I'm convinced that, rather than a time machine, they have developed the world's most advanced quantum computer. It will predict all possible futures, which they use to preview future news...
I'm convinced that, rather than a time machine, they have developed the world's most advanced quantum computer. It will predict all possible futures, which they use to preview future news headlines. The Onion staff just cherry picks the ones they like and mess with the wording a bit. Occasionally, they accidently pick one that was low probability, but ends up actually coming true.
Saw the actual news earlier. Then, I saw the Tildes post, and "realized" it had been satire. Then, actually looked at the Tildes post, and realized it had been real news, desperately wishing it...
Saw the actual news earlier.
Then, I saw the Tildes post, and "realized" it had been satire.
Then, actually looked at the Tildes post, and realized it had been real news, desperately wishing it was satire.
For anyone that doesn't get the joke...
This truly is the darkest timeline
The Onion article is a decade old and almost to the day this happened: https://apnews.com/article/bagram-afghanistan-airfield-us-troops-f3614828364f567593251aaaa167e623
The Onion seemingly predicts the future way more often than I'm comfortable with.
Yeah, this might beat my old favorite, After Obama Victory, Shrieking White-Hot Sphere Of Pure Rage Early GOP Front-Runner For 2016
As always, nothing will ever beat the old classic: Our Long National Nightmare Of Peace And Prosperity Is Finally Over
I'm convinced that, rather than a time machine, they have developed the world's most advanced quantum computer. It will predict all possible futures, which they use to preview future news headlines. The Onion staff just cherry picks the ones they like and mess with the wording a bit. Occasionally, they accidently pick one that was low probability, but ends up actually coming true.
Saw the actual news earlier.
Then, I saw the Tildes post, and "realized" it had been satire.
Then, actually looked at the Tildes post, and realized it had been real news, desperately wishing it was satire.