20 votes

A decade without a drink

5 comments

  1. [3]
    bushbear
    Link
    January 1st will be 4 years sober for me. Its a very convenient date and reminder haha. I enjoy reading about other people's journey to sobriety. It puts your journey into perspective. I also...

    January 1st will be 4 years sober for me. Its a very convenient date and reminder haha.

    I enjoy reading about other people's journey to sobriety. It puts your journey into perspective. I also appreciated the timelines the author added. One thing iv discovered since becoming sober is I don't think I'm as "fun" anymore. Well more like I do different things that are fun but the friends I still have don't do those activities. So I do a lot of solo activities. Sometimes it's lonely but ya know you just kinda keep doing it.

    Something else I think about frequently related to fun is that I think drinking damaged my "good time receptors" in the brain. I believe that's the sciency way of putting it. Having "good time" was tied up with getting drunk and now I don't really know how to have a good time without it. Its not that I don't have good times and laughs with friends but it kinda just feels weird and more difficult.

    I hope all that made sense. Anyway keep up the good work anyone else who is sober or struggling. It's worth it and the best thing you can do for yourself.

    10 votes
    1. [2]
      atoxje
      Link Parent
      First of all: Congrats on your 4 years! I’m 3,5 now and what you write sounds very relatable. Since I stopped drinking, I seem to have a lot more free time, I had to learn to cope with boredom,...

      First of all: Congrats on your 4 years! I’m 3,5 now and what you write sounds very relatable. Since I stopped drinking, I seem to have a lot more free time, I had to learn to cope with boredom, and I’ve discovered a lot of my social interactions only seemed fun because alcohol was involved.

      I lost a lot of friends because of my divorce, but to stop with drinking a few years after definitely added to that problem. And building up a new social circle has been challenging. Also, doing it sober means doing it more… truthfully? And that just takes a lot of time.

      I feel like I’m living a better life but as you say, it can be really lonely. It’s just so crazy how inundated our lives are with alcohol. To the point that drinking almost feels like an ‘access pass’ you need to posses in order to participate in social activities.

      I don’t want to end on too dark a note: I have discovered a few wonderful, quirky people who stopped drinking a long time ago. Or never even drank in the first place. I guess those people would have been called nerds by the people who I used to call friends. Now I very much enjoy their kind presence, even though they’re not often present. I have also found a lot of great hobbies, like playing ffxiv or watching F1/NBA, where I get to feel that being alone is not all that bad. Sometimes, I can feel it’s better to be alone sober than it is to be surrounded but drunk. But I also still miss the illusion of camaraderie that drinking brought with it.

      I recently saw a graph that showed teenagers are drinking less and less. I hope that’s true. I hope my daughter will grow up in an environment where drinking is not the norm. Because as I see it, our collective relationship with alcohol is all but normal.

      4 votes
      1. bushbear
        Link Parent
        Thanks pal! And you keep on keeping on! Yea it's amazing how much free time you have once you stop. I can finally try doing stuff I always talked about and also have the money for.

        Thanks pal! And you keep on keeping on!

        Yea it's amazing how much free time you have once you stop. I can finally try doing stuff I always talked about and also have the money for.

        3 votes
  2. trim
    Link
    Sounds very familiar. I slid in to heavy drinking over a period of 25 years or more, to the point where I'd drink a bottle of whiskey and a bottle of wine every night. It all started as dutch...

    Sounds very familiar. I slid in to heavy drinking over a period of 25 years or more, to the point where I'd drink a bottle of whiskey and a bottle of wine every night. It all started as dutch courage from when I was a gigging musician in my teens and early 20s. I think that anyway.

    I like to think I was functional, no-one ever confronted me about it, not family or friends, so either they were being kind, or ignoring it, or I was good at hiding it.

    So eventually I had a child, and I thought to myself, I'm not going to see him grow up in a state like this.

    I too went cold turkey without being aware of the consequences. I spent a week (I think, it's fuzzy) sweating and shivering and hallucinating in bed, it was incredibly hard. And, as I learned later, incredibly dangerous.

    I've been sober for 15 years or so now, and happier for it.

    6 votes
  3. Earhart_Light
    Link
    What an inspiring story!

    What an inspiring story!

    5 votes