A plush bathrobe and comfy slippers can go a long way. Taking time in the morning to drink coffee (or whatever) and just be still, instead of grabbing something to go as I rush out the door, is a...
A plush bathrobe and comfy slippers can go a long way.
Taking time in the morning to drink coffee (or whatever) and just be still, instead of grabbing something to go as I rush out the door, is a much better way to start the day for my mental health.
Where I live there is not a lot of natural light at this time of year, so I also recommend strategic use of sun lamps and sunrise simulators to combat depression.
I get my hair cut at a barbershop that includes a shampoo and scalp massage. It's a little thing but I always look forward to it. Hot towels are a similar barbershop/spa luxury I recommend.
Sounds like you've already tried more setups than I have, so I'm not sure how much I can offer. My need was to get out of bed, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, on mornings when the sun wasn't due for...
Sounds like you've already tried more setups than I have, so I'm not sure how much I can offer. My need was to get out of bed, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, on mornings when the sun wasn't due for another 4+ hours. I got a Philips sunrise lamp / alarm clock a few years ago and it helped a ton. Looking online now, they have a bunch of more sophisticated options that look pretty interesting these days. The one I have is fairly simple. It's a warm hue, which is nice.
Going to bed earlier helped with this too, as I just have more presence of mind and a better attitude for the day when I'm well rested. I also wake up to this song, which is the peaceful-est alarm sound I've come across. I just can't deal with being startled awake by klaxons or whatever.
For me personally it's dim, warm light that does the trick. Don't make it too dim though, you still need to light up the entire room. Avoid blue or greenish lights. Put a tune on the radio or on...
For me personally it's dim, warm light that does the trick. Don't make it too dim though, you still need to light up the entire room. Avoid blue or greenish lights. Put a tune on the radio or on headphones, have a drink(tea/water/juice) and just sit back and be offline for a bit.
To duffuse the light, get it shine onto the ceiling at multiple points while being not visible directly. Just a common omnidirectional light fixture is indeed like a bright spot of light.
To duffuse the light, get it shine onto the ceiling at multiple points while being not visible directly. Just a common omnidirectional light fixture is indeed like a bright spot of light.
Aim a bright light at the ceiling instead of down, it'll create a very well diffused light. I just point my 40W halogen desk lamp up instead of down and the ceiling and walls diffuse the light all...
Aim a bright light at the ceiling instead of down, it'll create a very well diffused light.
I just point my 40W halogen desk lamp up instead of down and the ceiling and walls diffuse the light all over the room.
Do you happen to have any Kindle or another display with e-ink? Try reading a book before bed, or doing about 15 minutes of light cleanup around the house. I know, and loathe the feeling of...
Do you happen to have any Kindle or another display with e-ink? Try reading a book before bed, or doing about 15 minutes of light cleanup around the house.
I know, and loathe the feeling of eyestrain - it's due to focusing your eyesight on an object at the same distance for a long period of time. There's no way around it except for short breaks - I remember there was a Chrome addon that prompted you to take 10min breaks every hour and stretch, maybe try that?
Sitting down with a fragrant cup of tea (usually tieguanyin or puerh or something with a strong smell) and instrumental music or vocals in a language I don't speak. Then just stare outside or into...
Sitting down with a fragrant cup of tea (usually tieguanyin or puerh or something with a strong smell) and instrumental music or vocals in a language I don't speak. Then just stare outside or into the room, or close my eyes. I think it's almost meditation, and it works.
You can also use LibreSprite, which is a fork of the last AsePrite version released under the GPL, instead of their current EULA. You'll still have to compile it yourself - I hoped they would have...
I've seen professional pixel artists produce their work exclusively in those three options, but most regular or professional pixel artists are going to have the best time with Aseprite, which is actually open source software, so you can compile it for free if you want (the Arch AUR also has packages available), but if you want a precompiled binary, you'll have to pay $14.99, though it is very worth it if you get in to hobby.
You can also use LibreSprite, which is a fork of the last AsePrite version released under the GPL, instead of their current EULA. You'll still have to compile it yourself - I hoped they would have added binary releases since I last saw it, but no such luck - but it's not too bad.
Though, binaries for AsePrite 1.1.6 (last version is 1.2.10-beta4) still exist in the Debian/Ubuntu repos.
I sometimes draw on Android, and I use dotpict there. Sadly, it's not FOSS, but I don't like (and struggle to use) any of the apps I can find on F-Droid (w. IzzyDroid repos).
I just looked into it and, while it's newer than the version of AsePrite that I used to play around with, it doesn't seem like they are even trying to maintain feature parity, let alone develop it...
I just looked into it and, while it's newer than the version of AsePrite that I used to play around with, it doesn't seem like they are even trying to maintain feature parity, let alone develop it further.
As someone dealing with a lot of anxiety, finding ways to relax is something I have spent a lot of time on. I tried various anxiolytics, but they made things far worse and had other......
As someone dealing with a lot of anxiety, finding ways to relax is something I have spent a lot of time on. I tried various anxiolytics, but they made things far worse and had other... unpleasant... side effects that my doctor was certain wouldn't happen. So I've turned to other methods. There are a lot of things people have already mentioned, but I'll embellish and add a few.
I didn't see anyone mention yoga. I have a daily yoga practice at a local studio. They also do meditation in addition to yoga, which I find to be crucial for calming my nerves. Yoga and meditation are the best, most reliable things I do for my anxiety. There are many other benefits (including things people don't tend to mention much like improved pulmonary function, but also the usual strength, balance, flexibility, body awareness, etc.) and I cannot recommend it enough. I wholeheartedly recommend practicing at a studio if you can, both because you build a community of friends and so you're less likely to get hurt. The style I practice is by far not the only style; it can be as gentle or as active as you want, as focused on stretching or strength as you like, etc. I could write an entire novella about this, but I'll stop here to get onto my other points. :) One thing I will say that anyone can do is pranayama, which is a fancy way of saying specific, controlled breathing exercises. I can go into more detail in another comment if anyone is interested; this one is going to be enormous as-is.
Tea is a universal thing, and I have so many different teas. I have literally dozens of different kinds of tea in my apartment. Usually I'll go for mint when I want a cozy, comforting, relaxed mood. I really enjoy this tea from Stash in that situation, as I find peppermint a bit too strong for that mood. Tastes differ, but I find I can enjoy that tea without any kind of sweetener. It's a lot better with some sugar, of course, and more soothing. A good chai always brightens my mood, too, particularly brewed strong and sweet, the traditional way (although I brew mine with water rather than milk for convenience).
Others have mentioned music. Relaxing music is something I have focused on curating for two decades. This is another thing that I could write a novella on, but I'll try to keep it succinct. I'll list artists here where anything they've done fits the mood, and specific albums when their content varies and you should focus on something. The genre you're looking for here is ambient, but depending upon how things are classified you will likely find some of these under electronic. Thom Brennan is fabulous for this kind of thing, and often I'll just listen to his whole discography. A lot of Max Corbacho's work is lovely, too. Ars Lucis and its "sequel" Horizon Matrix work particularly well. Brian Eno's Ambient One: Music for Airports is obligatory. Nils Frahm's Wintermusik, especially Ambre, is heartstoppingly beautiful. Steve Roach is another major name in this field, and has so many works that it's hard to suggest just one. The Quiet Music series (three numbered albums) is a great place to start. Dreamtime Return is really good, as are his collaborations with Robert Rich (particularly Strata), who we'll get back to in a moment. Anything from Jonn Serrie (especially And the Stars Go With You, Ixlandia, and Lumia Nights), Patrick O'Hearn (especially So Flows the Current, The So Flows Sessions, and Slow Time), and David Helpling (The Crossing, his collaboration with Jon Jenkins) work extremely well here. If I haven't bored you yet, you will recall that I mentioned Robert Rich and that we'd get back to him. If you're interested in longform (and I mean "longform": 6+ hours per album), his Somnium and Perpetual albums are absolute masterpieces in relaxation. Somnium was designed for his so-called sleep concerts, and is the most specifically "meant to help you fall asleep" recommendation in this long list. I haven't even gotten to my new obsessions, lofi and jazzhop. I'm still exploring there; give me a few years and I'll have some solid recommendations. I take my music seriously.
Another thing I haven't seen anyone mention is candles. I particularly enjoy scented candles, specifically those from Yankee Candle, as I've not found any others that produce a scent that I notice (the phrase used in the industry, which I'll use going forward, is "throwing" a scent). I live in a small apartment, so it doesn't take long for a candle to throw its scent throughout my entire place. It's so comforting and soothing to come back to a favorite scent after I've been out all day. Sure, burning candles--and leaving flames unattended--is in direct violation of my lease, but I don't leave them unattended if they're close to finishing. I can't make recommendations for scents because everyone is different, but I'm particularly fond of vanilla, pine / evergreen trees, and apples / spices. If you're buying from Yankee Candle, wait until they have a sale. Their products aren't cheap, but absolutely worth it IMO. Even if you don't want scented candles, turning off all of your electric lights and lighting a dozen votives can be just as nice. Candlelight has an organic, imperfect, soothing quality that electric lights never will.
A few folks have mentioned baths. I have grown to really enjoy bath bombs from Lush. They're environmentalist hippies and that makes me happy. Plus no animal testing! I'm particularly fond of Intergalactic, but definitely find what works for you. Draw a warm (not hot; you don't want to be sweating) bath, drop in the bath bomb, and breathe. I haven't combined proper meditation techniques with a bath bomb, yet, but I can't imagine it would be a bad time. Feel free to add music (like something listed above) as well, though with that much relaxation you should be wary not to fall asleep in the bath like I have! ;)
On the more sensual side of things, don't underestimate the value of good clothes. Don't hesitate to spoil yourself by running your clothes through the dryer for a little while before putting them on. Nothing wrong with spoiling yourself like that. The same goes for some good chocolate, either solid or liquid.
I'm sure I'll remember some other stuff, but this is absolutely enough for now.
It's a cliche but a nice cup of tea. It could be as simple as a good strong cup of builder's or the full-onness of whipping up a bowl of matcha. The process is relaxing as much as the drinking....
It's a cliche but a nice cup of tea. It could be as simple as a good strong cup of builder's or the full-onness of whipping up a bowl of matcha. The process is relaxing as much as the drinking.
Shaving. I used to use a straight razor but I don't so much any more, I usually use a double-edge razor instead. But there's a whole process, whipping up a lather, massaging it in, then the shave itself. You have to concentrate, but you don't have to think. It's a perfect way to engender flow and that's such a great way to relax.
BATH. I didn't get into baths until recently but damn. Get me some of that bubbly, lovely smelling stuff in there and put on the radio and that's so nice. Nobody can make you do anything when you're in the bath, all you can do is lie there and chill. Plus the hot water really helps my back untense so I end up in slightly less pain than usual afterwards.
Also cooking. I don't have to think when I cook and the bonus is that I get to eat at the end of it.
Not a really a suggestion, but FYI the Danish and Norwegians have a specific work for this: hygge. It's a slightly supercharged version of mere coziness, though. Used in the context of dealing...
Not a really a suggestion, but FYI the Danish and Norwegians have a specific work for this: hygge. It's a slightly supercharged version of mere coziness, though. Used in the context of dealing with e.g. the long winter.
Though for me, I'd say a solid toke or two of some high CBD low THC cannabis, some bass music and a nice warm shower does it for me. Generally reserved for when I'm in a pissy mood and need to chill out.
Actually I should also add that in the spirit of hygge, it's more of a long-term or lifestyle approach than a mere act or moment.
Thanks for that Danish tidbit, it's always fun to see languages encompass a feeling like that. *just an fyi you added in a ] at the end of the link, and its broken it.
Thanks for that Danish tidbit, it's always fun to see languages encompass a feeling like that.
*just an fyi you added in a ] at the end of the link, and its broken it.
The state of freedom in my mind when all responsibilities are fulfilled and I can do whatever I want or just be infinitely lazy. When I start continuing working on a programming project in a quiet...
The state of freedom in my mind when all responsibilities are fulfilled and I can do whatever I want or just be infinitely lazy.
When I start continuing working on a programming project in a quiet room and am entering the state of flow: my mind finally wraps around what I'm going to do and everything else almost doesn't matter at that moment.
Staying in bed and browsing a subreddit with cozy drawings (slice of life, rain, rooms) or pics of gaming PC builds.
When someone in an online discussion speaks beautiful truth or is telling a relatable story.
That's such an amazing feeling! After finishing all your exams. After finishing the work week (yay today it's friday). Just having the freedom to decide what I want to do, instead of constantly...
That's such an amazing feeling! After finishing all your exams. After finishing the work week (yay today it's friday). Just having the freedom to decide what I want to do, instead of constantly thinking of what I will have to do is so liberating.
Heavy snowfall (big chunky snowflakes), a cozy fireplace, warm blanked, cup of hot chocolate and a comfortable arm chair looking out of the window. Shame that we haven't gotten proper snowfall in...
Heavy snowfall (big chunky snowflakes), a cozy fireplace, warm blanked, cup of hot chocolate and a comfortable arm chair looking out of the window.
Shame that we haven't gotten proper snowfall in years here.
Repeating words is recognized in eastern traditions as a form of mantra practice, whereas here in the west we call it chanting. It doesn't need to have a religious or spiritual element if you're...
Repeating words is recognized in eastern traditions as a form of mantra practice, whereas here in the west we call it chanting. It doesn't need to have a religious or spiritual element if you're not into that. I mentioned in my massive comment elsethread that I do yoga and meditation, and I should point out that I am very atheist yet still find the mantras helpful.
The crackle and the orange shine of fire, especially in a fireplace. The sound of a highway, with tires whispering over the asphalt and the engine rumble doppler-ing closer and then away. The...
The crackle and the orange shine of fire, especially in a fireplace.
The sound of a highway, with tires whispering over the asphalt and the engine rumble doppler-ing closer and then away.
The early rays of sunshine, especially through the mist.
Walking the streets in the true middle of the night (~4 AM here). There's no one around. The streets become more comforting for me, more like home, when there's not a soul seen or heard.
Writing about what I think is somethink that really calms me down when I am upset, angry or overly excited. Sloppy or elaborate, it helps me really understand what I am feeling, "see the big...
Writing about what I think is somethink that really calms me down when I am upset, angry or overly excited. Sloppy or elaborate, it helps me really understand what I am feeling, "see the big picture", and cool me down.
The other day, while my late grandma was still at intensive care (she passed away yesterday, was 99yo), I was angry and upset, because we were essentially subconsciously waiting the news that my nene died, I was trying to convince my mom to not go sleep at the hospital (she wanted to be there for her last minutes, even tho they don't let you in, and we were anxious because she has some serious chronical problems too). All that and many other life problems, I felt so tense and nervous and like I'd have some sort of a breakdown. Then I went to my desk and started writing whatever. Something like half an hour and eight pages later, I was as calm as the Buddha.
Thank you! I an doing well indeed, grandma lived a long, happy life, and I will always remember her with a smile. Indeed, the act of handwriting is so intimate and beautiful that you'd think that...
Thank you! I an doing well indeed, grandma lived a long, happy life, and I will always remember her with a smile.
Indeed, the act of handwriting is so intimate and beautiful that you'd think that it is something humans were born to do, not invented. Whenever I want to write this sort of a thing, I always go with pen and paper, typing is just not equal for some reason.
I feel like I have the weirdest answer, but sometimes when I'm feeling stressed out, in my mind I like to picture just.. a tiny piece of bread, like a slice of white grocery store bread, maybe 2...
I feel like I have the weirdest answer, but sometimes when I'm feeling stressed out, in my mind I like to picture just.. a tiny piece of bread, like a slice of white grocery store bread, maybe 2 inches tall. I'm holding it in my hand, palm up. I'm looking really closely at it: its soft texture, its nice mechanical slice cutting cleanly through the bubbles and the stretched out gluten of it's crumb, Its soft brown crust, its very light bread-weight in my hand.
I like blankets and slippers, background music and light-sources other than the overhead lights at home to feel cozy, in a less weird aspect of the question :P
What you're describing here is actually a visualization technique used in meditation. Not weird at all! All of the details you've provided, the close examination, all of that is very similar to...
What you're describing here is actually a visualization technique used in meditation. Not weird at all! All of the details you've provided, the close examination, all of that is very similar to some of the meditation techniques that I've learned.
Nothing is cozier than being in a tent in a winter sleeping bag with rain pelting the tarp. Every drop thwacking against it in futile assault on your warmth. Feeling a deep sense of relief in...
Nothing is cozier than being in a tent in a winter sleeping bag with rain pelting the tarp. Every drop thwacking against it in futile assault on your warmth. Feeling a deep sense of relief in overcoming the elements.
A recording is a middling substitute when curled up in bed.
Consistency and pursuing disciplines gives me an overall 'comfort' about my life. Day to day, I love to wake up with a hot cup of something like tea or coffee. There's just something about sitting...
Consistency and pursuing disciplines gives me an overall 'comfort' about my life.
Day to day, I love to wake up with a hot cup of something like tea or coffee. There's just something about sitting down and knocking out some of the day's tasks with a fresh mug.
When working, I switch between preferring a very quiet, home environment to a louder environment like a cafe or coworking space, where I can disappear in the sounds, so to speak.
When I get irritated or bored I like to slip into practicing something for ~30-60 minutes, such as practicing combos in street fighter or labbing in super smash brothers melee. I've spent a lot of time getting technically skilled in the game, so I can just mindlessly practice against a CPU or try some things out. Since this type of practice is entirely mechanical it lets my mind wander and reset.
For dinner tonight I made a big pot of chicken soup (the stock was made from bones I'd been saving in the freezer) with rice, lentils, potatoes, rutabaga, carrots, corn, and peas. My family has...
For dinner tonight I made a big pot of chicken soup (the stock was made from bones I'd been saving in the freezer) with rice, lentils, potatoes, rutabaga, carrots, corn, and peas. My family has been fighting off illness for a while now (pretty successfully, but still), and something like this so loaded with veggies was perfect. There's something about root vegetables that is comforting and hearty. We'll be enjoying it for a while.
A while ago I responded to a particular nasty call (I am a volunteer EMT/firefighter) and things got quite messy. It was a tough night. After shift I came home, took a very very long shower in...
A while ago I responded to a particular nasty call (I am a volunteer EMT/firefighter) and things got quite messy. It was a tough night.
After shift I came home, took a very very long shower in steaming hot water. Made some tea, sat on the balcony with all the plants watching the sun rise. It was quite peaceful and relaxing.
Basically, no matter how tough it gets, I remind myself to give myself some time to just be in the moment and enjoy the sights and sounds of nature, be it on a balcony in a crowded city or some secluded forest.
For me it's the feeling of having time ahead of me. I feel comfortable when I have nothing pressing to do and feel free to do anything. In that sense, in can be comfortable even when I'm not...
For me it's the feeling of having time ahead of me. I feel comfortable when I have nothing pressing to do and feel free to do anything. In that sense, in can be comfortable even when I'm not physically comfortable.
I find a few things cozy and relaxing: Sitting in a small, clean space with a coffee and my laptop, working on my coding projects. Whether it is in a cafe that isn't too loud or in my kitchen...
I find a few things cozy and relaxing:
Sitting in a small, clean space with a coffee and my laptop, working on my coding projects. Whether it is in a cafe that isn't too loud or in my kitchen (though it is a bit harder to concentrate in my kitchen).
Falling asleep spooning with a partner who is bigger than me - it feels warm and safe.
Falling asleep with my cat purring against me.
The knowledge that I have a nice chunk of free time ahead of me to use as I see fit. Time that is just my own without any other human around.
I like sitting in my bedroom with a cup of hot cocoa or decaf tea some evenings. It makes me feel warm and very relaxed. I also enjoy reading, and I am about to get back into my artwork. Drawing...
I like sitting in my bedroom with a cup of hot cocoa or decaf tea some evenings. It makes me feel warm and very relaxed. I also enjoy reading, and I am about to get back into my artwork. Drawing also relaxes me.
Tea, with lots of cream and sugar. Warm blanket, Terry Pratchett book, favourite album, and someone I care about to chat with. Oh and to have had a good, hearty meal within the last couple hours.
Tea, with lots of cream and sugar. Warm blanket, Terry Pratchett book, favourite album, and someone I care about to chat with.
Oh and to have had a good, hearty meal within the last couple hours.
Sitting back with a nice pair of headphones (or well calibrated monitors) listening to a favorite album start to finish, without interruptions or distractions.
Sitting back with a nice pair of headphones (or well calibrated monitors) listening to a favorite album start to finish, without interruptions or distractions.
A plush bathrobe and comfy slippers can go a long way.
Taking time in the morning to drink coffee (or whatever) and just be still, instead of grabbing something to go as I rush out the door, is a much better way to start the day for my mental health.
Where I live there is not a lot of natural light at this time of year, so I also recommend strategic use of sun lamps and sunrise simulators to combat depression.
I get my hair cut at a barbershop that includes a shampoo and scalp massage. It's a little thing but I always look forward to it. Hot towels are a similar barbershop/spa luxury I recommend.
Sounds like you've already tried more setups than I have, so I'm not sure how much I can offer. My need was to get out of bed, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed, on mornings when the sun wasn't due for another 4+ hours. I got a Philips sunrise lamp / alarm clock a few years ago and it helped a ton. Looking online now, they have a bunch of more sophisticated options that look pretty interesting these days. The one I have is fairly simple. It's a warm hue, which is nice.
Going to bed earlier helped with this too, as I just have more presence of mind and a better attitude for the day when I'm well rested. I also wake up to this song, which is the peaceful-est alarm sound I've come across. I just can't deal with being startled awake by klaxons or whatever.
For me personally it's dim, warm light that does the trick. Don't make it too dim though, you still need to light up the entire room. Avoid blue or greenish lights. Put a tune on the radio or on headphones, have a drink(tea/water/juice) and just sit back and be offline for a bit.
To duffuse the light, get it shine onto the ceiling at multiple points while being not visible directly. Just a common omnidirectional light fixture is indeed like a bright spot of light.
Aim a bright light at the ceiling instead of down, it'll create a very well diffused light.
I just point my 40W halogen desk lamp up instead of down and the ceiling and walls diffuse the light all over the room.
Do you happen to have any Kindle or another display with e-ink? Try reading a book before bed, or doing about 15 minutes of light cleanup around the house.
I know, and loathe the feeling of eyestrain - it's due to focusing your eyesight on an object at the same distance for a long period of time. There's no way around it except for short breaks - I remember there was a Chrome addon that prompted you to take 10min breaks every hour and stretch, maybe try that?
Sitting down with a fragrant cup of tea (usually tieguanyin or puerh or something with a strong smell) and instrumental music or vocals in a language I don't speak. Then just stare outside or into the room, or close my eyes. I think it's almost meditation, and it works.
You can also use LibreSprite, which is a fork of the last AsePrite version released under the GPL, instead of their current EULA. You'll still have to compile it yourself - I hoped they would have added binary releases since I last saw it, but no such luck - but it's not too bad.
Though, binaries for AsePrite 1.1.6 (last version is 1.2.10-beta4) still exist in the Debian/Ubuntu repos.
I sometimes draw on Android, and I use dotpict there. Sadly, it's not FOSS, but I don't like (and struggle to use) any of the apps I can find on F-Droid (w. IzzyDroid repos).
I just looked into it and, while it's newer than the version of AsePrite that I used to play around with, it doesn't seem like they are even trying to maintain feature parity, let alone develop it further.
Working on a project in silence with the window open. It’s so peaceful having the only sounds be your keyboard and the world outside!
That's especially wonderful at night, preferably with quiet crickets outside.
As someone dealing with a lot of anxiety, finding ways to relax is something I have spent a lot of time on. I tried various anxiolytics, but they made things far worse and had other... unpleasant... side effects that my doctor was certain wouldn't happen. So I've turned to other methods. There are a lot of things people have already mentioned, but I'll embellish and add a few.
I didn't see anyone mention yoga. I have a daily yoga practice at a local studio. They also do meditation in addition to yoga, which I find to be crucial for calming my nerves. Yoga and meditation are the best, most reliable things I do for my anxiety. There are many other benefits (including things people don't tend to mention much like improved pulmonary function, but also the usual strength, balance, flexibility, body awareness, etc.) and I cannot recommend it enough. I wholeheartedly recommend practicing at a studio if you can, both because you build a community of friends and so you're less likely to get hurt. The style I practice is by far not the only style; it can be as gentle or as active as you want, as focused on stretching or strength as you like, etc. I could write an entire novella about this, but I'll stop here to get onto my other points. :) One thing I will say that anyone can do is pranayama, which is a fancy way of saying specific, controlled breathing exercises. I can go into more detail in another comment if anyone is interested; this one is going to be enormous as-is.
Tea is a universal thing, and I have so many different teas. I have literally dozens of different kinds of tea in my apartment. Usually I'll go for mint when I want a cozy, comforting, relaxed mood. I really enjoy this tea from Stash in that situation, as I find peppermint a bit too strong for that mood. Tastes differ, but I find I can enjoy that tea without any kind of sweetener. It's a lot better with some sugar, of course, and more soothing. A good chai always brightens my mood, too, particularly brewed strong and sweet, the traditional way (although I brew mine with water rather than milk for convenience).
Others have mentioned music. Relaxing music is something I have focused on curating for two decades. This is another thing that I could write a novella on, but I'll try to keep it succinct. I'll list artists here where anything they've done fits the mood, and specific albums when their content varies and you should focus on something. The genre you're looking for here is ambient, but depending upon how things are classified you will likely find some of these under electronic. Thom Brennan is fabulous for this kind of thing, and often I'll just listen to his whole discography. A lot of Max Corbacho's work is lovely, too. Ars Lucis and its "sequel" Horizon Matrix work particularly well. Brian Eno's Ambient One: Music for Airports is obligatory. Nils Frahm's Wintermusik, especially Ambre, is heartstoppingly beautiful. Steve Roach is another major name in this field, and has so many works that it's hard to suggest just one. The Quiet Music series (three numbered albums) is a great place to start. Dreamtime Return is really good, as are his collaborations with Robert Rich (particularly Strata), who we'll get back to in a moment. Anything from Jonn Serrie (especially And the Stars Go With You, Ixlandia, and Lumia Nights), Patrick O'Hearn (especially So Flows the Current, The So Flows Sessions, and Slow Time), and David Helpling (The Crossing, his collaboration with Jon Jenkins) work extremely well here. If I haven't bored you yet, you will recall that I mentioned Robert Rich and that we'd get back to him. If you're interested in longform (and I mean "longform": 6+ hours per album), his Somnium and Perpetual albums are absolute masterpieces in relaxation. Somnium was designed for his so-called sleep concerts, and is the most specifically "meant to help you fall asleep" recommendation in this long list. I haven't even gotten to my new obsessions, lofi and jazzhop. I'm still exploring there; give me a few years and I'll have some solid recommendations. I take my music seriously.
Another thing I haven't seen anyone mention is candles. I particularly enjoy scented candles, specifically those from Yankee Candle, as I've not found any others that produce a scent that I notice (the phrase used in the industry, which I'll use going forward, is "throwing" a scent). I live in a small apartment, so it doesn't take long for a candle to throw its scent throughout my entire place. It's so comforting and soothing to come back to a favorite scent after I've been out all day. Sure, burning candles--and leaving flames unattended--is in direct violation of my lease, but I don't leave them unattended if they're close to finishing. I can't make recommendations for scents because everyone is different, but I'm particularly fond of vanilla, pine / evergreen trees, and apples / spices. If you're buying from Yankee Candle, wait until they have a sale. Their products aren't cheap, but absolutely worth it IMO. Even if you don't want scented candles, turning off all of your electric lights and lighting a dozen votives can be just as nice. Candlelight has an organic, imperfect, soothing quality that electric lights never will.
A few folks have mentioned baths. I have grown to really enjoy bath bombs from Lush. They're environmentalist hippies and that makes me happy. Plus no animal testing! I'm particularly fond of Intergalactic, but definitely find what works for you. Draw a warm (not hot; you don't want to be sweating) bath, drop in the bath bomb, and breathe. I haven't combined proper meditation techniques with a bath bomb, yet, but I can't imagine it would be a bad time. Feel free to add music (like something listed above) as well, though with that much relaxation you should be wary not to fall asleep in the bath like I have! ;)
On the more sensual side of things, don't underestimate the value of good clothes. Don't hesitate to spoil yourself by running your clothes through the dryer for a little while before putting them on. Nothing wrong with spoiling yourself like that. The same goes for some good chocolate, either solid or liquid.
I'm sure I'll remember some other stuff, but this is absolutely enough for now.
Thank you for sharing so many suggestions.
Hopefully you find them helpful. :) I know too well what it's like to deal with a lot of stress / anxiety.
It's a cliche but a nice cup of tea. It could be as simple as a good strong cup of builder's or the full-onness of whipping up a bowl of matcha. The process is relaxing as much as the drinking.
Shaving. I used to use a straight razor but I don't so much any more, I usually use a double-edge razor instead. But there's a whole process, whipping up a lather, massaging it in, then the shave itself. You have to concentrate, but you don't have to think. It's a perfect way to engender flow and that's such a great way to relax.
BATH. I didn't get into baths until recently but damn. Get me some of that bubbly, lovely smelling stuff in there and put on the radio and that's so nice. Nobody can make you do anything when you're in the bath, all you can do is lie there and chill. Plus the hot water really helps my back untense so I end up in slightly less pain than usual afterwards.
Also cooking. I don't have to think when I cook and the bonus is that I get to eat at the end of it.
Not a really a suggestion, but FYI the Danish and Norwegians have a specific work for this: hygge. It's a slightly supercharged version of mere coziness, though. Used in the context of dealing with e.g. the long winter.
Though for me, I'd say a solid toke or two of some high CBD low THC cannabis, some bass music and a nice warm shower does it for me. Generally reserved for when I'm in a pissy mood and need to chill out.
Actually I should also add that in the spirit of hygge, it's more of a long-term or lifestyle approach than a mere act or moment.
Thanks for that Danish tidbit, it's always fun to see languages encompass a feeling like that.
*just an fyi you added in a ] at the end of the link, and its broken it.
The state of freedom in my mind when all responsibilities are fulfilled and I can do whatever I want or just be infinitely lazy.
When I start continuing working on a programming project in a quiet room and am entering the state of flow: my mind finally wraps around what I'm going to do and everything else almost doesn't matter at that moment.
Staying in bed and browsing a subreddit with cozy drawings (slice of life, rain, rooms) or pics of gaming PC builds.
When someone in an online discussion speaks beautiful truth or is telling a relatable story.
Also hugs.
That's such an amazing feeling! After finishing all your exams. After finishing the work week (yay today it's friday). Just having the freedom to decide what I want to do, instead of constantly thinking of what I will have to do is so liberating.
Oh yes also hugs.
Heavy snowfall (big chunky snowflakes), a cozy fireplace, warm blanked, cup of hot chocolate and a comfortable arm chair looking out of the window.
Shame that we haven't gotten proper snowfall in years here.
Repeating words is recognized in eastern traditions as a form of mantra practice, whereas here in the west we call it chanting. It doesn't need to have a religious or spiritual element if you're not into that. I mentioned in my massive comment elsethread that I do yoga and meditation, and I should point out that I am very atheist yet still find the mantras helpful.
The crackle and the orange shine of fire, especially in a fireplace.
The sound of a highway, with tires whispering over the asphalt and the engine rumble doppler-ing closer and then away.
The early rays of sunshine, especially through the mist.
Walking the streets in the true middle of the night (~4 AM here). There's no one around. The streets become more comforting for me, more like home, when there's not a soul seen or heard.
For me there's nothing more relaxing than making some tea, smoking some weed and listening to my psychedelic music playlist.
That sounds heavenly.
Writing about what I think is somethink that really calms me down when I am upset, angry or overly excited. Sloppy or elaborate, it helps me really understand what I am feeling, "see the big picture", and cool me down.
The other day, while my late grandma was still at intensive care (she passed away yesterday, was 99yo), I was angry and upset, because we were essentially subconsciously waiting the news that my nene died, I was trying to convince my mom to not go sleep at the hospital (she wanted to be there for her last minutes, even tho they don't let you in, and we were anxious because she has some serious chronical problems too). All that and many other life problems, I felt so tense and nervous and like I'd have some sort of a breakdown. Then I went to my desk and started writing whatever. Something like half an hour and eight pages later, I was as calm as the Buddha.
Thank you! I an doing well indeed, grandma lived a long, happy life, and I will always remember her with a smile.
Indeed, the act of handwriting is so intimate and beautiful that you'd think that it is something humans were born to do, not invented. Whenever I want to write this sort of a thing, I always go with pen and paper, typing is just not equal for some reason.
I feel like I have the weirdest answer, but sometimes when I'm feeling stressed out, in my mind I like to picture just.. a tiny piece of bread, like a slice of white grocery store bread, maybe 2 inches tall. I'm holding it in my hand, palm up. I'm looking really closely at it: its soft texture, its nice mechanical slice cutting cleanly through the bubbles and the stretched out gluten of it's crumb, Its soft brown crust, its very light bread-weight in my hand.
I like blankets and slippers, background music and light-sources other than the overhead lights at home to feel cozy, in a less weird aspect of the question :P
What you're describing here is actually a visualization technique used in meditation. Not weird at all! All of the details you've provided, the close examination, all of that is very similar to some of the meditation techniques that I've learned.
The feeling of a Log cabin home, heated by a wood fireplace.
A space heater, a blanket, a pillow, and a good scifi or anime show to binge.
Nothing is cozier than being in a tent in a winter sleeping bag with rain pelting the tarp. Every drop thwacking against it in futile assault on your warmth. Feeling a deep sense of relief in overcoming the elements.
A recording is a middling substitute when curled up in bed.
training judo.
its stress relieving and the repetitive movements are kind of meditative like sharpening a knife
Consistency and pursuing disciplines gives me an overall 'comfort' about my life.
Day to day, I love to wake up with a hot cup of something like tea or coffee. There's just something about sitting down and knocking out some of the day's tasks with a fresh mug.
When working, I switch between preferring a very quiet, home environment to a louder environment like a cafe or coworking space, where I can disappear in the sounds, so to speak.
When I get irritated or bored I like to slip into practicing something for ~30-60 minutes, such as practicing combos in street fighter or labbing in super smash brothers melee. I've spent a lot of time getting technically skilled in the game, so I can just mindlessly practice against a CPU or try some things out. Since this type of practice is entirely mechanical it lets my mind wander and reset.
For dinner tonight I made a big pot of chicken soup (the stock was made from bones I'd been saving in the freezer) with rice, lentils, potatoes, rutabaga, carrots, corn, and peas. My family has been fighting off illness for a while now (pretty successfully, but still), and something like this so loaded with veggies was perfect. There's something about root vegetables that is comforting and hearty. We'll be enjoying it for a while.
A while ago I responded to a particular nasty call (I am a volunteer EMT/firefighter) and things got quite messy. It was a tough night.
After shift I came home, took a very very long shower in steaming hot water. Made some tea, sat on the balcony with all the plants watching the sun rise. It was quite peaceful and relaxing.
Basically, no matter how tough it gets, I remind myself to give myself some time to just be in the moment and enjoy the sights and sounds of nature, be it on a balcony in a crowded city or some secluded forest.
Playing an instrument (guitar or kalimba in my case). It really clears your mind.
For me it's the feeling of having time ahead of me. I feel comfortable when I have nothing pressing to do and feel free to do anything. In that sense, in can be comfortable even when I'm not physically comfortable.
I find a few things cozy and relaxing:
I like sitting in my bedroom with a cup of hot cocoa or decaf tea some evenings. It makes me feel warm and very relaxed. I also enjoy reading, and I am about to get back into my artwork. Drawing also relaxes me.
Tea, with lots of cream and sugar. Warm blanket, Terry Pratchett book, favourite album, and someone I care about to chat with.
Oh and to have had a good, hearty meal within the last couple hours.
Sitting back with a nice pair of headphones (or well calibrated monitors) listening to a favorite album start to finish, without interruptions or distractions.