Moving to Raleigh, NC
Hello fellow Tildians,
I'm considering a move from Northern Virginia (NoVa) to Raleigh, NC, and would love some insight from those familiar with the area. I'm in my 20s and curious about the scene down there.
Although I haven’t spent much time in NoVa, one of the main reasons I’m looking at Raleigh is that NoVa feels like it has a more transient population. There's nothing inherently wrong with that (and I realize I’m contributing to it myself), but I’m hoping for something with more rooted connections.
How easy is it to make friends or date in Raleigh? I know it’s a broad question, but if anyone has lived in both places and can compare, that would be super helpful!
Additionally, are there any neighborhoods or locations I should avoid? I’m considering purchasing a home but want to stay within 15-20 minutes of Raleigh.
Any insights or advice would be greatly appreciated!
I grew up in North Raleigh, about 20 minutes from downtown. It was a pleasant suburb with a good mix of people and a decent amount to do. Greenways, parks, arts, sports, meetups, etc.
I never had luck with dating at that time in my life, but I think that's on me. I remember it as a friendly place and I might move back with my family some day.
You'll probably want to avoid downtown for housing, it's rather expensive for what it is.
Currently living in NE Raleigh, just outside I-540. It's just far enough from the crazy city traffic to feel cozy, yet I'm still less than 5 minutes from any necessity (grocery, bar, gas station, restaurants) and 10 minutes from the less frequent but still important things (Target, Best Buy, Theater) and you're about 20 minutes from Crabtree Mall. Fiber internet is basically everywhere, and you'll never be lacking a driver for things like DoorDash or Uber. (Though that last sentence likely applies to everywhere in the Raleigh area.) @tarehart mentioned the greenway and parks already - they really are nice, and I walk my dog there every day. Lots of cicadas, woodpeckers, owls, hawks, and some pretty brazen deer. I strongly considered carrying peanuts on walks to befriend some crows but my life schedule isn't regular enough for such a thing.
It's a more elderly population, so you being in your 20s and trying to join the dating scene seems like it could be tough, but with the abundance of highways converging on Raleigh you're 15 minutes from Wake Forest, 25 from Cary/Apex, etc.
The southern side of Raleigh, at least closer to NC State, has a population much closer to your age but the roads and traffic drive me up the wall. I flat out refuse to visit friends in that area, but you may be less sensitive to that kind of frustration.
edit - I would also strongly suggest looking at Apex. It's small, but very loving and open-minded. Downtown is like 4 or 5 blocks on a single road, and it's always full of people just enjoying life. There's an amazing ice cream place, great food, and they have annual festivals like Beerfest and Porkfest (might be getting those names wrong) where local businesses set up booths and food trucks. Very family-oriented and I saw people of all ages during my few years living there. If the location of my family wasn't a concern I would still be living there now.
I have family in Apex, its nice but getting expensive fast. That's probably not a problem for a North VAer, but that's probably the reason it's getting so expensive haha
Whether you like Raleigh will depend on who you are. I hate it here. I moved from Asheville, which I loved, for sordid reasons. Everything is extra expensive and really bland. Our unofficial motto is “Boring As Fuck.” Architecture is contemporary and beige. Lousy transit. Not terribly bike friendly. A lot of small parks, but only one large natural area and it’s next to the airport. I see a lot of geeky twenty something’s around, so it must have something for them. A lot of teslas. There are like three restaurants I enjoy, and one of them is shockingly pricy for what you get. We do have an H mart which is pretty cool.
Durham, nearby, is somewhat better. Richmond, closer to you, looks way better to me. And damn they have some excellent food options. Of course Asheville is the best, but it can be hard to make a living there.
Triangle has a ton of biotech and regular tech jobs, that's probably why you see a ton of geeky 20 somethings. Also I wouldn't say "boring as fuck" is our motto, I know plenty of people who are very happy to live here.
I've been living in the Raleigh area for around 5 years now, and I grew up in NC. The triangle is pretty spread out and not very dense, at least most of it is. I'm not much of a partier or anything so I enjoy the quieter "big city' life and all the greenways and nature we have access to. If you like cities it may not be your thing though.
Any advice on "avoiding" neighborhoods is completely subjective and up to personal preferences, but there are traditionally poorer and more rural areas that have struggled with crime historically. Personally I wouldn't choose to live in most places in the South East area of the city (Knightdale, Garner, etc) and I wouldn't want to live anywhere near RDU just because of the airplane traffic. Those may not be concerns for you though.
Been living in Raleigh for a year now, along with my wife who's lived here for about 8 years. I'm enjoying myself a lot, having missed all the activity in the nowhere town in Kansas I moved from. And my wife enjoys the area a lot, too. There's a lot of events going on, she says they're generally good to meet people if you're cool with just going up and talking to randos.
Asked her about living in Raleigh, and she said:
I've only lived in Raleigh for a couple of years and have never lived in "NoVa", but I can at least speak to my immediate experience. A solid chunk of Raleigh are transplants from other areas of the country and, as such, my experience has been that everyone is sort of in the same boat, looking for friends. There are a ton of Meetup.com events to attend as well as a Discord group (formed from the subreddit) that continually gets small groups together to do things, from karaoke nights to trivia nights and that makes it easier to get out and meet people. Board game groups are especially more common here than other places I've lived. If you want links to the Raleigh Discord group (it should be listed on the subreddit, too) and the Triangle Developers Discord/Slack group, feel free to PM me and I can send you the invites.
I'll echo what @OBLIVIATOR said, regarding personally not wanting to live in most places to the South East area of the city. I think this is a pretty common sentiment, and when I was looking for houses, I wasn't very impressed with those areas. I live about 20 minutes directly North of Raleigh and find it super convenient. Rarely do I have to drive more than 15-20 minutes to get to anything I want to do, including both downtown Durham and downtown Raleigh.
If you want to live in a lively and funky smaller town area, then Durham is better than Raleigh. There are parts of Raleigh that are nice and parts are comparable to NoVA. I've lived in both places and grew up in Raleigh. Keep in mind that with NCSU, UNC, Duke, NCA&T, Meredith College, Peace University, Shaw, St. Aug's, and other local universities, there are neighborhoods around the Triangle area that are very transient. I used to really love it here. It's gotten very congested in the past 5 yrs, perhaps from people who relocated here during Covid? I'd take it over NoVA any day, though. If I could snap my fingers and live anywhere in the areas now, it probably would be Hillsborough. It retains the funky small town feel that has fallen off in a lot of the other towns/cities in the area. It may not be aligned with what you seek, though.