20 votes

Laziness does not exist

7 comments

  1. [3]
    Greg
    Link
    I'm concerned that the author doubles down on the absolute "laziness does not exist" point at the start and end of the article - it's not just clickbait for the title, it seems to be a genuine...

    I'm concerned that the author doubles down on the absolute "laziness does not exist" point at the start and end of the article - it's not just clickbait for the title, it seems to be a genuine belief, and I honestly think it's a damaging one.

    The bulk of the article, the point that often the appearance of laziness is actually due to much deeper problems, is important and valuable. It was well put and I hope more people internalise it, because it should be the base case approach for dealing with anybody who might be struggling.

    I'm speaking from far more experience than I would like when I say I know there are times that getting out of bed really isn't an option. I know intimately what mental health problems, and the treatment, and medication, and all the time and stress and side effects those bring do to a person's ability to function. But I also know how easy it is to convince yourself that today is one of the impossible days when actually it's just a difficult one.

    I'm constantly looking over my own shoulder to make sure I only use it as an "excuse" (sometimes to others, more importantly to myself) when I genuinely have to, not just when sitting around doing nothing seems more appealing. If laziness really didn't exist, that'd be carte blanche to take the easy path a lot more often, and I think I'd be a lot worse off for that.

    10 votes
    1. acdw
      Link Parent
      I actually had a conversation with my therapist recently about this guy I knew in college who I thought was using his depression as an "excuse," just as you've said, to not do things. I judged him...

      I'm constantly looking over my own shoulder to make sure I only use it as an "excuse"

      I actually had a conversation with my therapist recently about this guy I knew in college who I thought was using his depression as an "excuse," just as you've said, to not do things. I judged him for doing so, only to realize, after my depression's symptoms began worsening, that I wanted to do the same thing. I had the conversation with my therapist because I was realizing that I was judging myself just as harshly as I'd judged my friend, which isn't healthy.

      So what I think I'm saying is that I see where you come from, and honestly I'm glad I'm not alone in this particular train of thought. But also I think that part of getting better, at least for me, is being honest with myself when I really am not up to a task due to my mental health. And then forgiving myself for not doing that thing, whatever it is. It's hard, and I'm working hard at it, even though it really doesn't feel like it sometimes -- it feels like I'm being "lazy." So maybe my point is that I see where you're coming from, but I really want the more radical stance taken by the author of the article to be true. I'm not sure which is, though.

      7 votes
    2. unknown user
      Link Parent
      Depression isn't laziness. Mental fog is not just inclarity of mind: it's the absence of emotional strength to carry on until a reboot. You're not lazy when it's difficult to make your own food:...

      Depression isn't laziness. Mental fog is not just inclarity of mind: it's the absence of emotional strength to carry on until a reboot. You're not lazy when it's difficult to make your own food: you'd be lazy when you have the physical and mental strength but neh, just didn't feel like it.

      Depression requires working with, and therapy, and sometimes medication, and – more importantly – the understanding that your brain is fucked-up, and it's gonna lie to you, and it's gonna rob you of energy, unless you gather what little strength you have left and do something about it.

      Anxiety is best dealt with by getting started.

      Not that I'm conflating the simplicity of "just starting" with ease. Getting through an anxious episode may seem unbearable, and impossible, and even shameful. Which is okay, because it is what it is.

      My healing started to go better when I accepted that I have flaws beyond my control, and I have to give in a few times to gather more strength in the future and move further than I did previously. I'm going to worry about something so much I can't even stand the idea of starting the work on it. I'm going to feel so down I'd rather binge-eat and watch mindless YouTube videos all day. I'm going to feel bad about my health, and my looks, and my abilities, and my skills, and my socialization, and my circle of friends, and and and and...

      But that's okay, because at least I know what I'm working with. As long as I'm going through with minimal casualties from my longer-term potential, I'm gonna be alright once it passes. It helps when I can get into something that works for the downswing. Never thought I'd be binging on a fruit, but pomelos are surprisingly good if all you want today is to fill your stomach with something tasty and you like citruses.

      5 votes
  2. [4]
    alyaza
    Link
    (something of a meta point, but i really wish medium was a better, more stable platform because it really does fuck itself in constantly redefining what it wants and its business model. it has a...

    (something of a meta point, but i really wish medium was a better, more stable platform because it really does fuck itself in constantly redefining what it wants and its business model. it has a great deal of talent on it and just as many good essays and pieces--like this one--but they all feel like they're constantly at risk of getting deleted or zapped behind a paywall or driven off the platform at some point in the near future to the detriment of everybody because medium can't decide what it wants to do or how to implement it.)

    7 votes
    1. [3]
      cfabbro
      Link Parent
      They are a for-profit corporation which is $132M in the VC hole and they aren't profitable. So they have no choice but to keep fiddling with things until they start making a profit, and until they...

      They are a for-profit corporation which is $132M in the VC hole and they aren't profitable. So they have no choice but to keep fiddling with things until they start making a profit, and until they do will also have to keep raising more money or they will be forced to shut down.

      7 votes
      1. [2]
        Thrabalen
        Link Parent
        ... Welp, time to start backing up my writings.

        ...

        Welp, time to start backing up my writings.

        4 votes
        1. Alfred
          Link Parent
          Consider starting a personal blog

          Consider starting a personal blog

          3 votes