Charlie xcx is a British pop star that got pretty famous in the summer of 2024 with her album brat, which initiated a short-lived trend of brat summer, which even some larger newspapers wrote...
One of the main realities of being a pop star is that at a certain level, it’s really fucking fun. You get to go to great parties in a black SUV and you can smoke cigarettes in the car and scream out of the sunroof and all that cliche shit. At these parties you sometimes get to meet interesting people and those interesting people often actually want to meet you. You get to wear fabulous clothes and shoes and jewelry that sometimes comes with its own security guard who trails you around the party making sure you don’t lose the extortionate earrings sitting on your lobes or let some random person you’ve just met in the bathroom try on the necklace around your neck that is equivalent to the heart of the ocean.
You get to enter restaurants through the back entrance and give a half smile to the head chef (who probably hates you) and the waiters (who probably hate you too) as they sweat away doing an actual real service industry job while you strut through the kitchen with your 4 best friends who are tagging along for the ride. You get to feel special, but you also have to at points feel embarrassed by how stupid the whole thing is.
You get to travel the world and see all kinds of different places and you never even have to worry about booking a single element of the travel yourself because you have an amazing tour manager to do that for you. You get to call in sick whenever you want and you never have to worry about bailing on work last minute because you know for certain that there’s another pop star out there who’s actually way more unreliable and flakey than you. Thank God.
You will also end up spending a lot of time inhabiting strange and soulless liminal spaces. Whether its the holding area of the event you’re about to enter, the airport lounge, the visa office, the claustrophobic tour bus, the greenroom with no windows, the underneath of a stage or the set build of a photoshoot or music video you’re on, you are often caught in the in-between. You’re in transit, you’re going somewhere but the journey itself takes up the majority of the experience.
Another thing about being a pop star is that you cannot avoid the fact that some people are simply determined to prove that you are stupid.
think subconsciously people still believe there is only room for women to be a certain type of way and once they claim to be one way they better not DARE grow or change or morph into something else. Also people obviously want the clicks and an opposite stance is more likely to get that.
Sometimes being a pop star can be really embarrassing, especially when you’re around old friends of family members who have known you since before you could talk.
Charlie xcx is a British pop star that got pretty famous in the summer of 2024 with her album brat, which initiated a short-lived trend of brat summer, which even some larger newspapers wrote about.
Despite substack nowadays being associated with their ultra-free-speech attitude which permitted nazis to use the platform, which is why I avoid going on the site, I made an exception here, as I found her essay quite an interesting read, and I hope you do too!
Is it schadenfraude to feel disgusted and yet desire this lifestyle? We really only see the veneer of most of these artists - what the media shows. What's really going on underneath? One artist...
Is it schadenfraude to feel disgusted and yet desire this lifestyle?
We really only see the veneer of most of these artists - what the media shows. What's really going on underneath?
One artist that always comes to mind is Ariana Grande. She began the same as Jeanette McCurdy and others on Nickelodeon, and 100% was subjected to the same depredations as the rest of the child stars, yet as far as I know hasn't come out and said anything about it. Considering the music they've put out, it seems almost like they revel in it and acknowledge "yes I got here by doing this... And I'll continue." I wonder about her.
I can't really articulate why fame in general disgusts me. I don't have much more to add right now about it, I just vehemently dislike the automatic respect famous people are given.
Edit: ok I admit I didn't read through the whole article before posting. I went back, read it, and I'm impressed at the self reflection and introspection of the author. It even touches on some of what I wrote above - which I'm leaving for posterity - and addresses that. A concept of what a pop star is to society, what they ought to be, and the comparison to their old life.
This is a strongly feminist article in that it highlights specifically the feminine foibles - sex symbol vs whore, vapid vs intelligent, etc. It plays right into my original thought, recoiling away from automatic respect of fame. Do I do the same characterization? Denigrating those who I feel are unworthy of their fortune despite positive qualities?
I know I have in the past, I'm sure I am now, and I certainly will in the future. I hope I continue to find writers like this author who challenge my beliefs and make me reconsider my views.
I don't know whether it's schadenfraude, but I think most people are kind of disgusted by the excesses of fame, yet still desire some of it. I think desiring that lifestyle, for most people, is...
I don't know whether it's schadenfraude, but I think most people are kind of disgusted by the excesses of fame, yet still desire some of it.
I think desiring that lifestyle, for most people, is due to ignorance of what that kind of lifestyle entails though. There are some people for whom being a famous entertainer would absolutely be the thing that would make them happiness, but I doubt that's the case for most people.
For me the money is the only really attractive thing. I like being anonymous, being able to go to the store to get milk without 5 people yelling at me or asking for a picture. I like being able to make my own decisions instead of being told by a publicist or a record label handler that I should act a certain way. I don't think that crazy parties with celebrities sounds fun, and personally there aren't any celebrities I'd ever want to meet anyway.
I think when you take full stock of that life, the pros don't outweigh the cons for most people's personalities.
I really appreciated this post. Quality writing evokes emotion, and the varied responses already written here show that Charli is an excellent writer. I felt some sense of disdain reading this;...
I really appreciated this post. Quality writing evokes emotion, and the varied responses already written here show that Charli is an excellent writer.
I felt some sense of disdain reading this; despite the grounded and self-reflective nature of the piece, I’d argue Charli still seems out of touch. There’s this hard-to-describe disconnect between the description of the lifestyle and what the implications of that lifestyle actually are compared to how other people live, and it left me with a sense of vapidness despite the critical self-reflection. To be frank, it was a really odd sensation to leave with. I’ll try to pick out a couple of quotes that did this for me.
You get to enter restaurants through the back entrance and give a half smile to the head chef (who probably hates you) and the waiters (who probably hate you too) as they sweat away doing an actual real service industry job while you strut through the kitchen with your 4 best friends who are tagging along for the ride. You get to feel special, but you also have to at points feel embarrassed by how stupid the whole thing is.
Charli frames her relationships with the world via people’s perceptions of her. She relies on assumptions and evidence of how people perceive to actually inform her conception of the world; at least that’s how the piece reads. Is she special? Is the whole situation stupid?
When he finally pressed send his message said that he thought I had not changed from the person he knew when we were younger and that he didn’t think I would in the future but also that I definitely do have ‘yes people’ around me that blow smoke up my ass. I said I could see the truth in that but luckily he went on to say that generally speaking I’m too British and self deprecating to actually believe any of the wild compliments the ‘yes people’ might pay me so I was probably safe.
Again, Charli herself does not actually reflect on if she has changed, but relies on some external perception to validate this. She does not actually grapple with the question from her own view, and therefore refuses to actually reveal herself to the reader. The title “The realities of being a pop star” offers some sense of transparency, but I did not learn anything new.
My final thought on being a pop star is that there is a level of expectation for you to be entirely truthful all the time. Over recent years some people seem to have developed a connection between fame and moral responsibility that I’ve never really understood.
I’m not sure how to feel about the relationship between fame and moral responsibility, but to claim you have “never really understood” it is a strong choice of words. I think society’s perception of a famous person lends them inherent power and influence, and then assigning responsibility to the famous person is obvious. I think it’s fair to criticize this relationship, to question it, or to subvert it. Not to understand it reinforces that she never tries to grapple with what being a “pop star” means to her or to the world, except for the lifestyle benefits and the occasional interactions with the average person that she has. Everything else is locked in a bubble of ‘this is the way I am perceived’.
I believe that’s where my disdain comes from; I feel that this perspective is vain even if it tries not to be. Yet, as I sat for a few moments to reflect on my emotions after reading, my disdain turned into sadness.
How can one expect such a famous person to actually grapple with the world outside of their own reflection in it? I try to humble myself and ground my perspective by spending time with people who do not really care about me. Interactions with strangers where my history, job, education, etc. don’t actually matter help me distinguish between what I think is important and what is actually important.
Pop stars simply cannot ever experience that. Their fame means that they are constantly surrounded by people who care who they are. If they ever try to interact with the general public, they are immediately reminded about who they are and how the world perceives them, usually with some profound negative feedback. Of course they feel like these opulent lifestyles are normal, as they are the only place where they can find some sense of normalcy.
I hope this is insightful; it was helpful for me to write. I still think this is an excelllent piece of writing. It made me think about things quite a bit and informed my perspective of the world.
I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt here, but I do think she accepts that. The way that she's writing this entire thing makes it seem like from her POV it is stupid, but the stupidity gets...
Is the whole situation stupid?
I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt here, but I do think she accepts that. The way that she's writing this entire thing makes it seem like from her POV it is stupid, but the stupidity gets covered over in the really fun stuff she describes, the wearing of stupidly expensive earrings that come with their own bodyguard, the driving through LA streets at night and scream and sing through an open car roof.
In a way, all these things are vapid experiences, but vapid doesn't mean that it's not fun. It just means that it's an experience without any real meaning. But not everything has to be that way. Life is about contrasts; you cannot and should not sit around all day, imitating The Thinker and ponder on the gravity of life. Sometimes, you just need to get drunk with friends and shoot the shit. Those are good, vapid memories.
Maybe I'm giving charli too much benefit of the doubt here, but I didn't read the "never really understood" that literally here. I think she means exactly what you write. Or maybe you're right, and I'm wrong, and she shields herself from grappling with the situation truly by not thinking about it. Many people live their life that way. In that case, I understand your disdain.
I totally understand what you are saying here. Yeah, this could be an artistic piece and intentionally focuses on evoking what my response was. There will always be a weird boundary between the...
I totally understand what you are saying here.
Maybe I'm giving charli too much benefit of the doubt here, but I didn't read the "never really understood" that literally here. I think she means exactly what you write.
Yeah, this could be an artistic piece and intentionally focuses on evoking what my response was. There will always be a weird boundary between the privileged vapid memories and the intense reality of being a famous person that the writing does an excellent job of capturing.
I didn’t talk about the possibility of intentionality much originally because my post was long enough. But for an artist like charli I can definitely see it. I occasionally write like this, portraying my perspective to evoke a specific reaction in the reader. I think my response still stands, just as a response to “charli the author-character” instead of “charli the author-person”.
Regardless, the writing does a great job of capturing the dissonance between an artist’s own experience and their interaction with the wider world because of their fame. Thank you for posting it!
I like charli. She seems legit and appears fairly down to earth and someone who I would enjoy having a casual chat at a BBQ with. Assuming this piece was really more her voice and not a publicist...
I like charli. She seems legit and appears fairly down to earth and someone who I would enjoy having a casual chat at a BBQ with. Assuming this piece was really more her voice and not a publicist or whoever is in charge of this kinda stuff talking I found it very interesting. I might subscribe to her stack.*
*is that the way people refer to subscribing to substack?
I prefer “blog.” Although, an issue I have with Substack is that it’s oriented towards email subscriptions. I started a blog there, but haven’t posted in years because I’m hesitant to post quick...
I prefer “blog.” Although, an issue I have with Substack is that it’s oriented towards email subscriptions. I started a blog there, but haven’t posted in years because I’m hesitant to post quick notes that cause a bunch of strangers to get email. As a result, I post nothing at all.
So, maybe newsletter fits better for what Substack is doing. I need to find another way.
Thanks for posting this. I have been holding off on starting a substack because of some of the reasons discussed by the author of that article. I have seen some of the alternatives that were...
Thanks for posting this. I have been holding off on starting a substack because of some of the reasons discussed by the author of that article. I have seen some of the alternatives that were linked in the post so I will most likely give them another look. Saying that I am actually considering upgrading my bearblog because I do like that platform and it seems like a nice space.
Somehow I knew exactly which Lou Reed interview that was going to be before I clicked. What a classic. And what a fun way to make a point about fantasy vs. reality in our relationship with...
Somehow I knew exactly which Lou Reed interview that was going to be before I clicked. What a classic. And what a fun way to make a point about fantasy vs. reality in our relationship with popstars and fame.
It's hard for me not to engage some particularly critical part of my brain reading this. Yet, I enjoyed this article, and the more medium to long form written content that's at least trying to engage with nuance that's put out the better. So maybe I'll leave some of that criticism on the floor and just leave it at having enjoyed the piece and perspective.
Charlie xcx is a British pop star that got pretty famous in the summer of 2024 with her album brat, which initiated a short-lived trend of brat summer, which even some larger newspapers wrote about.
Despite substack nowadays being associated with their ultra-free-speech attitude which permitted nazis to use the platform, which is why I avoid going on the site, I made an exception here, as I found her essay quite an interesting read, and I hope you do too!
Is it schadenfraude to feel disgusted and yet desire this lifestyle?
We really only see the veneer of most of these artists - what the media shows. What's really going on underneath?
One artist that always comes to mind is Ariana Grande. She began the same as Jeanette McCurdy and others on Nickelodeon, and 100% was subjected to the same depredations as the rest of the child stars, yet as far as I know hasn't come out and said anything about it. Considering the music they've put out, it seems almost like they revel in it and acknowledge "yes I got here by doing this... And I'll continue." I wonder about her.
I can't really articulate why fame in general disgusts me. I don't have much more to add right now about it, I just vehemently dislike the automatic respect famous people are given.
Edit: ok I admit I didn't read through the whole article before posting. I went back, read it, and I'm impressed at the self reflection and introspection of the author. It even touches on some of what I wrote above - which I'm leaving for posterity - and addresses that. A concept of what a pop star is to society, what they ought to be, and the comparison to their old life.
This is a strongly feminist article in that it highlights specifically the feminine foibles - sex symbol vs whore, vapid vs intelligent, etc. It plays right into my original thought, recoiling away from automatic respect of fame. Do I do the same characterization? Denigrating those who I feel are unworthy of their fortune despite positive qualities?
I know I have in the past, I'm sure I am now, and I certainly will in the future. I hope I continue to find writers like this author who challenge my beliefs and make me reconsider my views.
I don't know whether it's schadenfraude, but I think most people are kind of disgusted by the excesses of fame, yet still desire some of it.
I think desiring that lifestyle, for most people, is due to ignorance of what that kind of lifestyle entails though. There are some people for whom being a famous entertainer would absolutely be the thing that would make them happiness, but I doubt that's the case for most people.
For me the money is the only really attractive thing. I like being anonymous, being able to go to the store to get milk without 5 people yelling at me or asking for a picture. I like being able to make my own decisions instead of being told by a publicist or a record label handler that I should act a certain way. I don't think that crazy parties with celebrities sounds fun, and personally there aren't any celebrities I'd ever want to meet anyway.
I think when you take full stock of that life, the pros don't outweigh the cons for most people's personalities.
I really appreciated this post. Quality writing evokes emotion, and the varied responses already written here show that Charli is an excellent writer.
I felt some sense of disdain reading this; despite the grounded and self-reflective nature of the piece, I’d argue Charli still seems out of touch. There’s this hard-to-describe disconnect between the description of the lifestyle and what the implications of that lifestyle actually are compared to how other people live, and it left me with a sense of vapidness despite the critical self-reflection. To be frank, it was a really odd sensation to leave with. I’ll try to pick out a couple of quotes that did this for me.
Charli frames her relationships with the world via people’s perceptions of her. She relies on assumptions and evidence of how people perceive to actually inform her conception of the world; at least that’s how the piece reads. Is she special? Is the whole situation stupid?
Again, Charli herself does not actually reflect on if she has changed, but relies on some external perception to validate this. She does not actually grapple with the question from her own view, and therefore refuses to actually reveal herself to the reader. The title “The realities of being a pop star” offers some sense of transparency, but I did not learn anything new.
I’m not sure how to feel about the relationship between fame and moral responsibility, but to claim you have “never really understood” it is a strong choice of words. I think society’s perception of a famous person lends them inherent power and influence, and then assigning responsibility to the famous person is obvious. I think it’s fair to criticize this relationship, to question it, or to subvert it. Not to understand it reinforces that she never tries to grapple with what being a “pop star” means to her or to the world, except for the lifestyle benefits and the occasional interactions with the average person that she has. Everything else is locked in a bubble of ‘this is the way I am perceived’.
I believe that’s where my disdain comes from; I feel that this perspective is vain even if it tries not to be. Yet, as I sat for a few moments to reflect on my emotions after reading, my disdain turned into sadness.
How can one expect such a famous person to actually grapple with the world outside of their own reflection in it? I try to humble myself and ground my perspective by spending time with people who do not really care about me. Interactions with strangers where my history, job, education, etc. don’t actually matter help me distinguish between what I think is important and what is actually important.
Pop stars simply cannot ever experience that. Their fame means that they are constantly surrounded by people who care who they are. If they ever try to interact with the general public, they are immediately reminded about who they are and how the world perceives them, usually with some profound negative feedback. Of course they feel like these opulent lifestyles are normal, as they are the only place where they can find some sense of normalcy.
I hope this is insightful; it was helpful for me to write. I still think this is an excelllent piece of writing. It made me think about things quite a bit and informed my perspective of the world.
I'm giving her the benefit of the doubt here, but I do think she accepts that. The way that she's writing this entire thing makes it seem like from her POV it is stupid, but the stupidity gets covered over in the really fun stuff she describes, the wearing of stupidly expensive earrings that come with their own bodyguard, the driving through LA streets at night and scream and sing through an open car roof.
In a way, all these things are vapid experiences, but vapid doesn't mean that it's not fun. It just means that it's an experience without any real meaning. But not everything has to be that way. Life is about contrasts; you cannot and should not sit around all day, imitating The Thinker and ponder on the gravity of life. Sometimes, you just need to get drunk with friends and shoot the shit. Those are good, vapid memories.
Maybe I'm giving charli too much benefit of the doubt here, but I didn't read the "never really understood" that literally here. I think she means exactly what you write. Or maybe you're right, and I'm wrong, and she shields herself from grappling with the situation truly by not thinking about it. Many people live their life that way. In that case, I understand your disdain.
Thank you for your post, it was a joy to read.
I totally understand what you are saying here.
Yeah, this could be an artistic piece and intentionally focuses on evoking what my response was. There will always be a weird boundary between the privileged vapid memories and the intense reality of being a famous person that the writing does an excellent job of capturing.
I didn’t talk about the possibility of intentionality much originally because my post was long enough. But for an artist like charli I can definitely see it. I occasionally write like this, portraying my perspective to evoke a specific reaction in the reader. I think my response still stands, just as a response to “charli the author-character” instead of “charli the author-person”.
Regardless, the writing does a great job of capturing the dissonance between an artist’s own experience and their interaction with the wider world because of their fame. Thank you for posting it!
And thank you for giving it so much thought!
I like charli. She seems legit and appears fairly down to earth and someone who I would enjoy having a casual chat at a BBQ with. Assuming this piece was really more her voice and not a publicist or whoever is in charge of this kinda stuff talking I found it very interesting. I might subscribe to her stack.*
*is that the way people refer to subscribing to substack?
I must use this opportunity to spread the just call it a newsletter message to the world
I prefer “blog.” Although, an issue I have with Substack is that it’s oriented towards email subscriptions. I started a blog there, but haven’t posted in years because I’m hesitant to post quick notes that cause a bunch of strangers to get email. As a result, I post nothing at all.
So, maybe newsletter fits better for what Substack is doing. I need to find another way.
Thanks for posting this. I have been holding off on starting a substack because of some of the reasons discussed by the author of that article. I have seen some of the alternatives that were linked in the post so I will most likely give them another look. Saying that I am actually considering upgrading my bearblog because I do like that platform and it seems like a nice space.
Somehow I knew exactly which Lou Reed interview that was going to be before I clicked. What a classic. And what a fun way to make a point about fantasy vs. reality in our relationship with popstars and fame.
It's hard for me not to engage some particularly critical part of my brain reading this. Yet, I enjoyed this article, and the more medium to long form written content that's at least trying to engage with nuance that's put out the better. So maybe I'll leave some of that criticism on the floor and just leave it at having enjoyed the piece and perspective.