chocobean's recent activity
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Comment on Used EVs are a bargain right now in ~transport
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Comment on Boomer hate in ~society
chocobean Link ParentUnless one falls on particularly hard times, generationally, most of the cohort of Boomers contracted Affluenza and consider their privileged circumstances matter of fact and baseline.Unless one falls on particularly hard times, generationally, most of the cohort of Boomers contracted Affluenza and consider their privileged circumstances matter of fact and baseline.
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Comment on Boomer hate in ~society
chocobean Link ParentCaveat, as you said, having that first $1000. Second one is do not be spooked if there is yet another market event and your $1000 goes to $700 after fees. It'll come back if you give it enough...If you started with $1,000 in 2001 and added $50 a month you would have $88,000 in that account today.
Caveat, as you said, having that first $1000. Second one is do not be spooked if there is yet another market event and your $1000 goes to $700 after fees. It'll come back if you give it enough time, but it can feel very scary. Third caveat, if you're 5 or so years from retirement don't do high/medium risk investments.
And for other new people : never do options or picking single stocks or do any of those wall Street bets type behaviour. That's not investment that's gambling with better odds but potentially far worse outcomes.
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Comment on What if AI just makes us work harder? in ~tech
chocobean Link ParentCollectively, yes, we have a lot of power, but they can divide and squish many of us individually all day every day. You're right of course we have to fight even if some of us wont make it.Collectively, yes, we have a lot of power, but they can divide and squish many of us individually all day every day. You're right of course we have to fight even if some of us wont make it.
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Comment on University at forty in ~talk
chocobean Link ParentIs there a way to go straight to graduate programs?Is there a way to go straight to graduate programs?
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Comment on Offbeat Fridays – The thread where offbeat headlines become front page news in ~news
chocobean Link ParentDo Aussies get to see parts of the archives on tv like Canada's Heritage Moments shorts? How will the newer generation learn of these fabulous memes?Do Aussies get to see parts of the archives on tv like Canada's Heritage Moments shorts? How will the newer generation learn of these fabulous memes?
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Comment on Boomer hate in ~society
chocobean Link Parent(this is the Boomer thread, ping, not the nuclear kind of boom, hehe) By the way did you know there is a Bookmark button beneath each comment / thread, and you can revisit bookmarked threads and...(this is the Boomer thread, ping, not the nuclear kind of boom, hehe)
By the way did you know there is a Bookmark button beneath each comment / thread, and you can revisit bookmarked threads and comments from https://tildes.net/bookmarks ?
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Comment on Boomer hate in ~society
chocobean Link ParentThe endless "CEO says a thing" articles these days can rival the "pastor says a thing" blinders in my protestant upbringing days. It's the natural outcome that when society worships wealth, the...The endless "CEO says a thing" articles these days can rival the "pastor says a thing" blinders in my protestant upbringing days. It's the natural outcome that when society worships wealth, the rich are our prophets.
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Comment on Boomer hate in ~society
chocobean LinkThis quote is a great illustration. In two sentences, you've painted a nebulous group with one broad stroke, and then pointed out how unfair that is. As a millenial, we've been blamed by many...People have been waiting for old people to die out since the Boomers were kids. There are also countless Boomers in America that are going to retire in poverty.
This quote is a great illustration. In two sentences, you've painted a nebulous group with one broad stroke, and then pointed out how unfair that is.
society will probably transfer its grievances from Boomers to Gen X then eventually to Millennials.
As a millenial, we've been blamed by many media articles and politicians since before avocado toast.
The young are blamed both for not wanting to do any work as well as the plummeting of alcohol sales for not wanting to party / marry / have kids. We're blamed for being too irresponsible for home ownership as well as being ridiculously entitled for wanting homes.
It's all a great big concerted effort to assign blame absolutely everywhere except towards the billionaire class. So, dont take the boomer hate personally, they don't mean you in particular, and also the people spewing garbage are also pointing at us all as well.
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Comment on Boomer hate in ~society
chocobean Link ParentPreface: yes we should be collectively more careful in our language of blame. I don't think most people see it as "looking forward to" boomer parents dying, but maybe a short hand of the...Preface: yes we should be collectively more careful in our language of blame.
I don't think most people see it as "looking forward to" boomer parents dying, but maybe a short hand of the intersection between "looking forward to finally being no longer housing insecure" and "it's natural and no one's fault that elderly parents will die before the kids do". So not rubbing their hands with glee, but not an unreasonable projection into the near future either.
Similarly, Boomers are a short hand for "those who have power" to be blamed for things (usually rightfully) since time immemorial. In a democracy, that would be the cohort that has enough population to affect positive changes and ensure positive legacy. Like in all references to people groups, you're going to have some who really are to blame, and a bunch that are suffering just as much as the outgroup. Take "white man" as a group, is every single member more privileged than everyone outside of the group, no, people are talking in aggregate, and that makes white men who have no privileges upset because as individuals they dont have any but are blamed along with the group. Short hands are unkind.
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Comment on Avi Lewis’s pledge to make proportional representation the (Canadian, federal) NDP’s one demand says he is serious about PR in ~society
chocobean Link ParentMany Canadians held our noses and voted for Carney because while his platform wasn't perfect, he seems like the best guy for the job at the moment. Perhaps we're getting the reverse here, with a...Many Canadians held our noses and voted for Carney because while his platform wasn't perfect, he seems like the best guy for the job at the moment.
Perhaps we're getting the reverse here, with a platform that is timely and necessary, even if perhaps the guy may not be your ideal pick. Thing is, even Obama wasn't perfect, and we all throught JT was going to go through with PR. So, hey, thanks for getting back to me. As long as he's not a demonstrated monster, I'll vote for better ideas that isn't just 2 versions of austerity + big corp benefits.
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Comment on So it turns out I was cheated on in ~health.mental
chocobean LinkMy friend, I recognized your user name and your story immediately, what an awful discovery! Therapy is a good thing, but it's not a miracle and it's also not free in terms of time or money. That's...My friend, I recognized your user name and your story immediately, what an awful discovery!
Therapy is a good thing, but it's not a miracle and it's also not free in terms of time or money. That's good to hear you're leaning on friends and family at this time.
I remember you musing about a clean break, and skimming through the old post, wondering if you're equip for loneliness again. Well..... The silver lining is that a cheating ex is about as clean of a break as one can get. Many of the behaviour puzzle pieces might slot into place now, especially if this is a pattern for them to mentally check out and find a different partner. And as for loneliness, single life won't be as lonely as what you already survived.
Your son is very small, and that's good you want to protect him from the ugly fall out. I would suggest a middle of the road approach, where you let him know all the answers are written down in this note stored in this locked box for when he reaches the age of (say) 14. It lets him know that you aren't too sad or angry or whatever to talk about it, that you have a definite timeline and not hand waving the conversation away, and it lets him know that it's okay to have big feelings, but it's also considerate to wait for appropriate times to share those big feelings.
The other things you can do is to cut loose and cry even bigger when he cries, and laugh even harder when he laughs, when you guys are talking about these changes and how they make him feel.
C S Lewis and his brother Warren were never able to process their grief about their mother dying in their childhood because their father wanted to protect the children from big feelings. So they were three people tip-toeing around each other's pain, assuming the other aren't ready to grief.
I already said therapy isn't for everyone every time, but I'm going to be an immediate hypocrite here and recommend that you still find other "non stake holder" adults your son can talk to if he wants to as well. A rarely seen but favourite Aunty or nearly adult grown up cousin perhaps. Sometimes we think we're holding it together well and behaving calm when our kids see through it, and knows that they can't come to us with their problems right then.
Don't forget to just spend time living in his world and becoming wrapped up in his interests too. Kids can ride out hardships and pains better than we can, when they have a companion who's moving at their speed and loving the same childhood favourites.
Hold off on dating for a bit, eh? Don't shop while you're hungry etc. Make your son the priority for the next year.
Wrapping it up: things super suck, but you've already gone past the worst of it, I think. Turns out, she's been a stranger for much longer than you knew, and you don't owe her anything anymore.
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Comment on So it turns out I was cheated on in ~health.mental
chocobean Link ParentAbsolutely, sometimes when one is in a low, low pit, it's the most dangerous time to look for a new therapist. There are some dangerously unqualified and themselves troubled people out there.Absolutely, sometimes when one is in a low, low pit, it's the most dangerous time to look for a new therapist. There are some dangerously unqualified and themselves troubled people out there.
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Comment on What are you reading these days? in ~books
chocobean Link ParentCongratulations! That's somewhat funny that you're reading WWZ to baby. Enjoy! Which books are you reading with baby?Congratulations!
That's somewhat funny that you're reading WWZ to baby. Enjoy! Which books are you reading with baby?
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Comment on Avi Lewis’s pledge to make proportional representation the (Canadian, federal) NDP’s one demand says he is serious about PR in ~society
chocobean Link ParentAh, well I had to ask, y'know, in case I missed some very publicly well known convictions or dark history that I hadn't heard of. :) Pardon my ignorance, but how does a party decide who gets to...Ah, well I had to ask, y'know, in case I missed some very publicly well known convictions or dark history that I hadn't heard of. :)
Pardon my ignorance, but how does a party decide who gets to runs where? Was it his personal choice to run in Vancouver Centre or did Jagmeet Singh / some other process appointed him there?
I'm slightly embarrassed to say that I have a similar aversion to Mark Carney. Not because of anything he's done so far, except for the pipeline and his doing nothing about housing and his overall big business friendly attitude, but more fundamentally, something about him makes it so that even the 3.8B announcement for nature protection can't overcome my uneasy suspicion of him. While I disagree with the conservative attack ads about Carney being sneaky, I still have a negative impression of him being a trickle down, supply side, anti-labour conservative.
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Comment on Moomins are the billion dollar comic franchise Americans don't know about in ~comics
chocobean LinkI've always known about Moonins but only watched some of the Japanese anime in recent years. Everything is cute but the stories are scary somehow. If someone has read the comics before and watched...I've always known about Moonins but only watched some of the Japanese anime in recent years. Everything is cute but the stories are scary somehow. If someone has read the comics before and watched the anime, let me know if it's always like that or just the anime or even just me being weird.
Click to expand spoiler.
Things like, the little sister transforming into another person and no one can recognize her. Or being on those clouds and then not being able to come down. Just quiet horror stuff -
Comment on Pam Bondi ousted as US attorney general in ~society
chocobean Link ParentIt's a sign of infighting and Trump's unhappiness. That is worth celebratingIt's a sign of infighting and Trump's unhappiness. That is worth celebrating
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Comment on Avi Lewis’s pledge to make proportional representation the (Canadian, federal) NDP’s one demand says he is serious about PR in ~society
chocobean Link ParentI wasn't familiar with Avi Lewis until this weekend. May I ask why you dislike him as a human being? Honestly, from his platform he's pushing everything I would have wanted from an NDP government:...I wasn't familiar with Avi Lewis until this weekend. May I ask why you dislike him as a human being?
Honestly, from his platform he's pushing everything I would have wanted from an NDP government: "He was largely seen as a front-runner during the campaign and pledged to disrupt Canada’s wealth concentration among the country’s highest earners" (CTV), stop price gouging, and "green new deal" . But I haven't heard of anything unsavoury about him as an individual
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Comment on Why the US Navy won't open Hormuz in ~society
chocobean Link ParentEspecially when one is going up against a "well liked" "popular" superpower, you don't want to ever be accused of starting anything, instead of justifiably defending themselves. If they had held...Especially when one is going up against a "well liked" "popular" superpower, you don't want to ever be accused of starting anything, instead of justifiably defending themselves. If they had held up Hormuz first, the US could have called their bluff, sent ships, then they'd have to back down OR attack it triggering NATO article 5.
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Comment on Why the US Navy won't open Hormuz in ~society
chocobean Link ParentEven if we hadn't been bombarded by idiocy for the past year, even in the best of times, why would these allies absorb casualties for the US as a shield? It seems like that would be the kind of...But doing so risks casualties that haven't been seen in the US since WWII. It seems like the US thought they could do this using other navies' as shields to test Iranian doctrine, but the other navies come from countries that have been insulted, abused, and threatened with invasion of the last year.
Even if we hadn't been bombarded by idiocy for the past year, even in the best of times, why would these allies absorb casualties for the US as a shield? It seems like that would be the kind of operation that would be super unpopular at home even when things are friendly.
Canada suffered the third-highest absolute number of deaths of any nation among the foreign military participants, and one of the highest casualties per capita of coalition members since the beginning of the war (Wikipedia, Canada in the war in Afghanistan)
I'm just glad we're not going in there this time.
[useless moaning]
Even at a "bargain", those used are still $25,000+ CAD used. Life has just gotten crazy expensive. We have an aging vehicle that I've been mulling over selling, and it's only aging more every day, but the trouble has always been that I don't have the money to replace it with anything other than another one just as old and falling apart. I think if wages have kept up with pricing this kind of price tag would be fine. I remember new cars being <$20,000 and my salary hasn't moved much since.