Blest's recent activity

  1. Comment on Recommended length of paternity leave? in ~life

    Blest
    Link Parent
    I'm definitely going to look into spacing it out if possible, that would probably be the best case scenario (also factoring in working from home when possible). The sad part is, they would say...

    I'm definitely going to look into spacing it out if possible, that would probably be the best case scenario (also factoring in working from home when possible).

    It's up to your manager to figure out with your co-workers. They'll cover for you, just as you'll cover for them if they're in the same position down the road.

    The sad part is, they would say they would cover for me, but with past time off I've had to take the bare minimum was too much of an inconvenience for them (one of whom was my best man at my wedding!).

  2. Comment on Recommended length of paternity leave? in ~life

    Blest
    Link Parent
    I definitely don't want to be that husband that devotes all my time and attention to work instead of home life like I should. I've seen that happen too many times with other people (my boss...

    My husband said similar things about not wanting to let his coworkers down when I asked him to be home more. I had to point out that by prioritising them, he was letting me down, and he was placing an unfair burden on me rather than them. He hadn’t really seen in that way until I said so. If you have family nearby who can help her, that’s something (I didn’t, my family are the other side of the world), but it can’t replace the family bonding between the three of you.

    I definitely don't want to be that husband that devotes all my time and attention to work instead of home life like I should. I've seen that happen too many times with other people (my boss included). Thankfully both of our mom's and families are within 10-15 minutes away from us, and her mom will be around alot to help out with her and the baby as she has a pretty flexible work schedule as well.

  3. Comment on Recommended length of paternity leave? in ~life

    Blest
    Link Parent
    According to HR I do qualify for both State and Company paternal leave, and the company offers an additional 5 weeks as well. My wife is self employed and hasn't saved up enough for the 3 months...

    According to HR I do qualify for both State and Company paternal leave, and the company offers an additional 5 weeks as well. My wife is self employed and hasn't saved up enough for the 3 months she expects to take off from work; we have savings between our individual and joint accounts, but I'd rather not have to blow through it for rent, and the essentials. Thankfully I do have the option to work from home a good amount as well so I'll need to reevaluate my plan and try to get more home time.

  4. Comment on Recommended length of paternity leave? in ~life

    Blest
    Link Parent
    You make some good points! I've been thinking about taking more time off the more I talk to people about it, and while I don't want to miss too much work I also want to make sure I am there for my...

    You make some good points! I've been thinking about taking more time off the more I talk to people about it, and while I don't want to miss too much work I also want to make sure I am there for my wife and child and getting to spend those important early days with them.

    As others have said, take as much time as you think you can then add some. Mom is going to need help. If she's nursing (and she should at least for a few months) she'll be really short on quality sleep. And that's on top of the exhaustion from growing and birthing a human. I'd recommend pumping and freezing and giving her nights off where you do the feedings with thawed milk.

    I hadn't even thought of doing this, that seems like a good move. Appreciate the insight!

    3 votes

  5. Recommended length of paternity leave?

    ~life Ask (advice)
    Hello, I’m soon to become a father to my firstborn child and have the opportunity to take some paternity leave through work. While the length of time I can take is very generous (as far as I...

    Hello,

    I’m soon to become a father to my firstborn child and have the opportunity to take some paternity leave through work. While the length of time I can take is very generous (as far as I know), I’m truly unsure how much is usually the norm for fathers.

    I work in a stable office job, while my wife is self employed and will be taking 3 months off. I am leaning towards taking the week after birth off and intermittently working from home afterwards as needed, as even with leave I would most likely not receive my full 100% pay, which we will definitely need. In addition to the financial impact, my daily work usually consists of stuff that my coworkers would be unable or struggle with staying on top of, and I do not want to put any extra burden on them, or have tasks not completed merely to back up until my return.

    Any advice or comments would be much appreciated as I am struggling to figure this out!

    37 votes