16 votes

Do Police Know How To Handle Abuse Within Kinky Relationships?

9 comments

  1. [4]
    Micycle_the_Bichael
    Link
    The police don’t know how to deal with abuse in any relationship, be it calls on the job or among their own ranks. Of course they don’t know how to police kinky relationships.

    The police don’t know how to deal with abuse in any relationship, be it calls on the job or among their own ranks. Of course they don’t know how to police kinky relationships.

    9 votes
    1. [3]
      Ellimist
      Link Parent
      Believe it or not, police can only do so much for abusive relationships It’s not really fair to pin all the blame on them. As a 911 Dispatcher, I can attest to the number of households in my city...

      Believe it or not, police can only do so much for abusive relationships

      It’s not really fair to pin all the blame on them.

      As a 911 Dispatcher, I can attest to the number of households in my city that we’d call “abusive situations” whether it’s relatives or significant others.

      We arrest the same people over and over for family and domestic violence. They spend a night in jail as a “cooling off” period but if the victim doesn’t want to press charges against their abuser, a common occurrence, there isn’t a whole lot PD can do about it. The victim has to want to press charges so we can file a protective order so if the abuser can be arrested if he/she goes back.

      9 votes
      1. [2]
        Micycle_the_Bichael
        Link Parent
        So I am going to say we are both right here. You’re correct, my tone definitely was accusatory and negative towards police, and as you point out, there isn’t a ton the police can do in some to...

        So I am going to say we are both right here. You’re correct, my tone definitely was accusatory and negative towards police, and as you point out, there isn’t a ton the police can do in some to most cases. However, I think a neutral-tone version of my statement still holds true: Police struggle for many reasons with abuse cases, some which are out of their control, so it makes sense that they are going to struggle at least the same amount if not more with cases where the trademark abuse evidence isn’t always indicative of abuse.

        2 votes
        1. ThatFanficGuy
          Link Parent
          I may be blind here, but – no, not really. BDSM (let's assume the most common quasi-abuse kink) is built around consent as paramount to the relationship's success. All the police have to do is ask...

          so it makes sense that they are going to struggle at least the same amount if not more with cases where the trademark abuse evidence isn’t always indicative of abuse.

          I may be blind here, but – no, not really. BDSM (let's assume the most common quasi-abuse kink) is built around consent as paramount to the relationship's success. All the police have to do is ask a straight question, and if the answer isn't equally-straight (like a confident "Yes, that's the kind of a relationship we're in")... well, the framework for handling genuine abuse isn't there, but at least one could know from the "Yes Means Yes" perspective.

          1 vote
  2. [4]
    Eva
    Link
    Way to make queers look good, them. them, a next-generation community platform, chronicles and celebrates the stories, people and voices that are emerging and inspiring all of us, ranging in...

    Way to make queers look good, them.

    them, a next-generation community platform, chronicles and celebrates the stories, people and voices that are emerging and inspiring all of us, ranging in topics from pop culture and style to politics and news, all through the lens of today’s LGBTQ community.

    You can tell it's a Condé Nast outlet because it's completely insensitive to whether or not it gives more ammunition for malicious actors to use against the queer community in lieu of profitability.

    2 votes
    1. [3]
      DepartedPretzel
      Link Parent
      Though I’ve also been suspect of the motives behind Condé Nast publishing them, I still think there’s valuable discussion to be had about this topic regardless of optics. Plus it’s not like kinks...

      Though I’ve also been suspect of the motives behind Condé Nast publishing them, I still think there’s valuable discussion to be had about this topic regardless of optics. Plus it’s not like kinks are exclusive to queer communities.

      2 votes
      1. [2]
        Eva
        Link Parent
        Exactly! So they should put it in another of their billion magazines—kinks (and especially abuse) shouldn't be associated with queers without reason.

        Exactly! So they should put it in another of their billion magazines—kinks (and especially abuse) shouldn't be associated with queers without reason.

        4 votes