18 votes

What are your thoughts on Pride Month?

Some questions to consider:

  • How do you feel about it as a whole?
  • What is your experience with it like? Do you go out, celebrate, march, get involved? Does it connect you to others or affirm your identity?
  • What positives does it bring to the table?
  • What critiques do you have of it?

This last one can be treated as hypothetical but might apply to some real experiences as well--either are valid:

  • If you chose to march in a parade to bring awareness to an issue, what cause would you represent? How would you show it, or what would your sign say? Who would you want there alongside you?

16 comments

  1. emdash Link
    I'd say, as someone who has recently gone through a breakup as part of a same-sex relationship and is currently feeling pretty hurt, unwanted, and alone; that even things like Pride Month help me...

    I'd say, as someone who has recently gone through a breakup as part of a same-sex relationship and is currently feeling pretty hurt, unwanted, and alone; that even things like Pride Month help me at least feel like there's support for people like us out there.

    It's also probably a great place to meet new people. I don't know why anyone would want to take that away from anyone else.

    13 votes
  2. rain1 Link
    I thought it was just one day i don't know how or when it became a whole month. I don't really have time to celebrate (or whatever?) for a whole month. I am not enjoying large corporations...

    I thought it was just one day i don't know how or when it became a whole month. I don't really have time to celebrate (or whatever?) for a whole month. I am not enjoying large corporations pretending to care about us on social media. Something very creepy about that new phenomenon.

    11 votes
  3. [10]
    NecrophiliaChocolate Link
    Please note: I am not gay or anything, but that doesn't mean I am out to offend you or your choices, you do you, whether you are a person or a company. I absolutely dont care for pride months or...

    Please note: I am not gay or anything, but that doesn't mean I am out to offend you or your choices, you do you, whether you are a person or a company.

    I absolutely dont care for pride months or any month/week/day of any group. I personally past these things because it suggests a lack of normalization. Like, the fact that we have to have something like this means we haven't truly accepted it. So I'm not saying get rid of it because its an eyesore or anything, I want to get rid of it because it shoudn't be a big deal. Its the same way I feel about those first female/asian american/ black/ etc. to do x.

    7 votes
    1. [3]
      Death Link Parent
      There are people in the LGBT community right now, including organizers, who share a similar sentiment. They also believe it shouldn't be necessary to put in the effort to normalize what is not and...

      There are people in the LGBT community right now, including organizers, who share a similar sentiment. They also believe it shouldn't be necessary to put in the effort to normalize what is not and has never been justifiably demonized. But the sentiment is that Pride will therefore phase out of it's own accord when LGBT people no longer feel compelled to celebrate themselves because there is never a doubt that the opposite would be true.

      Pride in it's current form is still a very necessary, and even somewhat risky, undertaking for the LGBT community. Because, as you say, it's stated goal is far from reached. But the way to reaching this isn't by telling ourselves it shouldn't be necessary. Because that does nothing to address the fundamental issues it seeks to solve.

      Aside from the fact that violence against LGBT people continues apace in developed countries, there is still widespread indirect discrimination which LGBT people have to live with every single day. Never mind that companies are attempting to mine it for profit or that the public sphere has by and large sanitized or done away with LGBT-negative rhetoric (the extent to which is questionable) people still dread walking alone at night with their same-sex spouse, even during Pride.

      And I want to note on a personal level here that I do not, in any way, identify as LGBT. I am very much the model of the average white man, but I too care about peace in our time, a true peace not a "Negative Peace" described by MLK as "the absence of tension". And the way I see things embracing, celebrating, or at least encouraging Pride is how we will reach that all-important peace and acceptance. Because when all straight people can laugh and celebrate together with the LGBT community, when the fear and hatred is gone, so too will Pride's status as a social movement likely wane.

      In this way I feel like the sentiment of "it shouldn't be a big deal" is actually a self-defeating one.

      17 votes
      1. [2]
        NecrophiliaChocolate Link Parent
        I think youre exactly right. This is clearly me not explaining myself properly. I understand the current need for it, but I want the world to be in a situation where there isn't a need for it....

        I think youre exactly right. This is clearly me not explaining myself properly. I understand the current need for it, but I want the world to be in a situation where there isn't a need for it. Rereading what I wrote, I can understand why what I said was not clear.

        5 votes
        1. Death Link Parent
          I think perhaps what you should consider is whether or not a passive wish for a better world does not engender resentment and disappointment when reality inevitable fails to live up to it. And...

          I think perhaps what you should consider is whether or not a passive wish for a better world does not engender resentment and disappointment when reality inevitable fails to live up to it. And whether or not it is more productive to embrace what we can do, in this moment, to bring us closer to such a world.

          Obviously I can't make you do anything, you are the master of your own life, but I want to extend this advice since it's what helped me go from a cynical and somewhat ignorant Pride sceptic to a more informed and positive Pride supporter.

          7 votes
    2. [5]
      Algernon_Asimov Link Parent
      Chinese-heritage settlers in Australia have been normalised for decades, since the first Chinese arrived here during the 1850s gold rush. They still have a special Chinese festival every year at...

      Chinese-heritage settlers in Australia have been normalised for decades, since the first Chinese arrived here during the 1850s gold rush. They still have a special Chinese festival every year at the change of the lunar new year.

      Indians living in the United Kingdom have been normalised for ages, since the British ruled India over a century ago. They still have special Indian festivals throughout the year.

      Even if LGBT people were normalised (we're not, but let's pretend for the sake of argument that we are), we should still be entitled to hold our own festivals to celebrate our history and our heritage.

      Or should we cancel all minority festivals entirely?

      10 votes
      1. [4]
        NecrophiliaChocolate Link Parent
        Thats not what I mean. These festivals you are mentioning are not celebrating they are indian or chinese. They are celebrating an occasion. If you are solely talking about celebrating what you are...

        Thats not what I mean. These festivals you are mentioning are not celebrating they are indian or chinese. They are celebrating an occasion. If you are solely talking about celebrating what you are Indian/Chinese/Gay/Straight/etc. yes I think we need to be at a point where we don't have to celebrate what they are. If you are talking about celebrating your history or a heritage, then that is completely fine, everyone should be able to do that, doesn't matter if you are a minority or not. There is a distinct difference between the two, in my eyes at least.

        All I am trying to say is we should be at a point where we dont have to celebrate or emphasize someones gender/color/sexual orientation, it should not be a big deal.

        1 vote
        1. tindall Link Parent
          Pride is held during this month in celebration of the Stonewall Riots, which, 50 years ago this month, were the inciting events and/or turning points in a chain of activism, legal victories, and...

          These festivals you are mentioning are not celebrating they are indian or chinese. They are celebrating an occasion.

          Pride is held during this month in celebration of the Stonewall Riots, which, 50 years ago this month, were the inciting events and/or turning points in a chain of activism, legal victories, and social change which are in the process of leading to the world where, as you say, Pride will no longer be necessary.

          To go the same route with America, Independence Day is as much a celebration of American national identity as it is a celebration of the event of the signing of the Declaration of Independence. Many nations have similar events; for example, 5 November/Guy Fawkes Day is as much a celebration of the long-stretching heritage of the British monarchy as it is of the specific event (the foiling of an attempt to destroy Parliment and institute a theocracy).

          There's nothing particularly different about Pride; it uses the anniversary of an event as a nucleus around which to organize a celebration of an aspect of identity. The only real difference is that it's not a national identity.

          9 votes
        2. Algernon_Asimov Link Parent
          What's the difference between "celebrating what you are Indian/Chinese/Gay/Straight/etc" and "celebrating a heritage"? If I'm celebrating my gay heritage, am I not also indirectly celebrating my...

          What's the difference between "celebrating what you are Indian/Chinese/Gay/Straight/etc" and "celebrating a heritage"? If I'm celebrating my gay heritage, am I not also indirectly celebrating my gay identity?

          I think you're trying to say that we shouldn't need Pride because it's supposedly a protest by a minority group and, in a perfect world, minorities should be so accepted that they don't need to protest. That's a valid point. But we LGBT folk are not going to stop dancing in the street even when we are accepted. We're still going to gather together to be ourselves among people like us, even when everyone accepts us and even when we're "normalised".

          7 votes
        3. alyaza Link Parent
          counterpoint: we're not at that point. it's still illegal to be LGBT in most of the world, and even where it is legal for certain or all LGBT identities to exist, in many places they still suffer...

          All I am trying to say is we should be at a point where we dont have to celebrate or emphasize someones gender/color/sexual orientation, it should not be a big deal.

          counterpoint: we're not at that point. it's still illegal to be LGBT in most of the world, and even where it is legal for certain or all LGBT identities to exist, in many places they still suffer from significant discrimination. in a lot of america for example you can still be fired for your sexuality or for being trans.

          6 votes
    3. kfwyre Link Parent
      I definitely get where you're coming from, and I don't think it's an uncommon sentiment. As we make social progress, being queer will be less noteworthy and more accepted, to the point that our...

      I definitely get where you're coming from, and I don't think it's an uncommon sentiment. As we make social progress, being queer will be less noteworthy and more accepted, to the point that our lives and experiences will be considered part of normal human experience rather than some separate subcategory.

      I like this forward thinking, but one of the more important parts of Pride celebrations for me is also looking back. I am able to be who I am and live the life that I live because of the many that came before me. They laid difficult groundwork and made incredible sacrifices that so many of them didn't live to see the fruits of.

      Even though traditional Pride celebrations aren't really my scene, I still look at them fondly and see them as an escalating echo from our history. In this way, I don't want them to fade out. I feel like we owe it to our predecessors to respect and pursue the opportunities they passed on to us.

      5 votes
  4. NaraVara Link
    I've lived on or near the parade route for my city's Pride parade for a little over a decade now. I've gone from thinking it was fun and cool to being annoyed by tourists and revelers cluttering...

    I've lived on or near the parade route for my city's Pride parade for a little over a decade now. I've gone from thinking it was fun and cool to being annoyed by tourists and revelers cluttering up my street for weeks on end. It's a story as old as gentrification really.

    It is always fun when I do bother to go and actually celebrate, but that's been less and less now. I think most of my gay friends have kind of settled down and they tend to do these things with their other gay friends instead of inviting me along. And I'm settled down too and care less about going to see stuff I've already seen before.

    I will say, though, that it has evolved a lot and in a direction I find rather boring. There is a valid concern around wanting to depict LGBT people as just normal folks and not wanting to pigeonhole everyone into a stereotype. But the sad fact is. . . normal people make for boring parades! I don't care about the Metro Police department, the Mayor's office, and my local bank being down with Pride.

    Yes yes, it's a nice "Look how far things have come" story, but does anyone honestly want to see a parade float full of bank tellers? Even the crowd is all family friendly now. Bring on more Queens and Leather Daddies I say! It always bothered me a bit when there was on overtone of "We should love and respect our gay brothers and sisters because they're really just like us if you think about it." Nah, whether they're like us or not people deserve respect and love because they're human. Forcing us to sit with our discomfort of men smooching each other until we got used to it is how Pride got us this far in the first place. We have the Queens to thank for that.

    6 votes
  5. Death Link
    It's a party, and like all parties you can either enjoy it or choose to stay home. Both are perfectly valid. Personally I went this year and I really liked it, it's also just good to see people be...

    How do you feel about it as a whole?

    It's a party, and like all parties you can either enjoy it or choose to stay home. Both are perfectly valid. Personally I went this year and I really liked it, it's also just good to see people be so genuinely happy to celebrate who they are and what they love about themselves. Something a lot of us I feel could do with.

    What is your experience with it like? Do you go out, celebrate, march, get involved? Does it connect you to others or affirm your identity?

    I like watching it, maybe sharing a drink with friends while doing so. It does absolutely nothing for my identity and/or affirmation but I don't feel it needs to. There's reminders all around me that being a heterosexual man is by and large okay.

    What positives does it bring to the table?

    It gives people who live with an almost permanent sense of doubt and fear of being rejected, discriminated, or even killed, an occasion to be themselves without fear and to see others who feel the same in broad daylight. It helps young people who feel estranged from their peers feel like there's hope, like they're not alone, and like there's a place for them in the world too.

    Also drinks sometimes go for cheaper which is neat.

    What critiques do you have of it?

    I'm amongst the people who don't necessarily enjoy the corporatized aspect of it. I respect LGBT groups who wish to represent themselves in a certain type of field (doctors, teachers, construction workers) but I don't think you need to put the name of your company on it. Google doesn't actually have a monopoly on tech work so why not make in the "LGBT in tech" group instead of "Gayglers"?

    3 votes
  6. Octofox Link
    I have no strong feelings about it. I guess for other people it may make them feel better but I just don't really have any interest in it. I attended the protests in Australia while the marriage...

    I have no strong feelings about it. I guess for other people it may make them feel better but I just don't really have any interest in it. I attended the protests in Australia while the marriage vote was on because I felt that was very important but now I think things are pretty ok here. At least in the city areas anyway.

    1 vote
  7. jprich Link
    I was all ready to head into DC with my cousin to celebrate her ( im straight ) but then my job had to do emergency maintenance so I had to baby sit contractors. =( I guess it will be next year.

    I was all ready to head into DC with my cousin to celebrate her ( im straight ) but then my job had to do emergency maintenance so I had to baby sit contractors. =(

    I guess it will be next year.

    1 vote