IndianaBonez's recent activity
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Comment on Hi, how are you? Mental health support and discussion thread (May 2026) in ~health.mental
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Comment on What are your food aversions? in ~food
IndianaBonez LinkMushy or slimy food. I've got a whole lot of other sensory issues besides food though. Applesauce, mashed potatoes, congee, mushrooms, and oysters. The smell of cooked mushrooms is also revolting...Mushy or slimy food. I've got a whole lot of other sensory issues besides food though.
Applesauce, mashed potatoes, congee, mushrooms, and oysters. The smell of cooked mushrooms is also revolting as it smells like athlete's foot to me.
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Comment on Queer temperature check: how is everyone doing right now? in ~lgbt
IndianaBonez LinkI'm not doing well. I only came out as trans a few months ago so everything is new and frustrating. I've been doing everything besides starting estrogen. Voice training, facial hair removal, new...I'm not doing well. I only came out as trans a few months ago so everything is new and frustrating. I've been doing everything besides starting estrogen. Voice training, facial hair removal, new name, etc. My appointment with an endocrinologist is coming up which is exciting but I'm getting more and more anxious about it as it gets closer. On days where I'm not dysphoric I start doubting myself if I'm really trans or just a femboy. All of the changes on estrogen sound appealing to me so why am I doubting myself so much?
I've neglected my voice training because I'm just too depressed to do it. I have no motivation to do it even though it's my biggest barrier from passing. Hoping my HRT will help with my dysphoria induced depression because this is genuinely awful right now.
I feel like complete trash and I hate being alive. I'm so god damn frustrated about my disability since I can't do anything by myself at this point thanks to my muscular dystrophy. I don't have any friends or family besides my mom who's taking care of me. There's no local groups for trans women where I live so I have no community to seek support. Online interaction is completely hollow because no one sees me as a disabled trans woman, all they hear is a masculine voice. Starting HRT was the best thing I've ever done for myself so why am I still so miserable?
I've been crying on and off the whole week, I don't know how to change anything. I've never gone to college or had a job. Never had a friend/lover as an adult. Never done anything remotely intimate with someone else. Forget kissing or having sex, I haven't even held hands with someone. I just want someone to fucking touch me.
I don't like being here to be honest. In fact, I always kind of resented being alive knowing what my future would be. Being born the wrong sex on top of that really makes me hate everything about myself. I've been extremely suicidal because I don't think things will ever improve. Why bother when my body is falling apart and no one seems to care about me. How do I tell people I'm not okay? Why was I put here if all I get to do is wither away? I wanted to do so much and I got to do none of it.