47 votes

Thinking about quitting the Internet

This is an off-the-cuff, stream-of-consciousness post, so IDK how much sense it'll make.

This idea of quitting the Internet is not new for me, but it's also never been a serious, "consider-the-pros-v-cons" plan, either. Just a kind of knee-jerk reaction to seeing things online that remind me (more and more often, these days) that the 'Net is not what I hoped-and-wanted it to be, and it is becoming less like it, daily.

But in recent months, for me, I find myself thinking about it more, more often, and more seriously.

For a bit of context, I am a software developer (I guess), 20+ years in the field, more back-end than front-end, but quite a lot of web development, too. And I've been burned out in my field for the last several years, working occasionally, but mostly just living off of savings ... watching them dwindle, while I try to figure out what else to do with my life.

I also think there is some kind of burgeoning groundswell towards some similar ideas ... many people becoming more and more disgusted with what corporations and governments have done and are doing to it, trying to find some way to walk away from it w/o completely severing themselves from the modern world. The latest generation of AI and the new magic word, "enshittification" are certainly making more people realize that the 'Net is not headed in a good direction.

I could so easily go into a long-winded rant about "this isn't the Internet we were promised", and yada ... but whatever. It is what it is, and many people are happy with it, and many, many more are just quietly resigned to it being a necessary part of life.

For many, many years, I have explored online alternatives, the dark web, assorted distributed-network ideals like Hyperborea and IPFS. I keep seeing potentials, but nothing that ever coalesces.

Again, just stream-of-consciousness here ... anyone else ever find themselves seriously considering this, or something similarly drastic?

17 comments

  1. paris
    Link
    My partner and I discuss it frequently, and the one thing we've both decided on is leaving large-scale SNS (social networking services). We used to both be on Instagram, Facebook, etc, but now...
    • Exemplary

    My partner and I discuss it frequently, and the one thing we've both decided on is leaving large-scale SNS (social networking services). We used to both be on Instagram, Facebook, etc, but now they're completely off any SNS and I'm only on a very small professional mastodon server.

    Even services—Netflix, Spotify, so on—have been supplanted by other means of aquisition, mostly involving sailing and parrots. The idea that so much in our lives had been suggested by algorithms designed to capture attention to that which is most beneficial to the holder of the algorithm and not necessarily ourselves, was a huge push towards that. We still have a few Youtube channels we're subscribed to, but they're exactly the sort of educational, no-frills lectures that we could also find available via a college's public access.

    The thing is, when "the internet" takes up a good chunk of one's time, we found we needed to supplant that time with other things. We've been reading, a lot, sometimes together, which is nice because then there's always fascinating conversation to come along with. We go out more, not to do things but just to walk around and see what the city has to offer. We've been going to museums, theater, even local coffee shops, things that instill in both of us a sense of the culture of the world we live in, without the 2-second attention grab of WOWEEE BRIGHT COLORS that so much on the internet has become. We have one cell phone now that has service, which is the one we use when we go out if we need directions or to check hours or such. We both independently decided on setting up a specific time each day to respond to emails and messages. Unfortunately, our work is online, so we do need to stay connected for that: however, in the dearth of so many other "notifications! ads! hey check this out!", even work messages have become less of a stressor!

    Unfortunately, as @douchebag said, it's not really possible to quit the internet, and I do think that any sort of "I'm going to go completely offline and live in a yurt!" is reactionary, apocalyptic thinking that serves no one best. The answer is not to do a complete 180 and run screaming in the other direction. The answer is, as with many things, moderation and metered, rational response.

    You're right in that this isn't the internet that was promised, and you're also right that it is what it is. But at least for me, I've approached my use of the modern internet in much the same way I approach any relationship in my life. Is this [person / way of interacting with the internet] benefitting me? Do I feel enriched by these experiences? Do I want more of this? And I have realized that I was becoming a worse, more negative, more anxious person because of it. When the internet is used as a tool to satisfy a need of information, I think it's fine, but we have to be careful to make sure that's all we're doing. Doomscrolling isn't the only issue; incessant scrolling at all is itself a sign that something's wrong.

    32 votes
  2. [4]
    Fiachra
    Link
    I think the modern Internet got the way it did through a 'frog in a pot' process, and once the pot is at a full boil nobody will want to hop in anymore. That's when we'll see culture adopt better...

    I think the modern Internet got the way it did through a 'frog in a pot' process, and once the pot is at a full boil nobody will want to hop in anymore. That's when we'll see culture adopt better ways of interacting with the Internet imo.

    I recommend the book 'digital minimalism' by Cal Newport for what that might look like, it advocates for limited use of the Internet but only when it serves a good purpose and only when the Internet is the best way to fulfill that purpose. It's an approach to shifting screen use away from being compulsive and toward being intentional.

    19 votes
    1. supergauntlet
      (edited )
      Link Parent
      I would argue this is already happening. I know a lot of people my age or a bit younger that are very proudly not on any social media, or are very very very selective with their media consumption....

      I would argue this is already happening. I know a lot of people my age or a bit younger that are very proudly not on any social media, or are very very very selective with their media consumption.

      That's why I've been saying these companies are playing with fire. If they make things bad enough, people are just going to stop using their website. And then they will see how much better their lives are without it, and they won't go back.

      EDIT: also, I'll say that quitting the Internet is just not feasible. however, quitting algorithmic social media is. You should do that. Cut clout chasers out of your life, social media rots people's brains.

      9 votes
    2. spinoza-the-jedi
      Link Parent
      You know, I just happened to be looking for my next book and this looks like a pretty good read. I'm going to pick it up at my local bookstore later this week. Thank you for the recommendation!

      You know, I just happened to be looking for my next book and this looks like a pretty good read. I'm going to pick it up at my local bookstore later this week. Thank you for the recommendation!

      5 votes
    3. Eric_the_Cerise
      Link Parent
      Slow responses on my part, in this thread I started ... apologies for that. I am looking into this book, and I just noticed he's the same guy that wrote Deep Work. I may have to start paying...

      Slow responses on my part, in this thread I started ... apologies for that.

      I am looking into this book, and I just noticed he's the same guy that wrote Deep Work. I may have to start paying attention to this author. Thanks for the tip.

      3 votes
  3. MimicSquid
    Link
    I haven't, but my mother did. She'd had a career doing business things, and after a couple of significant life events decided to move to a cabin in the woods with Internet only available at an...

    I haven't, but my mother did. She'd had a career doing business things, and after a couple of significant life events decided to move to a cabin in the woods with Internet only available at an office she maintained in a near-ish rural town. She worked remotely, and spent most of her time puttering around her cabin keeping it running and hosting other people who wanted to get away from things for a while. It wasn't a complete detachment from the Internet, but she cut it down to exactly what was needed for her job and to set up times to see people in person and nothing else.

    It worked for her for 5 years, until her health took a turn for the worse and she wanted to be closer than a two-hour drive from the nearest hospital.

    It worked for her, and was a very inexpensive way to live.

    17 votes
  4. spinoza-the-jedi
    Link
    To answer your question directly: yes, I've thought about "quitting the internet". I've worked in tech for about 10 years now, so I can also relate somewhat. But as @douchebag said, that's likely...

    To answer your question directly: yes, I've thought about "quitting the internet". I've worked in tech for about 10 years now, so I can also relate somewhat. But as @douchebag said, that's likely impossible in modern life at this point. There was once a great deal of hope and idealism about the net. It was supposed to be a way for people all over the world to communicate, to encourage new ways of sharing information, etc. Social media was supposed to be an extension of all this. In hindsight, perhaps it's not surprising that corporations and "big money" came in to ruin all of that.

    I've found ways to be happier again, though. My answer is to reduce and scale back, focus on privacy more than convenience where reasonable, and consciously remove technology (especially network-connected) from certain aspects of my life. I don't think you can quit the internet, even though I'd like to. But I got rid of all social media, aside from Hacker News and Tildes, and I only access them from a computer. I use an RSS reader for news, though I've experimented with Ground News a bit (most think you have to install a mobile app, but that's not true). I removed extraneous and what I'd consider unnecessary tech from my life - I don't have a smart watch, I don't have a fancy smart phone, I avoid smart home devices, etc.

    I know there's always articles claiming the end of remote work is near, but I've been working remotely without issue since 2020. Maybe I miss out on some amazing career opportunities on the west coast, but I don't care because I moved to a small rural town where it's quiet and where it's easier to "touch grass". Hell, I even call people and businesses now, rather than engage with some third-party app or their website.

    I could go on. I have a lot of passionate opinions about this topic and some adjacent ones (such as privacy). But suffice it to say, I don't think human beings were meant to live significant portions of their lives in what is now the internet and I think the old dream of "the net" started dying in the early 2010s. It can either be a tool or an addictive life consumer and I chose the former.

    9 votes
  5. DonQuixote
    Link
    I'll try to be subtle. Or maybe I won't. The crapification of society leaves pockets of value that no one wants. I pick them up off the street. Books, sometimes great ones. Music, The Best of the...

    I'll try to be subtle. Or maybe I won't. The crapification of society leaves pockets of value that no one wants. I pick them up off the street. Books, sometimes great ones. Music, The Best of the Best. And some of the best distillations of knowledge that people scoff at.

    There's this thing you might not have heard about it's called the public library . There are even a few pockets of the internet where value can be found. Like r/simple living on Reddit, and r/books. Like tildes. CDs, the kind you invest in have been great for me even as people on Wall Street Bets make and lose fortunes.

    One of the greatest treasures I've found is my little Progressive Methodist church, where genuine people try to help other people, and find themselves by losing themselves in the interests of a bigger cause. I admire people who go against the grain and find their way ignoring the Madding Crowd.

    So kudos to you for stepping out. You aren't alone.

    7 votes
  6. coatlol
    Link
    Maybe not as drastic as throwing all my computers in the lake or cracking open the TOR browser, but I ended up quitting a lot of social media platforms all at the same time and it felt very...

    Maybe not as drastic as throwing all my computers in the lake or cracking open the TOR browser, but I ended up quitting a lot of social media platforms all at the same time and it felt very freeing. The only social websites I still use are Tumblr, this site on occasion, and some forums. I also don't keep any of these apps/sites loaded on my phone and I've ended up reading a lot more. I told my friends I don't use tiktok and only have tumblr and much to my surprise, instead of telling me to download the app or that I have my own head up my ass, they shared that they've been wanting to use tiktok a lot less and that they'll just send me the link or a screenshot if they want me to see something. I find the internet is so much better when it's been filtered through your friends' eyes (and several ad blockers/privacy extensions).

    It did make me a lot happier at first, getting rid of all the junk, but misery has its own way of following me, so even under better circumstances I started feeling worse again. At least this time, when I've been feeling rotten, I no longer end up scrolling through the news until I find people that are being ripped limb from limb half a world away.

    If you think it will be an improvement in your life, do it. I don't regret that I've stopped using a lot of these sites and I don't think I ever will. You don't have to quit the whole thing and move to a cabin in the woods, but if you notice that using the internet doesn't make you feel well, then try to find ways to use it less or to use it differently. Don't be afraid to use the smaller sites, forums, or IRC if you really want to talk with new people without the bloat of the modern web.

    4 votes
  7. [2]
    guttersnipe
    Link
    I am off work this week and one of my plans is/was to "kill the internet", so to speak. My hopes was in creating some sort of "PTSD Safe" internet access and assumed there were tools out there...

    I am off work this week and one of my plans is/was to "kill the internet", so to speak. My hopes was in creating some sort of "PTSD Safe" internet access and assumed there were tools out there that would allow me to still access most of the internet but block stuff that causes my PTSD/anxiety/depression to spiral. My triggers are mainly tied to news sites but unfortunately the triggers are showing up on tech sites and the like more and more. I work in IT (and remotely) and thus can't just kill all access completely.

    I've had some domain blocks in place for all of Google, many news sites and advertising using NextDNS for a while now but it's just not enough. In my searching and trial and errors of everything I could find to implement I came up with a few solutions but none of them are great and all-encompassing. After spending days dealing with Docker containers, proxies, firewalls and the like I gave up in frustration. Using an aggressive local first-hop Adblock Home container, browser side content-blocking/trigger word replacement, NextDNS and a non-US VPN tunnel is where I have ended for now.

    In the end, I need to blacklist the whole of the internet and only whitelist what I actually need (banking, utilities, etc. I really don't need much of the internet; don't use socials nor stream). I also need to implement whatever with a break glass password I don't know but is someplace really inconvenient so I can't just turn things off on a whim to get around the blocks - like I did today.

    What I really want is a smart, network wide content-blocker that will rip anything to do with the triggers out completely against any connected device that works pretty much out of the box with a simple GUI and support. Only then do I think I can turn the internet back on fully but I don't foresee this happening.

    3 votes
    1. mayonuki
      Link Parent
      Would you mind explaining to me how you set up the break the glass password?

      Would you mind explaining to me how you set up the break the glass password?

      1 vote
  8. pete_the_paper_boat
    Link
    At this point, you could really argue Elon Musk was correct in stating that we're cyborgs with a crappy interface. I can't speak for newer generations, but the concept of the internet being an...

    At this point, you could really argue Elon Musk was correct in stating that we're cyborgs with a crappy interface.

    I can't speak for newer generations, but the concept of the internet being an extension of ourselves seems to be more prevalent than ever.

    2 votes
  9. Protected
    Link
    I'm in this exact situation. Are you thinking of quitting the internet entirely because of this? What are your ideas on how it could help? Or did you provide this context just so we can know that...

    I've been burned out in my field for the last several years, working occasionally, but mostly just living off of savings ... watching them dwindle, while I try to figure out what else to do with my life.

    I'm in this exact situation. Are you thinking of quitting the internet entirely because of this? What are your ideas on how it could help? Or did you provide this context just so we can know that it's no longer a requirement to you professionally?

    2 votes
  10. chizcurl
    (edited )
    Link
    I don't see why you have to quit the entire Internet unless it has never brought you joy or convenience. What apps or websites are you using that make you think the Internet is not what you hoped...

    I don't see why you have to quit the entire Internet unless it has never brought you joy or convenience. What apps or websites are you using that make you think the Internet is not what you hoped it would be, and why?

    2 votes
  11. Nemoder
    Link
    Why not just take frequent breaks from it? Maybe plan some trips to physically move away from where you normally use computers and smartphones. If you're not really into nature then go visit some...

    Why not just take frequent breaks from it? Maybe plan some trips to physically move away from where you normally use computers and smartphones. If you're not really into nature then go visit some cities you've never been to. Take a dumb phone for emergencies and find some interesting areas to explore.

    1 vote
  12. knocklessmonster
    Link
    There was a thought I had when I first read this post and forgot to leave. I saw it float up a bit so I'll shoot my shot. The internet we were promised is out there, and it even exists under Big...

    There was a thought I had when I first read this post and forgot to leave. I saw it float up a bit so I'll shoot my shot.

    The internet we were promised is out there, and it even exists under Big Tech. The biggest thing is a sense of community, whatever your involvement in a community, that makes things worth it.

    When most people say "I want to quit the Internet," they want off the hamster wheel of service consumption, especiallly social media in its many forms from Instagram to Reddit.

    I'm almost always online, but am also careful how I engage, typically avoiding the worst I find. I think Reddit is my "social network" mostly, since I only use Facebook for Messenger and LinkedIn to keep up professional appearances and check in on coworkers, and only engage in other online communities through Twitch stream chats. I haven't made the move back to the smaller internet of topic-specific boards or anything, but also feel that those weren't particularly good for me.

    A major thing I would recommend is to just disengage when you aren't enjoying yourself. Again, I'm almost always in front of my computer, but I do things other than the Internet if that makes sense.

    1 vote
  13. crdpa
    Link
    If you have instagram and wants to use less, I suggest getting the app from here (modded app that blocks stories, feed, everything) or access it via Firefox using the IGPlus extension.

    If you have instagram and wants to use less, I suggest getting the app from here (modded app that blocks stories, feed, everything) or access it via Firefox using the IGPlus extension.