Gaywallet's recent activity
-
Comment on Donald Trump posted on Truth Social this morning that "a whole civilization will die tonight, never to be brought back again" as his threatened attacks on Iranian infrastructure loom ahead of deadline in ~society
-
Comment on Donald Trump posted on Truth Social this morning that "a whole civilization will die tonight, never to be brought back again" as his threatened attacks on Iranian infrastructure loom ahead of deadline in ~society
Gaywallet Link ParentOh no I got that, I'm just pointing it out in clear terms because I've seen it a lot on the internet. Like yes, we're extremely frustrated and disappointed in our government as well, but...Oh no I got that, I'm just pointing it out in clear terms because I've seen it a lot on the internet. Like yes, we're extremely frustrated and disappointed in our government as well, but functionally this isn't something that US civilians can do.
-
Comment on Donald Trump posted on Truth Social this morning that "a whole civilization will die tonight, never to be brought back again" as his threatened attacks on Iranian infrastructure loom ahead of deadline in ~society
Gaywallet Link ParentSurely civilians can win against a military with a budget of $850B this year. That's entirely reasonable.Short of an actual armed civil uprising
Surely civilians can win against a military with a budget of $850B this year. That's entirely reasonable.
-
Comment on Competence is lonely. Nobody talks about why. in ~health.mental
Gaywallet Link ParentOh certainly! Work can be draining in so many different ways. Long hours are tough, I'd imagine even more so if you find them socially draining. Many coworkers have claimed that they don't really...Oh certainly! Work can be draining in so many different ways. Long hours are tough, I'd imagine even more so if you find them socially draining. Many coworkers have claimed that they don't really know me because I don't spend my time socializing at work outside of the minimum necessary niceties. I do respond if folks reach out or ask questions or try to socialize with me, but I'm fairly good at setting boundaries and redirecting when I'm feeling drained more-so than usual. Outside of very few individuals at my job that I actually like (and even then, not a ton), I also find work socialization draining. If I were more sensitive to that or didn't find some of the kinds of socializing I do energizing I could see how it would be hard to find the energy to socialize.
Either way I don't really see work itself being the problem so much as it is about the appropriate balance of a social life with everything else happening in one's life. Out of curiosity, if people checked in on you at work the way the author is suggesting, would you find it reduced your loneliness or would it just drain you even more?
-
Comment on Competence is lonely. Nobody talks about why. in ~health.mental
Gaywallet Link ParentThis feels like the entire thrust of the article and its kind of frustrating they don't recognize or even address it. I see myself in the article in that at work, I am absolutely the highly...it seems to me that highly competent people are also Workaholics and this is what often compromises other areas of life, such as being social and I can see that leading to loneliness.
This feels like the entire thrust of the article and its kind of frustrating they don't recognize or even address it.
I see myself in the article in that at work, I am absolutely the highly competent one. It's why I'm in charge of all the things I'm in charge of, and why I'm regularly the first person my director taps whenever we venture into anything new, need new standards, get a new tool, or anything else where that expertise matters. I'm also regularly tapped for firefighting teams, the "oh shit" we need something now to give to senior leadership.
But I also don't see myself in the article at all because I have such a rich social life. I'm part of an artist collective, I participate in local activism, I'm a leader on two employee resource groups at work, I help run a social media website, I'm poly with multiple partners, I'm a DJ, and I regularly go out dancing. My social calendar is absolutely booked solid, and I have endless people I can socialize with at pretty much any minute. But basically all of that (absent the ERG leadership) is a life outside of work which seems to be entirely absent from what the author is writing about. Of course you would feel socially isolated if you spend all your waking hours at work and don't have a social life? Like that's the definition of social isolation?? If you're going to make work your life, you need to have work friends and you probably need to be going places outside of work with these folks to facilitate genuine social interactions that aren't just about whatever project you're working on.
-
Comment on So it turns out I was cheated on in ~health.mental
Gaywallet Link ParentJust beware that your partner might do the same to your kids. Be vigilant. You're his parent, trust your intuition! I'm sure you'll know how much to share and what is better shared when he is older.My dad worked hard to alienate us from my mom and it worked. My sisters haven't spoken to her in decades. I came to my senses; I don't want that kind of experience for my kids.
Just beware that your partner might do the same to your kids. Be vigilant.
I want to point out my son is 6. My ex's kids are older, and can handle that; my son cannot. He is not emotionally mature enough for that kind of information.
You're his parent, trust your intuition! I'm sure you'll know how much to share and what is better shared when he is older.
-
Comment on So it turns out I was cheated on in ~health.mental
Gaywallet (edited )Link ParentYes, I don't mean to oversimplify things and ultimately it's up to OP to decide what is right for their kids, but I also wanted to provide this particular feedback since it was lacking and I think...Yes, I don't mean to oversimplify things and ultimately it's up to OP to decide what is right for their kids, but I also wanted to provide this particular feedback since it was lacking and I think it's an important consideration.
-
Comment on So it turns out I was cheated on in ~health.mental
Gaywallet LinkFirst off I want to say that I'm really sorry you're going through this. You deserve better. They're an asshole for doing what they did. Please seek professional help! A therapist is your best...First off I want to say that I'm really sorry you're going through this. You deserve better. They're an asshole for doing what they did. Please seek professional help! A therapist is your best friend to help process something like this, but also tell all your close friends. I know that if one of my good friends was going through this that I would want to be available for them to vent, to help build them back up, or otherwise help in any little way I could.
I'm trying to remain calm for the sake of the kids (especially mine) but it's really, really hard.
Honestly, why? Even your kids would realize that this is a messed up thing for your partner to do and that reacting emotionally is a completely normal thing. If anything your kids might find it extremely strange that you are calm when you should be having a completely normal strong emotional reaction to what happened. If anyone I knew was not strongly reacting to something this devastating I would think something was very wrong! Reacting to this in an appropriate manner will help your kids truly absorb an important lesson about behavior and how your actions can hurt others, will give them an opportunity to provide you support and show their love (you might be their parent but love is not a one way street), and it will help garner trust and grow your relationship with them - too often parents shield information about their lives from their kids but are then surprised when their kids mirror the behavior and shield information about their lives from their parents... if you want a truly close relationship with your kids you need to at times treat them like your adult friends, at least when it comes to being vulnerable with them.
Lastly, it's not your responsibility to obfuscate what your partner did to your children. Your partner was the one who violated that trust and hurt you. Your children will find out the whole story eventually and they will rightfully pass judgement on your partner for not considering your feelings and your children's feelings when they made their decision. It's in no way manipulative to be honest with them and you do not owe your partner anything when it comes to telling your side of the story. In fact, you have direct proof that your partner was gaslighting you, abusing you, and more - I would argue that you need to set the story straight before your partner does the same to your children (they may gaslight or manipulate them when explaining their side of the story), and that this may be the perfect opportunity to teach your children about manipulative people and how difficult and confusing it all can be. After all, you spent a good chunk of your life and parented with this person! This shows how people are often a mix of good and bad and can teach them to be more introspective about their future relationships as well as set them up to be more resilient should they face abusers in their future.
-
Comment on Iām supposed to be visible today ā but why? in ~lgbt
Gaywallet Link ParentIt's complicated. Thank you for bringing up some of the positives about visibility - since it's not the focus of the article, the author doesn't spend a lot of time talking about them. It's...It's complicated. Thank you for bringing up some of the positives about visibility - since it's not the focus of the article, the author doesn't spend a lot of time talking about them. It's important to note that visibility can have other positives as well! In the book The End of Bias by Nordell, Jessica, the author highlights a few studies in which the very presentation of diversity/visibility can be helpful for a handful of other reasons (decreases bias towards the group which is visible) so long as it's done in a way that highlights differences rather than similarities.
I posted this article, however, because it's important to note that visibility can be a double-edged sword and there are many reasons to not be visible. The same book mentioned previously also tackles this in one of its later chapters, showing off how the framing of visibility messages is important to how it influences people (similarity based messaging entrenched existing biases). With trans people increasingly being used as a scapegoat or bogeyman to pass regressive legislation (or rule in the supreme court), it's important to highlight many of the reasons that visibility can be harmful.
Frankly I wish we didn't live in a society where visibility could be so weaponized, but many states are explicitly trying to track trans people and the US is already unfortunately quite actively erasing trans people (also known as genocide) by incremental legislative and judicial policy and rulings. It's important to consider one's own privilege and status when determining whether one is reasonably safe to be visible and to examine visibility through as many lenses as possible.
-
Iām supposed to be visible today ā but why?
22 votes -
Comment on The average US college student is illiterate in ~life
Gaywallet LinkI love how the author provided absolutely nothing but his own anecdotal experience. A cursory look at actual standardized tests which have reading/comprehension sections of college aged students...I love how the author provided absolutely nothing but his own anecdotal experience. A cursory look at actual standardized tests which have reading/comprehension sections of college aged students such as the SAT and NAEP show close to no real decline in performance over the last 20 years. It's hard to even begin to account for the changes in language that an increased digital world have wrought (grammar itself has changed drastically and thus the small drop in scores could be a reflection of this or other factors) and this doesn't capture digital literacy at all.
I exited out of the article after just a few sentences since it was clear the author had no interest in anything but confirming his own biases and venting about his experience with college-aged kids. He probably shouldn't be teaching if he's already so hostile to the kids coming in and their world view, beliefs, and interests.
-
Comment on LLMs can unmask pseudonymous users at scale with surprising accuracy in ~tech
Gaywallet Link ParentIn several states you can change your name for gender reasons without publication! You just check a box that says it was for gender reasons.In several states you can change your name for gender reasons without publication! You just check a box that says it was for gender reasons.
-
Comment on LLMs can unmask pseudonymous users at scale with surprising accuracy in ~tech
Gaywallet Link ParentFor extra security, be sure to change your legal name every few years just like your passwords.For extra security, be sure to change your legal name every few years just like your passwords.
-
Comment on British Columbia announces it is making daylight time permanent after years of promises in ~society
Gaywallet Link ParentPermanent DST has been blocked by a single jerk in SoCal. God I wish we could get rid of him šCalifornia
Permanent DST has been blocked by a single jerk in SoCal. God I wish we could get rid of him š
-
Comment on <deleted topic> in ~society
Gaywallet LinkThe goon-max paradigm entering mainstream slang isn't really all that surprising given how the internet has evolved. It's caught on because everything is hyperbolic and whether it's designed to...The goon-max paradigm entering mainstream slang isn't really all that surprising given how the internet has evolved. It's caught on because everything is hyperbolic and whether it's designed to simply be consumed (the goon side being primarily brainrot) or to enrich in some fashion (intent is important for this paradigm, clear intent is what defines maxxing) is a fight we've been seeing on a broad/global scale. The major platforms naturally goonify because it's driven by enshittification, whereas there's still a significant amount of content from individual creators on the internet designed to deep dive on subjects or otherwise enrich or maxx individuals. Of note in the context of this article, maxxing doesn't have to be enriching, or at least enrichment could exist across different axes - the "enrichment" could be in reference to the financial wealth of the US, the health of the US army, the number of foreigners killed and so on.
I think there's an interesting conversation to be had about who's perspective is taken into consideration when we consider something to be either gooning or maxxing, as one could easily argue this is either lethalitygooning or lethalitymaxxing, depending on your view of the US military's recent actions involving foreign governments under the direction of president orangeman.
-
Comment on Other people might just not have your problems in ~life
Gaywallet LinkA great piece for the folks out there who chastise themselves too often, have impostor syndrome, or otherwise struggle with something and just can't muster up the self compassion to be okay with...A great piece for the folks out there who chastise themselves too often, have impostor syndrome, or otherwise struggle with something and just can't muster up the self compassion to be okay with something being a work in progress or simply just hard for them.
One note that the author leaves out, this works both ways. We really shouldn't judge people by the things they struggle with. This is exemplified by the subreddit /r/thanksimcured - which is a sub dedicated to making fun of the dumb simple suggestions that people who don't have a problem often provide to people who are struggling. It's really simple to say "just eat less" to someone who struggles with their weight, "just smile more" to folks who are struggling with depression, or "have you tried celebrating and enjoying when your partner finds someone new?" to someone struggling with jealousy. For advice to be useful to someone who's struggling with a particular aspect of their life, you need to appropriately put yourselves in their shoes. This can be quite a difficult exercise if they have problems that you do not. The best that someone can do is to transpose the concept of how they feel about something they struggle with onto a completely different issue, which can never capture the specifics of how someone else struggles with something, just the broader ideas.
-
Comment on More than 200 women allege drugging with a diuretic to make them urinate during interviews by senior French civil servant in ~news
Gaywallet Link ParentOh... I need a coffee I skimmed the article but completely missed that. Yeah that's inexcusable. Although the timeline is a little unclear, 2018 to 2019 could be as little as 1 month and as much...Oh... I need a coffee I skimmed the article but completely missed that. Yeah that's inexcusable. Although the timeline is a little unclear, 2018 to 2019 could be as little as 1 month and as much as 23.
-
Comment on More than 200 women allege drugging with a diuretic to make them urinate during interviews by senior French civil servant in ~news
Gaywallet Link ParentOkay I'm not excusing anyone's behavior but like, I wouldn't even think that I was drugged if I had to pee really bad during an interview? It almost feels like identifying that there was a pattern...Okay I'm not excusing anyone's behavior but like, I wouldn't even think that I was drugged if I had to pee really bad during an interview? It almost feels like identifying that there was a pattern in the first place would require someone paying close attention
-
Comment on US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention to end all monkey research in ~science
Gaywallet Link ParentRight, but as I'm sure you're aware, 90% of the work is finding the few possibilities that might work first, because testing them in the lab is expensive. If you can target faster and more...As I understand it, it seems useful for hypothesis generation, but maybe not so useful for hypothesis testing in it's current state.
Right, but as I'm sure you're aware, 90% of the work is finding the few possibilities that might work first, because testing them in the lab is expensive. If you can target faster and more accurately, you can scale up lab work because the bulk of the effort is being spent there. With all that being said, as you mentioned, it's early days and I don't see why these kinds of tools cant be useful in hypothesis testing as well. Keep in mind combined with tools like alphafold, we can already get a lot further without touching a cell than we could ten years ago. It probably won't be long before we can simulate a lot more with similar statistical models.
I hope we can use machine learning to better categorize large datasets to help patients soon.
On the patient side of things that's a fair deal of what I'm doing. Helping to structure data and build models to gather wider-scale insight that's useful to patients. That's less on the biology side of things and more on the combing through clinical data, but ML is useful for that too. Some of the cross disciplinary stuff is a lot of fun, like I helped work on a model that combined self-submitted image data (cell phone pictures) with referrals to streamline fast-tracking the patients most likely to have skin cancer. It may not be a perfect model and miss some patients, but for a first pass to be able to get a large number of patients who could have been waiting months to a year to see a derm to see one in days to weeks is a huge win IMO.
-
Comment on US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention to end all monkey research in ~science
Gaywallet Link ParentWell beyond alphafold which I'm sure you've heard of and the new product alphagenome, here's a paper that came out last year (evo1), and an article on on it's next iteration (evo2), a generative...I'm not actually familiar with the advances you mention here. Do you mind filling in an old immunologist on what we've learned with AI? In my experience there just hasn't been much of anything that has impressed me.
Well beyond alphafold which I'm sure you've heard of and the new product alphagenome, here's a paper that came out last year (evo1), and an article on on it's next iteration (evo2), a generative AI tool used for genomics research. I'd also point you at this paper on microbiome applicability which is more of a review of the current state and where opportunities are than any particular breakthroughs because I did mention the microbiome as well.
I agree this would be ideal, but I'm incredibly skeptical of the ability to computationally model complex biology. At that point we would essentially be stimulating life itself!
Well yes and no. AI is pretty good at picking up statistical patterns in the data, and since life is derived from other life, it makes sense that the statistical patterns are going to represent the building blocks used and the generalities of life without the need to simulate it. I have pretty high confidence that we're going to make a lot of leaps and bounds using these kinds of tools but it's probably going to take us twice as long to start to unravel the why behind it. Finding the patterns is a lot easier than making sense of them.
National and military intelligence another 110B, DHS (ICE, CBP, secret service, etc.) and DOJ (FBI, DEA, ATF, US Marshalls) 150B, state and local police 180B. The list goes on and on. We have a lot of armed federal and state officials who can be directed by the president or who would forcibly protect him.