Having the thoughts doesn't mean anything at all about whether you're a good or bad person; they're just artifacts of cognition. Brains are peculiar things, and sometimes they kick up thoughts the...
"Meditation" is a fairly broad toolbox of techniques, and if the purposive "clear your mind" Zen style isn't helping, you might want to start with the "mindfulness" [Vipassana] type in a guided group if there's one in your area.
Mindfulness meditation doesn't emphasize clearing your mind of thoughts, but rather observing and being at peace with the thoughts that arise. One of the techniques is to observe your thoughts as neutral mental objects that come and go, rather than emotionally reacting and classifying thoughts as good or bad. By decreasing their salience, you don't invite your intrusive thoughts to recur in such attention-grabbing, demanding or threatening ways.
However, if, as @eladnarra said, you find that your intrusive thoughts are impairing your life, by all means consult a professional. I suffered through a lot of years with intrusive thoughts of self-harm that made activities as simple as driving a car or cooking into horror shows.
A generations-deep family history of OCD and autism-spectrum disorders meant that my intrusive thoughts were actually something that could be relieved with medication and CBT. Meditation was the clean-up, not the cure.
That's a good point about medication potentially being helpful - I don't have experience with that side of things so I didn't include it in my post, but perhaps I should have anyway. Your...
That's a good point about medication potentially being helpful - I don't have experience with that side of things so I didn't include it in my post, but perhaps I should have anyway.
Your discussion of mindfulness techniques actually reminded me of a radio program [CW: descriptions of violence, self harm, and other intrusive thoughts] that I heard a year or two after my couple bouts of intrusive thoughts. It's how I recognized that I'd sort of accidentally stumbled onto one of the ways they can be managed.
Others have suggested speaking to a professional. I second this. I will also offer advice based on my personal experience with meditation and terrifying intrusive thoughts and memories. My first...
Exemplary
Others have suggested speaking to a professional. I second this. I will also offer advice based on my personal experience with meditation and terrifying intrusive thoughts and memories.
My first recommendation would be to read "Mindfulness in Plain English". It helped me with my fear of intrusive thoughts. Mainly with a mantra that robbed such thoughts of their power, "this is just a thought, it can't hurt me." Particularly when you're meditating, you're not acting in any way. You're not acting on any thoughts at all, so during that time no thoughts have any power over you. Once you convince yourself of that, you may find yourself having an easier time accepting that from time to time, these thoughts will occur.
Advanced: Step 1: When meditating, these thoughts will arise. It is your job to say, "I'm meditating right now, I don't have time for these thoughts. I may consider them later if I choose to." Once you're able to do that, you'll find you have power over these thoughts.
Step 2: After you have been meditating regularly for some time(months? years?) you can shift tactics slightly. You pick a time and you allow one of these thoughts / memories / moments to arise. I found the best time to do this was at the tail end of a strong meditation session. "Ok nasty thought, I'm ready for you." I would then allow the thought to arise. It would bubble up slowly to the top of my previously blank mind. I wouldn't be scared of it. I wouldn't fight against its coming. I wouldn't react to it at all. I would accept it as part of me. It would arise. After it had arisen, I would study it. I would observe this terrible thought. Why was it terrible to me? Why was I scared of it? How had it affected me?
Step 3: Repeat the process above until you are at peace with the thought and the fact that it is a part of you, though not the whole of you.
This process helped me deal with some truly horrible thoughts that no longer bother me at all. If they do arise they're more like blurry grey memories than the vivid technicolor horror shows they once were.
I've had a couple instances of intrusive thoughts. It came completely out of nowhere and wasn't based on my personal beliefs or triggered by any event. For me, it helped to recognize that these...
I've had a couple instances of intrusive thoughts. It came completely out of nowhere and wasn't based on my personal beliefs or triggered by any event.
For me, it helped to recognize that these thoughts, as long as I didn't verbalize them and hurt other people with them, didn't mean anything about me. They were very upsetting, but I realized that becoming upset, focusing on them, trying to get rid of them, and berating myself only made them worse. So when I noticed it happening, I simply acknowledged it with no judgement, telling myself they meant nothing.
That said, this realization wasn't a silver bullet, and if these thoughts are affecting your day to day life I highly recommend seeing a therapist to talk about strategies.
I've found this comic (depicts violence against a stick figure child, just in case someone doesn't want to see that) to be strangely comforting when it comes to accepting intrusive thoughts and...
I've found this comic (depicts violence against a stick figure child, just in case someone doesn't want to see that) to be strangely comforting when it comes to accepting intrusive thoughts and the mind wandering into places you don't want it to go in general.
Though as you said, consciously knowing that you don't need to hold yourself responsible or be afraid of every thought that flows through your head doesn't solve it in every case.
I constantly get intrusive thoughts, especially when I am anxious. Three things help me personally, and they may or may not help you. First, I usually instantly react to a thought by verbally...
I constantly get intrusive thoughts, especially when I am anxious.
Three things help me personally, and they may or may not help you.
First, I usually instantly react to a thought by verbally responding to it.
For instance, if an anxious thought such as me wanting to get in a fight with someone because I don't like their attitude, I just say "no" out loud, or usually do a mini scream. I sound crazy but it helps me move on from the bombardment of bad thoughts. Talking through it OUT LOUD helps me but it DOES NOT help me when I talk it through in my head.
The second thought is to visualize the thought completely without trying to react to it. It sounds contradictory to the first but usually I do this when the first option does not help me after some time. Visualize whatever is going through your mind and do not try to rationalize it. Instead view it for what it is, keep your minds eye on it, then slowly watch it fade away. Don't try to push it away but instead focus on it completely until you get control over the fear so you can gently and naturally leave it alone.
The third thing that helps me is semi religious. I don't follow any religious doctrine, but I do believe in a monotheistic God that guides each one of us and I believe we are all parts of a whole, a greater being. Simply focusing on the "divine spark" of life, or God if you will, helps me relax. I know that this thought, image, fear, or situation is a test to help me become a stronger, better, more focused person.
Some other tips include: meditation (this helped me a lot but I've gradually replaced it with prayer)
and deep breathing (probably the most helpful to relax immediately, breathe very slow to relax the body and mind and exhale much longer than you inhale.)
I hope this helped you because it helped me to get these thoughts out. One last thing. Writing down your feelings and emotions really helps too. So does talking to other people. PM me if you need more strange techniques, but otherwise, I hope you have an amazing day and remember to relax :)
Having the thoughts doesn't mean anything at all about whether you're a good or bad person; they're just artifacts of cognition. Brains are peculiar things, and sometimes they kick up thoughts the same way flotsam and jetsam arrive on the waves. "Unwanted intrusive thoughts are reinforced by getting entangled with them, worrying about them, struggling against them, trying to reason them away. They are also made stronger by trying to avoid them. Leave the thoughts alone, treat them as if they are not even interesting, and they will eventually fade into the background."
"Meditation" is a fairly broad toolbox of techniques, and if the purposive "clear your mind" Zen style isn't helping, you might want to start with the "mindfulness" [Vipassana] type in a guided group if there's one in your area.
Mindfulness meditation doesn't emphasize clearing your mind of thoughts, but rather observing and being at peace with the thoughts that arise. One of the techniques is to observe your thoughts as neutral mental objects that come and go, rather than emotionally reacting and classifying thoughts as good or bad. By decreasing their salience, you don't invite your intrusive thoughts to recur in such attention-grabbing, demanding or threatening ways.
However, if, as @eladnarra said, you find that your intrusive thoughts are impairing your life, by all means consult a professional. I suffered through a lot of years with intrusive thoughts of self-harm that made activities as simple as driving a car or cooking into horror shows.
A generations-deep family history of OCD and autism-spectrum disorders meant that my intrusive thoughts were actually something that could be relieved with medication and CBT. Meditation was the clean-up, not the cure.
That's a good point about medication potentially being helpful - I don't have experience with that side of things so I didn't include it in my post, but perhaps I should have anyway.
Your discussion of mindfulness techniques actually reminded me of a radio program [CW: descriptions of violence, self harm, and other intrusive thoughts] that I heard a year or two after my couple bouts of intrusive thoughts. It's how I recognized that I'd sort of accidentally stumbled onto one of the ways they can be managed.
Others have suggested speaking to a professional. I second this. I will also offer advice based on my personal experience with meditation and terrifying intrusive thoughts and memories.
My first recommendation would be to read "Mindfulness in Plain English". It helped me with my fear of intrusive thoughts. Mainly with a mantra that robbed such thoughts of their power, "this is just a thought, it can't hurt me." Particularly when you're meditating, you're not acting in any way. You're not acting on any thoughts at all, so during that time no thoughts have any power over you. Once you convince yourself of that, you may find yourself having an easier time accepting that from time to time, these thoughts will occur.
Advanced: Step 1: When meditating, these thoughts will arise. It is your job to say, "I'm meditating right now, I don't have time for these thoughts. I may consider them later if I choose to." Once you're able to do that, you'll find you have power over these thoughts.
Step 2: After you have been meditating regularly for some time(months? years?) you can shift tactics slightly. You pick a time and you allow one of these thoughts / memories / moments to arise. I found the best time to do this was at the tail end of a strong meditation session. "Ok nasty thought, I'm ready for you." I would then allow the thought to arise. It would bubble up slowly to the top of my previously blank mind. I wouldn't be scared of it. I wouldn't fight against its coming. I wouldn't react to it at all. I would accept it as part of me. It would arise. After it had arisen, I would study it. I would observe this terrible thought. Why was it terrible to me? Why was I scared of it? How had it affected me?
Step 3: Repeat the process above until you are at peace with the thought and the fact that it is a part of you, though not the whole of you.
This process helped me deal with some truly horrible thoughts that no longer bother me at all. If they do arise they're more like blurry grey memories than the vivid technicolor horror shows they once were.
I hope this helps. Good luck.
I've had a couple instances of intrusive thoughts. It came completely out of nowhere and wasn't based on my personal beliefs or triggered by any event.
For me, it helped to recognize that these thoughts, as long as I didn't verbalize them and hurt other people with them, didn't mean anything about me. They were very upsetting, but I realized that becoming upset, focusing on them, trying to get rid of them, and berating myself only made them worse. So when I noticed it happening, I simply acknowledged it with no judgement, telling myself they meant nothing.
That said, this realization wasn't a silver bullet, and if these thoughts are affecting your day to day life I highly recommend seeing a therapist to talk about strategies.
I've found this comic (depicts violence against a stick figure child, just in case someone doesn't want to see that) to be strangely comforting when it comes to accepting intrusive thoughts and the mind wandering into places you don't want it to go in general.
Though as you said, consciously knowing that you don't need to hold yourself responsible or be afraid of every thought that flows through your head doesn't solve it in every case.
I agree with going to a therapist. It can be very helpful.
I constantly get intrusive thoughts, especially when I am anxious.
Three things help me personally, and they may or may not help you.
First, I usually instantly react to a thought by verbally responding to it.
For instance, if an anxious thought such as me wanting to get in a fight with someone because I don't like their attitude, I just say "no" out loud, or usually do a mini scream. I sound crazy but it helps me move on from the bombardment of bad thoughts. Talking through it OUT LOUD helps me but it DOES NOT help me when I talk it through in my head.
The second thought is to visualize the thought completely without trying to react to it. It sounds contradictory to the first but usually I do this when the first option does not help me after some time. Visualize whatever is going through your mind and do not try to rationalize it. Instead view it for what it is, keep your minds eye on it, then slowly watch it fade away. Don't try to push it away but instead focus on it completely until you get control over the fear so you can gently and naturally leave it alone.
The third thing that helps me is semi religious. I don't follow any religious doctrine, but I do believe in a monotheistic God that guides each one of us and I believe we are all parts of a whole, a greater being. Simply focusing on the "divine spark" of life, or God if you will, helps me relax. I know that this thought, image, fear, or situation is a test to help me become a stronger, better, more focused person.
Some other tips include: meditation (this helped me a lot but I've gradually replaced it with prayer)
and deep breathing (probably the most helpful to relax immediately, breathe very slow to relax the body and mind and exhale much longer than you inhale.)
I hope this helped you because it helped me to get these thoughts out. One last thing. Writing down your feelings and emotions really helps too. So does talking to other people. PM me if you need more strange techniques, but otherwise, I hope you have an amazing day and remember to relax :)
If these thoughts impair you in a significant way, seek a mental health professional.