cheep_cheep's recent activity
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Comment on Does Tildes welcomes “self-promoting” links to personal blog posts? in ~tildes
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Comment on Popcorn! What's the best way to make it? in ~food
cheep_cheep Link ParentThis is my usual method, both to limit babysitting a pot on a stove and to minimize cleanup. The real hack I've learned is the type of kernel - I have purchased white corn from my local bulk food...This is my usual method, both to limit babysitting a pot on a stove and to minimize cleanup.
The real hack I've learned is the type of kernel - I have purchased white corn from my local bulk food store and blue corn from the upscale market. White corn is so much better than yellow corn, and blue corn is heavenly. I highly recommend either if you haven't tried them!
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Comment on Tilderinos who split after long (10–15 years) relationships: what led to it and how did it happen? in ~life.men
cheep_cheep Link ParentI've been in a few relationships like this - when people are hurt, or when it feels like one person is carrying more of the weight, or when people feel tired of trying anymore, that's usually not...I've been in a few relationships like this - when people are hurt, or when it feels like one person is carrying more of the weight, or when people feel tired of trying anymore, that's usually not a good sign. I have found that long-term relationships work when both people want to be in them, and both people are making an effort to show up, even when they don't feel like it. Both people need to want to meet in the middle as a starting point; if you don't, it's kind of hard to see how things go forward, unless you are both willing to maintain the status quo, which doesn't sound like the case. I think therapy can help a lot, and having an external mediator can unpack the resentment and frustration you both may be feeling while still keeping lines of communication open.
I'll say too that I have been in a couple of relationships where if I was vulnerable first, and I apologized first, and I made the initial overture to get things moving, they would come along eventually...but that also gets really old. The reason why those relationships ended up fizzling out was because I didn't want to deal with it anymore. I was doing all of the work. I think it's totally fair if you've reached the end of your road, but I would ask myself whether you're ok with that outcome as opposed to trying to make things work. Do you want to try again? Even if there is some discomfort and resentment getting the process started? Or are you totally done-done? Once you start breaking up, things can never really go back to how they were, but if you're already there, I don't think it's easy to change your mindset if you've already got one foot out the door.
I guess I'll say this - it's way easier in some ways to leave and cut loose than to try to fix things that aren't working great. Is this other person and your shared life worth it to you? Do you still care about them? If they were their best self right now, would that change your opinion on them and your relationship? Or, is it a case where you really just don't like this person anymore and it isn't worth it to you?
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Comment on What single episode of a show would you recommend as a standalone? in ~tv
cheep_cheep LinkMythic Quest S1E5 - "A Dark Quiet Death" I was flip flopping on whether I wanted to continue watching this show, since the first season is a little rough, in my opinion, but this one episode was...Mythic Quest S1E5 - "A Dark Quiet Death"
I was flip flopping on whether I wanted to continue watching this show, since the first season is a little rough, in my opinion, but this one episode was fantastic. The show is generally about the video game industry and the modern difficulties of making games as a large studio. This episode is a standalone and basically covers the life cycle of an indie game darling. It's such an incredible standalone episode, I was completely blown away. If you like video games at all, I highly, highly recommend it.
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Comment on Our AI midwife in ~health
cheep_cheep Link ParentThat's awesome that things worked out for you! I've had my own adventures trying to have a baby, it can be absolutely miserable. On one hand, I'm so happy for anyone that's able to figure out the...That's awesome that things worked out for you! I've had my own adventures trying to have a baby, it can be absolutely miserable. On one hand, I'm so happy for anyone that's able to figure out the root cause of why their bodies don't work as intended. I have a lot of very mixed feelings on American health care, and I was very, very fortunate to have great insurance that allowed me to diagnose my specific problems.
On the other hand, I read a story like this and I feel really perplexed. Why did this outcome happen this way? I definitely had hysteroscopies (with printout pictures...), plural. I would have guessed, especially with a history of fibroids, that the patient in the story should have had a hysteroscopy. Wouldn't they have had to do one to remove the fibroids?! I feel a little like perhaps the author is not 100% accurate, either from a lack of familiarity with medical terminology or perhaps willingly to make a better story, but the logic of the procedures done over six years just sounds very odd to me. Is part of this because treatment plans six+ years ago were bad, and we've learned a lot? Was their doctor a quack? I don't have a good answer, but at least one person in this saga feels like they made some kind of monster error. It bothers me, but I'm not sure exactly whom to be most bothered with.
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Comment on Our AI midwife in ~health
cheep_cheep LinkI have a lot of thoughts, and they're really long. I find this whole case really fascinating. I currently work in health care research (not in fertility), and I regularly interact with medical...- Exemplary
I have a lot of thoughts, and they're really long.
I find this whole case really fascinating. I currently work in health care research (not in fertility), and I regularly interact with medical doctors. My experience with them is that they all have their own comfort and philosophy on how to diagnose problems and how to go about doing this, but they all have great reverence for standard of care. The internet tells me that standard of care is a legal term...but in my specific segment of health care, it's also a medical term, referring to the types of tests and specific treatments that are most appropriate for different diagnoses, based on existing research and data. If I ever suggest inviting a patient to a study that a physician does not agree with, or thinks goes against standard of care and the reams of data supporting it, God help me. The physicians I work with keep up with research (and put patients on different studies), so they are constantly evolving their concepts of what standard of care is and what is likely going to be the standard of care in the near or distant future. They are not crusty hacks, they are thoughtful and careful.
I say this because I only started working in health care relatively recently, and I didn't totally understand how doctors came up with treatment plans, diagnostic tests, or labs. In my field, the doctors are trying to hew as closely to standard of care as possible, while also trying to minimize the amount of burden on the patients. This includes the number of trips into the office, the number of blood draws, the number of and types of imaging. They're not going to send you in for an MRI if an ultrasound shows you enough to make a clear diagnosis. They're also not going to order an MRI if you have a low-risk diagnosis that they don't have good reason to have concerns about, because that's a physical and financial burden on the patient. A lot of patients also get really stressed out if you start ordering them a lot of tests, so there's also an emotional burden, too.
The author of the article is American, and he says they spent oodles of money on fertility treatment. Fertility treatment is really expensive, and a lot of aspects of treatment are not covered by insurance, or you need additional insurance specifically for fertility procedures. The comments on the article are also really fascinating - there's a few radiologists that are baffled by the results. She had multiple ultrasounds. How on earth did they miss a 6 cm fibroid?! A few of them express that if nothing was coming up on these ultrasounds, it's reasonable - perhaps even standard of care - to expect that an MRI would not show anything different. If their doctor had ordered an MRI and it showed nothing, would that be considered an unnecessary, frivolous test? Would we be grumbling about the money-grubbing state of the fertility industry, which already makes money hand over fist? Was it reasonable to interpret, based on evidence and standard of care, that an MRI was not going to give additional information that was useful and financially reasonable to the patient?
In another twist, the author also leaves a comment that their doctors knew she had fibroids, and that she had surgery to remove some during this process. Her 6 cm problem fibroid also apparently was embedded in her uterine wall, so not necessarily visible from an ultrasound. (The commenting radiologists point out that a 6 cm fibroid is basically the size of a whole-ass uterus, so its specific form of presentation is a bit baffling - how did no one know it was there?!) The author also shares that if she had had a hysteroscopy, this might have also shown the fibroid clearly. I'm not a physician. I don't know what the fertility standard of care is, or when fibroids should show up on different kinds of imaging, especially if it's in the uterine wall. I know I've had imaging done of my uterus for polyps, and that they were considered a potential hindrance to successful pregnancy very early on when I was trying to get pregnant. If this couple went through six years of infertility treatment, how reasonable is it that they didn't get an MRI or a hysteroscopy?
Given my own experience in health care, I see this in a few of ways:
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The doctors were trying to follow their best standard of care, and the feedback they got did not indicate than an MRI or hysteroscopy would be useful. It was frustrating to have so many failed transfers. There are quite a lot of inexplicable cases where the doctors do not understand why pregnancy doesn't happen when it should. We do not fully understand the process of pregnancy - or why it ends unexpectedly. (Ask me how I know.) This is a case where a moonshot idea from an LLM, operating outside the standard of care, happened to have the right answer. It's not super likely that this will answer every person's problem, but it worked really well here.
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The doctors missed some critical information that should have indicated an MRI or hysteroscopy. (Especially a hysteroscopy.) These are common techniques that come up in fertility treatments and diagnosis, and one of these doctors should have recognized that one of these techniques could have helped rule out potential issues, especially since the patient had a history of fibroids. The doctors let their rigid thinking and training get in the way of being flexible, and missed a diagnosis that they should have made. LLMs should be consulted regularly to test for obvious gaps in thinking on the part of busy doctors.
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Women's health care, and in particular fertility treatments, are poorly researched and poorly understood. There is little effort to fund or support advances in the field, and couples who are diagnosed with infertility need to expend unreasonable amounts of time, energy, and money to attempt to treat, let alone successfully treat their infertility. Any edge to try and source solutions for these people should be supported and lauded.
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This couple had seemingly endless amounts of time and money to continuously ask an LLM why they were infertile. After literal years of prompting, speculating, and asking "what else?", they finally stumbled on a random answer that happened to be right. It's entirely dumb luck, and with enough time and attempts at solving the question they figured it out. This is not expedient or sensible for the vast majority of people.
I feel like all of them are true. But to me, it's a great general question of "what is the solution here?" Is this a model of what we should do going forward, and how health care needs to change? Or is it just really lucky? The physicians I know work very hard to try and treat each patient to the best of their ability; when treatments don't work, they get frustrated. When patients decline standard of care, if the physician is concerned that the patient is potentially leading themselves to major harm, they will have conversations, sometimes over the course of years, to try and change their minds so that they can do their best to keep them healthy. It often works. The physicians I know are not money-grubbing assholes, they care very deeply about their patients and are invested in giving them the best care possible. I don't know the situation with the author's doctors, but I personally would not be comfortable at all with an LLM superseding the process that the physicians use to diagnose and treat their patients at my clinic. They will absolutely respect when a patient rejects their proposed treatment, and they will consider when patients want a specific kind of test or treatment, but they will also tell them when taking ivermectin is not standard of care and they're not going to prescribe it.
TLDR: I don't think this is a straightforward case at all. It brings up a lot of questions for me about how doctors make diagnoses, how they do right by their patients, and when it's ethically appropriate to just do what the patient wants.
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Comment on Our AI midwife in ~health
cheep_cheep Link ParentIf you get an MRI and you have something the doctors want to monitor over time, you typically want to have them at short enough intervals that you can see how your imaging changes over time....If you get an MRI and you have something the doctors want to monitor over time, you typically want to have them at short enough intervals that you can see how your imaging changes over time. They'll usually prescribe MRIs 6 or 12 months apart so you can monitor changes in the body. 5 years is a really long time in imaging time.
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Comment on Our AI midwife in ~health
cheep_cheep Link ParentYes. I work in health care currently and there's a lot of reasons not to get an MRI (aside from the high cost): allergies to the contrast agent, limited kidney function that can have difficulty...Yes. I work in health care currently and there's a lot of reasons not to get an MRI (aside from the high cost): allergies to the contrast agent, limited kidney function that can have difficulty clearing the contrast agent, metallic implants or other medical devices, and claustrophobia are all reasons why an MRI are not indicated for patients that I've seen. Some patients also may have scoliosis or other physical issues that don't allow them to lie still - an MRI takes awhile, and it's not a trivial procedure, especially for older patients. Just this week, I saw a doctor decline an MRI for an older patient who was on the frail side - it's not a panacea. There's a reason why there are multiple imaging options.
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Comment on When do you know that you've found "the one"? in ~life
cheep_cheep Link ParentSadly, not a definitive criterion in my experience.Sadly, not a definitive criterion in my experience.
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Comment on When do you know that you've found "the one"? in ~life
cheep_cheep Link ParentNot sure if it's his original thought, but I have heard Dan Savage say it many times (and a variation on "all relationships end" or "a relationship that ends isn't necessarily a failed one, it's...Not sure if it's his original thought, but I have heard Dan Savage say it many times (and a variation on "all relationships end" or "a relationship that ends isn't necessarily a failed one, it's just a relationship").
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Comment on When do you know that you've found "the one"? in ~life
cheep_cheep Link ParentThis is really great insight! OP, I'm not sure where you are in life and relationships, but you don't necessarily have to get married, and I don't think everyone's relationship style or lifestyle...This is really great insight! OP, I'm not sure where you are in life and relationships, but you don't necessarily have to get married, and I don't think everyone's relationship style or lifestyle is necessarily suited to it.
For me, I wanted a person in my life with whom I could live with and be intimate with and make a family unit with. That doesn't require marriage, but I wanted a life partner. That also meant that I needed to find someone 1) that generally had similar interests, and that I enjoyed living and adventuring and talking with, 2) that I felt able to communicate with, and in particular able to disagree with, and 3) also wanted to be my life partner. I dated a few different people that failed critically on at least one of these points - I didn't feel able to disagree with a couple, and one just straight up did not listen to me, and one I found horrifically boring after a couple of years and I grew to actively dislike him. With all of the people I dated seriously, I felt committed to trying to make things work and only realized it wasn't working when some critically awful thing happened. I personally couldn't recognize when my love and effort weren't enough.
When I met my current husband, I had very low expectations initially. He was really cool and very easygoing, and he was also really supportive. There are times (now and also back then) where he could be really obstinate, or where it took multiple conversations to explain my feelings, but we were always able to get to a place where we understood each other, even if we didn't agree. We were both at places in our lives where we felt ready to be married, and I think that's also a really important criterion to marriage. When you feel ready to settle down and do the family thing, if you do, it's important to find a person that's also there. If I had met my spouse in my 20s, I don't think I would have been ready to settle down and likely would have polluted our relationship in some way. Timing was genuinely really important for me.
I don't think there's necessarily a way to know "the one". I've met some people I felt deeply connected with, and we are good friends, but personally I think there's a lot of other life mechanics that determine whether someone makes a good life partner/spouse. I agree with the adage that "love is not enough"; for me, both people need to be on the same page emotionally and try to be there for and support each other. It is an every day kind of thing, where you choose to be there and be supportive even when you might be tired and need a time out. I would recommend just doing the thing, live your life and see what happens.
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Comment on Anyone have any ketogenic diet stories? in ~food
cheep_cheep Link ParentInteresting! This is probably why there's a whole list of potential constipating foods - I would imagine a celiac would not want to eat bread, but there's probably a specific type of veg or fibre...Interesting! This is probably why there's a whole list of potential constipating foods - I would imagine a celiac would not want to eat bread, but there's probably a specific type of veg or fibre that would do the job just right. This is why I'm the ecologist and my sister is the dietician...
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Comment on How to get better at academic writing quickly? in ~humanities
cheep_cheep Link ParentI agree with all of this advice, it's really great and covers a lot of important fundamentals. Piggybacking off here: *The best way to get better at writing is to write. Most academic writing goes...I agree with all of this advice, it's really great and covers a lot of important fundamentals. Piggybacking off here:
*The best way to get better at writing is to write. Most academic writing goes through multiple drafts - you will have personal drafts, coauthor drafts, supervisor drafts, reviewer drafts...few people, if anyone, write beautiful academic papers from scratch. So don't put the pressure on yourself to write perfectly from the start. This may be where LLMs are tempting, but I really recommend that you put in the legwork yourself. The LLM doesn't need practice, you do. So you need to go through all the phases of writing as you.
*If you can, write with someone else. Do you have an opportunity to do a lab paper or work as a coauthor? Can you do peer review on behalf of your supervisor? This allows you to see how others write in the editing stage, and to see different examples of what other writers do. A lot of peer review drafts are not good. I still beat myself up when writing and then roll my eyes sometimes when I see what makes it into peer review. Reminder: published writing has been reviewed and read and reviewed again many times. These are opportunities to improve and clarify your writing.
*Your thesis/dissertation will primarily be written by you and then picked apart by your supervisor, committee, and examiners. But after you graduate, you will rarely write alone and be responsible for everything. Find opportunities now to practice "real" publication quality writing. Find people to write with. Start a writing group with other grad students and come up with times to share things you've been working on. Have an "accountability buddy" to whom you report each week or two weeks - write a target number of words, or a section of a paper, or the intro to your thesis. Tell them if you didn't do it. Do the same for them. Work on your proposal if you're not that far - that can help serve as your thesis introduction. Practice summarizing the findings of literature you might cite, and use your own words. Intros and discussions synthesize and summarize existing information, whereas methods and results are didactic. There's nothing to interpret. Understand how these types of writing differ, and understand how to reference different source material.
*Advice from Stephen King that has been recommended to me repeatedly: in his book On Writing, he describes "swoopers" and "bashers". Bashers try to make every sentence perfect before moving on, agonizing over finding the perfect words or turn of phrase. This totally interrupts the flow of your writing, and causes you to stop instead of go. What you should try instead is swooping: when you are in "generate text" mode, just write. Write everything. Do you have a six part method? Summarize it, write all the steps down. Start with bullet points if you have to. Not sure how to frame your introduction? Start with a topic sentence outline. Leave placeholders for references you want to include later. Can't find any references to support your point? Do a lit search and see what is out there. Once you have text you can edit, then go back and agonize over the right word or structure. The point is that you can't edit something that isn't there, and it's a much better use of your time to just sit down and write shit than to self-flagellate and wonder what the LLM would say. Just write. Worry later. You will have plenty of opportunities for editing and feedback later :)
I am still not a great academic writer, but i've had enough practice that I can keep things moving. As much as possible, too, don't take feedback personally. There are some colossal assholes in academia that will try to make you feel bad about yourself. Ignore them completely. There is no need to be a flaming douchebag in review. If you edit someone else's work, think about offering constructive feedback, and give examples of what you would do differently. The author has the right to reject your feedback, but at least give them a good reason of what you would change. Writing is a lifelong skill to improve - hang in there, and keep at it! And if you ever are feeling bad, talk to your fellow students - I guarantee they feel very similarly.
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Comment on Anyone have any ketogenic diet stories? in ~food
cheep_cheep Link ParentI felt bad that I couldn't remember more so I asked her - apparently you can also eat apples, applesauce, rice, bread, cooked carrots, and soluble fiber if you have diarrhea and don't have bananas...I felt bad that I couldn't remember more so I asked her - apparently you can also eat apples, applesauce, rice, bread, cooked carrots, and soluble fiber if you have diarrhea and don't have bananas handy.
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Comment on Anyone have any ketogenic diet stories? in ~food
cheep_cheep Link ParentI'm paraphrasing because I'm an ecologist, but from what I understand, you want a good mix of vegetables, fruits, protein, carbs, healthy fats, and whole grains. She would have specific guidelines...I'm paraphrasing because I'm an ecologist, but from what I understand, you want a good mix of vegetables, fruits, protein, carbs, healthy fats, and whole grains. She would have specific guidelines and handouts, I'm sure, but unfortunately for you I know more about bird food than people food, so I can't really participate meaningfully in a human food debate.
I will say that everything she had told me sounds reasonable and fact-based, and she doesn't espouse any particular approach to eating - she just wants everyone to have the nutrients they need, however that works for the particular human in front of her. She gets frustrated with diet fads because they often contain some kind of critical nutrient imbalance that can cause more harm than good. She's the expert, so perhaps it would be good to talk to someone like her?
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Comment on Anyone have any ketogenic diet stories? in ~food
cheep_cheep LinkI've never tried it. My sister is a dietician and has strong feelings about it, as you might imagine. Her opinion is that keto is for epileptics, and she's seen some really gnarly side effects for...I've never tried it. My sister is a dietician and has strong feelings about it, as you might imagine. Her opinion is that keto is for epileptics, and she's seen some really gnarly side effects for people who aren't. What I've learned from her: eat lots of whole grains, eat a balanced diet, it's ok to eat snacks in moderation. If you can't stop pooping bananas help. She would probably be offended that this is the bulk of what I remember of what she's told me but here we are!
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Comment on What is your dream game? in ~games
cheep_cheep LinkThis is a great question and I've never really thought about it. I want a Harvest Moon-style farming sim, but I want it to be real big - like, No Man's Sky level big. I want to go to different...This is a great question and I've never really thought about it. I want a Harvest Moon-style farming sim, but I want it to be real big - like, No Man's Sky level big. I want to go to different planets (or even star systems!) and harvest unique ingredients. I would like combat to be optional to promote a fully cozy experience (or Persona style, so I can befriend potential monsters/enemies and get the loot through cooperation). I want to collect minerals as well as plant or animal materials. And I want the depth of a Rune Factory style RPG, where I can make a variety of different things that have progression to them - basic food or crops, sure, but also weapons and equipment, pharmacy or healing items, or upgrades for my character. If things get really wild, we could throw in a Recettear or Moonlighter element where you can sell things in a store or some kind of interactive way (although if necessary, I could deal with a trading hub system kiosk like in No Man's Sky).
I'd like to see some potential variety in things to make, too - can I get different fibres to make different kinds of fabrics? What about bringing back different kinds of fauna to harvest different kinds of ingredients? It would be nice to have more crop variety than just radishes etc and fruit trees - what about reeds or or flax or cotton? What about different kinds of dyes? Let's just get really friggin crafty.
And, if I could do all this without the arbitrary "you better be in bed by midnight or else", like No Man's Sky, I would be the happiest little clam.
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Comment on Ella Langley’s ‘Choosin’ Texas’ finally breaks Mariah Carey’s all-time record for weeks at US no. 1, eclipsing ‘All I Want for Christmas Is You’ in ~music
cheep_cheep Link ParentInteresting, thank you for the background! I thought it was an odd trend, culminating in the exceptionally surreal Waylon, but generally I have appreciated the Netherlands' contributions when they...Interesting, thank you for the background! I thought it was an odd trend, culminating in the exceptionally surreal Waylon, but generally I have appreciated the Netherlands' contributions when they participate.
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Comment on Ella Langley’s ‘Choosin’ Texas’ finally breaks Mariah Carey’s all-time record for weeks at US no. 1, eclipsing ‘All I Want for Christmas Is You’ in ~music
cheep_cheep Link ParentThe Netherlands keeps sending twangy country acts to Eurovision, which personally I've always found jarring. I wouldn't be surprised if it's popular there.The Netherlands keeps sending twangy country acts to Eurovision, which personally I've always found jarring. I wouldn't be surprised if it's popular there.
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Comment on Everyday/week seems to fly by as I get older, how to change one's perception? in ~life
cheep_cheep Link ParentI believe this. I am currently pregnant, I feel sick all the time, and each day is excruciating and unending. I don't think time has been this slow since I was ten and on summer vacation, but...I believe this. I am currently pregnant, I feel sick all the time, and each day is excruciating and unending. I don't think time has been this slow since I was ten and on summer vacation, but about 1% as fun.
This is also the recommendation of Dunbar from Catch-22. Wanna live longer? Make each second count by being as miserably bored as possible.
I think your interpretation is very kind, but the logic is confusing to me. If someone makes a blog and shares it, presumably the point is to engage in discussion, or else it would just be a personal diary. If the engagement was too overwhelming, I can't imagine they would make a blog (and then post a link to it to a small community for discussion) in the first place.
I don't have strong feelings at the moment on the issue, but I do agree that if someone wants to put their own content up, either make it a text post or disclose upfront that it's a link to your own work. I personally find it a bit odd when people ask for advice and then make no further comments, but I try to respect that they may be thinking through various options and aren't in the frame of mind to engage. There are better conversations though if OP engages after the initial post.