GormanFletcher's recent activity
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Comment on What have you been eating, drinking, and cooking? in ~food
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Comment on <deleted topic> in ~talk
GormanFletcher LinkDuring college a professor had us do the True Colors test, then break off into groups based on our "type" and give a brief presentation. My classmates seemed to feel that the people in their...During college a professor had us do the True Colors test, then break off into groups based on our "type" and give a brief presentation. My classmates seemed to feel that the people in their groups were reasonably similar to themselves, and I felt the groups I was ranked highest in were clearly better fits for me than the groups I was ranked lowest in.
StrengthsFinder is a popular one in corporate circles, as it's geared towards more concrete traits that could affect workplace behavior.
I've taken some other personality tests over the years, and they're fun exercises, but they all come with the notorious caveat that they have similar self-fulfillment and could-apply-to-anyone problems as horoscopes. I haven't seen anyone put them to practical use.
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Comment on How open should I be with potential employers about my mental illness struggles? in ~health
GormanFletcher Link ParentI'm still new to this topic, but the gist I've found so far boils down to identifying what's happening in your life that involves constant background stressors, or what takes constant effort to...I'm still new to this topic, but the gist I've found so far boils down to identifying what's happening in your life that involves constant background stressors, or what takes constant effort to handle, and then getting away from that stuff for a long while.
For me, the triggers are stress because my autism makes my people skills too weak to feel confident about my social status in a context where that affects my financial security, and the effort of staying focused and engaged with the never-ending stream of tasks I'm not naturally interested in or have grown bored of. Other autistic people report it's sitting under the fluorescent lights all day, or suppressing their desire to stim, or the constant office chatter.
My understanding is that autistic people can't endure these things over a long period as well as a non-autistic person can, and eventually the brain just gets exhausted and gives up. E.g., lots of people get bored of what they're working on ("that's why it's called work!"), but trying to just accept it as a fact of life like other people do ground me down until I was in a very dark place. But arriving there was a very gradual process. I held out just fine for a while. As I slowly became more and more psychologically fatigued, it was hard to tell why common life/work situations were becoming such an effort. And not yet having my autism diagnosis to guide me, I didn't understand why I struggled so much with things everyone else just sucked it up and dealt with.
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Comment on How open should I be with potential employers about my mental illness struggles? in ~health
GormanFletcher Link ParentI did out my problem to one employer I was already with, but thereafter I brought it up with new employers during the interview process, coming on board part-time from the start explicitly for my...I did out my problem to one employer I was already with, but thereafter I brought it up with new employers during the interview process, coming on board part-time from the start explicitly for my mental health. One employer in particular was glad for my desire to work part-time: they had a variety of maintenance tasks they needed a skilled hand for, but couldn't justify pulling their full-time people off of their higher priority projects.
This is where having professional connections can help. I got one of these jobs because I'd previously given a presentation about a technology I'd been working with at the local Meetup. When I later interviewed with someone who frequented the meetup, the interview was just a formality: they'd already seen I was competent from the presentation, and we were just establishing whether the opportunity was a mutual fit. I got another job because someone I'd worked with got a new role and wanted me to join him. He'd liked me enough at our previous position that he was glad to have me, even part-time.
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Comment on How open should I be with potential employers about my mental illness struggles? in ~health
GormanFletcher LinkI've been open with several employers about my mental health issues, including several jobs where I arranged to work 1/2 - 3/4 time or hourly because I couldn't handle steady 8-hour days. I...I've been open with several employers about my mental health issues, including several jobs where I arranged to work 1/2 - 3/4 time or hourly because I couldn't handle steady 8-hour days. I recommend being open - mental health struggles are already a big deal without the additional burden of having to ignore your needs so you can pass for "normal".
My bosses generally wanted to help however they could, though they didn't always know how, so I had to be explicit about what you need from them. Working part-time was exactly what I needed at the time, so that's what my advice is oriented around, but my employers were willing to help in other ways if they could. Savvy employers are also deliberate about how they handle you because depression is a protected class under the ADA.
I work in tech, and these were tech jobs with mid-level or senior titles. Tech never advertises part-time work, but you can find it with networking (meetups, former colleagues). Some teams are always looking to snatch up talent, and will create an opening for a compelling individual.
The biggest challenges I faced:
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Working part-time, you might get assigned all the less appealing tasks, since the "good" ones go to people who can work all day and attend all the meetings. That's a less demanding role, which is good if you're limited by your mental health, but it's less fun, more expendable, and doesn't puff up your resume. Sometimes your boss won't know what to do with you -- what tasks are low-urgency, low-collaboration, but worth paying someone to do -- so be prepared to offer up suggestions.
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No one will hold your boundaries for you. If you can't sustain more than X daily hours, never make exceptions; if you don't look like you take your limits seriously, nobody around you will take them seriously either. And then people will get upset when you finally try to hold your boundaries. Be especially wary of this happening if you're assigned the "good" tasks, since people are less accommodating when they're counting on you for something important.
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Be careful of the fine line between filling your employer in on your needs, and becoming too intimate with colleagues about what you're going through. I have trouble saying 'no' to people I've bonded with, and mental health in the workplace is all about saying 'no' firmly and frequently. You also want to be able to ask for accommodations and get them without having an armchair psychology session first, where your needs may be invalidated by someone who cares but doesn't understand.
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If you work part-time, you probably don't get benefits, so you're double-dinged on the pay cut.
Lastly, in case it helps somebody reading: if you've struggled with untreatable depression and anyone's ever jokingly wondered if you had autism/Asperger's, get tested, then see if "autistic burnout" is a match for your experiences. It took me far too many years to come across that.
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I've been getting use out of my new rice cooker. The trick is to not just make plain white rice, but to season it, and then fry some eggs in the cooker too. Then it's a complete dish with nothing to clean up but the rice cooker bowl.
I've been adding chicken bouillion, fish oil, MSG, red pepper flakes, sesame oil, salt, minced onion, and minced garlic into the pot. When pot clicks, I pack the rice off to the side, crack in a couple eggs, and scramble them, then stir it all together and add some soy sauce and sriracha.
It's cheap and filling, and pretty low-effort as far as home-cooked food goes.