20 votes

Tipping in the 21st century? Arguments for. Arguments against.

The custom of tipping your server dates back to the mid-1800's. 150 years later, it seems that tipping is less customary, and has become entrenched in the service industry.

Some view tipping as a positive. People may feel compelled to give their server 'something extra' for extraordinary service, and tipping gives them that option. They might also say that a tip provides extra motivation for the server to do a better job. From the perspective of the server, they may even feel enticed to pursue employment where tips are readily available as it could supplement their income.

Opposers of tipping often feel that employers should offer a 'living wage' to their servers instead of relying on their clientele to 'make up the difference.' Sociological critics have also noticed that physically attractive servers might get larger tips, regardless of the quality of service they provide, thus negating the "motivation" argument. Again, from the perspective of a server, they might also not wish to pursue a job that forces them to rely on tips as their income may fluctuate from month-to-month, making it difficult to budget accordingly.

These are just some of the most common arguments for and against tipping. I'm curious as to what you all think!

40 comments

  1. [9]
    arghdos
    Link
    Honestly, if you know enough servers as friends and see/hear all the absolutely reprehensible shit they are forced to endure due to piss-poor excuses for human beings known as customers, you will...

    Honestly, if you know enough servers as friends and see/hear all the absolutely reprehensible shit they are forced to endure due to piss-poor excuses for human beings known as customers, you will know that tipping is not optional -- hence, I tip 20% by default.

    I would listen to an argument about changing the practice such that servers were paid fairly to begin with, but in the US that simply isn't the case.

    12 votes
    1. [6]
      PlatoLake
      Link Parent
      This is a truly unique problem for the US. Many places in Europe do not have tipping in the same sense the US does. I have never experienced poor service because a server isn't "working" for a tip...

      I would listen to an argument about changing the practice such that servers were paid fairly to begin with, but in the US that simply isn't the case.

      This is a truly unique problem for the US. Many places in Europe do not have tipping in the same sense the US does. I have never experienced poor service because a server isn't "working" for a tip when traveling in Europe. The waiter simply does their job. The US food service industry should be required by law to pay their workers minimum wage (before tips). Tipping should be for service that goes above and beyond the "normal". I shouldn't have to subsidize a servers income because the management/owners refuse to pay what all other jobs are required to.

      That being said, I still tip waiters appropriately but only because I know that their hourly rate is only ~2/hour and so I feel obligated to "do the right thing". Unfortunately the culture is so ingrained I doubt it will change before robots take over...

      9 votes
      1. [4]
        RapidEyeMovement
        Link Parent
        I experience bad service all the time in Europe. And by bad service I don't mean rude, incompetent or bumbling service or anything like that. I mean that if I need something it takes FOREVER for...

        I experience bad service all the time in Europe.

        And by bad service I don't mean rude, incompetent or bumbling service or anything like that. I mean that if I need something it takes FOREVER for the server to get back to our table because they have more tables/guest then they can handle. Most restaurants have less servers per guest then their US counter part.

        Trying to get the check or another beer or anything like that takes twice as long in Europe as it does in the US. They just don't have time to be as attentive.

        The interesting counter point to this is my European friends can sometimes be weirded-out by over attentive/friendly servers, they also feel that they are hurried through the meal as compared to Europe, but they generally admit the overall service is much better in the US.

        2 votes
        1. [3]
          Archimedes
          Link Parent
          It's not necessarily worse service (though it often is), but it certainly is different. If you're the type that likes the server to bring your food and leave you alone to enjoy a leisurely dinner,...

          It's not necessarily worse service (though it often is), but it certainly is different. If you're the type that likes the server to bring your food and leave you alone to enjoy a leisurely dinner, then European style is great. If you expect frequent attention or are in a hurry to get your check and leave, then it's not so great.

          Most of the time I really don't need a server checking up on me or asking if I want a to-go cup of water, so I'd usually prefer the European style. On the other hand, it can be maddening trying to get the check when you've got to leave to be somewhere on time.

          3 votes
          1. [2]
            RapidEyeMovement
            Link Parent
            I don't disagree, but the number of times I've been left wanting another cool Aperol Spritz in the heat of the day may color my memory. Also US establishments are maximized for price per guest,...

            I don't disagree, but the number of times I've been left wanting another cool Aperol Spritz in the heat of the day may color my memory.

            Also US establishments are maximized for price per guest, Europeans restaurants are maximized for number of tables per space.

            1 vote
            1. Archimedes
              Link Parent
              Drinks are my least favorite part of dining in Europe. I'm used to having bottomless refills of water/soda/tea and usually go through several large glasses. In Europe, when you ask for water you...

              Drinks are my least favorite part of dining in Europe. I'm used to having bottomless refills of water/soda/tea and usually go through several large glasses. In Europe, when you ask for water you might get a 0.33L bottle of sparkling mineral water for a couple Euros. I can't afford to buy like 4 of those every meal. Just give me some ice and a pitcher of tap water!

              3 votes
      2. Fiestaman
        Link Parent
        I mean, I had horrible service in France, but I guess that's just par for the course over there.

        I mean, I had horrible service in France, but I guess that's just par for the course over there.

        2 votes
    2. 8thwaitress
      (edited )
      Link Parent
      Amen. Waiting on tables/foodservice isn't the best way to make a living: essentially, you are someone's temporary servant, but, you also have another boss (the restaurant). It can totally suck....

      Amen.

      Waiting on tables/foodservice isn't the best way to make a living: essentially, you are someone's temporary servant, but, you also have another boss (the restaurant). It can totally suck. And it usually does, for most folk, sadly.

      If you want to make someone's day, over-tip them. Especially if they are working hard and very pleasant. It is very hard work, on the body and on the soul.

      Don't get me wrong, there are a lot of people in difficult workplaces-- the kitchen staff are killing it, too, usually, and underpaid for it. But, at least in the U.S., because of the rules around tipped employees, restaurants pay them less, so a tip is part of a server's wage.

      I try to always overtip, just to make up for the asshats, skinflints, ignorant, and also just to make people feel good. It's a nice thing to feel another human being, especially a stranger, is just plain being kind and appreciative.

      4 votes
    3. spctrvl
      Link Parent
      Saaaaaame. I really, really hate tipping as it's done in the US, an essentially mandatory non-listed service charge that forces customers to foot the bill for the restaurant's labor and lets bad...

      Saaaaaame. I really, really hate tipping as it's done in the US, an essentially mandatory non-listed service charge that forces customers to foot the bill for the restaurant's labor and lets bad customers be as abusive towards the wait staff as they like because they're granted power over the staff's wages. Like, who thought that was in any way a good idea? Not someone who worked in customer service a day in their lives. But the only thing I would accomplish by not tipping is fucking over some poor server trying to make a living, so I can't opt out of the system. It's maddening.

      3 votes
  2. [2]
    rodya
    Link
    Tipping shouldn't exist, or at the very least should be reserved for truly exceptional service. However since it makes up such a large portion of servers' income, tipping is really a requirement...

    Tipping shouldn't exist, or at the very least should be reserved for truly exceptional service. However since it makes up such a large portion of servers' income, tipping is really a requirement regardless of the service quality.

    12 votes
    1. Gyrfalcon
      Link Parent
      This is how I feel, too. If it were up to me, servers would have to make minimum wage, and then exceptional service could result in a tip. On the topic of tipping, I know that Uber and Lyft at...

      This is how I feel, too. If it were up to me, servers would have to make minimum wage, and then exceptional service could result in a tip.

      On the topic of tipping, I know that Uber and Lyft at first did not offer tipping, and then later added it. I wish they hadn't, because the draw to me of those services over a regular taxi was a flat rate without feeling the need to tip.

      2 votes
  3. Algernon_Asimov
    Link
    I'm an Aussie. Tipping is not a standard part of our culture because we expect that our servers are being paid a decent minimum wage, as per our industrial relations laws. There are some cases...

    I'm an Aussie. Tipping is not a standard part of our culture because we expect that our servers are being paid a decent minimum wage, as per our industrial relations laws. There are some cases where some restaurateurs and café owners and other employers in the service industry underpay their employees, but these are (theoretically) the exception rather than the rule - and, if these cases come to light, they tend to generate a lot of negative publicity for those businesses.

    But, in general, we don't tip.

    There are a few exceptions.

    • Some small service businesses might have a "tip jar" on the counter, and some customers might drop a few coins in the jar. But it's usually only a token amount.

    • Occasionally, a customer will say "keep the change" (if they're paying by cash) or "round it up" (if they're paying by card). For example: a bill for $18.75 might be paid as $20.00.

    • In very high-class expensive establishments, the customer might show some largesse.

    But tipping is not a standard practice here. We don't have to apply a fixed 10% or 15% to a bill when paying it. We don't need to.

    I don't think that hospitality employees should be forced to rely on tips for their income. It is the employer's responsibility to pay their employees, not the customers'. The employer can and should pass the cost on to their customers in the price of their products, just like they do with other costs of the business. If the employer is underpaying their employees, that's just a dodgy way of avoiding taxes and other employment entitlements. And forcing servers to effectively grovel to customers in order to earn tips is demeaning.

    10 votes
  4. Diet_Coke
    (edited )
    Link
    I don't like it. Tipping encourages abuse of servers. Assholes get away with some really offcolor behavior, because they control a server's pay. Also when someone doesn't tip, it usually means...

    I don't like it.

    Tipping encourages abuse of servers. Assholes get away with some really offcolor behavior, because they control a server's pay. Also when someone doesn't tip, it usually means that the server is paying to work there because of the way the minimum wage laws work.

    Restaurant owners don't have to pay servers hardly anything which lets them charge a lower menu price, which makes it harder for a restaurant to get off the tip system. This also lets them make servers do non-tipped side work at the tipped minimum wage.

    Tipping means that people who do tip (and the servers themselves) subsidize the bad actors that don't tip.

    With all that, I don't see any real benefit to the tipping system. It would be better if every restaurant had to stop the tip system at the same time, raise their prices 20 - 30%, and pay their employees more equitably. The only people this would hurt are non-tippers (fuck them), and restauranteurs who can only run a business by paying starvation wages to their employees (fuck them too).

    9 votes
  5. [4]
    Comment deleted by author
    Link
    1. [3]
      DtheS
      Link Parent
      Very true. In North America, I would assume there would be some stigma in advertising "Don't tip our servers! We pay them enough!" (Which, funny enough, in Japan and some European countries, they...

      Very true. In North America, I would assume there would be some stigma in advertising "Don't tip our servers! We pay them enough!" (Which, funny enough, in Japan and some European countries, they actually do advertise this!) Regardless, the point I am trying to make is, it is difficult to demonstrate to consumers that while they pay more on the menu, they will make up the difference in a lack of leaving a tip.

      1 vote
      1. devlinium
        Link Parent
        In Japan, tipping someone is considered an offense, as you're indicating that they clearly need the extra income to improve their inadequate services. (So I'm told!)

        In Japan, tipping someone is considered an offense, as you're indicating that they clearly need the extra income to improve their inadequate services. (So I'm told!)

        1 vote
      2. Gaywallet
        Link Parent
        There's actually an extremely successful restaurant chain that does not allow you to tip the servers. Given, this is in new york city in times square, so it's a bit of a different environment, but...

        There's actually an extremely successful restaurant chain that does not allow you to tip the servers.

        Given, this is in new york city in times square, so it's a bit of a different environment, but it's possible to do.

  6. cheesegrits
    Link
    I think a lot of people in the US, and especially visitors, don't realize that the federal minimum wage for tipped workers is only $2.13/hour. While technically the employer is also obliged to...

    I think a lot of people in the US, and especially visitors, don't realize that the federal minimum wage for tipped workers is only $2.13/hour. While technically the employer is also obliged to make up the difference if the employee's combined earnings don't meet the $7.25/hour regular minimum wage, that rarely happens. And while some states set their own minimums (like California, which sets tipped and non tipped the same), many don't. I live in a state which doesn't set its own minimum, and I have a lot of friends who wait tables and tend bar.

    So while one can debate whether tipping should be a thing, for about half the wait staff in the US, it's the only way they survive.

    The wait staff I know well enough to know how they handle taxes all declare a reasonable chunk of their tips.

    3 votes
  7. demifiend
    Link
    I tip 20% by default because restaurant workers honestly don't get paid enough to deal with this bullshit. I also rate five stars by default. However, I resent the necessity of tipping because...

    I tip 20% by default because restaurant workers honestly don't get paid enough to deal with this bullshit. I also rate five stars by default. However, I resent the necessity of tipping because labor laws in the US don't adequately protect workers, and allow restaurants to underpay waitstaff on the assumption that customers like me will make up the difference.

    3 votes
  8. [19]
    OriginalBinChicken
    Link
    I'm a bit of an idealist on this topic. Some opinions on tipping in American culture from an American: If you ask for a tip, I'm purposely not going to give you one (this happens more than you...

    I'm a bit of an idealist on this topic. Some opinions on tipping in American culture from an American:

    • If you ask for a tip, I'm purposely not going to give you one (this happens more than you think)
    • Only tip in cash (no one should have to pay taxes on their tip money)
    • Always hand the money directly to the server/employee that you're awarding the tip to.
    • Businesses that force employees to pool their tips are shameful and don't deserve your business.

    EDIT: spelling

    2 votes
    1. [9]
      arghdos
      (edited )
      Link Parent
      I don't know that I understand the reasoning here, the chef, the bussers, the dishwashers... they all work hard to serve me food (even though I don't necessarily see them do it) and probably...

      Businesses that force employees to pool their tips are shameful and don't deserve your business.

      I don't know that I understand the reasoning here, the chef, the bussers, the dishwashers... they all work hard to serve me food (even though I don't necessarily see them do it) and probably deserve some share of that tip as well.

      4 votes
      1. [8]
        OriginalBinChicken
        Link Parent
        The tip is meant for the individual in the customer facing role. Service is the name of the game and pooling tips creates an environment of laziness and sub par customer experience. I agree that...

        The tip is meant for the individual in the customer facing role. Service is the name of the game and pooling tips creates an environment of laziness and sub par customer experience.

        I agree that chefs and bus boys do deserve financial reward too. In many cases, these individuals are working harder. But the origins of tipping indicate that tips are meant for the server.

        2 votes
        1. [7]
          Algernon_Asimov
          Link Parent
          But not pooling tips means the unseen workers feel left out and undervalued. While you might get sprightly service from the waiters bringing you the food, it might end up being sub-standard food...

          But not pooling tips means the unseen workers feel left out and undervalued. While you might get sprightly service from the waiters bringing you the food, it might end up being sub-standard food on dirty plates.

          When a waiter delivers a meal to your table, they're representing the entire establishment: the cook who made your food, the kitchenhand who washed your plate, the busser who cleared the dirty plates & glasses, the bartender who made your drink, and themself bringing you the completed meal. That meal represents a collective effort. Why is only one of the people who contributed to it (and, one could argue, a person who made one of the smallest contributions to the final product), entitled to a tip while everyone else is not?

          3 votes
          1. [6]
            OriginalBinChicken
            Link Parent
            So then the employer should pay the entire team more money... isn't that the main point here? I don't disagree with paying employees what they're worth! :)

            So then the employer should pay the entire team more money... isn't that the main point here?

            I don't disagree with paying employees what they're worth! :)

            1 vote
            1. [5]
              Algernon_Asimov
              Link Parent
              Yes, of course they should! I've already made that point. But in the USA, employers do not pay their employees enough. So when you tip at those establishments, you should tip the whole team that...

              So then the employer should pay the entire team more money

              Yes, of course they should! I've already made that point.

              But in the USA, employers do not pay their employees enough. So when you tip at those establishments, you should tip the whole team that contributed to your meal, not just the person who brought it to your table.

              1 vote
              1. [4]
                OriginalBinChicken
                Link Parent
                I don't agree. Tipping is meant to be an extra monetary reward for good service provided by the server. End of story.

                I don't agree. Tipping is meant to be an extra monetary reward for good service provided by the server. End of story.

                1. [3]
                  Algernon_Asimov
                  Link Parent
                  It is meant to be that, yes. However, in real life USA, hospitality staff have been screwed over by their employers and rely on those tips. While it might seem moral and principled to refuse to...

                  It is meant to be that, yes.

                  However, in real life USA, hospitality staff have been screwed over by their employers and rely on those tips. While it might seem moral and principled to refuse to tip those staff because tipping shouldn't be required, what you're actually doing is taking food out of those people's mouths and contributing to their poverty.

                  Fix the wages first, then get rid of tipping - not the other way round!

                  1 vote
                  1. [2]
                    OriginalBinChicken
                    Link Parent
                    I don't appreciate being accused of "taking food out of those people's mouths". I personally have done nothing to anyone and don't owe anyone anything. Please quit the accusations regarding a...

                    I don't appreciate being accused of "taking food out of those people's mouths". I personally have done nothing to anyone and don't owe anyone anything. Please quit the accusations regarding a cultural nuance that is specific to a foreign country to you. There are plenty of silly things Australians do that I'll never understand either but I'm not here accusing you of anything.

                    1. Algernon_Asimov
                      Link Parent
                      So you do tip hospitality employees - including the kitchen staff - when you eat out?

                      So you do tip hospitality employees - including the kitchen staff - when you eat out?

    2. [9]
      tildez
      Link Parent
      Why shouldn’t they have to pay income taxes on tips? Surely it is income, just an utterly backwards method of transfer.

      Why shouldn’t they have to pay income taxes on tips? Surely it is income, just an utterly backwards method of transfer.

      2 votes
      1. [8]
        OriginalBinChicken
        Link Parent
        I don't feel tips should be taxable. Servers are already making minimum wage in many cases, let them keep the money they worked hard for.

        I don't feel tips should be taxable. Servers are already making minimum wage in many cases, let them keep the money they worked hard for.

        1 vote
        1. [3]
          tildez
          Link Parent
          Sounds like a way to make a bad system even worse to me. Just shift the cost to the employer and charge more money for the product like every other service business. America is so weird.

          Sounds like a way to make a bad system even worse to me.

          Just shift the cost to the employer and charge more money for the product like every other service business. America is so weird.

          2 votes
          1. [2]
            OriginalBinChicken
            Link Parent
            I also agree with that. Tipping culture is one of the many weird things about the US. I'm just more apt to say that employees should be able to keep more of the money they worked hard for. I think...

            I also agree with that. Tipping culture is one of the many weird things about the US. I'm just more apt to say that employees should be able to keep more of the money they worked hard for. I think a lot of low income families would benefit immensely from a simple tax reduction on the low and low-middle income brackets.

            1. tildez
              Link Parent
              I definitely agree with you but creating a wacky tax loophole that will surely be abused doesn't solve the root of the problem. Pay them as if they are working a normal job. ezpz.

              I definitely agree with you but creating a wacky tax loophole that will surely be abused doesn't solve the root of the problem. Pay them as if they are working a normal job. ezpz.

        2. [4]
          Archimedes
          Link Parent
          Screw that. Your feelings don't dictate tax policy and I'm not going to carry around petty cash just so servers can cheat on their taxes.

          Screw that. Your feelings don't dictate tax policy and I'm not going to carry around petty cash just so servers can cheat on their taxes.

          1 vote
          1. [3]
            OriginalBinChicken
            Link Parent
            I guess I just cannot understand the desire to be taxed. Sure taxes are needed to keep the infrastructure up, keep the lights on, buses running, etc, but outside of that, I just don't understand...

            I guess I just cannot understand the desire to be taxed. Sure taxes are needed to keep the infrastructure up, keep the lights on, buses running, etc, but outside of that, I just don't understand people that vote for more taxes only to complain about how high taxes are when they see their pay checks.

            And it isn't cheating... the server earned that money, it's theirs.

            1. [2]
              Archimedes
              Link Parent
              I'm not saying I like to be taxed (though I do understand it to be necessary to a certain extent), but I'm not going to evade my own taxes or inconvenience myself to purposely help others evade...

              I'm not saying I like to be taxed (though I do understand it to be necessary to a certain extent), but I'm not going to evade my own taxes or inconvenience myself to purposely help others evade theirs.

              It's their money the same way anybody's work-related income is theirs and also carries the same obligation to pay taxes. I'm not sure where the idea that cash income should be exempt from taxation comes from.

              2 votes
              1. OriginalBinChicken
                Link Parent
                I'm not saying anyone should break any laws or evade taxes at all. I'm saying tips shouldn't be taxable. That isn't a call to action to break the law.

                I'm not saying anyone should break any laws or evade taxes at all. I'm saying tips shouldn't be taxable. That isn't a call to action to break the law.

  9. Catt
    Link
    I never minded tipping servers, as I've worked in the service industry before too and understands how the days can go. However, I'm starting to be prompt for tips everywhere, such as coffee shops...

    I never minded tipping servers, as I've worked in the service industry before too and understands how the days can go. However, I'm starting to be prompt for tips everywhere, such as coffee shops and take-out. That I don't like.

    I would prefer that we get rid of tipping altogether, except for exceptional cases.

    There were a couple restaurants that tried it in my city. They basically included a surcharge (basically a 13% tip, which is on the low side here) on every bill. Customers were warned of this before entering the restaurants and were of course, given the option of not paying it if they didn't like the service, but people hated it and boycotted the places. Most had to stop within a few months.

    2 votes
  10. CashewGuy
    Link
    I hate tipping. I think it's awful that waiters/waitresses don't get paid appropriately. I do tip, but I get annoyed at some things. There is a pizza company called Jet's that makes very good...

    I hate tipping.

    I think it's awful that waiters/waitresses don't get paid appropriately. I do tip, but I get annoyed at some things. There is a pizza company called Jet's that makes very good pizza. You know those delivery fees, that all say specifically "THIS IS NOT A TIP"? Their drivers get those fees, per their job listings, plus tips. This makes me feel like I shouldn't have to tip. When I go and pick up food, some places have a "tip" line - get out of here, I'm picking up food.

    I go to a diner a lot, and I overtip a little when I go. I get great service, I'm there very frequently, and I am almost to the point where I don't have to speak, they know what I want. I overtip because I genuinely appreciate this, and would probably do it anyway.

    I also have recently learned that people tip barbers. I went to the same barber for 15 years for a $10 haircut and there was never a hint of a tip, nor did I ever see anyone tip. I moved to a bigger town, and suddenly my haircut costs $18 and the guy asks, "How much do you want to add to that?" That really threw me off.

    A tip should be for exceptional service not substitute for employers not paying a living wage. Unfortunately, the reality in the US doesn't presently allow that. No discussion on the merit or practice of tipping is complete without this piece of somewhat offensive Reservoir Dogs writing.

    2 votes
  11. [2]
    Comment deleted by author
    Link
    1. Archimedes
      Link Parent
      Buffet: I'd only tip if there was someone taking care of drinks or if I wanted to leave something for the busser. Fast Food / Coffee Shops: Generally no tipping for service where the most they do...
      • Buffet: I'd only tip if there was someone taking care of drinks or if I wanted to leave something for the busser.

      • Fast Food / Coffee Shops: Generally no tipping for service where the most they do is bring you what you ordered at the counter.

      • Other: I do generally tip my barber.

      2 votes