pretty unsafe to use. The dishes in the cabinets were dirty. After running them through the dishwasher, we learn that the dishwasher doesn’t work so we have to clean everything by hand. Etc.
Issue n + 1 was the dealbreaker: I wake up in a basement bedroom, walk out, and there’s water all in the main area. Our friend who slept on the couch there (and who was still asleep at this time, bless him) has all his stuff sitting right in the middle of what is now a very large 15 feet/4.5 meter diameter puddle. I move his stuff to a dry spot and then immediately start taking pictures and videoing.
No way in hell are we getting blamed for this.
To be fair, the area was getting a lot of rain at near-freezing temperatures, which is when basement flooding is likely to happen.
Except, this was a walk-out basement.
For some reason, the walkout basement faced uphill, so water naturally runs right towards the door. There was a drain installed in front of the door, but it was completely clogged/frozen (we weren’t sure which, but probably clogged).
We gather up all the extra towels in the house and sop up most of the puddle, then put them in the spin cycle and dryer, knowing we’re going to need them again (it’s supposed to rain all day). It’s only then that we learn that the dryer (surprise surprise) doesn’t work.
We let the host know about the flooding. He tells us it’s a “freak accident.” We’re finding that hard to believe as we’re now noticing tell-tale signs of water damage all over the basement.
He says he’ll send a guy over.
Thankfully the rain is letting up, and the puddle is now mostly dry, so we just try to ignore it and enjoy the rest of our day.
Except the rain comes back. Worse than before. I can now stand in the basement and see that the waterline against the walkout door is higher than the basement floor. Not good.
The puddle is back and worse than before. We make a towel levee. The water has graduated from puddle to reservoir. We all take showers and then sacrifice our shower towels for the purposes of flooding mitigation.
This helps, sort of. Water is water though. It finds a way. Even in non-flooded areas of the basement, you can step on the flooring and see drops coming up between the boards. We start to wonder just how much mold is hiding out down here.
The guy that the host called shows up (some six hours afterwards). He takes a look and says he’ll see what he can do. He leaves without doing anything and doesn’t return. (I don’t blame him. He probably wasn’t getting paid enough to deal with that.)
We decide to call it and leave early. Our friend records a full-house video walkthrough identifying the condition we’re leaving it in, just to be safe.
He contacts the host and asks for a refund for the remaining nights. The host agrees, but only if we use Cash App or Zelle. Another major red flag.
The following day my friend files a complaint with Airbnb. We’re still waiting on a response.
Gold medal. First place. The podium is now standing in an inch of water.
Update: Airbnb resolved the complaint. The host agreed to refund the rest of the stay (through Airbnb, not through a separate app), and Airbnb knocked some money off the total.
The price we ended up paying in the end felt pretty fair for what we got, though I would have rather not had to cut the trip short, of course.
Have you considered renting a conference room? The costs can vary greatly and they won’t include a kitchen, but since they are often in hotels there are some amenities that you could add on (like on-premises catering).
A conference room isn't the vibe we're going for, and the lack of a kitchen is a non-starter. A few people in our group really look forward to cooking big meals for everyone (it's a big part of the weekend for them!).
I appreciate the suggestions though!
Renting out whole flats and houses is a thing that has existed since long before AirBnB. My parents used to rent cottages for us to go on family holidays when they got fed up of staying in tents all the time, and that was before AirBnB even existed. My wife and I often stay in holiday flats when going on city breaks, because you've got the flexibility of being able to cook yourselves.
We usually use booking.com. It's often got a lot of the same or similar properties to AirBnB, but I trust its ratings a bit more - it's easier to read through the reviews and see things that people are consistently mentioning. If you're going to a particularly touristy place, often that place will have an official website where you can search for places to stay in that area, and we've found that useful a couple of times.
Another option might be youth hostels. These are often laid out in different ways - sometimes there's just male and female dorms, sometimes you can rent group rooms, and sometimes there are individual rooms - but they almost always have a common kitchen and living area. In fairness, that's still a common room where other guests can come in, but it's usually comfortable enough for board games or some D&D or something like that. For larger groups, you can even rent out a whole youth hostel.
There are also things like aparthotels that take elements of a hotel and elements of an apartment, but what that actually means tends to be quite flexible, so maybe look into the specifics there.
There are a few - very few - boutique hotels/commercial properties offering things like rental cabins and so on. That’s about the only way to get a full kitchen through a standard commercial lodging provider. Otherwise, you’re best off either continuing to go with AirBnB or doing what @knocklessmonster suggested and getting one suite and a bunch of regular rooms.
Hotels that rent out suites with full kitchens definitely exist, but poking at a few travel booking sites, it's surprisingly hard to specify that that's what you're looking for. I did find one service that specialized in finding suites and connected rooms, but I have no idea of its quality.
Otherwise, are you up for renting a cabin from a smaller, more localized service like @R3qn65 mentions? I've used this one for example (once, ten years ago, so grain of salt and all) and I was appreciative.
If you're up for roughing it a bit, you could always try to find cabins at state parks. (I think you're in the US? Apologies if I got that wrong.) You may or may not have to bring your own linens and housewares. You didn't say how large your group was, but if it's bigger than four-to-six people you might have to get more than one cabin. You say you group up by common interest, so it might be possible to use the different cabins for different interests? Or you could gather at areas outside? I know it's not really the same as being able to float easily from one group to the other inside the same residence, but it's a suggestion you might not have thought of.
EDIT: Just as a curiosity, not because it fits your use case: Before AirBnB, I had a group of friends who would gather to stay at a hotel and rent out a small conference room to hang out in. Definitely no kitchens there (we went out to eat), and the aesthetic was very utilitarian, but it worked for our purposes. We would mostly just hang out, play goofy party games or silly show-and-tell, and watch our traditional bad movie with a TV on a cart provided by the hotel. On the second day of the hangout, we'd find a park to wander and play outdoor games and have a picnic/barbecue on the public grills. Good memories there, but yours sound pretty homey and cozy. I wouldn't have minded if we'd done it that way.
Staybridge Suites is a widespread one (IHG brand) available in a lot of places. They exclusively do suites, which have kitchen space and a common area. I've personally stayed at some of theirs, but there are definitely other brands. I think home2 is another (Hilton). Hotels are usually fairly well segmented by market that way.
Your typical travel booking sites can probably filter properties to show suites, in one way or another as well. (e.g. bedroom count, brand, etc.)
I unfortunately have to bring up that national parks are likely going to be understaffed after recent federal action. I'm unsure if this will have an impact on state parks - theoretically not?
If the goal is to be completely self-sustaining, that's probably still fine. But if you're leaning on any form of housekeeping, shuttle buses, or even just clean bathrooms, your results may vary.
I haven't done it myself, so I'm not sure how it compares to AirBnB, but many hotel brands also arrange house rentals. I know Marriott does through their Homes and Villas site and it's likely other brands have similar rentals. In some tourist areas there are often local rental companies that arrange house or cabin rentals, but you'll likely need to search for them by region.
We rented an apartment for our honeymoon and this was not through Airbnb.
We do this kind of thing with my family every summer, and are still having good luck with airbnb. We're a pretty large group, so we're generally booking something with 5-6 bedrooms. At that level it's pricey but my experience has been pretty good. We've stayed in several that are pretty much in the middle of nowhere, so they have to be nice to have much of a draw.
I don't know what area you're in but if you're interested in Eastern Ohio or Western PA I could make a couple of specific recommendations.
Oh my goodness, there’s another one that I just figured out might be great. If you’re all meeting around where one of you lives, contact local community centers. They typically have rooms that can be reserved, tables and chairs, and even kitchens.
If you reserve a room for an event it might be pretty expensive (I just checked the fee schedule for mine and the prices they list are per hour), but if you talk to the organizer you might find you can get a discount rate or even use a room for free because you’re just a resident and not an organization.
I've stayed at a lot of AirBnbs and have yet to have an issue that I haven't also had at a hotel (such as the pictures looking nicer than the actual room). But for hotels, I've had some really nice/large rooms at a place like Hyatt House that have a kitchen and separate dining / living area with the bed in a different room. I second the other suggestions to have one person of your party get a larger suite if you're committed to doing a hotel instead of an AirBNB. You could also look into resorts that offer units with multiple bedrooms that tend to have large living areas and full kitchens.
I believe what you’re looking for might be similar to serviced apartments. They’re somewhere between a hotel and renting, and usually priced somewhere between a hotel and a hostel.
I’ve stayed in a few when I wanted a cheap place to stay that wasn’t communal showers, so they’re more expensive than a hostel but cheaper than a hotel for the same number of beds. There have been a few times that they didn’t have a single room when I turned up for my booking, so I got a free upgrade to an apartment that included two rooms each with a double bed. You get the whole room to yourself and they’re designed for someone to live in for a few weeks to a few months at a time, so they have a full bathroom, washing machine and dryer, complete (albeit tiny) kitchen including fridge/freezer, dishwasher, and a sink. The bedrooms have closable doors but the apartment is usually an open plan living room/dining room/kitchen space.
Depending on how many friends, you might need to book a few rooms but I’m sure they could accommodate two or three rooms on the same floor if you call in advance and it’s not a super busy time.