I was brusque with my family today
Most of my family members (notably everyone in the older generation) are variously xenophobic (very), transphobic (plenty) and racist (enough). They're openly right wing populist party voters. In family gatherings, or even in online messaging, I normally ignore them or try to divert the conversation away from their stupid political takes - even the ones who know I am pansexual are likely to say some nasty shit, showing (I believe) that they don't have a drop of respect for me or my gay brother. There is nothing I can ever convince them of, political or not, because (I believe) they will always treat my arguments with disdain, regardless of any reason or evidence. I don't think much better of their politics myself, since I find most of their constant complaining about entire classes of people they've never even interacted with incredibly tiresome, not to mention wholly inconsistent with their supposed christian values (I know, this situation sounds very american, even though I am not.)
I personally believe there is some value in some, but not all, arguments that are for restricting or reorganizing immigration at this time, mainly due to problems stemming from years of lazy policymaking, and in some right wing fiscal policy (we have some extremely expensive and inefficient government programmes right now - NOT health or education - and misguided protectionism of certain huge and mismanaged private companies), so we can usually meet on that common ground.
Today at a gathering an aunt decided out of the blue to loudly proclaim how happy she was that Donald Trump was elected in the US. Other relatives quickly agreed, after which they started a conversation about how a Trump presidency will be good for the economy. At this point I will just politely say I didn't understand what they were talking about (my thoughts weren't as kind at the time); we are not americans, and I have the notion that Trump is an isolationist who admires dictators and despises the EU and doesn't value us as allies; I am led to believe he wants to do things with regard to defense, tariffs, etc. that are unambiguously bad for us and will directly translate into a harder life and more danger for Europeans over the next few years.
A younger relative then said he was happy that we finally had "an insane dictator" on "our side". According to him, none of the crazy authoritarians in the world respected a man like Biden, but they were wary of Trump, since Trump is unpredictable. I remember hearing this argument eight years ago, but I'm not so sure of this. Historically, as I said, Trump seems to me to fawn over strongmen and demagogues leading other nations, while he hasn't exactly conveyed that he is "on our side". As far as I know, he's been suspiciously an enabler of Vladimir Putin, for instance.
So at this point I explained to my family that we weren't there to discuss politics and the politics conversation was to end immediately or I was going to start insulting people.
I'd like you all to tell me if I'm in the wrong here. Am I out of touch? Can you explain my family's perspective to me in a way that makes them sound less insane? This isn't some kind of bait. Just because I don't like Donald Trump (and neither do the majority of people in this community, AFAIK), I pride myself in being a fairly rational person. I can be convinced of things, as long as there's rationally constructed argument underpinning them. Maybe there's some value to their position?
Nothing you've said sounds wrong to me. I can at least see why Trump is appealing to a low-information American voter. I have no idea how "America First" can sound good to anyone who doesn't live in America.
Yeah... I agree. I'm really hoping someone will have an informative, sensible take on why these relatives of mine would be so keen on Trump. Or at least more sensible than "I like that he's crazy." I'm not that involved with american politics so there's a lot that I don't know; I was hoping Trump or his staff might actually have some kind of promise or macroeconomical effect that is beneficial for my otherwise craziness-starved family.
You’ve had amazing restraint with people who are unwilling to do the same for you. I have no real insight for you. People will always find a way to be right, ever moving the goalpost. At this point, goalpost has been moved so many times that I can no longer see the starting point. Watching my country hurtle to this fiery end breaks my heart. I see what fear has wrought and am sorry your family has decided to idolize it. Be safe.
You're not in the wrong at all. I'd say you've been far too kind for too long about this, honestly.
Conservatives, and Trump supporters especially, are driven pretty much entirely by emotion and impulse, at least in regards to their sociopolitical beliefs. I think the authoritarian personality is coming into play here - for people with that mindset, anyone who is "disloyal" or questions their leader is subject to an intense emotional reaction. My family is pretty much entirely the same way, and even though at times they can be lead to think some things through logically, it doesn't really matter in the grand scheme of things - they didn't come to their viewpoints from reasoning or logical methods, and they therefore won't separate from their viewpoints via any reasoning or logical method.
You cannot reason someone out of a position that they did not reason themselves into. You have remarkable restraint and I'm frankly surprised at your willingness to even be in the same room as those people. Family or not.
If my family were that toxic, I would not socialize with them and I would tell them very bluntly why. I do not tolerate bigotry.