41 votes

How to Design for the Modern Web (Satire)

35 comments

  1. [13]
    Deimos
    Link
    This may be satire, but the reddit mobile web site isn't far off from this any more: https://i.imgur.com/bANRbSR.png They even added a huge banner to the desktop site lately to try to get you to...

    This may be satire, but the reddit mobile web site isn't far off from this any more: https://i.imgur.com/bANRbSR.png

    They even added a huge banner to the desktop site lately to try to get you to use the app: https://i.imgur.com/Lthtssc.png

    27 votes
    1. [4]
      dubteedub
      Link Parent
      One of my personal favorite parts about Reddit's official app is that it is the top hit when you search alt right on the Google Play store https://i.redd.it/lx6rmiwomxb11.png They were also...

      One of my personal favorite parts about Reddit's official app is that it is the top hit when you search alt right on the Google Play store

      https://i.redd.it/lx6rmiwomxb11.png

      They were also advertising the site for a long time by listing it as "Reddit: top news, trending memes & cyrpto updates", which also drove me crazy

      https://redd.it/84pqjr

      15 votes
      1. [3]
        Deimos
        Link Parent
        Oh they finally changed that? It still had the "Crypto Updates" in it less than a month ago. That's why it was coming up for "alt right", it had the word "right" in the description as well as this...

        Oh they finally changed that? It still had the "Crypto Updates" in it less than a month ago. That's why it was coming up for "alt right", it had the word "right" in the description as well as this section about crypto (which includes "alt"):

        Bitcoin and All the Crypto
        Join the crypto revolution!
        Learn all about bitcoin, btc, eth, xrp, bch, eos, ada and other digital currencies. Did you hear about trx, neo, alt, ltc, xlm, nem, xmr, iota or dash? Check them out at r/ CryptoCurrency.

        Looks like it's "Reddit: Social News, Trending Memes & Funny Videos" now and they put a bunch of focus on chat in the description (and worked in "fortnite" to try to take advantage of those searches): https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.reddit.frontpage&hl=en

        18 votes
        1. Eva
          Link Parent
          Ahhh, growth hackers. Ever so cringe-inducing, ever so effective.

          Ahhh, growth hackers. Ever so cringe-inducing, ever so effective.

          6 votes
        2. dubteedub
          Link Parent
          Yeah, I saw the bit about Fortnite. Gotta get those SEO results up amirite?

          Yeah, I saw the bit about Fortnite. Gotta get those SEO results up amirite?

          2 votes
    2. rkcr
      Link Parent
      I love that autoplay is billed as a feature. I turn that off in every app I've ever downloaded because autoplay has never made my life better.

      I love that autoplay is billed as a feature. I turn that off in every app I've ever downloaded because autoplay has never made my life better.

      14 votes
    3. gksu
      Link Parent
      I'm not sure why, but the mobile site won't load for me in Android Firefox with uMatrix and Decentraleyes. It does that loading animation and never does. I have to use the desktop site always.

      I'm not sure why, but the mobile site won't load for me in Android Firefox with uMatrix and Decentraleyes. It does that loading animation and never does. I have to use the desktop site always.

      4 votes
    4. teaearlgraycold
      Link Parent
      I know it's bad form, but I'd read a blog where you just complain about reddit.

      I know it's bad form, but I'd read a blog where you just complain about reddit.

      4 votes
    5. Algernon_Asimov
      Link Parent
      The point of satire is to be painfully close to reality. It's basically Poe's Law in action: if it's difficult to tell the difference between satire and reality, you're doing satire right. Of...

      This may be satire, but the reddit mobile web site isn't far off from this any more:

      The point of satire is to be painfully close to reality. It's basically Poe's Law in action: if it's difficult to tell the difference between satire and reality, you're doing satire right.

      Of course it helps when reality decides to become its own satire!

      3 votes
    6. [3]
      starchturrets
      Link Parent
      Although, Deimos, whay browser is that in the first image you linked?

      Although, Deimos, whay browser is that in the first image you linked?

      1 vote
      1. [2]
        Deimos
        Link Parent
        I'm not sure, I just took those screenshots from some of the recent posts in /r/beta complaining about how much the app is being pushed (those posts are almost daily lately).

        I'm not sure, I just took those screenshots from some of the recent posts in /r/beta complaining about how much the app is being pushed (those posts are almost daily lately).

        5 votes
        1. starchturrets
          Link Parent
          Just checked, it's the Alien Blue reddit app. EDIT: Ps, sorry for the late response, I kinda forgot about it.

          Just checked, it's the Alien Blue reddit app.

          EDIT: Ps, sorry for the late response, I kinda forgot about it.

  2. SleepyGary
    Link
    This article is behind the times, no mention of unsolicited requests to location API and requests to enable notifications.

    This article is behind the times, no mention of unsolicited requests to location API and requests to enable notifications.

    20 votes
  3. [2]
    Eva
    Link
    Oh my God, this guy is great.

    Already a web developer? Buy the C programming language book here and get out while you still can.

    Oh my God, this guy is great.

    14 votes
    1. Nmg
      Link Parent
      To be fair, K & R is a great book

      To be fair, K & R is a great book

      2 votes
  4. [2]
    nonesuchluck
    Link
    How not to Design for the Modern Web
    13 votes
    1. Algernon_Asimov
      Link Parent
      Ha! I was scrolling down to post that here, until I saw your link. WARNING: Website contains strong language. NSFW.

      Ha! I was scrolling down to post that here, until I saw your link.

      WARNING: Website contains strong language. NSFW.

      4 votes
  5. [9]
    demifiend
    (edited )
    Link
    Is it just me, or is the modern web kinda worthless for anybody who doesn't profit from adtech?

    Is it just me, or is the modern web kinda worthless for anybody who doesn't profit from adtech?

    11 votes
    1. [8]
      Amarok
      Link Parent
      It's not just you. In terms of the totality of content, it's probably better than ever. In terms of being able to easily, reliably find both what you are looking for and interesting places to hang...

      It's not just you. In terms of the totality of content, it's probably better than ever. In terms of being able to easily, reliably find both what you are looking for and interesting places to hang out, I'd say we've regressed immensely since the late 90s. The whole 'net seems like an overly scripted amusement park aimed at children who are in desperate need of ritalin.

      Have you ever been at a restaurant and reading a menu, befuddled and unable to find the dish you're looking for because it's in a fancy flowery highlighted box that your brain has automatically identified as [advertisement space] and blocked it out? I want to know who to sue for this. :P

      28 votes
      1. [4]
        hackergal
        Link Parent
        Oh my fucking god this happens to me so much. What's worse is this happens to me with textbooks. Often they'll put key concepts in boxes like that which my brain has been trained to ignore due to...

        Have you ever been at a restaurant and reading a menu, befuddled and unable to find the dish you're looking for because it's in a fancy flowery highlighted box that your brain has automatically identified as [advertisement space] and blocked it out?

        Oh my fucking god this happens to me so much. What's worse is this happens to me with textbooks. Often they'll put key concepts in boxes like that which my brain has been trained to ignore due to associating that as ad space. I've had professors that were frustrated and confused about why so many students ignore those. I thought about it for a bit and realized that this is why.

        18 votes
        1. [3]
          Akir
          Link Parent
          News sites have got me ignoring things too. I want to go back in time and murder the person who invented the concept of 'highlighted quotes' on the internet. Actually, just the person who invented...

          News sites have got me ignoring things too. I want to go back in time and murder the person who invented the concept of 'highlighted quotes' on the internet. Actually, just the person who invented highlighted quotes in general.

          9 votes
          1. [2]
            frickindeal
            Link Parent
            Reader view in Firefox helps with that very effectively, but it still doesn't work with every site. When it's available, that's how I read every article.

            Reader view in Firefox helps with that very effectively, but it still doesn't work with every site. When it's available, that's how I read every article.

            4 votes
            1. Akir
              Link Parent
              I find myself using this feature more than ever. It's also useful for those articles with useless scroll animations as well.

              I find myself using this feature more than ever. It's also useful for those articles with useless scroll animations as well.

              1 vote
      2. [2]
        Tenar
        Link Parent
        having trouble finding it (the irony) but i read recently that it's nigh impossible to use google to find anything ~10 years old, due to the way they structure results (and not have to keep an...

        having trouble finding it (the irony) but i read recently that it's nigh impossible to use google to find anything ~10 years old, due to the way they structure results (and not have to keep an endless list). someone was looking for something they knew pretty much verbatim but couldn't find any results because the page was too old. weird stuff.

        10 votes
        1. Amarok
          Link Parent
          Reddit's gone the same way. I was trying to put together a list of the 'history of listentothis mod posts' so people could read the actual discussions (started by users, not mods) that resulted in...

          Reddit's gone the same way. I was trying to put together a list of the 'history of listentothis mod posts' so people could read the actual discussions (started by users, not mods) that resulted in all of the rules we've got over there. I couldn't find any of the older threads despite them being flaired as modposts - reddit's search simply refused to pull them up. Same with google. The common thread is they are all 5+ years old now.

          I did find an old comment I made a few years ago that had links to most of them, and they were still there. It was simply impossible to get them back from search engines even using targeted key phrases and date ranges.

          People once said the problem with computers is that they never forget. Looks like that was wrong - they just forget differently. Eventually there's just too damn much data to keep track of it all anymore.

          11 votes
      3. demifiend
        Link Parent
        I haven't, but that's probably because I've been using ad blockers for as long as they were available. Frankly, I liked the web better when AJAX was just a household cleaning product and not a...

        Have you ever been at a restaurant and reading a menu, befuddled and unable to find the dish you're looking for because it's in a fancy flowery highlighted box that your brain has automatically identified as [advertisement space] and blocked it out?

        I haven't, but that's probably because I've been using ad blockers for as long as they were available.

        Frankly, I liked the web better when AJAX was just a household cleaning product and not a technique for doing GET and POST operations without reloading the whole page.

        8 votes
  6. sasas09
    Link
    Ironically, the mobile version of this website has an impossible-to-close 'open in app' button.

    Ironically, the mobile version of this website has an impossible-to-close 'open in app' button.

    10 votes
  7. [7]
    Comment deleted by author
    Link
    1. [6]
      MacDolanFarms
      Link Parent
      Direct link, since Imgur albums won't load without JavaScript.

      Direct link, since Imgur albums won't load without JavaScript.

      5 votes
      1. novac
        Link Parent
        Thank you. I use NoScript and the bloated mess that is Imgur drives me crazy.

        Thank you. I use NoScript and the bloated mess that is Imgur drives me crazy.

        2 votes
  8. AFineAccount
    Link
    Don't forget to optimize your SEO! Make sure to put at least 2 internal links on every blog post! (I ghost-blog for an SEO company and this is disturbingly accurate to what web design is like now.)

    Don't forget to optimize your SEO! Make sure to put at least 2 internal links on every blog post! (I ghost-blog for an SEO company and this is disturbingly accurate to what web design is like now.)

    3 votes