I can't cry for some reason

I find I have to really lean into it. Similarly to you I just sort of don't except in extreme cases. Maybe we're not the same, but I definitely cry far less than I used to.

What I would do is if it comes on, ride the feeling. Don't think you need to cry, don't worry about not crying, try to follow that feeling and any minor impulse you have to cry by staying with it. It will eventually, over instances, build up and possibly release. Frankly, just siting with the emotion might make you feel better, crying or not.

Very much so. Really wish I could find a context in which any such outlet would be socially acceptable.

I know exactly where my issue comes from: I'm not young by any reasonable definition, but I became the oldest living man in my extended family pretty suddenly, about 7 years ago.

Between a heavy grief load, a brutal dispute with my employer, and suddenly having just about everyone in the family looking to me for support and stability, I had to lock shit down hard, and keep it there.

The moments when I cry only happen in private, and only when I'm blindsided. There have been exactly two in those seven years.

I had that problem for a really long time. I cried about 10 times before ~25. In retrospect, I kinda understand why I wasn't able to cry, but what cured me was completely unexpected.

I watched Grave of the Firelies one evening and this movie just broke me in half, manipulated me into crying like nothing else ever had. Without spoiling too much, this movie just assaults you with sad moments and when you think there's hope, the movie swiftly crushes those hopes.

I've been able to cry normally ever since. Mushrooms and pot kinda helped too.

I don't have the same issue, though I used to struggle more to cry when I needed to than I do now. I often watch movie scenes, or listen to music that moves me to tears - it doesn't have to be highbrow, it can be the end of Encanto or V for Vendetta or the beginning of Up, it can be Taylor Swift or Pink or the song you listened to when your dog passed away.

Lately it's been "hopecore" videos on Tiktok - videos of sappy moments, families reunited, stories about dogs being given a happier life, even if for a short while, in a new adoptive home, etc.

I was in a session with a mental health professional and was surprised to found myself crying. At the time, it was finding my situation described back to me by another person, and my hearing about (what was worded like) someone else's situation that did it for me. I also found it easier to talk about what's going on in the third person. Not to say I was diagnosed with a disassociative condition or anything but I was having an "episode" of it, I guess.

I also found if someone is really busy just surviving through something, it's not the time to cry until afterwards.

Why the curiosity, if I may ask? Do you want to cry and need an emotional outlet but just can't?

I just watch a documentary about martian landers or other space probes where decades of work lead to critical moments where telemetry is beamed back indicating successful landings or deployments or whatever, and Mission Control goes nuts - I start the waterworks.

If you are a man, it could just be your hormones. Lots of trans women report that they are able to cry much more easily after starting to take estrogen.

I’m a cis man and only cry every few years as well. I don’t feel like crying is stigmatized in my relationships, but the tears don’t come even if I am feeling sad.

The last time I cried it was because I rewatched the ending of the regular show and it really resonated with my experience of COVID being the end of my traditional “college” experience with no prior warning. Instead of knowing the day everyone will go their separate ways, COVID just happened and pretty much everyone I knew was just gone.

Anyways, don’t think there’s something wrong with you. I think the ability to cry is largely hormonal and you may just have a higher “cry tolerance” than you used to.