CrypticCuriosity629's recent activity
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Comment on Finland offers a glimpse of the hurdles Chinese electric vehicle makers face in winning over Europe – consumers ask whether the cars spy on them, or if they have kill switches in ~transport
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Comment on Finland offers a glimpse of the hurdles Chinese electric vehicle makers face in winning over Europe – consumers ask whether the cars spy on them, or if they have kill switches in ~transport
CrypticCuriosity629 (edited )Link ParentNot just Europe, all across the western world. I've been trying to shout it from the rooftops over the years that the US in particular is literally turning into the exact thing that anti-China...Not just Europe, all across the western world.
I've been trying to shout it from the rooftops over the years that the US in particular is literally turning into the exact thing that anti-China propaganda has said that China was guilty of.
And it's like sure, you can argue that China is a surveillance police state, but at least they get the benefits of a benevolent police state. Their population exists without as much anxiety and struggle over like basic survival and at least they get positive benefits such as public safety, online decency, and a baseline quality of life where even if you're dirt poor and homeless there's still some dignity left. And generally the population isn't out there feeling oppressed and discarded, and most of them believe that the government takes care of them.
Meanwhile the US's police state is heading towards a dystopian hellscape of oppressive corporate feudalism where no one feels safe or taken care of and it feels like the quality of life and happiness here is just plummeting into the depths with no end in sight. Sure, you can stretch that the Chinese citizens are oppressed but brainwashed, but christ sometimes I WISH I was fucking brainwashed so I wouldn't be as depressed and stressed out all the time.
Obviously there's a lot of nuance to the above statements that I didn't get into, but I'm writing a comment on tildes, not a dissertation on police states. lol
At this point it's almost farcical how many people seem to be so pre-occupied with anti-China propaganda that they're failing to notice how the world around them is starting to look exactly like the anti-China propaganda they're so terrified of.
In the words of Saul Goodman: Misdirection!
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Comment on Flathub bans AI-coded apps – with some exceptions in ~tech
CrypticCuriosity629 (edited )Link ParentOff the top of my head here are some solutions: CLI problem: Create an "AI Warning" flag or env var that warns if a flatpak used AI through metadata. Allow the user to make it default or not....Off the top of my head here are some solutions:
CLI problem: Create an "AI Warning" flag or env var that warns if a flatpak used AI through metadata. Allow the user to make it default or not.
Verification problem: Initial verification is self reported, but outsource later verification to the community. Have "verified" and "unverified" tags in Flathub, allow users to opt in into seeing "unverified" apps with a disclaimer understanding the risks. Also you can use non-AI algorithms to score and fingerprint code that take into account a multitude of factors like the format of the comments, amount and type of typos/mistakes/bugs, the order of blocks, etc.
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Comment on Flathub bans AI-coded apps – with some exceptions in ~tech
CrypticCuriosity629 Link ParentYeah I don't know what the issue with labeling apps that have used AI is, and allowing people to filter out results based on that. Unfortunately I do think this spells the beginning of the end of...Yeah I don't know what the issue with labeling apps that have used AI is, and allowing people to filter out results based on that.
Unfortunately I do think this spells the beginning of the end of Flathub, because I have heard from so many developers even before AI that the process of getting their flatpak was already notoriously difficult and a pain in their ass, that this is just going to make them not want to support flatpak at all.
And because the bar is low as ever it will be because of AI, this hurdle creates a newd for an unrestricted community run FlatHub alternative with less restrictions. Which probably won't be good for anybody.
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Comment on Behind the ‘Supergirl’ bomb: competing cuts, creative differences in ~movies
CrypticCuriosity629 Link ParentNot sure what's up with all the Gunn hate recently. I saw the movie and I can really tell the push and pull between Gunn and someone else, and I think the Gunn parts were strongest. As for being a...Not sure what's up with all the Gunn hate recently.
I saw the movie and I can really tell the push and pull between Gunn and someone else, and I think the Gunn parts were strongest.
As for being a filmmaker friendly space, that's not the same as being a bad cut space.
Gunn has a natural talent of being in tune with audiences and fans and the source material. In his comic book movies he doesn't just change things from the source material for the hell of it, and when he does change things he justifies it and ties it together to have cohesive meaning within the narrative.
A lot of filmmakers tend to diverge from the source material solely because they want to put their fingerprints on the movie or because they're overly concerned with what will or won't translate from comics to film, this is when you get bizarre one dimensional changes that make no narrative sense and don't really improve anything.
I can see the push and pull between those two approaches in this film and I think it suffers from that.
I also got this weird sense watching the movie that Craig Gillespie was trying to emulate a Gunn movie without fundamentally understanding what makes a Gunn movie a Gunn Movie.
And even just looking at Craig Gillespie's filmography he seems like an absolutely bizarre choice of director for this film. Frankly if I was Gunn I wouldn't take any director who's done recycled character cash grab Disney movies like Cruella seriously.
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Comment on Climate.us is a new website created by former NOAA employees who worked on Climate.gov until they were laid off last year as part of the heinous DOGE cutbacks in ~enviro
CrypticCuriosity629 Link ParentAs part of my industry and my natural tech-oriented nature, I was interested in AI and LLM research when they started popping up in 2021/2022. Not out of an "AI Bro" interest, but more of the...As part of my industry and my natural tech-oriented nature, I was interested in AI and LLM research when they started popping up in 2021/2022. Not out of an "AI Bro" interest, but more of the computer science and applications interest. I started hosting my own models, trained my own models, and interacted with LLMs to get a feel of their capabilities and limitations and how they work.
It's given me a good baseline to understanding the capabilities of LLMs and also their fingerprinting, and even though the tech has advanced, there's still subtle fingerprinting I can spot from having interacted with AI. This includes video, images, text, and code. AI has idiosyncrasies that are easy to spot if you know what to look for.
But I have found that those who are anti-AI are extremely bad at being able to tell what's been created with AI or not precisely because of their aversion to AI in the first place.
I started seeing it with a lot of friends in the past several years, they will be openly against AI, but then share things that were obviously AI created.
And even more frustrating, is the opposite which is where I'd have my friends claim something was created or generated with AI when they were obviously not.
What really gets me is that AI is only really an issue under capitalism and especially late stage capitalism, and there's a lot of people who I know are pretty anti-capitalist who seem to be getting tricked into supporting capitalism through their protest of AI.
The issues with AI all lead back to capitalism and the capitalist systems that are trying to exploit AI. LLMs started out as a part of non-profit research and got exploited by capitalist billionaires to cut the working class, creatives, and others, out of the capitalism they enjoy.
I feel like a lot of people when it comes to AI and art and jobs, they accidentally start validating exploitative capitalism by focusing so hard on being anti-AI instead of anti-Capitalism. Because people are practically begging to go back to old-fashioned pre-AI era exploitation, instead of trying to find ways to restructure everything so they won't get exploited at all.
I have a pretty bad migraine, so I apologize if anything here wasn't super clear.
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Comment on Slate Truck preorder starts at $24,950 in ~transport
CrypticCuriosity629 Link ParentI use wireless android auto precisely so I don't have to take my phone out of my pocket and forget it in my car all the time though. HahaI use wireless android auto precisely so I don't have to take my phone out of my pocket and forget it in my car all the time though. Haha
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Comment on Slate Truck preorder starts at $24,950 in ~transport
CrypticCuriosity629 Link ParentWell damn. I use android auto a LOT. As in everything from maps to controlling my audiobooks on long drives. That's unfortunate that there's no headunit for even just something like navigation.Well damn.
I use android auto a LOT. As in everything from maps to controlling my audiobooks on long drives.
That's unfortunate that there's no headunit for even just something like navigation.
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Comment on Slate Truck preorder starts at $24,950 in ~transport
CrypticCuriosity629 LinkThis is the most cyberpunk vehicle I think I've ever seen. As in it reminds me of some of the low cost vehicle options in Cyberpunk 2077.This is the most cyberpunk vehicle I think I've ever seen.
As in it reminds me of some of the low cost vehicle options in Cyberpunk 2077.
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Comment on Burnout, A(u)DHD, and what next in my life & career? in ~life
CrypticCuriosity629 Link ParentYeah I'm planning to have a talk with my boss/owner of the company who is honestly a pretty laid back and understanding person. I am wondering if I can do a part time role as opposed to full time....a) see if you can try it out in a limited fashion while still employed. That way you can fall back on your employment if things don't necessarily work out.
Yeah I'm planning to have a talk with my boss/owner of the company who is honestly a pretty laid back and understanding person. I am wondering if I can do a part time role as opposed to full time. That way I'm not entirely surviving off of freelancing.
The only problem is my current employment contract says I can't do outside work that could compete with this business. I had to get it revised when I was hired to even allow me to sell 3D Printed stuff on Etsy. But again, the HR person is the one who militantly pushes that, not really my boss/owner.
I know they'd prefer it if I just did the freelancing stuff I plan to do, just internally for them, but my strategy is a lot different than how I'm expected to work and my abilities and freedom to manage a job are limited by the shop's capabilities.
b) if things seem to fly, incorporate. Not sure how things work where you are. But, here it is much more beneficial to run a business as a limited liability company than to "just" be self employed. YMMV. This will probably involve having to do a bunch of extra work (eg. accounting, salary payments, taxes etc). For me that was worth it though.
100%! In fact, I'll need to incorporate with a resale permit if I want to get discounted broker pricing and access to trade printers, so that's definitely one of the first things I'll have to do if I go out on my own for print. Luckily my grandmother's an accountant so I've picked up a lot of stuff growing up with her.
Out of curiosity, what are the other benefits of an LLC where you are? I'm in Washington, but I am also thinking about moving down to Oregon.
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Comment on Burnout, A(u)DHD, and what next in my life & career? in ~life
CrypticCuriosity629 Link ParentHonestly I think this helps a lot because it validates exactly how I've started to feel coming into work every day. So thank you for that and thank you for sharing your experience as well!I've found any workplace needs me to consume a huge amount of energy just to exist in it, aside from the work itself, which is why I've made a major push for staying remote. I don't have the words to express how it's turned something that's like an existential horror into reasonable and manageable work.
Honestly I think this helps a lot because it validates exactly how I've started to feel coming into work every day.
So thank you for that and thank you for sharing your experience as well!
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Comment on Does generative AI have a natural limit without a major innovation? in ~comp
CrypticCuriosity629 LinkI know this topic's old, but it just popped up to the top so I wanted to add my two cents here as well. I don't think the future is with LLMs only. I think the future is with large complex...I know this topic's old, but it just popped up to the top so I wanted to add my two cents here as well.
I don't think the future is with LLMs only. I think the future is with large complex harnesses of LLMs with each LLM basically acting as a neuron.
Once we create what amounts to an LLM that is trained entirely on efficient computer code as opposed to human language, and then wire those together into a complex network where each node works together with the nodes around it to adapt and specialize, I think that's when we'll start seeing more AGI.
Right now that's pretty high concept if you're only taking ChatGPT like LLMs into account.
I've been working with OpenClaw and Hermes, and those are a bit scary capable when compared to barebones LLMs. And extrapolating that kind of harness into a complex network of specialized LLMs starts to get scary when you think about it.
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Burnout, A(u)DHD, and what next in my life & career?
I've been thinking a lot lately about burnout, ADHD, autism, work, and where I go from here. My background is in entertainment design, print-focused graphic design, commercial printing, project...
I've been thinking a lot lately about burnout, ADHD, autism, work, and where I go from here.
My background is in entertainment design, print-focused graphic design, commercial printing, project management, production coordination, and over the years I've picked up a multitude of tech oriented skills with automation, software development and programming, mostly at hobby levels but still extremely useful.
I started out designing graphics for sets, props, and production, then gradually moved into the coordination and project management side by filling the gaps between creative teams, vendors, printers, clients, and production crews. Over time, that turned into a career built around helping complex visual and print projects move from idea to finished product. And I like it, I like being able to turn intangible ideas into reality.
But a lot of what has worn me down has not just been the workload itself. Print is stressful by nature, and I understand that. Deadlines move fast, clients change things, files come in wrong, and problems have to be solved quickly.
What has worn me down more is the pressure to work in a way that does not match how I work best, while also being hired for skills that depend on me seeing systems differently in the first place.
A major part of my career, especially as I moved into coordination and project management, has been my ability to understand systems, notice inefficient workflows, and find ways to improve them. I tend to see where information gets lost, where effort is duplicated, where confusion is being created, and where a better structure would help everyone.
A lot of this has actually stemmed from me adapting to my ADHD to create frictionless workflows for myself to help myself manage my life. But it translates well into systems and workflow because I understand where that friction is for a lot of people and how things get missed.
The frustrating pattern is that I often get hired partly because a company wants better organization, better workflows, better communication, or more efficient processes. Then when I start identifying those issues and trying to improve them, the follow-through fades.
Management may not fully support the changes. The existing culture may push back. Or one coworker who is deeply embedded in the company reacts badly and turns the situation into a conflict.
Eventually, I end up being pressured to operate inside the same inefficient workflow that was causing problems to begin with. Then I start looking ineffective in the exact environment I was hired to help improve.
That is where ADHD and autism make the struggle especially difficult. It is not that I cannot work hard or solve complex problems. I can. But when a workplace is unclear, reactive, socially political, inconsistent, or resistant to process improvement, I spend a huge amount of energy just trying to function inside it.
Then the anxiety builds. I start worrying that I'm going to be blamed, misunderstood, pushed out, or fired, even when I'm trying to help.
The hilariously frustrating thing is that I used to have Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria from relationships stemming from my ADHD, I would get anxious and paranoid when sensing a change in behavior patterns or tone or whatever, and I am very happy to say I have overcome that in my relationships and am much more secure. HOWEVER, in a hilariously frustrating turn of events, those exact rejection sensitive dypshoria senses have moved entirely to work. And I start panicking at a manager's tone change, or email.
I get in this mindset of expecting to be fired at any moment, where I can hear and see my manager pulling me in to give me "the talk" before being let go.
And frankly I think that burns me out more than anything.
Like right now in this current job, I was hired to improve the processes and inefficiencies, because the print shop I'm working at is using software literally from 2001 all run on ancient Windows 7 computers and has been unsupported for over 15 years, and their process is so painstakingly inefficient that I was hired precisely because they knew.
However here I am 6 months into the job, and I haven't even touched any process improvements and I am now expected to work entirely off of paper and a 25 year old unsupported software, both of which is so far away from my skillset and how I function that I'm struggling every day just to keep up.
Meanwhile, the HR woman who is also a project manager, has outright refused any process improvement and has forced me to work EXACTLY like she does. She's forced me to use her spreadsheet, she's forced me to handwrite everything(I have dysgraphia too, I struggle writing by hand but typing is second nature). She has thrown me under the bus. I created a synced spreadsheet using Microsoft 365 so we didn't have to send emails with spreadsheets every single night that clogs up our inboxes, and she just straight up said "I'm not using that." I can't even search through my emails for client or project keywords because it picks up her daily "Schedule" emails because her spreadsheet has an archive sheet with 20 years worth of jobs and clients. Every time I search my email I have to sift through 100s of her daily schedule emails, and I've been told I'm not allowed to delete them in case we ever need to go back.
Meanwhile I have been self hosting ERPNext and on my own time wrote a custom Printing App with custom forms for estimating, jobs, and project management, even tracking equipment maintenance, to mimic our current workflow as closely as possible while keeping everything digital and consolidated, yet nobody seems interested in that.
So now I'm coming into work every day, struggling to be functional, and questioning if it's me, the job, or what. And it's frustrating that this has happened at just about every single job I've had since 2020.
I have real experience and real value. I've worked across graphic design, commercial printing, production, prepress, project management, account management, estimating, vendor coordination, branding, marketing support, workflow systems, and automation.
I know how print projects go wrong. I know how to prepare files, coordinate specs, communicate with printers, work with clients, manage production details, and help avoid expensive mistakes.
That is part of why I've started seriously thinking about freelance work, print brokerage, design support, print consulting, and workflow automation.
On paper, it feels like it could make sense. It would let me build something around the parts of the work I know I'm good at: helping people plan print projects, prepare files correctly, source vendors, manage production details, improve workflows, automate repetitive tasks, and make the process less confusing.
I'd also get to manage my own time, my own processes without being judged or worried about being fired. I have so many ideas on finding clients, helping clients, and I've got skillsets that would set me apart from my competition.
I see a need for design teams and people to need help with print, because I've worked with so many clients in my jobs that struggle with what comes second nature to me. And because schools seem to always teach how Print is dying, the majority of graphic designers know very very little about how to design effectively for print, which a lot of my career has been geared towards helping.
The part I'm unsure about is whether this is a real next step or just another big ADHD idea that feels urgent because I'm burned out.
I know I'm capable. That isn't really the question. The question is whether going out on my own would actually give me the room to use those skills in a healthier way, or whether I'd end up running into the same patterns without the safety net of a regular job.
That is the part that makes me hesitate. Freelancing feels like it could be a way to finally build work around how I function best, but it also feels uncertain and risky. If the same issues around anxiety, conflict, communication, or feeling unsupported still show up, I would be dealing with them on my own.
So I'm trying to be realistic without talking myself out of something that might actually help. I can't keep going the way I have been. I feel burned out and stuck, and this idea feels just practical enough and just uncertain enough that I keep coming back to it.
If anyone has experience with freelancing, print brokerage, consulting, ADHD/autism in the workplace, burnout, or building a career around a skillset that does not fit neatly into traditional jobs, I'd appreciate your perspective.
I'm especially interested in hearing from people who have made some version of this work. Not in a "just quit your job and follow your dreams" way, but in a realistic way. What helped? What did you have to figure out? What made it sustainable?
I could use advice, but honestly, I could also use some encouragement and success stories from people who have been in a similar place and found a way forward.
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Comment on Anyone have any experience with tiny screws? I need to replace two in my body hair trimmer and I don't know where to start. in ~life.home_improvement
CrypticCuriosity629 LinkHmm I wonder why no one has recommended to go to the manufacturer and request replacements. I've done this dozens of times. Most of the time you just pay for shipping. You do sometimes have to...Hmm I wonder why no one has recommended to go to the manufacturer and request replacements. I've done this dozens of times. Most of the time you just pay for shipping.
You do sometimes have to contact the right person, because most call center level customer service won't know wtf you're talking about and will just read from a script and will short circuit if you ask anything their script hasn't prepared them for. So ask for the actual tech department or repair center and don't take no for an answer. Lol.
Most of the time they're happy to send spare parts like screws.
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Comment on What programming/technical projects have you been working on? in ~comp
CrypticCuriosity629 LinkI'm chugging away on my homelab hyperfixation! I bought a chinese motherboard from Aliexpress for $50 and got a used Intel Xeon CPU E5-4628L V4 off ebay as well as an Nvidia Quadro P1000 GPU. All...I'm chugging away on my homelab hyperfixation!
I bought a chinese motherboard from Aliexpress for $50 and got a used Intel Xeon CPU E5-4628L V4 off ebay as well as an Nvidia Quadro P1000 GPU. All for less than $100 total, so I'm happy about that.
I'm going to be rebuilding my NAS/Media Streaming server inside my homelab rack with this new hardware, so it'll give me a far better overhead on media transcoding.
I also got ERPNext running on an old Mac Mini that I'll be adding to my homelab, and I've been writing a custom app for small commercial print shops to use as their MIS system and project management system.
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Comment on Jumping spiders shouldn’t be this smart in ~science
CrypticCuriosity629 LinkI watched this video a few weeks ago and I LOVED it. It's exactly the kind of content I look for on YouTube and in a format that I love which mixes real experiences, scientist/expert interviews,...I watched this video a few weeks ago and I LOVED it. It's exactly the kind of content I look for on YouTube and in a format that I love which mixes real experiences, scientist/expert interviews, visual references, and isn't monotonous.
And it's why I love learning about these things. It is such a gift to be able to now look at a jumping spider and understand a bit better about how it sees the world around it.
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Comment on Landmark German ruling declares Google's AI Overviews are Google's own words and makes it liable for false answers in ~tech
CrypticCuriosity629 LinkThis sounds like common sense. Companies are generally liable for the content they put on their websites, which is partly why social media removed harmful or illegal content. Why would AI be any...This sounds like common sense.
Companies are generally liable for the content they put on their websites, which is partly why social media removed harmful or illegal content.
Why would AI be any different?
Plus, ultimately this should be considered a great thing because it forces innovation into accuracy as opposed to complacency with mediocre inaccuracy.
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Comment on "The therapeutic industry is platonic prostitution" in ~health.mental
CrypticCuriosity629 Link ParentWhat is hard for me personally is that if I were the one opening up about something complicated and someone only responded with “that really sucks,” or something akin to that, I would probably...What is hard for me personally is that if I were the one opening up about something complicated and someone only responded with “that really sucks,” or something akin to that, I would probably experience that as dismissive or impersonal. To me, something like that can feel like a conversation-ender rather than real engagement, or something someone says with low effort disinterest.
Which is probably why it's not a coincidence that that was basically the point I was making: people, including myself, approach these conversations from very different perspectives, experiences, wounds, and levels of self-awareness. What feels like useful nuance to one person can feel dismissive to another.
And without a person directly and clearly communicating "This is what I need right now, this is what I do not need" without any room for interpretation, it can be difficult to nail the right approach.
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Comment on "The therapeutic industry is platonic prostitution" in ~health.mental
CrypticCuriosity629 (edited )Link ParentI’m having a hard time coming up with a response to this in a way that I'm confident it won't come across as dismissive of your experience, even though that is not my intent. That is kind of my...I’m having a hard time coming up with a response to this in a way that I'm confident it won't come across as dismissive of your experience, even though that is not my intent. That is kind of my own "no matter how hard I try I'm afraid of not being understood" reflection here.
I had written a response to your post earlier, and I'm unsure if that was one that you considered dismissive, but frankly it wasn't intended that way, it is just my communication style. One of the hallmarks of having autism and ADHD is missing social ques and being too blunt, direct, or analytically trying to solve problems or help sharpen opinions or perspectives, all of which is something I'm guilty of when I let my guard down and miss the part of being sensitive of someone's emotions. It's also something I've had to consider about others when I perceive them as dismissive or malicious of my experience or something I've said, I could be misunderstanding them the same way I've been misunderstood by others.
With that being said I believe you when you say you have been hurt, misunderstood, and exhausted by years of trying to explain yourself. I also understand why the responses you received would feel especially painful if being misunderstood is already a deep trigger for you.
That said, I do think there is a distinction worth making between being attacked and receiving criticism. Someone saying your post came across as presumptuous is criticism. It may feel personal, and it may hurt, but that does not automatically make it a personal attack. Feeling attacked is a real emotional experience, but it is not always the same thing as someone actually attacking you.
I think part of the tension here is that your post came from a very personal place, but it also made broader claims about therapy, therapists, society, individualism, emotional labor, and the way people respond to suffering. Once something moves from “this has been my experience” into “this is what therapy is” or “this is what society is doing,” people are going to respond not only to your pain, but also to the conclusions you drew from it.
I also think people can be at very different stages in their mental health journey, and that affects what they are able to hear, both on your side and theirs.
Sometimes people responding to you may be speaking from realizations they had to work through in their own lives. If those realizations do not line up with where you are right now, they may sound like invalidation, even if that is not what they mean. And the reverse can also be true: some people may be reacting from places where they have not yet had the experience needed to understand what you are trying to say.
A good example is mindset. If someone is fully convinced that happiness is determined by outside circumstances, then being told that mindset matters can sound dismissive, like someone is saying “just think positive” or “your suffering is your fault.”
But that is not the actual point.
Outside circumstances obviously matter. Poverty, loneliness, trauma, abuse, unemployment, housing, health, and support systems all affect happiness. I do not think anyone should pretend those things are irrelevant.
But mindset still shapes how a person interprets those circumstances. It affects what options they can see, whether they notice opportunities, how they handle rejection, how much agency they believe they have, and whether they experience pain as temporary or as proof that nothing will ever change.
So two people can be talking about the same issue from totally different levels of experience. One person may be trying to describe a realization that took years to reach, while the other person hears it as invalidation because that realization does not feel true, useful, or accessible to them yet.
I also think it is worth being careful with the assumption that people who disagree with you are being defensive because you criticized something that worked for them. Some people probably were defensive. Some probably misunderstood you. But some may have understood your point and still disagreed with the way you framed it.
That is not necessarily tone-deafness. Sometimes it is just disagreement.
There is also a useful skill here that I have had to learn myself: taking what applies and disregarding what does not without taking it personally. I have ADHD and autism, and I know what it is like to be misunderstood even when I feel like I am being as direct and clear as possible. People still interpret things through their own assumptions, experiences, defensiveness, trauma, and biases. It is incredibly frustrating. I have compared it before to being stuck in an MMO where most people feel like NPCs, and finding someone who actually understands you feels rare.
So I get the exhaustion of feeling like, “I tried as hard as I possibly could to explain this, and people still did not get it.”
That does not mean you failed. It means the subject is emotionally loaded, and your post touched a lot of people’s own experiences with therapy, loneliness, support, and survival.
And with that, I’ll end with a quote that I have had to internalize through my own mental health journey, because it has helped me when I have gotten into a similar headspace:
It is possible to commit no mistakes and still lose. That is not a weakness. That is life.
- Jean-Luc Picard
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Comment on "The therapeutic industry is platonic prostitution" in ~health.mental
CrypticCuriosity629 (edited )LinkSo I apologize for not being as thorough as you were, however as someone who's a big advocate of therapy despite my difficulties finding therapists that know how to help me, I wanted to respond to...- Exemplary
So I apologize for not being as thorough as you were, however as someone who's a big advocate of therapy despite my difficulties finding therapists that know how to help me, I wanted to respond to some of the condensed points you make with counterpoints. If I'm off base on any of these let me know.
First of all as an overall counterpoint, the premise that therapy is simply talking and that that's something you can do with friends instead of a therapist is inherently flawed. There's a reason that people say not to use your friends, family, or partners as therapists, and to not consider your therapist a friend.
The thing is all humans are flawed, and therapists aren't all perfect, but at least they've had training and strict ethical boundaries in place that prevent harmful advice being given and how they should respond to harmful ideations of their patients. They are also trained to not let their own personal opinions get in the way. Your friends and family do not have those same boundaries or constraints. They might not have the tools to identify harmful advice, or their biases can subconsciously taint the advice they give you where it prioritizes things like their own comfort over your wellbeing.
I'm not saying don't ever try to talk to your friends and family about your problems, just that there's a huge difference between therapy and talking to your friends and family and they aren't the same things or have the same purpose.
The simple fact that people were around you all day every day meant that you got on with it and coped with things. You had a neighborhood or village or whatever in which friends and family lived and worked closely together every day. People to talk to all day.
Even in close-knit societies, people did not always just rely on friends and family for processing personal difficulties or problems. Most societies still had specific people who filled that role but called them elders, priests, shamans, monks, spiritual advisors, mentors, village leaders, or other respected figures.
People went to them because not every problem could be solved by casual community support. Some problems involved grief, shame, family conflict, trauma, fear, moral confusion, or major life decisions. Those were often taken to someone seen as wise, neutral, experienced, or spiritually authoritative.
That is not identical to modern therapy, but it is close enough to matter as analogous to how therapy is supposed to be used in our society. The role of “person outside your immediate circle who listens, guides, interprets, and helps you process difficult things” is not some modern invention. It has existed in different forms across societies for a very long time.
And sure, our society is more transactional, but that's because the people that general serve the rolls above need a place to live and be able to afford food.
In the non-transactional societies, the elders, priests, and shamans were often cared for by the community.
Point being, people need to eat and have a place to live, so therapists can't just offer that role freely in this society.
But I blame capitalism for that, not the therapists themselves.
Also, for me at least personally, I use therapy as a means to help me see issues from different angles, and to help solve problems. I don't consider my therapist a friend at all and I don't value their personal opinions of me or what I talk about (keyword being personal opinions, not professional opinions), they are a person who for 1 hour I can have their full attention and focus, who can listen and provide feedback and counterpoints to my internal thoughts and feelings.
Trust me, I'm a person who considers themselves extremely self-aware and who has a major issue intellectualizing his emotions, which is what has made finding therapists difficult, however I am consistently surprised that there are still new ways of looking at things that can end up being beneficial to me and my perspective on my life and trauma.
Ok, sorry I have to actually stop there, but I did want to post. I might add to this later, but that's as much as I currently have time to respond to.
That's only a huge problem with western views on markets though and only if you treat those concepts as rigid and un-adaptable.
We need to start looking at economics differently with new ideas because the thing no one seems to be talking about with the current state of capitalism in the west is that there IS going to be a limit to the concept "unlimited growth". Where that limit actually is is arguable, but there will be a limit where unlimited growth will stop making practical sense and systems will start to collapse entirely.