33 votes

Should I stay or should I go now?

30 comments

  1. [13]
    Minori
    Link
    I follow the author's concerns, but I personally feel pretty confident that blue states in the US will be safe through the Trump term. Transgender people in countries like the UK have it much...

    I follow the author's concerns, but I personally feel pretty confident that blue states in the US will be safe through the Trump term. Transgender people in countries like the UK have it much worse, and the US is still a global trendsetter. There will probably be more bifurcation with Republican controlled states sadly becoming more hazardous while we see more transgender refugee policies like Minnesota.

    14 votes
    1. [2]
      DefinitelyNotAFae
      Link Parent
      I think Pritzger and Walz stand firm, for example, but in 2 years, if there's not a backlash and Congress doesn't flip back even partially we could lose some of our progressive governors in those...

      I think Pritzger and Walz stand firm, for example, but in 2 years, if there's not a backlash and Congress doesn't flip back even partially we could lose some of our progressive governors in those blue states. That puts a lot of people at risk of losing healthcare (abortion as much as HRT) if the states don't push back, or if Medicaid funding is cut for states that don't comply. At what point do they food to save the many over the few?

      In Illinois the legislature is not at as much risk as the gubernatorial candidates so we might be ok-ish, but idk.

      12 votes
      1. bkimmel
        Link Parent
        Regarding the "midterm backlash" - that typically happens to the president's party, but I'm less certain of that happening this time. The DOGE policies they are pursuing will be absolutely...

        Regarding the "midterm backlash" - that typically happens to the president's party, but I'm less certain of that happening this time. The DOGE policies they are pursuing will be absolutely terrible for trying to live safely in the U.S. over the longer term (say 8 - 10 years) but over the short/medium term they could unlock a wave of "real economy" hypergrowth that reinforces the reason a lot of voters turned out for them. If course, the tariffs could lead to a complete economic collapse so :shrug .

        7 votes
    2. [10]
      GenuinelyCrooked
      Link Parent
      There are a lot of people living in red states. Over 22 million in Florida. I think a list like this could be helpful to my trans friends there, and I'm glad it was shared.

      There are a lot of people living in red states. Over 22 million in Florida. I think a list like this could be helpful to my trans friends there, and I'm glad it was shared.

      11 votes
      1. [6]
        psi
        Link Parent
        Moving abroad is infinitely more challenging than moving across state lines, though. If someone doesn't have the means or skills or whatnot to move from a red state to a blue state, then there is...

        Moving abroad is infinitely more challenging than moving across state lines, though. If someone doesn't have the means or skills or whatnot to move from a red state to a blue state, then there is virtually no chance that they'll be able to move to Europe.

        Edit: But yes, a list like the author's would be useful for determining if one should move from a red state to a safer one.

        9 votes
        1. [5]
          GenuinelyCrooked
          (edited )
          Link Parent
          That depends on a lot of things. If we hadn't brought our cats it would have actually been cheaper for us to move to Sweden than to move to say, California or New York. The rent here is so much...

          That depends on a lot of things. If we hadn't brought our cats it would have actually been cheaper for us to move to Sweden than to move to say, California or New York. The rent here is so much cheaper, it makes a huge difference. Getting the visa is that hardest part though, obviously, Ave that's not a problem for moving between states.

          I also don't really like when people dismiss other people's concerns by pointing out the some members of that group are probably safe even though others clearly aren't.

          Edit: if anyone knows any trans VFX artists who are interested in leaving the states, I might know someone that can make it a lot easier for them.

          6 votes
          1. [3]
            psi
            Link Parent
            I mean, yes, that's my point. If someone is trans but lacks specific highly-demanded skills, they're going to struggle to obtain a visa. It's rather myopic to assume that all LGBT folk living in...

            Getting the visa is that hardest part though, obviously, Ave that's not a problem for moving between states.

            I mean, yes, that's my point. If someone is trans but lacks specific highly-demanded skills, they're going to struggle to obtain a visa. It's rather myopic to assume that all LGBT folk living in red states will have the means or capability to immigrate abroad; their first priority should be moving anywhere else (if immigration is an option, all the better).

            10 votes
            1. [2]
              GenuinelyCrooked
              Link Parent
              I certainly wasn't saying that, and I don't think anyone was. All I was saying with my initial comment was that there are plenty of trans people who need to consider when and if they will leave...

              It's rather myopic to assume that all LGBT folk living in red states will have the means or capability to immigrate abroad

              I certainly wasn't saying that, and I don't think anyone was. All I was saying with my initial comment was that there are plenty of trans people who need to consider when and if they will leave the place where they are, which the comment I was responding to downplayed by only referring to trans people in blue states. With my follow-up comment I was just saying that what will work for people is not one-size-fits-all. You're arguing against a point that no one was making.

              5 votes
              1. psi
                Link Parent
                The article specifically refers to moving to another country, so I thought you were advocating for people in Florida immigrating abroad. Apologies for the misunderstanding.

                The article specifically refers to moving to another country, so I thought you were advocating for people in Florida immigrating abroad. Apologies for the misunderstanding.

                6 votes
          2. Minori
            Link Parent
            Bumfuck nowhere Illinois is plenty cheap to live in (though jobs are more scarce). There are plenty of cheaper options in blue states outside of the core major metros (and the entire state of...

            The rent here is so much cheaper, it makes a huge difference.

            Bumfuck nowhere Illinois is plenty cheap to live in (though jobs are more scarce). There are plenty of cheaper options in blue states outside of the core major metros (and the entire state of California).

            1 vote
      2. [3]
        Minori
        (edited )
        Link Parent
        And I completely understand that as someone that fled the first state in the country to issue a non-binary ID all the way back in 2010. Things have sadly changed for the worse in many states. I...

        And I completely understand that as someone that fled the first state in the country to issue a non-binary ID all the way back in 2010. Things have sadly changed for the worse in many states.

        I don't know whether other countries are much better. The US is the wealthiest country in the world by a good margin, and there's something to be said for the insulating power of cold, hard cash.

        4 votes
        1. [2]
          GenuinelyCrooked
          Link Parent
          That cash is only insulating if the people in danger have a good amount of it, which isn't likely to be true for trans people, statistically. I think much of central and northern Europe are...

          That cash is only insulating if the people in danger have a good amount of it, which isn't likely to be true for trans people, statistically.

          I think much of central and northern Europe are better, as hard as it can be to get there from the US.

          5 votes
          1. Minori
            Link Parent
            Statistically speaking, most poor trans people will have better chances at moving to a blue state and breaking into a higher-income profession than emigrating to highly sought after European...

            Statistically speaking, most poor trans people will have better chances at moving to a blue state and breaking into a higher-income profession than emigrating to highly sought after European countries. I'm sure it's a good plan for some people that can easily afford a plane ticket, but it's extremely difficult to emigrate if you're poor.

            1 vote
  2. [8]
    largepanda
    Link
    I strongly suspect I won't be able to leave the west coast blue states I live in. I already can't visit my parents in Ohio anymore and the new administration hasn't even started yet. I've already...

    I strongly suspect I won't be able to leave the west coast blue states I live in. I already can't visit my parents in Ohio anymore and the new administration hasn't even started yet.

    I've already reduced the dosage on my hormones while still getting my existing prescription filled to build up a longer buffer in the event they become unobtainable through normal pharmacies. I don't want to do this, and it's going to potentially fuck with my... everything, but a lower dose is far less problematic than no dose.

    I don't want to have to flee the US, I don't want to be constantly demonized, I just want to live my life.


    As an aside, I've been working on getting citizenship by descent to an EU state. It's going to cost me close to $2k in documents, legal fees, and overnight document shipping; but it's some of the best money I could possibly be spending right now. That's not available for most people, but if you know anything about your ancestry it's worth looking into.

    Be warned: some countries' timelines on application processing are so slow that, if you started right now, you'd be lucky to get your passport before 2028, but it's still an option.

    10 votes
    1. [7]
      Minori
      (edited )
      Link Parent
      The (maybe unethical) trick is to ask your doctor for a larger dose and to take a smaller dose than is written on the prescription. This will easily let you build up a multi-month supply. Worse...

      I've already reduced the dosage on my hormones while still getting my existing prescription filled to build up a longer buffer in the event they become unobtainable through normal pharmacies.

      The (maybe unethical) trick is to ask your doctor for a larger dose and to take a smaller dose than is written on the prescription. This will easily let you build up a multi-month supply. Worse comes to worst, everything but T is shockingly easy to import via gray markets.

      10 votes
      1. [6]
        largepanda
        Link Parent
        I'm already on the max dose my doctor will prescribe. Am also aware of the grey market options, they're known and remembered in case they're needed.

        I'm already on the max dose my doctor will prescribe. Am also aware of the grey market options, they're known and remembered in case they're needed.

        5 votes
        1. [5]
          Minori
          Link Parent
          Assuming you're not taking an injection currently, those are a bit easier to stockpile if you're willing to deal with the hassle (and require less frequent doses of roughly once a week). Though...

          Assuming you're not taking an injection currently, those are a bit easier to stockpile if you're willing to deal with the hassle (and require less frequent doses of roughly once a week). Though they may not be worth the hassle if you're happy with your current dose.

          4 votes
          1. [4]
            DefinitelyNotAFae
            Link Parent
            The other classic is pairing up with someone else trans and swap hormones. Trans men get HBC and trans women get T and trade. New generations are rediscovering old strategies.

            The other classic is pairing up with someone else trans and swap hormones. Trans men get HBC and trans women get T and trade.

            New generations are rediscovering old strategies.

            6 votes
            1. [3]
              Minori
              Link Parent
              I feel like a doctor would eventually get suspicious with how strong drugs like testosterone are but maybe I'm wrong?

              I feel like a doctor would eventually get suspicious with how strong drugs like testosterone are but maybe I'm wrong?

              1. [2]
                DefinitelyNotAFae
                Link Parent
                It's how some trans folks managed for quite a while, sympathetic doctors don't have to know what they don't want to.

                It's how some trans folks managed for quite a while, sympathetic doctors don't have to know what they don't want to.

                2 votes
                1. Minori
                  Link Parent
                  Ah, the doctor being in on it is the part I was missing!

                  Ah, the doctor being in on it is the part I was missing!

  3. Notcoffeetable
    Link
    This is a good exercise, and I'd encourage any rights-oriented person to have a similar discussion with their partner. But (and I feel this is where gen pop gets lost) this kind of rhetoric is...

    This is a good exercise, and I'd encourage any rights-oriented person to have a similar discussion with their partner.

    But (and I feel this is where gen pop gets lost) this kind of rhetoric is divisive:

    Meanwhile, my partner was also struggling to explain to her company— to her cisgender, straight leadership— under which conditions we would be forced to evacuate. Corporations like predictability; are you leaving, or aren’t you? None of this if stuff. Either it’s bad enough for you to get on an emergency flight right now, or you’re overreacting and we don’t want to hear about it ever again.

    I'm a cis-gender, straight person who holds the director title, definitely "boss" to some. This conversation can't be had just off-the-cuff. Sure if a team member pulled me into a room to talk about this I'd engage where they are. I like to think of myself as an ally and the people in my life seem to affirm that identification. But I would not have that conversation right now with my boss. With my boss "head of" or "chief mucky muck" it must be urgent enough that I would also be requesting relocation over-seas at the same time.

    So what I mean is, anyone outside of my identify (cis-white straight male) has very good reason to be concerned. But if you are going to your boss and they aren't solidly "ally", they need to have some actionability; a "heads up" is just going to spook them.

    10 votes
  4. boxer_dogs_dance
    Link
    I hate that this is a realistic concern. Thanks for posting. It's useful.

    I hate that this is a realistic concern.

    Thanks for posting. It's useful.

    5 votes
  5. [6]
    SteeeveTheSteve
    Link
    This is the USA, what is true of one state is not true of another and the Feds have little they can do to change what a state really wants. The state oversees the people, the feds oversee the...

    This is the USA, what is true of one state is not true of another and the Feds have little they can do to change what a state really wants. The state oversees the people, the feds oversee the states. So go to a state that has the money to replace medicaid if need be and that will fight back against the Feds. There is far worse out there than Florida, I would hope anyone leaving the USA is extremely careful of where they go.

    Here's an article with a maps that illustrates the differences between states:
    https://www.erininthemorning.com/p/post-election-2024-anti-trans-risk

    Something similar for Canada: https://celeste.lgbt/en/anti-trans-risk-map/
    Europe: https://rainbowmap.ilga-europe.org/

    5 votes
    1. [5]
      DefinitelyNotAFae
      Link Parent
      Can any state replace Medicaid funding entirely? While not losing reelection or being recalled immediately? They have a lot of levers, and even when they shouldn't they'll try, my state lost a...

      Can any state replace Medicaid funding entirely? While not losing reelection or being recalled immediately? They have a lot of levers, and even when they shouldn't they'll try, my state lost a bunch of COVID vaccines when Trump decided to take them. Technically legal due to the pandemic but still. There are only so many court cases an AG can push

      5 votes
      1. [2]
        Minori
        Link Parent
        Maybe. It's nontrivial and would require massively cutting other programs. In general, states would have to double or triple their Medicaid spending to completely replace lost federal funds....

        Can any state replace Medicaid funding entirely? While not losing reelection or being recalled immediately?

        Maybe. It's nontrivial and would require massively cutting other programs. In general, states would have to double or triple their Medicaid spending to completely replace lost federal funds. That's generally doable for wealthier states like California though I can't imagine tax payers would be happy about it. This would make about 60-90% of most state budgets Medicaid funding (reference).

        More realistically, I think we'd see Medicaid coverage, in some US states, shrink to only needy children and the like.

        1. DefinitelyNotAFae
          (edited )
          Link Parent
          It was framed rhetorically, sorry, I'm not sure any state can do it without its elected officials facing a recall or being ousted due to the cost. I don't think it's likely.

          It was framed rhetorically, sorry, I'm not sure any state can do it without its elected officials facing a recall or being ousted due to the cost. I don't think it's likely.

          1 vote
      2. [2]
        SteeeveTheSteve
        Link Parent
        Oh, sorry, didn't mean replace it for everyone that would be nuts. They only need to provide state funding for what is not covered by the feds. The feds can't tell them what to do with state...

        Oh, sorry, didn't mean replace it for everyone that would be nuts. They only need to provide state funding for what is not covered by the feds. The feds can't tell them what to do with state money, so they'll keep getting federal funds.

        1. DefinitelyNotAFae
          (edited )
          Link Parent
          No, but more than doubling their spend on Medicaid is huge, and not likely to result in the people in office remaining in office. And the feds could make receiving funding contingent on not...

          No, but more than doubling their spend on Medicaid is huge, and not likely to result in the people in office remaining in office.

          And the feds could make receiving funding contingent on not offering those now "banned" services

          1 vote
  6. DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link
    Another resource https://www.pinkhaven.org/ They exist in various spaces - local groups to facilitate travel, temporary places to stay, advocacy groups, etc.

    Another resource
    https://www.pinkhaven.org/

    They exist in various spaces - local groups to facilitate travel, temporary places to stay, advocacy groups, etc.

    3 votes