DefinitelyNotAFae's recent activity
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Comment on Dimension 20: A Starstruck Odyssey Season 1 in ~games.tabletop
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Comment on Dimension 20: A Starstruck Odyssey Season 1 in ~games.tabletop
DefinitelyNotAFae LinkThe ball is rolling up!The ball is rolling up!
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Comment on Proposal: For sensitive topics, if a thread is intended for a particular demographic, there needs another thread open for everyone to discuss without having to join the targeted thread in ~tildes
DefinitelyNotAFae Link ParentBoundaries are essential to good relationships (general not romantic) and similarly communication. I don't agree with your definition as it's nothing I've ever heard used to describe the term....Boundaries are essential to good relationships (general not romantic) and similarly communication.
I don't agree with your definition as it's nothing I've ever heard used to describe the term. Having to be invited to Tildes to participate is itself a boundary and clearly isn't antithetical to discussion
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Comment on Proposal: For sensitive topics, if a thread is intended for a particular demographic, there needs another thread open for everyone to discuss without having to join the targeted thread in ~tildes
DefinitelyNotAFae Link ParentOn the contrary, I think that boundaries are necessary for mutual respect and functional discussion.On the contrary, I think that boundaries are necessary for mutual respect and functional discussion.
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Comment on Proposal: For sensitive topics, if a thread is intended for a particular demographic, there needs another thread open for everyone to discuss without having to join the targeted thread in ~tildes
DefinitelyNotAFae Link ParentDescribing hypothetical people is not accusing actual people of something. Walking in and saying "you're being fragile" is the sort of thing typically only a close friend or therapist can pull...Describing hypothetical people is not accusing actual people of something. Walking in and saying "you're being fragile" is the sort of thing typically only a close friend or therapist can pull off. They didn't suggest going back and yelling how fragile people were in those previous threads for example.
We are not in that conversation, just talking about it. So it does not make sense to conflate the description of fragility with accusing people of fragility. No one suggested the hashtag you invented either.
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Comment on Walter Koenig dead at 90 in ~tv
DefinitelyNotAFae LinkNooooooooooo Ó╭╮ÒNooooooooooo Ó╭╮Ò
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Comment on Proposal: For sensitive topics, if a thread is intended for a particular demographic, there needs another thread open for everyone to discuss without having to join the targeted thread in ~tildes
DefinitelyNotAFae Link ParentSuggestions aren't failures, I am also just a single person not the knower of all things. I just don't think this works.Suggestions aren't failures, I am also just a single person not the knower of all things. I just don't think this works.
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Comment on Proposal: For sensitive topics, if a thread is intended for a particular demographic, there needs another thread open for everyone to discuss without having to join the targeted thread in ~tildes
DefinitelyNotAFae Link ParentI don't think that I would be able to ignore it because it's still here. And plenty of things are toxic and harmful without rising to the level of moderation. I don't have a strong opinion about...I don't think that I would be able to ignore it because it's still here. And plenty of things are toxic and harmful without rising to the level of moderation.
I don't have a strong opinion about that thread, but I was mostly disappointed in the ongoing hostility as I am with all of the threads on the topic, including this one.
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Comment on Proposal: For sensitive topics, if a thread is intended for a particular demographic, there needs another thread open for everyone to discuss without having to join the targeted thread in ~tildes
DefinitelyNotAFae LinkA thread full of people sharing their transphobic opinions about how it's good actually that trans folks are being thrown under the bus is still a negative experience for the trans people on this...- Exemplary
A thread full of people sharing their transphobic opinions about how it's good actually that trans folks are being thrown under the bus is still a negative experience for the trans people on this site, and a negative reflection on the users of the site regardless of whether there's another thread where that hypothetically isn't happening.
And trans folks and allies will still feel compelled to do all the same labor to correct misconceptions and outright lies.
If socially we cannot agree to being thoughtful of people's experiences, I doubt we agree on posting two threads. I do not think this is the correct answer.
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Comment on Babylon 5 S2E16: "In the Shadow of Z’ha’Dum" - Episode Discussion in ~tv
DefinitelyNotAFae Link ParentIt is definitely a major keystone in the overarching plot. For me I find the Nightwatch armband more ominous than Mordan's secrets in this episode. If Sinclair had stayed Commander this would have...It is definitely a major keystone in the overarching plot.
For me I find the Nightwatch armband more ominous than Mordan's secrets in this episode.
If Sinclair had stayed Commander this would have been about Catherine Sakai, a much more recent, more raw loss... Though Sheridan is raw enough for everyone. I wish I could see the alternative universe version too for how things could have played out.
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Comment on Babylon 5 S2E15: "And Now for a Word" - Episode Discussion in ~tv
DefinitelyNotAFae Link ParentTHE CORPS IS YOUR FRIEND Adding in the subliminal messages was great. Also you can see how there's increased bias in the media, as if they're being told to seek out a particular type of storyTHE CORPS IS YOUR FRIEND
Adding in the subliminal messages was great.
Also you can see how there's increased bias in the media, as if they're being told to seek out a particular type of story
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Comment on Men in tech #YesAllMen in ~life.women
DefinitelyNotAFae Link ParentYeah there may be something the doc can tell me that's different than the internet. We'll see. Tbh if I'd figured gender out earlier (the stick poking wasn't new but it didn't resolve into its...Yeah there may be something the doc can tell me that's different than the internet. We'll see.
Tbh if I'd figured gender out earlier (the stick poking wasn't new but it didn't resolve into its current shape until more recently) maybe I'd have a better grasp on it, or maybe I'd feel different about hormones and my body. But mostly I'm just too gender meh to fuck with it for any length of time.
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Comment on Men in tech #YesAllMen in ~life.women
DefinitelyNotAFae (edited )Link ParentMy mom had a hysterectomy pre-menopause and I've been on HBC implants for over a decade and oral/injections before that. So yeah I have absolutely no idea anymore. I checked out the calculator and...My mom had a hysterectomy pre-menopause and I've been on HBC implants for over a decade and oral/injections before that. So yeah I have absolutely no idea anymore.
I checked out the calculator and it can't handle the total lack of periods from an implant and told me I'm post menopause. So I guess. If I pretend I have regular periods, it puts me at age 52 so I have a decade before menopause and I'm definitely not in peri. Lol. Figures. Poking around the implant makes both hormone tests and typical estimates impossible apparently
It's mostly that talking all about this as women's health combined with the original topic is weirdly internally invalidating in a way that is probably more about my inability to parse my brain into different bits. Tbh sometimes I just poke my gender with a stick, it's not the worst thing.
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Comment on Men in tech #YesAllMen in ~life.women
DefinitelyNotAFae Link ParentVery fair, I'm absolutely bringing it up with my doc, a decade ago we couldn't find anything and it was definitely not peri then, but one of my big frustrations is how nebulous the idea of...Very fair, I'm absolutely bringing it up with my doc, a decade ago we couldn't find anything and it was definitely not peri then, but one of my big frustrations is how nebulous the idea of perimenopause is. Much like a lot of women's health tbh. (And like how I'm nonbinary and while I do use "nonbinary woman" as a gender label I also don't feel quite right with that and most of all of this is subtly internally invalidating in a way I can't articulate because I can still speak this way and I'm still perceived this way, and also its not a full picture of me and ugh idk random aside)
Follow through is just really hard. And finances are hard. And giving myself permission to take time off is hard. Yay therapy
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Comment on Midweek Movie Free Talk in ~movies
DefinitelyNotAFae Link ParentIt's short for Prudence (but may not be a nick name). I'm most familiar with it from the Great British Bake Off judge but names go in cycles so I wouldn't be surprised if it's on the rise in some way.It's short for Prudence (but may not be a nick name). I'm most familiar with it from the Great British Bake Off judge but names go in cycles so I wouldn't be surprised if it's on the rise in some way.
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Comment on Midweek Movie Free Talk in ~movies
DefinitelyNotAFae Link ParentThe Fifth Element is super green!The Fifth Element is super green!
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Comment on Jeopardy! YouTube Edition | Full episode feat. Michelle Khare, Angela Giarratana, Josh Scherer in ~tv
DefinitelyNotAFae LinkI think Brennan coming out and all of the immediate dick jokes about the trophy were hilarious. Really enjoyable!I think Brennan coming out and all of the immediate dick jokes about the trophy were hilarious.
Really enjoyable!
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Comment on Meta ordered to pay $25 billion penalty in New Mexico Cambridge Analytica case in ~tech
DefinitelyNotAFae (edited )Link ParentJury awards often get reduced by judges either for "reasonability" or due to statute or because they don't want it overturned on appeal just because of the award. It was closer to what the...Jury awards often get reduced by judges either for "reasonability" or due to statute or because they don't want it overturned on appeal just because of the award. It was closer to what the lawmakers had asked for in this case.
The judge probably provided reasoning but it'd require court papers. I'll poke around Lawsky and see if someone talked about it
He didn't explain it apparently (there are state constitutional arguments apparently that could hurt on appeal I guess). It also may have been to reduce the likelihood of appeal
New Mexico judge reduces jury’s penalty against Meta to $25 billion | Courthouse News Service https://www.courthousenews.com/new-mexico-judge-reduces-jurys-penalty-against-meta-to-25-billion/
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Comment on Weekly US politics news and updates thread - week of October 19 in ~society
DefinitelyNotAFae Link ParentA lot of places have stricter campaign laws, but part of what is so awful about this is that they tested it by polling people before it got released publicly and it works on a certain subset of...A lot of places have stricter campaign laws, but part of what is so awful about this is that they tested it by polling people before it got released publicly and it works on a certain subset of voters he wanted. But there has been pretty widespread backlash, it's just a matter of whether his gains outweigh his losses.
Because her being a past victim will probably hurt her by some amount regardless of everything else. How much they can make the lies stick - Trump also was pushing the lies - vs the "so you support pedophiles" counterbalance... Idk.
He did run in 2024 yes but is starting to fall afoul of the white supremacy in the right even as very rich awful human.
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Comment on US State Department unveils plan to only promote Donald Trump supporters in ~society
DefinitelyNotAFae Link ParentAs I said, the flippancy was a poor way to make the point and a worse way to demonstrate that you think it's a serious issue.As I said, the flippancy was a poor way to make the point and a worse way to demonstrate that you think it's a serious issue.
It was definitely one of my favs too and normally I don't enjoy ship based combat so much. I think the setting being so inherently bizarre really helped work with the Intrepid Heroes shenanigans.
I forget the order, have you seen Burrow's End yet? It's soooo good