NeonBright's recent activity
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Comment on What do you need to vent about? in ~talk
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Comment on Hi, how are you? Mental health support and discussion thread (June 2025) in ~health.mental
NeonBright Link ParentThis is actually... really good? :-) You are becoming aware of the world outside of pure survival. That's a good thing! Having opinions about stuff, even if they are negative ones, is better than...This is actually... really good? :-)
You are becoming aware of the world outside of pure survival. That's a good thing!
Having opinions about stuff, even if they are negative ones, is better than emotional paralysis.
Because eventually - when you are ready - you'll start moving again, and that will be the start of the next phase of your life. -
Comment on Tips for starting a garden? in ~hobbies
NeonBright Link ParentPlants dying can be a good thing, at least in the long run. It's a quick way of learning what works in your microclimate, and what does not. No-one, not even the pro gardeners, are good at growing...Plants dying can be a good thing, at least in the long run.
It's a quick way of learning what works in your microclimate, and what does not.
No-one, not even the pro gardeners, are good at growing everything.I strongly endorse the 'peeking into other people's yards' approach mentioned above.
Start out copying the varieties and strategies that have been successful for others in your neighbourhood. If that works for you, then you can begin to improvise and adapt. -
Comment on If you could travel back in time and bring one thing back to the modern day, what would it be? in ~talk
NeonBright Link ParentCan we not just carry a basket of fertile dodo eggs purloined from a nest (or three)? Less muss, less fuss - and a wider genetic pool, too.Can we not just carry a basket of fertile dodo eggs purloined from a nest (or three)?
Less muss, less fuss - and a wider genetic pool, too. -
Comment on Activities to do out of the house with an elderly relative? in ~life
NeonBright Link ParentOh, please, please not bingo; or at least, do your due diligence ahead of time! The frail elderly in my family loathe and detest bingo, and it is all they ever seem to be offered. While there are...Oh, please, please not bingo; or at least, do your due diligence ahead of time!
The frail elderly in my family loathe and detest bingo, and it is all they ever seem to be offered.
While there are certainly some that love it, there are also those that absolutely do not.Plus, bingo is very widely offered and available to almost any senior person, and I think OP is looking for something that is a bit more of a stretch than this.
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Comment on 100 notable books of 2024 in ~books
NeonBright Link ParentThank you, very useful!Thank you, very useful!
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Comment on Any recommendations for books, novellas and short story collections? in ~books
NeonBright LinkAnything by Becky Chambers - her books have substance, but in a calm and reflective and yet completely enjoyable and accessible way. In a similar vein but going back aways, Zena Henderson did some...Anything by Becky Chambers - her books have substance, but in a calm and reflective and yet completely enjoyable and accessible way.
In a similar vein but going back aways, Zena Henderson did some great character-driven SF stories as well.
While we are dredging around in the past, Roald Dahl (yes, the Charlie and the Chocolate Factory guy) wrote three or four volumes of really good short stories for adults, most of which have quite disturbing horror-adjacent themes - and thereby maintaining a degree of shock value even today - but they are written in a clear and jaunty way that makes them enjoyable to read, and each one is bite-sized. Not at all like contemporary horror, and keep in mind he is an excellent writer who understands the craft involved in story telling.
Elizabeth Gilbert's A Signature of All Things is a longer novel that takes in... a lot of things... and is very absorbing to read.
If you want a rolicking read without a scrap of commonsense but lots of characterisation and decent plotting and some genuinely laugh out loud moments, try the Stephanie Plum series of detective novels by Janet Evanovich. Start at the series beginning, and if you like them you are in luck because I think there are about 30 of them.
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Comment on ‘Mild’ tofu, ‘mild’ carrots, ‘mild’ pine nuts: my five-year quest to understand German taste in ~food
NeonBright Link ParentRaw meat is generally pretty pleasant to eat. The raw meat people choose to eat is analogous to sushi - it's selected cuts and treatments of raw flesh, rather than random bits hacked off a...Raw meat is generally pretty pleasant to eat.
The raw meat people choose to eat is analogous to sushi - it's selected cuts and treatments of raw flesh, rather than random bits hacked off a carcass.It's mild and sweet, and usually quite tender due to the way it is cut and treated (large cuts of raw meat can be tough, as is anything at all to do with sinew or fascia, but raw meat is cut thinly and scraped or minced, and the initial piece of meat is selected with care.
Too many condiments, or the wrong ones, can overpower the taste of raw meat, but if a dish 'mainly tastes like condiments' someone is doing something wrong.
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Comment on Why does "Everything Everywhere All at Once" repulse me so much? in ~movies
NeonBright LinkMaybe it's because you have good instincts?! Brace yourself for the unpopular opinion here. To me it's a genuinely terrible film, and I have no idea how it came to be so popular. It's choppy,...Maybe it's because you have good instincts?!
Brace yourself for the unpopular opinion here.
To me it's a genuinely terrible film, and I have no idea how it came to be so popular.
It's choppy, poorly thought through, intermittently gross, and even manages to be mawkish in a contrived way towards the end. Worst of all, it manages to be boring in places despite the hectic pacing.You could have knocked me over with a feather when it became everyone's darling for the season, because to me it's just a huge conceptual error from start to finish.
Don't get me wrong, I would have loved to have liked it, because it has such a different premise - but there's just nothing there to like.
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Comment on "twitter.com" is now officially dead in ~tech
NeonBright LinkI know it's a minority view, but I'd be delighted if the word 'twitter' could be reclaimed by it's rightful owners - small birds everywhere. The english language lost a rather nice and useful word...I know it's a minority view, but I'd be delighted if the word 'twitter' could be reclaimed by it's rightful owners - small birds everywhere.
The english language lost a rather nice and useful word with the rise of that social media platform, and it would be pleasing to get it back again. -
Comment on Reddit, AI spam bots explore new ways to show ads in your feed in ~tech
NeonBright Link ParentLate reply here, but I just went over to Kagi and I'm pretty happy with the results. I tore through their free 100 searches in a few days and the experience convinced me to take out a...Late reply here, but I just went over to Kagi and I'm pretty happy with the results.
I tore through their free 100 searches in a few days and the experience convinced me to take out a subscription.
It's pretty expensive here in local dollars, and it hurts to pay almost $200 for a service google provides 'for free', but for my purposes as a fact-focused private individual kagi does a pretty good job of cutting through the dross.
Google - which I once loved - has become almost unusable.A significant thing about this whole experience though is that I now see subscriptions as kind of inevitable; I reaaaaally didn't want to pay for this service, yet here I am.
But the truely horrible thing is that I know, deep in my heart, that it's only a matter of time until these paid subscription services start advertising to me, too...
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Comment on What have you been watching / reading this week? (Anime/Manga) in ~anime
NeonBright LinkI'm new to anime, but I'm enjoying the pacing and themes of Mr Villain's Day Off. The joy is in the minutiae - and the absolute lack of interest in adhering to hollywood-style plot structure and...I'm new to anime, but I'm enjoying the pacing and themes of Mr Villain's Day Off.
The joy is in the minutiae - and the absolute lack of interest in adhering to hollywood-style plot structure and expectations; the focus is very slice-of-life.
Very relaxing viewing! - if a little panda-forward at times. -
Comment on VHEMT: the Voluntary Human Extinction Movement in ~life
NeonBright Link ParentThe 'age 30' thing is no coincidence. There is a significant subset of women who do not want children throughout their teens and 20s and then around age 30 abruptly change their mind. I'm not...The 'age 30' thing is no coincidence.
There is a significant subset of women who do not want children throughout their teens and 20s and then around age 30 abruptly change their mind. I'm not speculating on whether this is prompted by social or physiological changes, but it absolutely happens.
Consequently health care professionals are loathe to sterilise young childless women, in case they experience this change in perspective and then a significant avoidable regret.
Their reasoning is along the lines that reversible contraception is easy and effective (comparatively speaking) but that permanent sterilisation is, well, permanent - and so it's better to opt for the reversible version in the first instance. -
Comment on What precautions to take when someone is out to get you? in ~life
NeonBright LinkDocument everything. Get into the habit of keeping brief notes of any conversation/interaction you have with your ex, and where appropriate sending them a text or quick email summary of what was...Document everything.
Get into the habit of keeping brief notes of any conversation/interaction you have with your ex, and where appropriate sending them a text or quick email summary of what was said. Along the lines of "Just confirming that we agreed that little Johnny won't be going to summer camp this year", or whatever.
This way you will have a timestamped papertrail of your interactions. It will also be easier for others to see if there was a concerning pattern of behaviour, or an escalation, should things go south at some point in the future.
Even if nothing ever happens, it's still a pretty useful record of events for your own personal reference about day to day interactions and agreements; I did this years ago for a difficult neighbour and it was very useful to be able to confidently and accurately refer to a conversation from six months previously.
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Comment on <deleted topic> in ~tech
NeonBright Link ParentThis post is very close to being an exemplar of the problems OP was attempting to describe.This post is very close to being an exemplar of the problems OP was attempting to describe.
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Comment on A romantic retrospective in ~talk
NeonBright LinkYou use words well, and you are thoughtful about your own actions. That bodes well for the future. First we observe what we do; then we seek to change it. You are young. Clever, I think - but...You use words well, and you are thoughtful about your own actions.
That bodes well for the future. First we observe what we do; then we seek to change it.You are young. Clever, I think - but still young. You might also be mildly depressed.
These things are almost the hallmarks of your generation, who are proving slow to mature and a little emotionally vulnerable, when observed collectively.This slow journey to maturity isn't necessarily your fault; our society is acting en masse to make the markers of maturity hard to access for this rising generation.
Meanwhile the emotional vulnerability that you and possibly your autistic friend and also so many, many others are experiencing seems to be another unintentional product of the way in which western society is currently choosing to conduct itself.
My advice would be to be kind to yourself, because at the age of 23 you have time on your side... but also to make every action count.
With every action - romantic or otherwise, big or small - promise yourself to make the moral choice (according to your own interpretation of the word), not the expedient one.This will do two things.
The first is that it will make you focus on the substance and the consequence of your own actions. All of them.
The second is that in a slow but cumulative way, your life will improve because your actions and your values will begin to fall into much closer alignment. This leads to far greater life satisfaction.And as for romance? That will come of it's own accord.
As someone else in this thread right said, it can't be forced. But it's best to be well prepared for the moment when it does come. -
Comment on <deleted topic> in ~life.women
NeonBright Link ParentMy baby and I were separated, me at one hospital and the baby at another, because our different health needs at the time could not be accommodated by any one institution. 0/10, do not recommend....My baby and I were separated, me at one hospital and the baby at another, because our different health needs at the time could not be accommodated by any one institution.
0/10, do not recommend.
Especially since the nurses at the hospital that I was at did not seem to understand that my baby was not in the nursery down the hall, but several miles away.
It was one hell of a motivator to get up out of that bed and get myself discharged. -
Comment on US stores increasingly reverse course on self checkout in ~tech
NeonBright Link ParentI thought I was the only one with those concerns. I'm very much just an end-point user, but I also am quite concerned about advanced old age and the ever-changing UI. It has the potential to make...I thought I was the only one with those concerns.
I'm very much just an end-point user, but I also am quite concerned about advanced old age and the ever-changing UI. It has the potential to make everything from communication to banking quite difficult later in life.(It also makes me more sympathetic to the oldsters in our family who are grimly hanging on to their cheque books, despite the banks having made it quite clear that cheques will be obsolete in our country within a couple of years.)
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Comment on How many of you wouldn't be alive if it weren't for modern medicine? in ~talk
NeonBright Link ParentI found this explanation of your approach to modifying your own gut biome fascinating, thanks for sharing.I found this explanation of your approach to modifying your own gut biome fascinating, thanks for sharing.
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Comment on What's on your Christmas lists, dads of Tildes? in ~life.men
NeonBright Link ParentNot disputing, just adding my 2c worth. My fairly robust metal wedding ring saved my hand/fingers from being slammed in a car door. Ended up with a little bruising rather than mincemeat. So I'm...Not disputing, just adding my 2c worth.
My fairly robust metal wedding ring saved my hand/fingers from being slammed in a car door.
Ended up with a little bruising rather than mincemeat.
So I'm pro-metal wedding ring precisely because it acted as a safety device.
There is fairly good evidence that the vast majority of people who make a big change in their life are happy with their decision 6 months later.
That is, it's better to make the change, than to not make the change.
So, when you do make the decision to walk away from the money, the chances are you will be happy that you made the decision to do so.
FWIW, our family did something similar, and while we remember that period of milk and honey reasonably fondly, we are all pretty glad that it's in the past.
The stress is just too much to continue it over the longer term.
And - in the end, the money didn't make that big a difference anyhow, as world events 100% out of our control intervened.