lackofaname's recent activity
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Comment on Hi, how are you? Mental health support and discussion thread (April 2025) in ~health.mental
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Comment on What keeps you up at night? in ~talk
lackofaname Link ParentI'm 37, and it's so easy for me to feel old. But, I read a comment online the other day by someone stating they were 35, about where they were at, and for a brief moment, my brain completely...I'm 37, and it's so easy for me to feel old.
But, I read a comment online the other day by someone stating they were 35, about where they were at, and for a brief moment, my brain completely forgot about me, and I just thought "wow, you have so much to look forward to".
It took me a moment of self reflection to reconcile how I view myself, vs. this very similarly aged stranger.
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Comment on What are your goto cocktails? in ~food
lackofaname Link ParentOh, good point. I really love unsweetened grapefuit, so I wouldn't personally add sugar. But I'm sure it would also be very tasty with simple syrup to balance out any bitterness. If you wanted to...Oh, good point. I really love unsweetened grapefuit, so I wouldn't personally add sugar.
But I'm sure it would also be very tasty with simple syrup to balance out any bitterness. If you wanted to have fun with the syrup, you could even infuse the rosemary.
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Comment on Confess your food crimes in ~food
lackofaname Link ParentWhile I am a fan of pineapple on pizza, so bias, I particularly like pineapple and green olives together on pizza. I think its a similar balance, that the acidic, salty olives balance out the...While I am a fan of pineapple on pizza, so bias, I particularly like pineapple and green olives together on pizza. I think its a similar balance, that the acidic, salty olives balance out the juicy sweetness of the pineapple.
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Comment on What does a newcomer moving to your town/city/state/country need to know? in ~life
lackofaname Link ParentHuh, we live in the same town, by which I mean: even if we don't literally, we do.Huh, we live in the same town, by which I mean: even if we don't literally, we do.
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Comment on What are your goto cocktails? in ~food
lackofaname LinkNot sure about a name or specific ratios, but I enjoy: -highball-sized glass, add ice -Empress gin, about 1 hearty shot -Grapefruit juice, a couple shots -top with fizzy water -Garnish with fresh...Not sure about a name or specific ratios, but I enjoy:
-highball-sized glass, add ice
-Empress gin, about 1 hearty shot
-Grapefruit juice, a couple shots
-top with fizzy water
-Garnish with fresh rosemary sprig, rubbed to release the flavours -
Comment on How do you feel about your PTO? in ~life
lackofaname Link ParentFlip side of banking so many days off is that you could.. maybe.. float a sabbatical and have them hire a temp fill in. I realize crappy companies or managers wouldn't respond well to that, and...Flip side of banking so many days off is that you could.. maybe.. float a sabbatical and have them hire a temp fill in.
I realize crappy companies or managers wouldn't respond well to that, and even crappier ones could jeopardise your job, but might be an idea.
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Comment on How do you feel about your PTO? in ~life
lackofaname Link ParentThis is pretty similar to my experience (19 paid days off, plus normal holidays, unlimited sick), and I feel the same, I could use more. I rarely take big, fun vacations as most of my longer...This is pretty similar to my experience (19 paid days off, plus normal holidays, unlimited sick), and I feel the same, I could use more. I rarely take big, fun vacations as most of my longer periods off I dedicate to visiting family and the rest I end up using to make many long weekends over the year for mini-recharges (especially after paid Friday afternoons off got cancelled in my dept).
I'm also able to opt into a certain amount of unpaid vacation. The deducted pay gets taken out of my paycheques throughout the year, so normal pay isn't disrupted (it gets paid out if unused). I'm feeling such a need for a rest, this might be the first year I end up using it. We'll see.
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Comment on Long-term experiences with Google search alternatives? in ~tech
lackofaname LinkI've tried to use DDG over the years, but it never quite stuck. At the moment, I've switched to Qwant on my phone, mostly because it's not US based. At least for casual, nonwork use, I'm liking it...I've tried to use DDG over the years, but it never quite stuck.
At the moment, I've switched to Qwant on my phone, mostly because it's not US based. At least for casual, nonwork use, I'm liking it well enough to keep using it. It reminds me of a little of old-school Google, at least in the simple list layout.
Occasionally, I switch back to Google if I'm particularly stuck getting results for something, maybe 1 in 20 casual (nonwork) searches? A small annoyance, but If I'm looking for recent results I find it funny qwant doesnt offer an option for 'past year' (only up to past month).
I haven't yet tried it for work on my laptop, so can't opine on that usage.
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Comment on What's a feeling you sometimes experience that you don't have a name for? in ~talk
lackofaname Link ParentAhh, you know maybe it is. I guess I've never associated my experience with that term. Fever just makes it sound so frenetic and bacchanal.Ahh, you know maybe it is. I guess I've never associated my experience with that term. Fever just makes it sound so frenetic and bacchanal.
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Comment on What's a feeling you sometimes experience that you don't have a name for? in ~talk
lackofaname Link ParentOoh, that's a good one. Still get it as adult sometimes in the right context, though it'd be so much nicer if streetlights were still warm orange.Ooh, that's a good one. Still get it as adult sometimes in the right context, though it'd be so much nicer if streetlights were still warm orange.
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Comment on What's a feeling you sometimes experience that you don't have a name for? in ~talk
lackofaname LinkVery timely one. I suppose it is describable, but not in a word alone. Every year, mid-march, I start to feel the lightness of spring. The days are beginning to feel juuust long-enough, the...Very timely one. I suppose it is describable, but not in a word alone.
Every year, mid-march, I start to feel the lightness of spring. The days are beginning to feel juuust long-enough, the weather is juuust warm enough, the snow is melted juuust enough to see some grass and a few early flowers, my winter SAD lifts, and all the potential of the year ahead is spread out in front of me. It's the confluence hope, relief, energy, brightness, contentment all in one.
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Comment on What have you been eating, drinking, and cooking? in ~food
lackofaname Link ParentI'm also a huge fan of collards in soups and stews. (Pretty much interchangeable with kale, but i find collards easier to grow, so cheaper for me.) If you haven't already, I suggest trying caldo...I'm also a huge fan of collards in soups and stews. (Pretty much interchangeable with kale, but i find collards easier to grow, so cheaper for me.)
If you haven't already, I suggest trying caldo verde, a portuguese greens and potato soup. Really easy to make and very warming/comforting!
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Comment on Hi, how are you? Mental health support and discussion thread (March 2025) in ~health.mental
lackofaname Link ParentI'm so sorry. It feels like such a heavy, uncertain time geopolitically right now. I'm Canadian. My big 'snap', if I may commiserate, was last month around the (first) threat of tariffs against...I'm so sorry. It feels like such a heavy, uncertain time geopolitically right now.
I'm Canadian. My big 'snap', if I may commiserate, was last month around the (first) threat of tariffs against Canada. Between the stress and anger, I felt like I had tunnel vision for days.
Now facing tariff deadline #2 and I at least feel much steadier; more resolved to whatever may come. For me yesterday's news was repulsive, but not shocking.
I'm doing my little part to try and support Canadian (or, well, not US) and my community, which feels nice and realistically it's all that's in my control. It can't really shake the sadness I feel over the state of things.
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Comment on US President Donald Trump cuts short talks with Ukraine’s Volodymyr Zelenskyy after Oval Office blow up in ~society
lackofaname Link ParentTo my eyes, it struck me that every proper opportunity Zelenskyy had to speak, he remained very calm and gave very smart, measured statements. It felt as if Trump's and Vance's increasing loudness...To my eyes, it struck me that every proper opportunity Zelenskyy had to speak, he remained very calm and gave very smart, measured statements. It felt as if Trump's and Vance's increasing loudness later during the meeting was to simply crowd Zelenskyy out of further opportunities to speak and retain their version of the narrative.
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Comment on How often do you replace your phone? in ~tech
lackofaname Link ParentThis is pretty much my trajectory, but add a couple years to each date. I'm on my second smart phone and it seems to have some life in it still.This is pretty much my trajectory, but add a couple years to each date. I'm on my second smart phone and it seems to have some life in it still.
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Comment on The ideal candidate will be punched in the stomach in ~health.mental
lackofaname Link ParentThat's fair, it really comes down to personal preference. I'd much prefer to do waste management (even cleaning portapotties) over snow removal! I'm similarly in a place where I'm slowly starting...That's fair, it really comes down to personal preference. I'd much prefer to do waste management (even cleaning portapotties) over snow removal!
I'm similarly in a place where I'm slowly starting to think about what my next step will be after doing the office-job-thing. Though it's hopefully a few years out in my case, and still mostly percolating in my subconscious, I remember finding waste management to be a very interesting topic back in my undergrad days (environment/toxicology, completely unrelated to my office work). Who knows, perhaps it is something I'll look into down the line :)
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Comment on The ideal candidate will be punched in the stomach in ~health.mental
lackofaname LinkDidn't notice the very long read tag, but I read through to the end on an impromptu day off from my office-type job. Even though I generally don't hate my job and it's usually pretty measured in...Didn't notice the very long read tag, but I read through to the end on an impromptu day off from my office-type job.
Even though I generally don't hate my job and it's usually pretty measured in what it asks of me (outside of periodic shitty projects like one right now), I laughed (with conflicting feelings) at how many of the little details were relateable. The inane kudos board, the fancy huge entrance with confusing smart elevators, the insufferable performance goals and reviews. Gosh, I even went to uni with a JR, wonder what he's up to now?
The HN thread posted elsewhere has a comment that the best jobs are the medium pay/medium expectations jobs. I think I'm lucky to be more or less there at the moment, where I can set boundaries for myself (in fact have a manager who actively encourages it), and so can mostly roll my eyes at the BS. Even still, I've had thoughts about moving on, searching for 'better' work for no good reason other than because I could. Now I'm of the mind that I'd like to keep this stability for hopefully a few more years while my partner navigates a career change, and while I plan a next step, whatever it may be.
I've turned down a couple of opportunities that would have been better paying/better growth ultimately because I sensed I'd lose enough of my boundaries/balance that it would impact me. In one case, it would have been in the same department, but under a manager who immediately came to mind in the descriptions of Chris. The people who floated the recommendation were shocked when I turnedit down, but what could I say? Youre awesome but your director is an asshole? Someone who punched down and made his team anxious and stressed, but played the 'I'm cool' attitude.
On that note, I'll end my meandering with the quote that made me laugh-out-loud the most:
...We’re trying to get all of you some more mon-ayyy.” He [Chris] could’ve said ‘money’ like an adult, but we all make our choices in life.
I do struggle not to pick up too much corporate speak, but I will do my absolute best never to sing the praises of mon-ayyy like this.
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Comment on The ideal candidate will be punched in the stomach in ~health.mental
lackofaname Link ParentI realize this isn't the main point of your post and are likely being a bit facetious, but snow removal is utterly miserable work. My partner did it for a winter (though not the plow driver, which...I realize this isn't the main point of your post and are likely being a bit facetious, but snow removal is utterly miserable work. My partner did it for a winter (though not the plow driver, which I'd guess would be less aful). Neither of us are shy to manual labour, but he was called out in the worst, coldest, wettest weather, and at all hours - but usually over night. To each their own, yet among all possible manual/physical/seasonal jobs out there, snow removal is one of the ones I'd be least interested in, personally.
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Comment on What have you been eating, drinking, and cooking? in ~food
lackofaname Link ParentWhen you say sauce, are you thinking along a similar line to a pan sauce, but more creative flavours? When I'm trying to stumble across different dishes and flavours, I often explore Wikipedia. I...When you say sauce, are you thinking along a similar line to a pan sauce, but more creative flavours?
When I'm trying to stumble across different dishes and flavours, I often explore Wikipedia. I realize it sounds trite, but with all the food lists, cuisine portals, and "similar" links, it's genuinely helped expose me to new foods (edit, I'm sure I've perusedthe list of sauces many times).
Another thing I often do for cooking is try imagining subbing out a component of the recipe, and then doing a web search to see if similar recipes exist. For a pan sauce, I might ask, what liquids could i use (eg, broths, fruit juices, alcohols, etc); what types of acids (citrus, wine, various vinegars, sour condiments); what herb/spice/flavour blends (sky's the limit, but I often draw cultural inspirations, like "what if pan sauce but chinese 5 spice"); what fats could I use (butter, cream, olive oil, flavoured oils like sesame); do I want to sweeten it (fruits, tomato, honey)?
While I dont cook a tonne of pan sauces specifically, here are a couple Ive enjoyed that go beyond basic gravy:
-Citrusy piccata sauce (buttery, lemony, capery) or orange sauce (classically with duck).
-whiskey sauce as in spanish solomillo al whisky, though I like to sub in brandy for an incredibly decadent sauce.
-Apples can make the basis for great sweet/savoury sauces, like miso apple sauce for pork, or apple/herb sauces, or spiced apple sauces.Hope this helps giveyoh some ideas?
Yes, absolutely. When I'm stressed, it's so difficult turning my mind off and it affects my sleep. Then, my sleep schedule gets completely disregulated and into weird cycles (sometimes not falling asleep, sometimes waking up in the middle of the night, sometimes waking way too early).
During the daytime, I sometimes find myself humming to block out an intrusive thought. A funny little thing but it seems to help! My last therapist also helped me learn to create "balancing thoughts" that help me flip my own narrative against whatever is stressing me. They don't change or dismiss reality. Just help change my outlook where possible, which can have an overall positive impact on my thoughts.
I also give myself grace that can be perfectly ok to distract myself from my own worries. Doom scrolling wouldn't really be a healthy distraction, but at night, I sometimes fall asleep (or fall back asleep) listening to an audiobook or long video on my phone, as my brain is too busy focusing on the narration to get stuck worrying.
Exercise and spending time outdoors can also help me sleep, if only by tiring me enough physically that it overrides my mind's activity.
As a final measure, I have a prescription for a light sleep aid. I don't (and am not supposed to) use it often, but it's frankly a relief just to know I have a backup, and it helps me to re-regulate my sleep cycle when I do take it.