ingannilo's recent activity
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Comment on Honey did nothing wrong in ~tech
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Comment on What were your favorite games that you played this year, and why? in ~games
ingannilo (edited )LinkDefinitely put more time into minecraft than anything else this year, mostly because I finally stumbled into the technical aspects of the game (automation, farms, and eventually storage tech)...Definitely put more time into minecraft than anything else this year, mostly because I finally stumbled into the technical aspects of the game (automation, farms, and eventually storage tech) which really opened it up to me.
Also I really loved Lies of P. Super challenging souls-like built around the narrative of Pinocchio. Truly one of the hardest games I've ever played, but loads of fun.
I played Starfield, but for maybe 20 hours total before getting a little "over it". The fallout-ish "you can pick up everything" inventory system but none of the good crafting/dismantling stuff from fallout really left me wanting.
Recently I started STALKER 2. If the major patches rolled out a little sooner, then it may have ended up my GOTY, but I'm only about 8 hours into it because I forced myself to wait until they pushed a few patches before starting. Really excited about it though. So far (just finishing up in the lesser zone now) it's amazing.
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Comment on What were your favorite games that you played this year, and why? in ~games
ingannilo Link ParentMy wife and I each did a playthrough of stray last year, and they were awesome. It was super cute and absolutely had its tense moments. I'd love to find more games like that.My wife and I each did a playthrough of stray last year, and they were awesome. It was super cute and absolutely had its tense moments. I'd love to find more games like that.
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Comment on Shaken baby syndrome has found new life as abusive head trauma in ~health
ingannilo LinkLike /u/zestier, I am a newer parent. My three year old fell off a lawn chair and hit his head on the concrete stoop a few weeks ago. I rushed him to urgent care, where they said they didn't have...Like /u/zestier, I am a newer parent. My three year old fell off a lawn chair and hit his head on the concrete stoop a few weeks ago. I rushed him to urgent care, where they said they didn't have appropriate means to treat a toddler; raced from there to the pediatric ER. Eventually he gets seen and they're able to close his head wound. But I remember feeling so frustrated at the amount of time that went into basically interrogating myself and my wife about what happened, taking lots of photos, having three or four people in and out of the room before they even talked about sewing him up.
I was happy with his care overall, but it really made me feel bad. Like, I didn't do this to my kid! What kind of monster could? I kiss is tinyest injuries to make then feel better; I pet his back and snuggle him to sleep every night; I get up 3-5 times per night to soothe or feed or provide whatever he needs. I know these folks couldn't know that, but the feeling of having to assert my love for my kid was very strange. You could feel the suspicion in the air, and for a few moments I was really worried that I'd have to somehow prove that my kid fell over in our front yard... How would you even do that?
All this is to say that I'm sympathetic with the tone of the article. I cannot imagine how helpless a parent accused but innocent of this kind of abuse would feel. I'm glad we have safeguards in our society and people who are looking out for children. I grew up in an abusive home, and it's not a good childhood. But zeal must be tempered with absolute honesty and transparency because the damage that could be done to everyone involved if a doctor or prosecutor gets it wrong is immeasurable.
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Comment on Pornhub to block access in thirteen states as age-verification laws expand across US in ~tech
ingannilo Link ParentDefinitely agree with your points, that legislation cannot help here, and that folks will always find ways to be confused about sex. I am very against this particular legislation and all laws of...Definitely agree with your points, that legislation cannot help here, and that folks will always find ways to be confused about sex.
I am very against this particular legislation and all laws of its ilk. I don't think we can legislate morality, and this seems to fall into that camp.
My comment above is trying to think through how lawmakers rationalize passing what seems like an unpopular law, how they might sell it. I think about the ways women I know were manipulated online at a very young age to do and share things they really didn't want to do or share. Mostly on the web-chat sites of the mid 2000s. I do think that some of that manipulation was made easier by the victims' early exposure to porn.
My answers to my wife so far have been that right now we cannot even predict what the web will be like when our kids reach puberty, and that we'll have to be agile, honest with our kids, and open-minded about cultural changes to handle things well. I think it's these concerns in politicians and their constituents that allow the tech lobby to sell these kinds of (bad) laws.
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Comment on Pornhub to block access in thirteen states as age-verification laws expand across US in ~tech
ingannilo Link ParentI agree with your main thesis, that this is really about data. I know the FL legislature well enough to know that they're not all hip to that reality though, and I think that legitimate concerns...I agree with your main thesis, that this is really about data. I know the FL legislature well enough to know that they're not all hip to that reality though, and I think that legitimate concerns about kids being exposed to unrealistic sex at an early age is the elevator pitch from the tech folks (who just want data and whose lobby almost certainly authored the bills) to the politicians (who are always seeking a way to appear hard-working while serving their money masters).
There may or may not be an interest in rug-sweeping some of the social impacts of kids exposure to sexual content online. I'm thinking more of the spaces where kids can be manipulated and exploited. Early exposure to porn may set expectations in kids' minds regarding what others want from them.
I don't claim to have answers here. Wife and I talk a lot about what we'll do to manage our son's web traffic down the road. I like what you describe, but I'm not sure I have the time to execute the way you do. I certainly don't expect these draconian laws to help the situation. I'm just observing how they might rationalize them.
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Comment on Suggestions for a tablet or a light laptop in ~tech
ingannilo LinkLots of good ideas here. For my two bits, I'm a ThinkPad fan-boy with a real love for their older models which were more repairable than the X1 carbon discussed in earlier comments. I daily drive...Lots of good ideas here. For my two bits, I'm a ThinkPad fan-boy with a real love for their older models which were more repairable than the X1 carbon discussed in earlier comments.
I daily drive a T480 now and by my standards it is highly portable for its size (14 inch). My previous daily was a smaller X230, which was excellent but is arguably too old to consider for a purchase today. If you like the modularity and can tolerate the slightly larger screen than requested, I'd look into the T-series on low budget, or P-series for higher budget options. I'm not sure what happened to the X-series, but there were some more modern revisions that I would consider if portability is priority.
The most important thing for me is repairability, and slightly older ThinkPads are great for this. Framework I believe is the only other option that comes close in terms of modularity and ease of fixing/replacing/upgrading bits.
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Comment on Pornhub to block access in thirteen states as age-verification laws expand across US in ~tech
ingannilo Link ParentI feel that this needs examination. I married someone about half a generation younger than me, and her experience in life, largely due to sexualization online has manifested numerous serious...but we're decades into that reality and there hasn't been any kind of uptick in issues with sexuality that I'm aware of.
I feel that this needs examination. I married someone about half a generation younger than me, and her experience in life, largely due to sexualization online has manifested numerous serious issues in our relationship.
My very early exposure to porn (from my dad leaving VHS porn playing while intoxicated) definitely had an impact on my development. My wife's experiences absolutely had powerful impacts on her. The differences in our exposures to sex have been significant, even with relatively close ages at first exposure just due to the nature of the media.To be clear, I am not in favor of these laws because I think the only result will be people's personal info being exposed in future hacks. As others mention, horny kids will find a way. But I also don't think it's wise to totally rug-sweep the whole conversation.
My personal opinion is that kids learning about sex is a good thing. I'd rather my son first be exposed to sex the way real people do to rather than some of the out-there fantasy-driven stuff that dominates porn sites.
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Comment on Best new install steps for Windows 11 gaming PC? in ~tech
ingannilo Link ParentQuick bit of feedback. I used Titus' script on my second to last win 11 install. it ended up nerfing the Webcam on my t480. Couldn't figure out why and after a few weeks I gave up and reinstalled...Quick bit of feedback. I used Titus' script on my second to last win 11 install. it ended up nerfing the Webcam on my t480. Couldn't figure out why and after a few weeks I gave up and reinstalled without running Titus' script.
I guess if you don't read through the code and understand everything the script does, then you shouldn't run it. Probably pretty obvious, but I was a little too naive. Just wanted to share.
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Comment on Struggling with nihilism and the inability to enjoy things in ~health.mental
ingannilo Link ParentI'm happy to see the more jovial tone in your reply there. This stuff is weird, and the void is loud. My friend used to tell me, when playing chess, "you've just gotta make a move, man". Surely he...I'm happy to see the more jovial tone in your reply there. This stuff is weird, and the void is loud.
My friend used to tell me, when playing chess, "you've just gotta make a move, man". Surely he was just getting bored with waiting, but those words stick with me in a lot of different contexts.
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Comment on Hi, how are you? Mental health support and discussion thread (December 2024) in ~health.mental
ingannilo LinkI found out late last night that my wife has been cheating on me. For the last five years I have taken care of everything for her in terms of housing, cars, insurances, basically all financials,...I found out late last night that my wife has been cheating on me. For the last five years I have taken care of everything for her in terms of housing, cars, insurances, basically all financials, while she bounced from college program to program, failing out of physics, astronomy, nursing, and now aviation mechanic school.
We had arguments, but I always supported her and encouraged her to be positive. If this didn't click, that's okay. You'll find your thing.
We had a kid. I take care of him. She goes to school half heartedly. Lots of parties and festivals that leave me at home alone with my son. I love being home with my son, so I tolerate it. He's three now.
I found out last night that she's cheated on me. Two people, at least three different events. Most recently with a kid from her mechanic class. She'd been staying close to school on weekdays and being more mean and avoidant when home. Doing weird stuff while out with friends. Blaming me for her behavior.
I feel so unbelievably hurt right now. I stayed home from work today, with her. We talked a lot. Idk what is going to happen. I desperately want us to be okay, but I have always said that I'd stay with her if and only if she is faithful to me. We've had lots of struggles before this, but this is an absolute and total violation of the one rule I had in our relationship.
I'm worried that if I don't end things, that she won't change. She'll continue being mean to me, leaving me holding the bag on every "responsibility" front, and then using my exhaustion as an excuse to rationalize lying and cheating on me.
I'm worried that if I do end things I am giving up on the deepest love I have ever found, violating my wedding vows and promises to her grandmother, and giving up on my son having a happy childhood.
This isn't appropriate probably, but I cannot talk to anyone. If I share with my family, they'll never accept her back into the fold. Friends are all split loyalty, and she's lied to them about me to poison the water there. I just feel awful. If not for my son, I think I would've ended myself last night. As is I just wish I could teleport him and myself somewhere far away, or have some magic tool to undo so much of the past.
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Comment on What programming/technical projects have you been working on? in ~comp
ingannilo LinkI'm still a humble newb in the software world, but I just finished my toughest project yet in the C++ Intro to Programming class I'm taking. It was to code a dice poker game, where the user...I'm still a humble newb in the software world, but I just finished my toughest project yet in the C++ Intro to Programming class I'm taking. It was to code a dice poker game, where the user "rolls" five 6-sided dice, and receives a number of points based on the probability of getting certain "hands" (pairs, three of a kind, full house, straight, et cetera).
It took me three sit-down-and-think sessions, but I came away with a solution I really liked. Later I googled and found, of course, that it's a standard problem in coding classes. But to my surprise most of the solutions I found were (imo) pretty inelegant compared to mine. Where most used lots of branching if statements and arrays, mine used concise loops and wherever possible stored info as vectors. I'm excited to see what feedback my prof gives.
It's fun being a student again when I can actually find time to do the work. This week I was basically catching up on four weeks of material I fell behind on due to my own teaching load/ caring for my son/ generally burning out.
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Comment on What games have you been playing, and what's your opinion on them? in ~games
ingannilo Link ParentPlaying FO4 in survival forces a more role playing vibe, because everything is much more dangerous, you need to monitor food, water, and radiation, addiction is crippling, and death has real...Playing FO4 in survival forces a more role playing vibe, because everything is much more dangerous, you need to monitor food, water, and radiation, addiction is crippling, and death has real teeth.
Playing FO4 on very hard (ime) was super frustrating because it still felt like the same game just with much more bulletspongy enemies.
If you're looking for a more careful experience in the commonwealth, then I think you'll enjoy the survival mode most.
My only survival playthrough was cut short by quest breaking bugs with a mod I had installed, but I was really enjoying it up to then.
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Comment on Using winutil or MicroWin to disable Windows Recall is breaking File Explorer in ~tech
ingannilo Link ParentThis is older, but I just saw your reply. I can't imagine that the laptop in question has co-pilot+. It's a ThinkPad from 2018-ish.This is older, but I just saw your reply. I can't imagine that the laptop in question has co-pilot+. It's a ThinkPad from 2018-ish.
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Comment on 2024 United States election megathread in ~society
ingannilo Link ParentWhen I filled out my ballot I was very surprised by the bold text under this and amendment 3. It's as though they've allowed the right to campaign on the fucking ballot! Literally never has the...When I filled out my ballot I was very surprised by the bold text under this and amendment 3. It's as though they've allowed the right to campaign on the fucking ballot!
Literally never has the bold text on the ballot that's meant (I thought) to explain what the legal language of the amendment is saying, strayed so far from explaining the content of the amendment and gone so deeply into trying to tell people how they ought to vote on that issue.
I had heard that the ballot language was found to be unconstitutional. At the time I wasn't aware of thr exact language that'd appear. Now I'm wondering if that's the part that was problematic. When I heard there were problems with the ballot language, I just assumed it was a problem with the amendment itself. But now it makes more sense. How this garbage got on the ballot is a mystery, but heads should roll.
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Comment on 2024 United States election megathread in ~society
ingannilo Link ParentThis is the messaging that killed the Harris campaign and democratic platform, imo. I can't say where these prospering people are. I believe they exist, but I do not see them in my day-to-day. My...This is the messaging that killed the Harris campaign and democratic platform, imo.
I can't say where these prospering people are. I believe they exist, but I do not see them in my day-to-day. My neighborhood and my family (I'm a math professor at a state college) have really suffered economically over the last five years like never before. Two 50% hikes in housing costs, continuously rising food and energy costs, and pretty much all consumables.
I believe that the Biden administration inherited a trashed economy due to the poor management and policies of the firet Trump administration and the pandemic; I believe that they did some very clever things to avert the kind of total financial meltdowns we see in places like Turkey, caused by similar mechamisms. However it's not the case that for people like myself and those around me, that "the economy is better than ever" . I don't go on vacations or buy nice things for my kid. I struggle to stay on top of the mortgage. I've had to accept that things I took on in the past, that by my reasonable planning should have been manageable, became unmanageable, and I've had to let go of some of those obligations and accept the damage to my reputation and credit score. It's been incredibly hard, but if I have to choose between housing my family or paying a credit card bill, I gonna do the former.
The left did very little to speak to folks like me. They still got my vote, for so many reasons it's hard to list them all, but their messaging on the economy totally missed me. And it is not at all hard for me to see how, if you're not all-in on the social and democratic principles espoused by the left, then voting for the side that acknowledged your struggle and in some way claims they can help, might be tempting.
I wish this was a surprise. It was closer than I would've expected over the summer. The Harris campaign did a great job of improving their numbers in thr last few months, especially considering the assassination attempts. But most folks are primarily worried about their money. Most regular (read: poor) people have seen their quality of life fall, a lot since 2018/2019. One party messaged to that, and one party did not. I am not surprised that the party acknowledging the elephant in the room won.
I do know that Harris had one major platform point on the housing crisis, but even to a liberal Iike me, it really didn't seem like a good fix. Just offering down-payment assistance won't help in the long run if the mortgage is unaffordable; my instinct was that this would also raise the cost of houses long-term.
It's a sad day. The party steamed straight ahead in the fog of non-communication and echo chamber polling. We could and should have done better to avoid the iceberg. We could and should have talked to our neighbors, asked how they were doing. We could and should have been more aware of what the half of our country that aren't idealogically aligned with us were struggling with and worried about, besides the idealogical stuff. That's where we lost and I hope we learn the lesson.
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Comment on Cooking with black plastic is particularly crucial to avoid in ~health
ingannilo Link ParentNot the person you replied to, but I cooked in a commercial kitchen for a while. Lots of stuff will stick to stainless no matter what you do (looking at you, garlic!) but if you use reasonable...Not the person you replied to, but I cooked in a commercial kitchen for a while. Lots of stuff will stick to stainless no matter what you do (looking at you, garlic!) but if you use reasonable heat and some oil then plenty of things won't stick in a way that's problematic.
My go-to for cooking most things that might stick is cast iron. It's a little hefty, but once you season them they're very nonstick and definitely devoid of weird chemicals. They also help with nice even heat distribution.
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Comment on Non-fiction books about mentally surviving a far right regime in ~books
ingannilo Link ParentI just wanted to reply here to give a third for Man's Search for Meaning. It's obviously focused on an extreme circumstance, but in terms of actual book content and OP's request, it's literally...I just wanted to reply here to give a third for Man's Search for Meaning. It's obviously focused on an extreme circumstance, but in terms of actual book content and OP's request, it's literally the exact thing being asked for. It's all about the psychology of surviving the holocaust, and it's very well written. I stumbled onto a pdf of it years ago and ripped through it because I just couldn't put it down.
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Comment on From "anti-core" to "felt inflation": Or how I calmed my populist demons in ~finance
ingannilo (edited )Link ParentI try to be mindful of the people in different circumstances than mine. But at the same time I live in a low cost of living area. My town is one of the most affordable in my state, and my state is...I try to be mindful of the people in different circumstances than mine. But at the same time I live in a low cost of living area. My town is one of the most affordable in my state, and my state is one of the more affordable ones. Not west coast, not major metro area, not coastal. It's hard to imagine that the population at large isn't feeling what I'm feeling, unless, like you say, they bought a home prior to 2019 and locked in their homestead exemption (which I was denied due to forgetting to update my address on my friggin drivers license). Fixing that for this year, but it can't be undone.
I'm a mathematician. I'm training with programming. I'd love to get my hands on the relevant datasets. It's just so very different than the world I grew up in. And I think that sentiment is the pull that fascists use.
It's okay that the world is changing. I don't long for the 1990s. I just want to be able to support my family and give my kid a life that at least approaches comfort. And right now, despite my training, despite home ownership, and despite a salary that I would have never believed when I was in grad school, somehow my standard of living just keeps slipping.
I'm typing in a bit of a rush because I'm getting my kiddo ready for daycare, but it seems like profiteering in every sector is catching up to us, and skills haven't grown to match. I'll give one example:
Last year my 2014 Mazda 3 throws a rod the day after I change the oil. It has 125k miles. I ask the mechanic how this could happen. Turns out the rhetoric about 10k mile oil changes that Mazda and all other auto makers have been pushing is total garbage, and I killed it by not doing 3-5k oil changes like I did on all my other cars. Why do they claim you can go 10k between? I don't know. New engine is $7k, paint is garbage, has some body damage from getting rear ended the previous year. Total loss. I buy the best vehicle I can with my tax return, a 2007 toyata sienna. Legendary reliability. Should go to 300k miles. Test drive is solid. No engine codes. Great. Literally the second day the transmission starts slipping. Drop the pan. Swap the filter. Drain and fill the fluid. A month later the transmission pops. This is where the story really starts. AAA recommends a shop. I call them to ask for a rough quote. $4k. Okay. Timeline? One week. Okay. They take over a month to swap in a junkyard transmission which is broken. Another week to put in a second unit. It comes home after 5 weeks and immediately acts up. Transmission isn't shifting right and whines terribly. Shop has a warranty, but they argue with me for days about honoring it. I had to get media and better business buero in to get them to agree. They keep it for a month. When I get it back it lasts two whole days before the noises are back. Van is once again at their shop. Total cost so far? $5300. Total time? Like three months. Will they get it right this time? No idea.
Idk. I'm just complaining now. But I think my point is that simultaneously with the price increases, we're seeing a skill deficit. Things are more expensive and worse executed. I'd never ever seen this kind of incompetent from any mechanic. Let alone one that charges $200/hour for shop time. But they all charge that now. These guys advertise on NPR. they have great ratings. They're recommended by AAA... but they suck.
This is my morning/not quite awake brain talking, but I see examples of this stuff everywhere. And it hurts the cause to pretend it hasn't been happening. My generation (millenials) really need to step up the skills and engage with the world in an honest and meaningful way if things are to ever improve. It's as though we've fallen into the belief that if the stats can be twisted to support the claim that we're doing well, then we're doing well. But we are not. And I do think a lot of that comes down to a lack of willingness to take responsibility for our output.
From the political angle, that's a big piece of the right's pull. They don't take responsibility for shit, but they espouse the desire to do so. It'd be great to see my generation liberal politicians steal back the responsibility flag, and generally start caring about effective action while caring less about spinning stats.
I'll whipe my ass and shut up now.
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Comment on From "anti-core" to "felt inflation": Or how I calmed my populist demons in ~finance
ingannilo LinkThis is the closest I've seen to someone making sense of the messaging I've been hearing the last few years. If our inflation metrics ignore the critical areas where inflation has done the most...This is the closest I've seen to someone making sense of the messaging I've been hearing the last few years.
If our inflation metrics ignore the critical areas where inflation has done the most damage, then for sure the reporters boasting about how strong our economy is, using those metrics, are going to disconnect from the perceived inflation in our everyday lives.
I, for one, would like to see this fellas style show up in more of that messaging. But more to the point, I'd like to see the hands on the wheel get a little more reactive to the bumps in the road this fella is referring to.
I do not know for sure, but I think that housing cost is a part of the core inflation metric, and given the fraction of your average person's income that goes to housing, and given how steeply it has risen and continues to rise in cost, I still find it hard to believe "the numbers". I am not a "fake news" populist or anything of the sort. I just a guy who can't afford rent in my town anymore. My housing costs went up 50% in 2020. Then another 50% in 2022. Then another 50% last year. I was forced to move twice due to landlords selling out from under me, and then (when I bought a home to avoid the racket of rent hikes) I was hit with such a massive property tax spike in my first year that it literally raised my monthly mortgage payment by half.
This is not the reality discussed in most economic circles, and until establishment democrats acknowledge it, they will continue losing the weak willed to the other party. I don't personally think the other party offers a fix. Also I abhore just about everything they've been doing for the last four decades. But if the left refuses to acknowledge the problem, then the draw of "elites don't get your struggle" absolutely will continue to pull folks into the fascists orbit, where they will eventually sink deeper and deeper until the light is all gone.
In the lawsuit filed by Wendover and Legal Eagle, they claim Honey's actions were unlawful:
I'm definitely not a lawyer, but Devon Stone (Legal Eagle) is, and it'd be reputation-destroyingly bad for him to allege illegal action on Honey's behalf if that was transparently not the case. Maybe the attribute stealing is gray-area, or maybe it's well established law, but for these guys to very publicly allege that Honey broke the law leads me to believe that there is some precident here. I'll keep reading the suit and update if I find something concrete.