fairewinds's recent activity

  1. Comment on Long-lost Bram Stoker story discovered in Dublin in ~books

  2. Comment on Weekly thread for casual chat and photos of pets in ~life.pets

    fairewinds
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    While we don't have a cat yet (we'd love to adopt one someday!), our former neighbors sent us a photo of theirs. It did a silly and hurt itself a little, and was forced into a cone of shame. He...

    While we don't have a cat yet (we'd love to adopt one someday!), our former neighbors sent us a photo of theirs. It did a silly and hurt itself a little, and was forced into a cone of shame. He looked so grumpy yet so dapper. I don't know how cats pull that off.

    It was also so nice to get that message out of the blue. It's been a while since I've truly felt happy and that silly billy tipped the scales towards that. We're going to see our friends soon and I'll pet the heck out of that cat as a reward.

  3. Comment on What is some life advice that has stuck with you throughout the years? in ~life

    fairewinds
    Link Parent
    I'm slowly learning this applies to any relationship in life. Not just with romantic partners, but friends and family, work, your routine, and most importantly, yourself. Doesn't mean you have to...

    I'm slowly learning this applies to any relationship in life. Not just with romantic partners, but friends and family, work, your routine, and most importantly, yourself.

    Doesn't mean you have to abandon all of those relationships if they don't work out; but you deserve a shot at a calmer, safer life.

    16 votes
  4. Comment on An American traveling to Spain/Portugal in ~travel

    fairewinds
    (edited )
    Link Parent
    I second Airalo! I have a Pixel as well and the app works well with its eSIM capabilities. I live in the Netherlands and use it when I visit family back home in Canada, so your use case here...
    1. I second Airalo! I have a Pixel as well and the app works well with its eSIM capabilities. I live in the Netherlands and use it when I visit family back home in Canada, so your use case here should be fine.

    • If you're visiting in the summer and aren't used to heat, pack a (stylish!) sunhat for you and your mom and carry a thermos of cold water when you're out. I'm built for heat and still do this myself.

    • Download an offline copy of digital essentials, like maps, translations, and such. Google Maps and DeepL let you do that in-app. Good for when you find yourself without WiFi and roaming capabilities!

    • Carry some cash with you. As someone who's used to nothing but card machines everywhere, I've found myself in a pinch or two with cash-only vendors while traveling. Also, bathrooms in Europe are sometimes paid, so you'll need coins.

    1. Learning a couple of basic Spanish and Portuguese phrases is good, in case you run into someone that can't speak English. (Rare inside tourist hotspots and major cities, but it happens.) Things like "hi", "bye", "good morning", food items you like to buy on the regular, etc.

    Have fun! We're traveling in Portugal right now and having a blast :)

    8 votes
  5. Comment on How do you listen to music? in ~music

    fairewinds
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    I like the convenience Spotify and Deezer offer, but I also try my best to buy music directly from the artist. Bandcamp is great at compensating artists, so I try to buy music from there if it's...

    I like the convenience Spotify and Deezer offer, but I also try my best to buy music directly from the artist. Bandcamp is great at compensating artists, so I try to buy music from there if it's offered.

    Also, I've been trying to build a CD collection (apparently they're old-school now!) so I buy a physical copy whenever I can. It's just cool to have a shelf of CDs, with the art and inserts and everything! There's just something so satisfying from buying it, unpackaging it, then dimming the lights, putting the disc in your machine and just listening to it from start to finish. It's so much less twitchy than streaming services, and I love that.

    Of course, that means there's more overhead for maintenance, so I've been looking for an app that'd help me unify my local music with a streaming service.

    2 votes
  6. Comment on The loneliness thread in ~talk

    fairewinds
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    I've grown up in a more oriental culture before moving to North America when I was around 18, and although I've suffered from loneliness before my move due to family issues and personality...

    I've grown up in a more oriental culture before moving to North America when I was around 18, and although I've suffered from loneliness before my move due to family issues and personality predispositions, I feel like spending time in different cultures opened my eyes to why occidental countries are more prone to depression and loneliness.

    However, I'm not saying that I know the absolute truth or anything, it's just some things I've personally noticed and I hope it can help others to hear it! So here goes:

    To different degrees, eastern cultures tend to emphasize individualism less, and following a societal code more.

    Both approaches have their pros and cons, of course, but I've noticed that focusing less on individualism gives groups of people a stronger sense of belonging. It keeps families more tight-knit, school/work-mates are closer to one another since they have more in common, etc. That is, it sets up the expectation that everyone is "in it together" and that they'll all look out for one another. It also motivates everyone to keep conflict at a minimum and encourage forgiveness amongst each other, so the social structure doesn't fall apart. Also, with the proper parental guidance, it forces kids to learn a lot of social skills early on in life, as well as how to interact with others and how to keep themselves and others socially healthy.

    When you have friends and family - like it or not - that you know will be there for you - like it or not - when you're expected to interact with said friends and family and share, at the very least, general topics or hobbies with them... it's hard to feel lonely.

    It's also easier to combat depression with that setup, too, because (a) you'll have at least one or two people who you're close to that you can share your troubles with, and (b) they'll have learned how to empathize with you, and you'll have learned how to get things off your chest in a healthy way. Not only that, the people around you will be an obligatory 'escape' for you from the endless spiral of life's troubles and other sorts of 'mental beasts'.

    That is: I think the best medicine against loneliness and depression is being obligated to have some sort of social brotherhood in your life, where everyone is involved with the others, keep an eye out for each other in, and educate themselves on how to deal with others properly and mitigate conflict.

    I hope this will help someone! I'd love to hear your thoughts about this, too.

    3 votes
  7. Comment on What have you been listening to this week? in ~music

    fairewinds
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    I've been listening to Pinback! It's an indie rock band with a very mellow sound, and a very steady beat. Personally, listening to them feels like riding a sturdy boat on slightly wavy seas. My...

    I've been listening to Pinback! It's an indie rock band with a very mellow sound, and a very steady beat. Personally, listening to them feels like riding a sturdy boat on slightly wavy seas.

    My favourite songs are Crutch, Charborg, and Shag.

    4 votes
  8. Comment on Inside the Netflix binge factory in ~tv

    fairewinds
    Link Parent
    True. I think the best solution would be for people to learn that binge watching isn't good for them, and to learn not to do it. Of course, it's not good to offer the potential for binge watching,...

    True. I think the best solution would be for people to learn that binge watching isn't good for them, and to learn not to do it. Of course, it's not good to offer the potential for binge watching, either.

  9. Comment on Inside the Netflix binge factory in ~tv

    fairewinds
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    I feel like in this cycle of growth and competition among show and movie producers and distributors, nobody's paying attention to the rise of the binge watching habit. I was really never a fan of...

    I feel like in this cycle of growth and competition among show and movie producers and distributors, nobody's paying attention to the rise of the binge watching habit.

    I was really never a fan of binge watching things, mainly because I feel like I never have time to sit on important events unraveling or plot twists happening. I like to let things sink in and for my mind to race about them, so the story matures in my head, and that way I become more attached to what I'm watching and enjoy it more in the long term.

    But if i sit down for a marathon of so many new shows and movies, I don't feel like I've enjoyed any of them, let alone kept up with what's happening or remembered what I watched for all this time. It feels like the equivalent of eating too much candy, it hurts and you don't even enjoy the candy.

    2 votes
  10. Comment on Looking for good vegan meal plans that are right around 2000 calories in ~health

    fairewinds
    Link Parent
    To be honest, I think that's the root of your problem right there. In order to not eat too much or too little, you need to be cooking when you're peckish, so that you're eating when you're hungry....

    Right now I don't have a routine. I don't even make grocery lists. So I just eat whatever. I fall into that, "Oh I am hungry, better eat something." And then I fix something quick and easy that isn't great for me. That or I'll eat plain boiled potatoes every night because it's so easy you know.

    To be honest, I think that's the root of your problem right there. In order to not eat too much or too little, you need to be cooking when you're peckish, so that you're eating when you're hungry. If you're prompted to go find something to eat when you're hungry, you'll have to use a lot of willpower to make something decent to eat; you just want to sate your hunger with anything, especially if that's how you're used to living.

    You need to have an idea of what you'll be eating before you feel hungry. I know that's what you're already thinking of doing, but I wanted to articulate all of this. If you know what you're going to make for dinner, in the morning, and you have the ingredients in the fridge, and the recipe at hand while you cook (especially if it's quick and easy but also nutritious) you'll be set!

    Also, if you find that you don't enjoy cooking, start watching videos of people doing it, like Gordon Ramsey or something. It doesn't even have to be educational; watching a good chef cook is just really inspiring!

    As for eating vegan, look up alternatives/substitute charts. If you're not familiar with cooking, that will help you adapt a lot of dishes. Substitutes are easy to handle (and in some cases easier than the original ingredients) and are usually commonly found in supermarkets. Also, eat lots of spinach and beans - your hair will thank you.

  11. Comment on <deleted topic> in ~tildes

    fairewinds
    (edited )
    Link Parent
    I feel like that's the point, though. Tildes is here to foster in-depth and civil discussion while respecting privacy, but Reddit feels like a combination of community-specific news aggregate,...

    Each one of these sites has been (to a point) a nice addition to Reddit, but could never replace the variety of topics and the amount of content Reddit provides.

    I feel like that's the point, though. Tildes is here to foster in-depth and civil discussion while respecting privacy, but Reddit feels like a combination of community-specific news aggregate, advice seeking, and general chatter. To me, it feels like the sites have two different purposes.

    Edit: I just found this post by Deimos talking about this.

    4 votes
  12. Comment on Trying to become healthier in ~health

    fairewinds
    Link Parent
    Aw man, sorry I couldn't help! Just so you know, I'm rooting for you :) Good luck!

    Aw man, sorry I couldn't help! Just so you know, I'm rooting for you :) Good luck!

    1 vote
  13. Comment on Trying to become healthier in ~health

    fairewinds
    Link Parent
    I find that the trick to curbing bad habits is to gradually replace them with good ones. Killing a habit just leaves a void inside you that you need to fill - that isn't bad at all; we all need to...

    I find that the trick to curbing bad habits is to gradually replace them with good ones. Killing a habit just leaves a void inside you that you need to fill - that isn't bad at all; we all need to satisfy ourselves with nice things!

    The way I curbed soda was by getting myself used to other things that are also tasty. So first I started with drinking less every day and keeping an eye out on how much my body can 'handle' vs how much more I'm craving (if I find that my stomach starts feeling icky from all the sugar, I stop mid-can). I satisfied the craving for more soda by drinking other things, like 100% orange (or wtv) juice, sparkling water (seltzer), tea (hot or iced)... there's a ton of stuff to drink!

    Then I started introducing things with 'natural' sugars into my diet, so I can get my body and my gut biome used to their taste. And by that, I mean fruits :P They're incredibly tasty, and if you don't want to take the time to prepare them (it's like 5 mins of washing and chopping though) you can buy them pre-cut at the supermarket! In the beginning you won't feel like eating them, and that's okay, you can start with a serving a week or so.

    Slowly, and with just a little nudging, you'll find that you want to have the alternatives more and more, and the soda less and less. Soda actually tastes icky compared to all these other things; your body just craves the insane amounts of sugar in it, so it convinces you that it's tasty.

    Also, buying a Sodastream or a soda maker and making your own is a great alternative, as long as you don't load it with sugar. Homemade ice tea is also delicious, all you need is a kettle, any tea, a lemon, ice cubes, and a fridge.

    1 vote
  14. Comment on I want Friends :) in ~tildes

    fairewinds
    Link Parent
    I also think that having a search feature will make it easy to find threads you've read previously that you might need to come back to. I feel like if we don't have a search feature, many...

    I also think that having a search feature will make it easy to find threads you've read previously that you might need to come back to. I feel like if we don't have a search feature, many important threads will be lost as time goes on with no way to easily go back to them.

    6 votes
  15. Comment on What’s the craziest team building / off-site that you’ve ever had the misfortune to be part of? in ~life

    fairewinds
    Link Parent
    Ah man, that definitely does sound absolutely bonkers... but hey, at least you're safe and now have a crazy story to tell at parties!

    Ah man, that definitely does sound absolutely bonkers... but hey, at least you're safe and now have a crazy story to tell at parties!

    1 vote
  16. Comment on Word Association in ~talk

  17. Comment on Word Association in ~talk

  18. Comment on Word Association in ~talk

  19. Comment on Let's speak in foreign (non-English) languages! in ~talk

    fairewinds
    Link Parent
    مبروك! يلا النجاح إن شاء الله :)

    مبروك! يلا النجاح إن شاء الله :)

    1 vote
  20. Comment on Word Association in ~talk