DefinitelyNotAFae's recent activity

  1. Comment on Good News Everyone! - the coping with everything edition in ~misc

    DefinitelyNotAFae
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    Sesame Street: Making Crayons This may be the reason I loved How It's Made. There is just something nostalgic and peaceful about these little crayons.

    Sesame Street: Making Crayons

    This may be the reason I loved How It's Made. There is just something nostalgic and peaceful about these little crayons.

    2 votes

  2. Good News Everyone! - the coping with everything edition

    ~misc Ask (recommendations)
    In this edition of the Good News thread, I'd love it if folks shared not just a positive news story, but perhaps a video, article, story, something that can function as a happy moment, a chill...

    In this edition of the Good News thread, I'd love it if folks shared not just a positive news story, but perhaps a video, article, story, something that can function as a happy moment, a chill vibe, a memory that makes you smile. We're all just trying to deal with the world, so if you cannot find joy in current events, consider sharing something else joyful.

    For this thread, even if something happy also reveals the sadness at the heart of the world, we're going to focus on the joy here. (Posting in misc due to the extended ask this time)

    5 votes

  3. Comment on Hooters | Bankrupt in ~food

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link Parent
    I didn't think you meant it personally, just that I wanted to provide the perspective of someone who's like "why would you want to do that?" because it's so unappealing to me, without the...

    I didn't think you meant it personally, just that I wanted to provide the perspective of someone who's like "why would you want to do that?" because it's so unappealing to me, without the sex-negativity angle.

    1 vote

  4. Comment on Hooters | Bankrupt in ~food

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link Parent
    Sure lots of restaurants aren't to my preference, and I was trying to be quite clear that I was talking about my preference. But I was responding mostly to the rest of your comment about it being...

    Sure lots of restaurants aren't to my preference, and I was trying to be quite clear that I was talking about my preference. But I was responding mostly to the rest of your comment about it being disingenuous and obvious or about shame in part because the Hooters aesthetic isn't one I find particularly attractive (I'm not saying the people aren't), and in part because even the concept of "you get to socialize with hot people who are being paid to socialize with you" isn't something I'm that interested in. I don't "get" it in that sense. I don't feel "shackled" by society in that way as you described in another comment.

    I get that other people obviously do enjoy it. But similarly I don't "get" why people care about the gender or genitals of their sexual partners. I know other people do, and I can intellectualize it, but it doesn't make any sense to me.

    I hope all that makes sense.

  5. Comment on US households using Ozempic spend less on groceries in ~health

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link Parent
    Yeah look if folks want to take it, they do what's best for them. I just don't want people to feel pressured into taking medication because society makes them feel like shit all the time. I had an...

    Yeah look if folks want to take it, they do what's best for them. I just don't want people to feel pressured into taking medication because society makes them feel like shit all the time. I had an experience on an airplane last week that reminded me that despite fitting in the seat and seatbelt fine and having broad shoulders (so I kept my arms crossed most of the flight ) my body shape doesn't let me use the tray table at all. It sucks. And I see so little care for the impact of that sort of thing. among the "well actually it's better for you to lose weight no matter what" crowd.

    My partner takes ozempic and I don't begrudge him doing it at all, and it's managing his diabetes magnificently. Losing weight will help him manage his paraplegia better and technically make my life easier, but I don't want him to feel he has to do any of that. But his heart and blood work are otherwise fine, and losing weight won't fix his primary disability which is the one thing he'd really want.

    I am not personally convinced that it is a long term healthy option to simply suppress someone's appetite, but I don't have to be. I just want folks to see this larger picture and not make blanket statements about "this or a heart attack" basically.

    3 votes

  6. Comment on US households using Ozempic spend less on groceries in ~health

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link Parent
    I do not clock/retain most folks usernames so it wasn't personal for whatever that is worth. It was a response to that lack of nuance. I appreciate your preference, my response is based on...

    I do not clock/retain most folks usernames so it wasn't personal for whatever that is worth. It was a response to that lack of nuance. I appreciate your preference, my response is based on multiple conversations on Tildes going in precisely that direction regardless of how I ask. I'll make the attempt to notice you specifically in the future

    1 vote

  7. Comment on US households using Ozempic spend less on groceries in ~health

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link Parent
    That's not my experience with Adderall. I'm just not hungry.

    That's not my experience with Adderall. I'm just not hungry.

    2 votes

  8. Comment on US households using Ozempic spend less on groceries in ~health

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link Parent
    I'm not sure anyone has actually studied a lot of the "whys" but the side effects were cited in one study near the beginning and I haven't seen much since. Usually those folks are just mentioned...

    I'm not sure anyone has actually studied a lot of the "whys" but the side effects were cited in one study near the beginning and I haven't seen much since. Usually those folks are just mentioned as drop outs and moved on from.

    My appetite being suppressed is absolutely the worst part of my Adderall and I pay for it daily when I end up with a headache and stomach ache and still don't want to eat, as I usually end up skipping lunch and not drinking enough water. I'm sure it works for folks, but it would be misery for me.

    1 vote

  9. Comment on Hooters | Bankrupt in ~food

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link Parent
    I have not been assuming ill of you, and I don't think you've needed the benefit of the doubt at any point in this nor am I assuming ill will. I thought that you misread Choco as being sarcastic...

    I have not been assuming ill of you, and I don't think you've needed the benefit of the doubt at any point in this nor am I assuming ill will. I thought that you misread Choco as being sarcastic with the use of "super" since you italicized it in response and followed it up with a "or so we simply" which is a contradicting phrase.

    Glad to hear I was mistaken and my apologies for the misunderstanding on my part.

    2 votes

  10. Comment on US households using Ozempic spend less on groceries in ~health

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link Parent
    No, you didn't target me, though I'm in the category of people you are talking about. I was being preemptive because I've had these conversations before. I'm not interested in all of the nuance...

    No, you didn't target me, though I'm in the category of people you are talking about. I was being preemptive because I've had these conversations before.

    I'm not interested in all of the nuance being flattened into taciturn statements. And it does sound incredibly dismissive to all of the concerns people have, financial, psychological and medical, to taking the drugs to flatten it to "well better than a heart attack by 40."

    I could reply with "better a heart attack by 40 than suicide by 35.". Those are not the only two options.

    2 votes

  11. Comment on Hooters | Bankrupt in ~food

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link Parent
    I don't think chocobean was being sarcastic there and I feel like you're being kind of aggressive comparing "male gaze" to "legitimate rape" or "what was she wearing" as if those are somehow the...

    I don't think chocobean was being sarcastic there and I feel like you're being kind of aggressive comparing "male gaze" to "legitimate rape" or "what was she wearing" as if those are somehow the same sort of thing in response to chocobean saying this was their own hangup, not the restaurant itself.

    I'm really genuinely glad your experience was good and you had a positive environment. That's the ideal and I'm really happy for you. But it feels like all your frustrations in this conversation came out at Choco, who was specifically saying that those mental comparisons were internal hangups based on their past not judgements of people working there.

    1 vote

  12. Comment on US households using Ozempic spend less on groceries in ~health

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link Parent
    Yes, and as we all know the two options are appetite suppressants for life or death at 40. I'm not interested in hyperbole or hearing how I'm five seconds from keeling over today, thanks.

    Yes, and as we all know the two options are appetite suppressants for life or death at 40.

    I'm not interested in hyperbole or hearing how I'm five seconds from keeling over today, thanks.

    3 votes

  13. Comment on US households using Ozempic spend less on groceries in ~health

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link Parent
    Right, I was looking at Ozempic, not Wegovy or Rybelsus. Ozempic is still more expensive.

    Right, I was looking at Ozempic, not Wegovy or Rybelsus. Ozempic is still more expensive.

  14. Comment on US households using Ozempic spend less on groceries in ~health

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    (edited )
    Link Parent
    I'd argue that isn't the "at worst" - you can fuck up your hunger cues and have some psychological side effects especially if you have a history of disordered eating. But even $100 a month is out...

    I'd argue that isn't the "at worst" - you can fuck up your hunger cues and have some psychological side effects especially if you have a history of disordered eating.

    But even $100 a month is out of reach for many people and if your insurance goes from covering it to not due to your A1C or weight going below a threshold suddenly you're cut off without a step down.

    I'm not coming from a "it's cheating" perspective, and most critics of IWL and the diet industry as a whole aren't. It's far more about pretty much all weight loss products lying about or hiding side effects, how many people keep the weight loss off long term, and how many people continue the intervention after 2+ years. And the bonus fat phobia inherent in the system. No one cares if you're healthy, they care if you're fat. As long as you're thin, you can be unhealthy as hell, and if you lose weight in an unhealthy way (like anorexia) you're still praised for it.

    Those aren't criticisms of the people using the drugs, they're criticisms of the industry and society. I can be opposed to IWL and the industry and also not judge people for their actions with their own body. I will judge how every decade or two we get a magic diet pill with big claims (it fixes gambling addiction AND being fat) and little acknowledgement of, for example, how folks on ozempic might need to force themselves to eat, not just take the lack of appetite as a sign that they're good to starve their bodies or that this other pill will give you massive diarrhea or that this other one is literally amphetamines.

    I don't want it to be more prevalent. I don't think it's a good goal. But again not because it's cheating, because I lived through the 90s and the era when the slightest stomach pooch is a sign you're a disgusting fat. I want to exist in my body without other people who aren't my dietician or my doctor insisting on telling me how they know what's best for me including ignoring when I ask or tell them not to. And the ozempic era has only been making that worse, not better.

    Edited for typos and clarifying parenthetical

    3 votes

  15. Comment on US households using Ozempic spend less on groceries in ~health

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link Parent
    It has a lot to do with whether you can tolerate the side effects in the first place and continue to do so, and afford the medication long term. Many of the initial studies sort of ignore the...

    It has a lot to do with whether you can tolerate the side effects in the first place and continue to do so, and afford the medication long term. Many of the initial studies sort of ignore the percentage of people that quit and why. This one was just an abstract so idk what it considers.

    Personally being on a med that fucks up my appetite half the time is miserable. I wouldn't go on a long acting med for weight loss anyway, but I am not surprised people quit.

    4 votes

  16. Comment on US households using Ozempic spend less on groceries in ~health

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    (edited )
    Link Parent
    Without insurance think 10x that for the name brand. (Other brands, other formulations will be different. But ozempic without insurance is still expensive. This does not consider coupons. )

    Without insurance think 10x that for the name brand.

    (Other brands, other formulations will be different. But ozempic without insurance is still expensive. This does not consider coupons. )

    2 votes

  17. Comment on "Have your best baby" in ~health

    DefinitelyNotAFae
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    I didn't say they'd necessarily be different, I said I wonder how they react. Someone who has spend a lot of money trying to avoid a disabled child or even a "less than ideal" child may be...

    but I don’t see why they’d be different on average from other parents?

    I didn't say they'd necessarily be different, I said I wonder how they react. Someone who has spend a lot of money trying to avoid a disabled child or even a "less than ideal" child may be disappointed by having a child they consider less than ideal.

    5 votes

  18. Comment on "Have your best baby" in ~health

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link Parent
    I don't have the energy for a eugenics conversation this morning but I always wonder how those parents react to their kid being born with Cerebral Palsy or with anything with high support needs....

    I don't have the energy for a eugenics conversation this morning but I always wonder how those parents react to their kid being born with Cerebral Palsy or with anything with high support needs. Or being injured in childhood.

    Bleh

    2 votes

  19. Comment on Golden Globes 2026: ‘One Battle After Another’ wins Comedy, ‘Hamnet’ wins Drama in ~movies

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link Parent
    It was really brilliantly done - they pass the cigarette (which has a plot reason since Smoke can't roll his own due to the shakes) to demonstrate the technology and then they split up a bit to...

    It was really brilliantly done - they pass the cigarette (which has a plot reason since Smoke can't roll his own due to the shakes) to demonstrate the technology and then they split up a bit to let you get to know them individually. But by the latter half of the movie you (general) don't need their outfits to key you in to who they are (and which mob they worked for and betrayed).
    That movie is so good.

    2 votes

  20. Comment on Golden Globes 2026: ‘One Battle After Another’ wins Comedy, ‘Hamnet’ wins Drama in ~movies

    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link Parent
    I think Sinners and Michael B Jordan are both getting robbed. Jordan played 3* distinct characters in that movie and it was absolutely clear who he was at any given time. (Technically two, sure...

    I think Sinners and Michael B Jordan are both getting robbed. Jordan played 3* distinct characters in that movie and it was absolutely clear who he was at any given time.

    (Technically two, sure but I maintain one changes dramatically enough he is functionally entirely different. )

    8 votes