11 votes

How to compliment

3 comments

  1. [2]
    scrambo
    (edited )
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    Not the largest contributor here, so if I've mislabeled something, lemme know! I'm a fan of Less Penguiny (and their name even more), found them on their freshmen article On Bragging, and I feel...

    Not the largest contributor here, so if I've mislabeled something, lemme know!

    I'm a fan of Less Penguiny (and their name even more), found them on their freshmen article On Bragging, and I feel that their takeaways are usually pretty workable. Haven't gone through the whole article yet, but I'll come back and update my comment here when I do.

    I like topics that deal with human nature like this. I don't get "us" (barely get myself sometimes lol) so it's cool to see other perspectives about how we are in groups.

    The more I read on this article, the more I see patterns emerging from relationships in my life. I have a coworker who follows this excerpt almost to the 't':

    An even softer form of ignoring a compliment is to reply roughly on-topic, but without affirming or disconfirming the praise:

    “Nice suit.”
    “I bought it at Harvey’s. Have you seen their window display lately?"

    Not that it's bad, it's just funny to see something I've unconsciously noticed in writing, from another person who doesn't know me or my people in my extended circle.

    4 votes
    1. [2]
      Comment deleted by author
      Link Parent
      1. scrambo
        Link Parent
        No I wouldn't say so. On the offhand I've had to talk with him about something that wasn't positive, he's always been pretty receptive to what I was saying. He's a good guy, just not the most...

        No I wouldn't say so. On the offhand I've had to talk with him about something that wasn't positive, he's always been pretty receptive to what I was saying. He's a good guy, just not the most socially intelligent? I feel like that sounds like more of an insult than I want it to. He's very quiet, has no inflection to his voice when talking to most people. I seem to be an exception since I've made the effort to talk and be friendly when I first started working there and he reciprocated.

        1 vote
  2. skybrian
    Link
    That is an impressively thorough article. I wouldn’t have thought so much could be said on this subject.

    That is an impressively thorough article. I wouldn’t have thought so much could be said on this subject.

    3 votes