lelio's recent activity

  1. Comment on "Americans get screwed because they can’t read" in ~society

    lelio
    Link Parent
    Half baked idea: What if we had laws that had to have less than 100 words, or 500, or whatever is short enough that millions of voters will be willing to read the whole thing through. But, you...

    Half baked idea:
    What if we had laws that had to have less than 100 words, or 500, or whatever is short enough that millions of voters will be willing to read the whole thing through.
    But, you could have unlimited footnotes assigned to each word defining and adding context and logistical guidelines. These sections could be written at whatever reading level and length necessary to be precise.

    The main text though, would have to at least make sense without the foot notes, and convey the true impact of the benefits and drawbacks of the law bill in laymen's terms.

    The bill could be available online with links on the notes, like a wiki.

    1 vote

  2. Comment on Conformity and contrarianism at the same time in ~talk

    lelio
    Link
    I think I'm often seen as contrarian. I think of it more as being a skeptic. I feel like it's important to recognize our ignorance and the complexity of human civilization. So if someone says...

    I think I'm often seen as contrarian.

    I think of it more as being a skeptic. I feel like it's important to recognize our ignorance and the complexity of human civilization. So if someone says something like "The American financial system was designed to keep lower class people as wage slaves". I may disagree. It's more complicated, institutional memory, mission creep, corruption, etc. Most likely, no one person or group mindfully designed the American financial system.

    But if someone says something like: "The current system seems to make it difficult to escape wage slavery". I'll just think: "True that." Maybe vote and move on.

    This might seem inconsistent. But to me it's because I think it's really important to approach problems without any misconceptions or biases. If our system was designed by evil actors than the solution would be a much easier one of just finding and stopping those people. Instead I think we actually have to do the hard work of designing and implementing a fair economic system.

    I picked American economics at random. But Its the same for me with any issue. I'm more likely to push back against people I generally agree with who are making unproductive assumptions, because I want "my team" to be well informed and thinking clearly about how to move forward. Often that may seem like I'm just nitpicking something to argue about.

    11 votes

  3. Comment on The case against California Proposition 36 in ~society

    lelio
    Link Parent
    That seems hyperbolic to me. There is a difference between murder and selling something that people willingly buy. If there is fraud or coercion involved then that crosses a moral line for me. but...

    they're directly responsible for the daily murder of 2~3 San Franciscans and the immiseration of many more.

    That seems hyperbolic to me. There is a difference between murder and selling something that people willingly buy. If there is fraud or coercion involved then that crosses a moral line for me. but I don't think that is always the case in selling drugs.

    More than 100k people a year die from alcohol disease related deaths in the US. There is a whole industry of people making, selling, and distributing alcohol. It is even worse than illegal drugs because they have huge marketing budgets that could be seen as a mild form of fraud or coercion. But I don't consider all bartenders murderers.

    People die from car accidents, people commit suicide using tools others sold to them. All our actions have ripple effects and unwanted consequences that are difficult to account for, especially when we are panicked and just trying to survive.

    I feel it would work better if we used the government to focus on helping everyone be safe and financially secure by providing goods and services funded by tax dollars. Rather than using the government to punish whoever we think is at fault.

    2 votes

  4. Comment on Advice for dealing with racist/pro-Donald Trump family? in ~health.mental

    lelio
    Link Parent
    I think you were being kind and trying to empathize when you said: It struck me that I can't feel that at all. Maybe I'm the outlier here, but nothing about my gender or body characteristics feels...

    I think you were being kind and trying to empathize when you said:

    the mere thought of losing intrinsic body characteristics that you identify with, that make you you, is a pretty good indicator you aren't any flavor of non-binary and certainly not transgendered.

    It struck me that I can't feel that at all. Maybe I'm the outlier here, but nothing about my gender or body characteristics feels like an intrinsic part of my identity. If I could easily press a button and change my bodies sex, I would probably do it. Just to experience something different and get a new perspective. But I feel like it wouldn't fundamentally change who I am. Mostly it would just change the way people treat me.

    I support trans people. In general if someone wants to do something that badly we should let them and help them when we can.

    But I also struggle to connect with some trans people. For very different reasons than you were saying.

    I've always felt like gender was a social construct; like race, or star signs. Biological sex is a real thing, some people can make eggs, some people can fertilize them. Then there are associated statistical correlations in hormones, muscle mass, body shape etc. but on an individual level there is such a wide range within each sex that it seems pointless to differentiate between them unless we are specifically dealing with reproduction or health issues.

    In "Come as you are" by Emily Nagoski. She makes the point that men are on average around 4 inches taller than women. But if you get 100 random men and look at their heights there will probably a much larger range, likely at least 12". And obviously there are plenty of examples of women who are taller than men. So I feel like there is no reason to consider gender when dealing with height. I think it's the same for most of the traits that society tries to split the genders into.

    Since I was young, I always felt like it was silly how segregated by gender our society is. Why do we need different words, different bathrooms, etc. it feels like it just limits us.

    From that perspective I especially support trans people because I feel like every controversial issue that gets brought up around trans people highlights how flawed and ridiculous our segregated society is. Just have one bathroom for everyone! Problem solved!

    It feels like trans people are going through so much struggle and I think in the end their hardship and bravery will be a benefit to us all. Making our civilization more diverse and open. Which I think increases our resiliency and potential overall.

    My problem is when I hear some trans people say things like 'I am a woman born in a man's body'. I just can't understand what they mean. How can you feel like you are a gender? I'm not saying they are wrong. But I have never experienced any kind of gender identity that I can feel internally, like something that is intrinsic to me beyond physical appearance.

    I look like a man, so society treats me like man. When people assume things about me because of my gender or make some comment about how Im not conforming to my gender. Im mostly amused or at worst mildly annoyed. I'm lucky enough that I can live with that and it doesn't cause me any significant stress or feeling of wrongness. I can understand that some people want to dress, speak or act in ways that society won't accept unless they look like a certain sex. And that makes their life very difficult. That sucks and we should change, everyone should feel comfortable to live their life however they want and their sex shouldn't be a factor. You shouldn't have to choose a gender at all. What if you want to talk "like a man" but dress "like a woman"? Even asking that question seems to illustrate how pointless gender is.

    But when you say I AM X gender even though I was born with the opposite sexual organs, isn't that just buying into and reinforcing the social construct that is gender?

    Do they really feel so confident that there is a switch in their head that is definitely switched to one or the other? Or is it a defense mechanism? Is saying 'I am this gender' just easier than trying to explain they want to act in a certain way that society won't let them?

    I struggle to understand a thing that is thankfully deconstructing gender, yet at the same time seems to be obsessed with gender and basing peoples identity on it.

    Sorry to dump all that on you but I think it's been bouncing around in my head needing to be put into words and your comment jostled it out.

    6 votes

  5. Comment on You're running for office on a somewhat petty, yet univerally-understood single issue. What is it? in ~talk

    lelio
    Link
    In the States, I would run for President with the express purpose of limiting the power of the President. I think the president should be someone who can keep a cool head in a crisis. When time is...

    In the States, I would run for President with the express purpose of limiting the power of the President.

    I think the president should be someone who can keep a cool head in a crisis. When time is critical they can make quick short term decisions to handle natural disasters, national defense, etc. any executive orders should be for emergencies only and expire after a set time period, maybe a month. Then Congress has to extend them or take other actions.

    I don't think Presidents should set policy at all. They should be boring administrators, or at best guidance and leadership to help Congress set policy.

    As president I would encourage Congress to set restrictions on what executive orders can do and how long they can be in effect. I would promise to sign any laws passed that restricted my power.

    5 votes

  6. Comment on If you could send someone to any historic moment, who and when? in ~talk

    lelio
    Link
    I would send the last great "human" scientist(hopefully someone born millennia from now, but who knows?) back to Berkeley in 1960. For some reason I hesitate to send that knowledge back before...

    I would send the last great "human" scientist(hopefully someone born millennia from now, but who knows?) back to Berkeley in 1960.

    For some reason I hesitate to send that knowledge back before world war 2. Even though there is so much suffering, it just seems like so much could go wrong and I can't think of anywhere we can just drop them and trust that they will be taken care of and used wisely.

    So, If possible, I would specifically place them near Carl Sagan. Like, Sagan is sitting, eating his lunch and poof! Future scientist appears in his office.

    Hopefully they would find a way to communicate and have a nice long chat and maybe work on some projects together. Sagan is first to mind as someone that can communicate science brilliantly and seems thoughtful enough to make tough calls on how much to tell people and what ideas and technologies would be safe and of benefit to humans at that point.

    If I don't blink out of existence or have my memory altered immediately after, then I can at least watch cosmos and see if anything seems different.

    10 votes

  7. Comment on Fridge leaks water, pooling up... What do? in ~life.home_improvement

    lelio
    Link
    Another vote for: "check the drain hose" . Mine clogs up often and causes the bottom of the freezer to fill up with ice similar to this.

    Another vote for: "check the drain hose" .
    Mine clogs up often and causes the bottom of the freezer to fill up with ice similar to this.

    1 vote

  8. Comment on What do you actually do at work? in ~life

    lelio
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    I'm a freelance industrial technician. Factories in my area will contact me when their equipment breaks and there is no official support channel from the manufacturer. I either give them free tech...

    I'm a freelance industrial technician. Factories in my area will contact me when their equipment breaks and there is no official support channel from the manufacturer. I either give them free tech support, refer them to someone who knows better, or I schedule a service visit. I bill $200 an hour to drive to their facility and work on the problem until they get up and running again.

    Sometimes, I just find an estop button that everyone forgot about but got tripped somehow. Sometimes I have to rebuild a spindle or replace a servo drive. Sometimes I get to modify or retrofit old machines with newer tech, or better design to suit what they are trying to do with it.

    I'm happy if I average between 20-30 billable hours a week. It's hard work and I eventually burn out if I do much more.
    I have a very flexible, but chaotic and stressful schedule. It can be really satisfying to fix stuff and be a hero, but its pretty intense sometimes. I'm working on transitioning or at least diversifying into other stuff over the next few years.

    8 votes

  9. Comment on Getting started with intermittent reward as a motivation tactic in ~health.mental

    lelio
    Link
    ;)

    The rewards they administer should be something that you cannot just give yourself.

    ;)

    2 votes

  10. Comment on How do you avoid the "getting started" loop? in ~talk

    lelio
    Link
    I've embraced my tendency to procrastinate by planning. It can actually help with many types of tasks. I don't think there is a perfect way to do anything though. So I don't have a mind set of "I...
    1. I've embraced my tendency to procrastinate by planning.

    It can actually help with many types of tasks. I don't think there is a perfect way to do anything though. So I don't have a mind set of "I will do this when I have a perfect plan".

    Instead I think: I really don't want to do this right now, and I don't even know where to start. So I make a Google doc or something, I get very specific and have a numbered list of steps. I do research and write the steps as if I am writing them for a child. I revise and simplify and reread the instructions. Eventually I am more excited and antsy to get started than I am scared. Then I just follow the steps, its usually easy as there are no more decisions to be made, no executive function necessary.

    Like you mentioned, I have to avoid the trap of buying some gadget to use. It's always tempting and sometimes it makes sense. But usually it's just an excuse to get that dopamine hit of buying a thing, plus I often have to wait for it to come, which helps me delay actually starting the task.
    If I'm tempted I write down a strategy with and without the gadget so I can get an idea of how much it really helps.

    Like for example if you want to do streaming you may be tempted to buy equipment. You can write that into your plan. First write up how to do it with the bare minimum of stuff you already have. Then have a step like: "After I have streamed 5 sessions revisit my equipment based on my experience so far".

    Overall I think documenting things is key for me. If I try to plan in my head I can go in circles forever and never get anything done. If I type I all out then every time I come back to that task I can make small forward progress.

    1. With some tasks, like exercise or cleaning, anything where you are trying to change your habits, you just have to start by doing the smallest chunk of work possible. Exactly like Wafik said in his post.

    2. I suspect everyone is faking it at least a little. No one's life is as well put together as it seems from the outside. Just keep working and learning. Don't be so hard on yourself.

    1 vote

  11. Comment on Non-parents give crappy parenting advice in ~life

    lelio
    Link Parent
    The main thing I've learned from my parenting experience is that parenting is hard because it is a marathon, not a chess match. I went into it terrified because humans are so complicated and I...

    The main thing I've learned from my parenting experience is that parenting is hard because it is a marathon, not a chess match.

    I went into it terrified because humans are so complicated and I thought I would have to be making all these intense moral calculations. I wasn't sure if I understood human nature well enough to make the right calls.

    It's true, parents do have to make those decisions. But I've found that I do much more damage to my kids not when I make the wrong decision, but when I am too tired or emotionally unregulated to act in the way that I know I should. I think most people can be smart enough and make decent decisions about parenting when they are in the right mindset.

    The reason we are such bad parents is because we have to be patient and playful while having no sleep. We have to be kind and loving while our children are being assholes, regularly physically and emotionally attacking us, everyday. Having the same argument, over the same ridiculous demands over and over again: "I don't want dinner, I want candy". it's cute the first 10-20 times and an opportunity to explain nutrition, health, etc. But when you have to have that conversation every night, with the same person screaming at you, for years, It gets old and you slip up and get mad, which makes the situation worse.

    I know it's not their fault. I know that the only way to resolve a meltdown is to be calm and patient and help them regulate their emotions. But sometimes I just can't. How do you force yourself to be calm? Even if I pretend to be calm, and speak slowly and say the right things, my kids know when I am upset and it makes them freak out.

    For me, I feel like I know how to be a good parent, the same way I know how to win a marathon, just keep running as fast as you can. It's actually making myself do it that is the challenge.

    Its a hard slog. My best strategies are honesty and communication. I'm lucky enough to have a partner, so we tag out whenever one of us is just done.

    8 votes

  12. Comment on <deleted topic> in ~talk

    lelio
    Link Parent
    I am a huge fan of manual transmissions, and won't buy an automatic. When I bought a Tacoma for a work truck, I flew to Oregon to pick up a manual and drove it back to Los Angeles because they...

    I am a huge fan of manual transmissions, and won't buy an automatic. When I bought a Tacoma for a work truck, I flew to Oregon to pick up a manual and drove it back to Los Angeles because they don't sell manual Tacoma's in California.

    But with an EV, it basically is a manual. Because there is only one gear, the motor is connected directly to the wheels. You don't have the mushy feel of a torque converter or the random timing of a hydraulic actuated shifter.
    The question of power/"engine" braking is all a matter of software.

    The way it works on my EV(Kia EV6) is there are paddles behind the steering wheel, the left one makes it "feel" like you are in a lower gear and the right one, a higher gear. There are 4 levels. Basically it just makes the vehicle use regenerative braking more aggressively at each level. I.think it also makes acceleration more responsive but it's not that noticeable. In the max level it is a one pedal mode where you can come to a complete stop by just lifting off the acceleration pedal.

    I drive in max level almost always unless I'm in cruise control. It's great, it basically feels like being at peak high rpm all the time, without using a clutch or shifting. And it's not hard on the engine or your gas milage!

    You can take your foot off the pedal right before a 20mph curve and it will shift weight hard on to the front wheels, then be ready to deliver full power the instant you step on it. Then you can do the exact same thing on the next curve without shifting, even if it is a 50mph curve. The whole thing feels really smooth, responsive, and tight. It's honestly more fun to drive than any manual sports car I've driven.

    2 votes

  13. Comment on Has sexual content invaded too much of the internet? in ~tech

    lelio
    Link
    I think there are two separate issues. In my opinion sex is a normal healthy part of life and im fine with it being on any platform. Anecdotally, Ive felt that there is less sex in popular culture...

    I think there are two separate issues.

    In my opinion sex is a normal healthy part of life and im fine with it being on any platform. Anecdotally, Ive felt that there is less sex in popular culture lately, or it's less gratuitous. In pop music, movies, and the internet too. At least as compared to the 90s and 00s.

    On the other hand the Internet continues to become more driven by algorithms that will use anything, including sex, but also outrage, envy, etc. to get peoples attention. This is the larger issue, as I see it. I'd like to see more thoughtful, authentic content of all kinds, including sexual content. But I don't know how we incentivise that kind of content.

    9 votes

  14. Comment on You don’t need a pickup truck, you need a cowboy costume in ~transport

    lelio
    Link Parent
    I needed a work truck I can put a utility bed on and a decent amount of weight. I have to load and unload tools from it most work days. I wanted a 2004 type Tacoma so bad! But it ended up making...

    I needed a work truck I can put a utility bed on and a decent amount of weight. I have to load and unload tools from it most work days. I wanted a 2004 type Tacoma so bad!

    But it ended up making more financial sense to buy a brand new 2019 model. It was barely more expensive since the old ones are in so much demand. Plus I wanted something that would look professional. But the new ones are huge and no one sells anything smaller! So frustrating.

    1 vote

  15. I’m falling in love with the Revelation Space universe

    ~books Ask
    Warning: this post may contain spoilers

    I want to ramble about Alastair Reynolds' Revelation Space series/universe. I will avoid spoilers.

    So far, I have read:

    "The Prefect" 2007
    "Revelation Space" 2000
    "Chasm City" 2001
    "The Great Wall of Mars" (Novella) 2000
    "Glacial" (Novella) 2001 (I haven't finished this yet.)

    I’m an occasional listener to “The Sword and Laser,” a book club/podcast where they read a book each month and discuss it, alternating between sci-fi and fantasy. I usually don't read the books, just enjoy the conversations, but if the early discussions sound interesting, I will read it before I get to the spoilery episodes.

    One such case was when they read ‘The Prefect’ in 2021. I had heard of Alastair Reynolds and Revelation Space and had considered reading him before. If I remember correctly, they said it was a good way to dip your toe in the universe with a story that takes place in it but isn't really connected to the main series, so it doesn't spoil much.

    I liked ‘The Prefect’ but didn't love it. It was set in this huge, complicated universe but had this small noir detective-type character we were following. It felt like seeing a narrow flashlight beam, aiming into an opaque mist of stuff that I couldn't quite make out.
    I liked many of the little pieces floating around the universe, but I didn't quite trust that it was real and would have internal consistency.

    I saw “Pushing Ice” (an Alastair Reynolds book that is unrelated to Revelation Space) recommended somewhere late last year and decided to try it. I loved it, even though the ending left so much unanswered that it was disappointing. I can see how it may make sense to do that for some stories. Still, I have this distrust of the author's intent sometimes. If it feels like they are including mysterious background info without any thought of how it all connects, it bothers me. Even if the story or characters are good, it is distracting. I'm afraid of getting a "Lost" or "Game of Thrones" type ending where I don't feel like all the threads paid off or had any real purpose. To be clear, "Pushing Ice" was nothing like those endings. I feel like it earned its story. It just didn't fill in the universe as much as I wanted. I still didn't fully trust Reynolds as an author.

    A few months ago, I decided to try the first proper book in the series, “Revelation Space”. I was surprised to see that I already owned it on Kindle. The first chapter was very familiar. I had bought it in 2013! As I read, I remembered I had gotten bored back then and left the book after a chapter or 2 to read something else. The beginning was a little boring. Again, it's set in a world I don't know and I'm not sure if I care about. In this book though, the perspective changes often. Multiple points of view seem to help me triangulate the world. It takes half the book, but I eventually fully buy-in, and then the world seems incredibly full. References to unknown factions, historical events, religions, movements, etc. They all feel like real plausible things with their own potential histories. Instead of the misty, non-tangible fluff, they seemed like when I read "The Prefect" or the first part of this book.

    I finished “Revelation Space” completely satisfied and excited to dive into the series. I did a little research and found there are a lot of options for reading order. At this point I’m fairly certain I want to read every book in the series, so I am not too concerned with reading order, I just want to find a fun way to keep the things fresh as I explore it. I decided to read “Chasm City” next as it seems like the next thing in terms of publication date.

    "Chasm City" was great! It followed the same pattern for me, with the beginning and the main character being the most boring parts of the book. But by the end, I felt like I knew the universe better and saw a bunch of interesting, fun stuff along the way.

    I then read “The Great Wall” a quick novella that was awesome! It tells an origin story for something that has been mentioned but left ambiguous in all the other books. So satisfying.

    I started reading another novella, “Glacial” today. So far, I'm really curious, but not sure what it's about.

    The Great Wall reminded me of a book I read probably twenty years ago, “Hellstroms Hive” by Frank Herbert. I can't remember the details, and I think I may reread it now to take a break and make sure I won't burn out on Revelation Space. After that, I think I’ll jump right back in with “Redemption Ark” the next main novel in the series, which I believe follows the story of the novella I'm reading now.

    Unless someone else has a better suggestion for what to read next in the revelation space universe? I've already bought the “Galactic North” collection to read those two novellas. But Im not sure if I should read any of the others until after I read further in the main novel series.

    Any other opinions on revelation space?

    18 votes

  16. Comment on <deleted topic> in ~life

    lelio
    Link Parent
    If we rely on people to choose to be a "contributing (rather than extractive) member of society" then someone less thoughtful will simply take their place. I would prefer we structure our society...

    If we rely on people to choose to be a "contributing (rather than extractive) member of society" then someone less thoughtful will simply take their place.
    I would prefer we structure our society in such a way that rewards constructive actions and dissuades extractive strategies.
    Their suggestion of a tax structure seems to be a good faith suggestion of how that might be done.

    1 vote

  17. Comment on TDK claims insane energy density in solid-state battery breakthrough in ~tech

    lelio
    Link
    The non solid state Batteries in current EVs are around 600-700 Wh/L. So 1000 Wh/L is impressive, but I wouldn't call it "insane". I guess it's insane for solid state batteries, which have some...

    The non solid state Batteries in current EVs are around 600-700 Wh/L.
    So 1000 Wh/L is impressive, but I wouldn't call it "insane".
    I guess it's insane for solid state batteries, which have some advantages, like a longer life.

    6 votes

  18. Comment on Science fiction or fantasy recommendations for children in ~books

    lelio
    Link Parent
    Maybe you were reading the S Morgenstern version? I heard that one is kind of boring ;)

    Maybe you were reading the S Morgenstern version? I heard that one is kind of boring ;)

    3 votes

  19. Comment on Science fiction or fantasy recommendations for children in ~books

    lelio
    Link
    Oh! I got an obscure but fun fav of mine: Villains by Necessity Hopefully you can use a kindle or a library, as it's unfortunately hard to find in print right now. But I thought of it because you...

    Oh! I got an obscure but fun fav of mine:

    Villains by Necessity

    Hopefully you can use a kindle or a library, as it's unfortunately hard to find in print right now.

    But I thought of it because you said she was tired of happy endings. Here is a short synopsis I saw:

    Proving that even in Utopia some people are oppressed, the leftover "bad guys" from the triumph of Good and Light--thieves, a black knight, a vengeful, man-eating sorceress--attempt to save the world from the terrible fate of boredom

    Maybe read some reviews with her and see if it's something she'd be interested in.

    My take is that It reads like a satirical sequel to the Lord of the rings. It has a little heart without taking itself too seriously, its quite funny, with a Princess Bride vibe(which is also a great fantasy book to read with your kids, I have!)

    2 votes

  20. Comment on How late is too late for a house party? in ~talk

    lelio
    Link Parent
    I think I've heard some Springsteen, Jesse's girl, etc. I was thinking of music from the 70s and 80s but not like punk or new wave, just the stuff that was popular among boomers I guess? Maybe...

    I think I've heard some Springsteen, Jesse's girl, etc. I was thinking of music from the 70s and 80s but not like punk or new wave, just the stuff that was popular among boomers I guess? Maybe even the Beatles and other classic rock.

    I didn't mean it to be derogatory btw, I have room for boomer rock in my life ;)

    3 votes