56
votes
Confess your food crimes
Do you devour dessert first?
Do you eat your pizza with a fork and knife?
Do you put ketchup on your steak, or eat it well-done?
This is a place to confess your food crimes -- the worst, oddest, or most atypical ways/things/combinations that you eat.
In addition to confession, you may also take a moment to preach. Win over some converts. Convince others of your ways. It could be that, after hearing your defense, the jury here will actually find you not guilty...
Ketchup on cold pizza, straight from the fridge!
You're a monster. I support you, and you go and do your monster things, but if you ask me you're objectively wrong.
Thank you! My uncle taught me this particular monstrous action, I hope to pass it on one day! In defense of those who don't like monsters, I believe I would also find this disgusting if I hadn't been shown at a young age!
Sweet lord at least do ranch instead!
(That's a thing where I'm from... I don't like it but it's A Certified Thing.)
Legalize ranch!
Counterpoint, French dressing (a common central Illinois pizza topping. I'm not a fan)
counterpoint, kewpie mayo mixed with gochujang. (or franks red hot)
Not a mayo person but whatever floats the boat!
my Turkish friends always put ketchup on pizza. It isn't too bad.
Siracha is just good ketchup so I get it.
yeah, its less of a topping and pretty much just more sauce.. that is sweeter. If you haven't tried it, its worth it once. Of all the things I've seen on pizza over the years, this one is tame.
Sometimes it's just what I need, yup!
Ketchup on hot pizza. Used to piss my classmates off in elementary school but tomato is tomato, sorta
If I were a chef, this would be my specialty.
Peanut Butter, Pickle (dill) and Cheese (cheddar or American).
Kraft Mac with leftover General Tsos mixed in.
Spiced Coke is a crime that I can't take credit for. It's so bad my grocery store mostly couldn't give it away for free. I'll drink it though. The mild revulsion keeps my consumption down.
A roast beef, red onion, and provolone wrap, but also with the equivalent weight of shredded horseradish in the middle.
Maggi sauce on Chips Ahoy.
Mixing expensive rum with a bit of Dr. Pepper. I stand by that neither overpowers the other, except that the nasty alcohol burn goes away. It tastes exceptionally better than mixing with garbage rum.
Takis with a bit of vanilla frosting on them.
Just like a spoonful of Vegemite.
Ham and Cheese on Matzos.
Pizza with a whole head of garlic and like a dozen olives.
My dad used to put salsa in his morning oatmeal. I guess that's where I get it from.
I've always been a big fan of pb and pickle sandwiches. Gotta be a strong garlic dill, and a salted crunchy pb (Adams in my case) but Ive never thought of adding cheese.
Okay, seems trashy but I can get behind it...
Why do you do this to yourself?
This is not controversial. You've described a perfectly balanced horseradish-and-beef sandwich.
No comment.
As someone who mixed Bacardi 151 with Dr Pepper back in the day maybe I'm uncultured but I'll fight you on this.
Alright you've gone off the deep end now and I can no longer try and relate.
Tell your dad the internet disapproves of his culinary decisions for me, thanks.
When I was a kid my dad would make peanut butter and dill pickle sandwiches sometimes (no cheese though). Definitely sounds weird, but it works pretty well.
Not that it is the exact same, but one of my favorite kinds of pizza slice is "General Tso's" which was a white pizza that had cut up General Tso's chicken, broccoli, and onion, with the sauce drizzled over. I think I am going to you crime, thanks!
As a kid I used to do BBQ sauce (whatever was on hand) or yellow mustard and sometimes a slice of cheese... times were simpler when my taste buds were still developing!
A long time ago I accidentally dripped mustard from a subway sandwich on one of their chocolate chip cookies and it was actually really good.
I've never bothered to try to recreate it, because... it's kinda weird, probably specific to the subway flavors, and subway has gone so far down the drain in the last 5+ years to the point I find it nearly inedible.
The oatmeal got me for a second, until I remembered that green chile and cheese in oatmeal/cream of wheat is pretty solid. I should do that again soon.
And absolutely nothing wrong with the pizza. The rest of 'em.... You do you lol.
Welcome to my life, new wrap. Thank you vord. I think I could sneak some mustard in there too, and probably hot sauce (redundant? Ehh I'll throw it in there anyway)
Local Chinese food place near me has off-menu "House Mustard" which best I can tell is nothing but crushed up mustard seed and horseradish. It's great and really clears the sinuses. Might be worth asking around.
@atchemy might enjoy too.
Instead of hot sauce, go with a nice spicy mustard, lots of it.
Chips ahoy the cookies?
Spoonful of Vegemite also
sounds insaneseems interestingRegarding garlic pizza, whole cloves or sliced or minced?
Yes the cookies.
Some cloves minced and spread with some olive oil for the base. Then the rest of the head sliced and placed out intermixed with the olives.
I'll throw anything in kraft mac. Canned vegetables, lentils, chickpeas, black beans + tomatoes and green chilis. My go-to is a can of peas. I tend to work late into the night, so when I come home to make dinner, I want something easy and quick. Mac and Peas is easy and quick.
That just sounds like a good pizza to me
Hmm. Ever tried it with garbanzo beans? Might also be good.
Garbanzo beans are just another name for chickpeas.
Yes, but chickpeas are not peas.
Never mind, I just realized they mentioned chickpeas. I must have missed it.
That's... definitely not Kosher for Passover.
Possibly the closest thing to an actual food crime here - it at least violates religious law lol
Pretty much anything that mixes meat and cheese being against (traditional)Jewish law. Religious food laws make a lot more sense within the context of not understanding germ theory.
The best part is that this particular crime is one inherited from my Jewish partner and her Christian grandmother.
So many wonderfully blasphemous ideas!
I'm not usually a fan of pineapple on pizza. I don't judge people who like it but I'm not usually a fan of sweet things on savoury dishes in general, HOWEVER, I've found a weird synergy. If you put feta cheese on a ham and pineapple pizza it balances out to a very good combo imho.
The sweetness of the pineapple, the saltiness of the ham, combined with the funky mild foot odour of the feta all combines in a way that's bigger than the sum of its parts.
Also adding jalapeños and banana peppers and a siracha drizzle balances the sweet via heat and becomes something entirely better.
Thank Dominos for that one. Best thing that chain ever put out.
There's a... I think tiktok trend now, mixing some fruit with feta. I want to say it's mango? Apparently delicious
feta in a watermelon and prosciutto salad is very delicious
Watermelon with feta is in fact quite common in Greece!
This, but grilled is one if the few things I enjoy from the barbecue. Grilled watermelon is soooo amazing and the feta is a great contrast!
I had no clue you could actually grill watermelon, as it's almost completely water, but I bing-ed it and it does look really nice. I can almost imagine the flavour!
that sounds like a new spin on the old "canned fruit with cottage cheese"
As a vegetarian, the standard veggie pizzas where I live are quite boring and often include boring (peppers) or unacceptable (fresh tomatoes) stuff, so I usually order my "special" pizza: mushrooms, feta, pineapple and onions.
Everything ties together really well.
When I go out for pizza, I always make mine into basically a salad on bread. Peppers, onions, and whole garlic cloves are must-haves, but artichoke hearts, crushed fresh basil, even spinach and broccoli are all fair game.
Salad on bread sounds amazing, but only for some places and moods - I shall try to adopt this ideal sometime, thx!
I mostly eat pizza when I'm in the mood for greasy fingers and 24h fullness
A pizza bianca with mushrooms, feta, spinach, and kalamata olives is incredible, one of my favorites. The only thing better is an authentic pizza Margherita.
I feel like this is the opposite of a food crime, unless the crime here is turning a pizza into a wholly new thing.
Hear me out - grainy Dijon mustard on ham and pineapple pizza. So good...
That sounds like perfectly reasonable food to me
While I am a fan of pineapple on pizza, so bias, I particularly like pineapple and green olives together on pizza. I think its a similar balance, that the acidic, salty olives balance out the juicy sweetness of the pineapple.
Do you put the feta before or after the oven?
Before. ends up melting a little but that's fine.
I like Pineapple and green bell pepper pizzas for that reason. The vegetal greenness of the pepper balances out the sweetness nicely
I love cold pizza with coffee.
Like.... Dipped in coffee?
yeah haha
....wat. pls no.
But I must know: black coffee? Just like, Folgers drip? What kind of pizza? And what on earth kinda morning were you having that led to the discovery?
Could be either black coffe or with milk, I don't know what Folgers is, regular pepperoni pizza is the works great.
A friend of mine told me she normally eats her left overs in the morning with coffee, so I tried it and try to dip it and it tastes great. (I don't know if she also dips them, she came to that combination out of pure laziness).
Folgers is just the coffee brand that is everywhere in the US and very cheap, made with a drip-style machine. Somehow I am both more and less horrified that you're (possibly) using better coffee than that, made with more care (like a French press).
God help me, the next time I have leftover pizza I'm going to try this, whether I want to or not.
I don't live in the US, I live in a third world country, but I would say the only positive thing my country is known for is our coffee, so yeah it's really good.
I don't know if the quality of affects it overall, but everything tastes better with a good coffee imo.
Edit: oh also about the friend who recommend me doing that, her family is a (small) coffee producer, so they grow, toast and grind their own coffee. Now imagine eating cold cheap pizza with a coffee your family produced from the ground up.
If you're dipping pizza into (guessing) Colombian single-origin coffee, I feel like we could get some fancy coffee people to try it. At the very least it would make a funny James Hoffman video. "Testing which coffee goes best on pizza" or something.
Time to figure out how to message James Hoffmann a video suggestion.
I also had that thought about how hilarious his reaction to the concept would be, regardless of how it ended up tasting
He's certainly done equivalently cursed things with good coffee!
Can of condensed mushroom soup, heated up and poured over hot rice = trash risotto
Orange pop + sprite / orange juice + club soda = trashy mimosa
Quite undercooked instant noodles with fried egg in basic clear broth out of a can or package msg. Or same broth with overcooked elbow macaroni and strips of cheap ham. Optional corn kernels thrown in at the last second without seasoning. Paired with 2 triangles of soft white slice bread that doesn't have any discernable complexity to the flavour, with a very stingy amount of butter spread roughly in the middle, and a glass bottle of hot soy milk.
I honestly don't think any of those are a crime. They're oversimplified meals that come together quickly and are budget-friendly.
I feel like the cream of mushroom + rice would have been a huge upgrade over the rice and soy sauce I would eat for dinner every so often when my budget was stretched.
Lol they're no @Vord meals I'll conceed
That... does sound like a decent meal if I'm honest. Though I'll stick with my white rice with saute sauce. Not a food crime if you ask me, but I'm sure someone on the Internet will tell me I'm a monster for it.
It needs to be very very hot. Crack fresh pepper over top. Optional ground hard cheese sprinkled on top.
• Peanut butter and halved green grapes on toast is magical. My partner calls it serial killer shit, but he is the one who is wrong.
• In Sweden they do banana curry pizza, and they are definitely on to something. I haven't managed to recreate it quite right, but it's weirdly good.
• Malört peach ice cream.
• And everything is better with chile. Everything
Edit Malört pro-tip: sip, don't shoot. I know, I know, but trust me on this one. There's actually a lot going on in Malört, but you lose all the good stuff when you shoot it.
This is the only one in the whole thread that really made me reconsider my usual stance of "there are no food crimes, only unadventurous palates".
It's honestly so much better than it has any right to be.... The peaches and sugar knock down a lot of the bitterness, so you get more of the complex flavors of the Malört without the punch-in-the-mouth.
We, uh.... We drink a lot of Malört in my friend group. Like, on purpose, lol
That's barely different than peanut butter & jelly! He's crazy.
Peanut butter and sliced banana is also amazing and I haven't even killed anyone yet!
Add bacon and grill it and you've got an Elvis sandwich.
What in the actual fuck? This is one of those where it's so out there, I actually kinda wanna try this. So just like normal peach ice cream with Malort drizzled on it? I've never had Malort; I only know its reputation.
It would probably work like that too, but I used a Ninja Creami for this experiment and mixed the Malört in before freezing. It was a hit even with people who deeply hate Malört!
Speaking of unusual ice cream flavors, one really needs to try grape nut ice cream. It’s one of the best things you never knew you were missing.
Olive oil ice cream was quite nice
Mesquite ice cream was something I'd try again, if given the opportunity.
Malört isn't really more horrible than salted licorice, so I can kinda see it as a decent accompaniment to something as strongly flavored as peaches, especially frozen.
It's honestly so good, and it works with mango, too!
My mom used to make this curry dish with banana and raisins served with rice. Probably from the same cookbook as the pizza.
Are you from Chicago?
I love malort but nobody else does!
Believe it or not, I have never been to Chicago! Would love to visit sometime though.
A friend lived there briefly, and he brought it back with him. I assume it started as a "lol try this!" but it really does grow on you (rather like a fungus) and the whole group has come to enjoy it. A couple people even tried making their own, which was not as good, and if you ever feel compelled to make jello shots DO NOT overdo the gelatin. Even the most die-hard fans agree: chewy Malört is not it.
Toasted bagel + butter + crunchy peanut butter + cinnamon + imitation bacon bits.
It's kinda trashy, too many calories, and soooo delicious.
instead of cinnamon and bacon bits, you might like raw white onion.
Sadly, I have a mild allergy to onions and that would definitely make me sick. Though I could try horseradish or maybe wasabi for a kick but I'm guessing that wouldn't work too well with the peanut butter.
not sure about the other two, but onions and peanut butter give a low-level thai note that isn't too bad.
This is one of the few posts here that sounds legit good to me lol
It's only a food crime if you get caught! ;)
Unfortunately I live in a wasteland without good bagels atm. Maybe if I ever commit to making my own, I'll try it out, though!
I hear ya, we used to get Costo bagels but the quality tanked a few years ago. A Winco showed up in town with a new bakery that isn't too bad at least.
While one of the upsides of living in Germany is lots of good bakeries, one of the downsides is none of them make decent bagels.
Yea they really did a number on that in the 1940's.
I'm intrigued by this! Certainly sounds decadent ha
From my mother, I like to do a toasted bagel + peanut butter + cream cheese. I don't think it's too offensive but my wife is appalled
Yes, that's me. I like not having greasy hands. If you like using your hands so much, why don't you eat steak and veg with your hands?
My 10 year old has entered the chat.
I used to do this with chicken wings or even ribs. I hate saucy, sticky hands. I once saw a kid who spilled a hot chocolate on his hands, and then didn't immediately try to wipe his hands up...I was getting anxious just watching it.
That said, I've largely gotten over it with wings and ribs with my hands. I say "largely," because I don't actively seek out either. But if I'm with a group and we're going to B-Dubs or some BBQ place, then it is what it is. I'll just use a lot of napkins/paper towels.
Finally, I’m not alone! I hate the feeling too. I’ve gotten over it somewhat as I’ve grown up, but still end up with a pile of napkins after I’m done eating something sticky lol. I’ll end up wiping my hands every couple of wings because I can’t let the feeling linger for long and hate smearing my sticky wing hands on a glass of water or whatever.
Because sometimes its nice to not be seen as a complete weirdo! But if I'm alone (or with 'my' people) I prefer to eat with my hands. Feeling the different textures and temperatures is amazing.
Sameeee. Fries and burgers too... anything messy
If you don't like greasy hands, try eating your pizza slices rolled with the point inside - you're just touching crust. If the toppings are too liquid, use a paper towel (environmentally unsound, I know...) to hold the roll-up.
In public, I'm the person eating ribs and wings with a knife and fork, so...
I've never seen sliced pizza in Italy or central Europe....
Wait. What? So they just serve you a big circle of food? How do you get a portion?
I usually only get pizza as delivery, but yeah most places here other than Domino's deliver it unsliced. I bought a pizza cutter that I use to slice it at home (though I don't eat the slices with a fork and knife afterwards, I use my hands).
They give you a knife.
Was a culture shock for me
It’s one of the many reasons why I have always disliked greasy pizza.
Beef instant ramen (though chicken flavor can work in a pinch) prepared the normal way, but then add in 2 slices of American cheese (Kraft singles for best results) and a spoonful of peanut butter. Stir until well combined/melted, hit it with some Sriracha and enjoy.
This started with just peanut butter but the emulsion would break and I'd end up with peanut precipitate in the bottom of the bowl, which made me unhappy. The American cheese adds emulsifiers to the mix, which keeps the peanut butter in solution and the cheese flavor doesn't hurt a bit. The Sriracha is a given, no controversy there.
This totally works
Have you also tried PB with hoisin sauce and either Sriracha or little less Tabasco? I've yet to see emulsification fail in that combo. Oh!! Also are you using real PB or some abhorrent oil based peanut flavour food substance ? American products behave weirdly sometimes because it's already a tenuous chemical composition
I have not, but that sounds great!
And yeah, I'm just using Jif "natural" peanut butter, so I'm sure it's already a technological marvel lol.
Brown rice with soy sauce, butter, a dash of maple syrup, and a sprinkle of Parmesan cheese. It's an umami mouth orgasm when you're desperately hungry but too tired to cook.
Japanese soy sauce on vanilla ice cream.
Ramen with canned tuna fish and poached egg. It's a power-up when consumed for dinner the day before weightlifting.
Macaroni and cheese with gochujang, bacon, and sliced green onions.
Vegan pizza with garlic hummus instead of cheese.
Carrot and celery sticks dipped in Thai peanut sauce.
Balsamic vinegar, blue cheese crumbles, and a pinch of cayenne pepper on diced cantaloupe.
Candied rendered chicken skin.
Spaghetti noodles with peanut butter, cinnamon, and banana.
Dark chocolate truffles with ghost pepper powder.
I have eaten pastries with chopsticks.
I've done this but with SPAM and just throwing the egg in raw and letting the soup do the hard work.
Otherwise right there with you. Vegan cheese is usually gross, so hummus is a fantastic alternative.
Gonna try that first one on a Ritz in a minute because I don't have any brown rice handy. Will report back momentarily.
Report:
Took a second to get the right setup for cracker.
Fill holes with butter. Sprinkle on cheese. Mix a scooch of maple syrup with a few drops of soy, cover cracker ideally without dripping off edges.
Yummy. Guess I'll sprinkle some soy and parm on my morning pancakes one of these days. Maybe with some Furikake to round it out.
Oohhh now I'm gonna sprinkle furikaki on my next bagel.
Furikake makes nearly all fish, dairy, egg, or vegan dishes better - try it on your next lox bagel, bowl of pasta, omelette, mushroom risotto, or cheese sandwich.
Also, stir a dollop of cream cheese into ramen for a treat - adds richness without grease.
You’re supposed to share crimes, not masterpieces! I would devour this and will likely try it out soon (sans bacon though).
Agreed.
This is gourmand territory
Gribenes are Jewish soul food that I grew up with, in the same way that pork rinds are Southern soul food. And candied bacon is a thing, so I just applied the same technique.
I absolutely lived off of ramen, drained, with canned tuna mixed with mayo (instead of the egg) as a binder for years. Little salt, little pepper, little dried basil if I have it. Sometimes I'll throw some frozen peas into the boiling ramen for a little extra clean protein nudge. I genuinely love the taste, after decades I've never gotten tired of it, and you're right that it's great for lifters. I mostly eat plant-based now but I'll still sneak this into my diet occasionally, as a treat.
Ooohhhh the soy sauce on ice cream sounds great, and the rice bowl thing too. The other guy tried it with crackers, I wonder if this could be a good breakfast bread loaf (or similar)? But what would go on top....? Parm crust? Maple drizzle? Soy drizzle? What kind of ratios are we shooting for here?
I am very lactose intolerant, so if I want mashed potatoes, I use coconut milk instead of milk and butter. And to match the coconut flavor, I sometimes add curry paste. The texture is a little weird compared to normal mashed potatoes, but you can also form it into thin patties and fry it, if that's more appealing.
I absolutely love sardines, and I sometimes make a sandwich consisting of sardines, capers, and spicy salsa on white bread toast. It's kind of like a bizarro-world version of a puttanesca, but way more fish-forward.
Everybody loves pesto, but omit the garlic, and sub the basil with mint, the pine nuts with walnuts, and zest a lemon into it (so basically, mint, walnut, lemon zest, pecorino cheese, olive oil, salt). This goes well on pasta, but it also goes incredibly well with... watermelon. Get out your melon baller, go to town, and sprinkle this on top. Perfection.
Someone else said peanut butter and pickles, and that's a great combo. It's kind of similar to how you'd see pickled vegetables with tahini (another nut/seed butter) in Levantine food. And accordingly, I'll eat these on rice with a protein and a little coriander, cumin, sumac, etc.
And speaking of peanut butter, I love the curry + peanut combination. Old standby recipe for me is to make a beef broth, add massaman curry paste, lime juice, fish sauce, brown sugar, then when serving thicken with peanut butter and pour over ramen noodles. This isn't really even a food crime, it's objectively tasty, but I've never seen anyone do it quite this way.
Related to your last recipe, My dad got a Thai style peanut sauce recipe that is roughly:
1 part sweet chili sauce
1 part hoisin sauce
1 part peanut butter.
Mix it all together with some meat, vegetables, add some curry paste/powder and a can of coconut or regular milk, and serve with rice. Or take that thick sauce and slather it on spring rolls (I keep it simple with carrots and spring mix in spring rolls wrappers*.
That actually sounds really good by the way. Especially the frying it and making potato pancakes. What is your binding ingredient when you do fry it?
No binding ingredient necessary - the consistency is a bit stickier than your standard mashed potato, so it stays together pretty well when fried.
My partner is lactose intolerant and I need to be mindful of my dairy intake too, so I swap out coconut milk for a lot of things. We usually have lactose free milk on hand (nothing else froths to his liking for lattes) but we've actually grown to like the coconut flavour in some dishes more than using regular dairy. I buy coconut yogurt instead of regular yogurt too, for recipes that use it. (Plus coconut doesn't curdle/split in hot dishes like regular dairy does.)
As for peanut butter and curry, I have a peanut butter chicken curry I make every once in a while that turns out really good - it's a great combination. I should try your recipe too, it sounds just as tasty.
I'm vegan. That's criminal, right? 😂
Certainly vilified! This one feels almost too real for this thread.
I never really understand people who are upset about someone else' dietary restrictions. More generally, I don't really understand the tribalism that arises about any mundane things. I mean, I understand that there's some predisposition to being wary of things that are unfamiliar, but as humans we are supposed to be able to rise above those sorts of feelings.
There's also a logistical benefit to being friend with someone who doesn't eat the same things as you. Years ago at a work event, we received a bunch of jerky from a client, and my vegan friend gave me their pack of jerky.
My only problem with vegan food is when it tries to replicate things that are not vegan and end up with a usually-terrible alternative which they hype up as being better than the real thing. Like vegan cheese, the worst offender.
Otherwise? Happy to accommodate all food needs.
The other exacerbating factor is that most I've known IRL are judgy evangelists....and nobody appreciates an unsolicited evangelist, whether that be open source (guilty), Mormonism, or veganism. Especially over the dinner table.
Sometimes I'm astonished by the differences that people experience in things.
There's a pretty great vegan fromagerie in my city, and in my opinion for the most part the cream cheeses are just as good, and many of the other cheeses are pretty good as well. I've been there a half dozen times to buy things and I'm not vegan and love "real" cheese.
I've also only met a few of the proselytizing type of vegan; by far most of the vegans I know have only brought it up in the context of when we were discussing obtaining food. My guess is that probably many people know more vegetarians or vegans than they might think, but those people just don't talk about it.
I'd be delighted to try more vegan cheeses, but the recommended ones are all based on cashews, the one nut I'm horribly allergic to. Anyone have non-cashew recommendations?
I looked at the cheese at our local organic vegan fromagerie and every single one has cashews. :(
I'll keep my eyes open for other suggestions though.
Try making it yourself! You can often sub cashews for something like sunflower seeds.
Rebel Cheese is amazing though not cheap. I could eat their smoked cheddar every day!
Miyoko's, as a more common commercial brand, is decent though very mild in flavor. I dig it as it almost melts like the real thing. I'm very impressed by their butter. Though damn do I miss Kerrygold.
But, yes, I believe cashews are the base due to their neutral flavor and fat content.
I don't know if this is a recommendation as much as it's just a suggestion: Follow Your Heart appears to be coconut based, rather than cashew based. Daiya also appears coconut based, but between the two I would say FYH tastes more cheese-like and Daiya tastes more like what someone who has never had cheese imagines it tastes like based on scent alone. Miyokos uses oat and coconut milk it would seem. It's been a minute since I've had anything from them, but my main complaint with their cheese is it's crumbly and falls apart easily. I don't remember the flavor being bad/weird, though.
I'm currently using the FYH smoked gouda on sandwiches and I'd say it's good. My taste buds are all kinds of wrecked though due to my own weird food styles so, again, I can't say these are recommendations.
Food crime though? Spaghetti. Just standard spaghetti with wheat noodles and mushrooms in a tomato sauce. No meat but with tempeh. Perhaps it is but a misdemeanor when measured up against pizza au jus where the au jus is coffee.
Thank you! I've tried Daiya and like you, wasn't impressed.
I've browsed some recipes based on /u/Akir's suggestion as well, and might give macadamia nut-based homemade cheese a try. There's got to be some combination of fat, protein, and lower starch content in a nut or seed that makes a good vegan cheese.
Desserts should be eaten alongside everything. It's important for the meal to be served all at once so you can see and decide what parts you want to really enjoy.
I'm a firm believer in the original French/European serving practices and against the newly arrived (1700) Russian ways.
[Edit] Desert is part of the landscape. Dessert is part of the food stuffs
But how does one eat a desert? There aren't any locally and I feel like importing one would be expensive and dry?
I don’t think anyone would say it’s crime level, but I increasingly enjoy unpeeled plain root vegetables. Potatoes do not need salt and butter. Russets are naturally creamy and have a lovely flavor, and unless you have really messed up the cooking them they shouldn’t have unbearably tough skins. Carrots don’t really have a skin, or at least they are so thin they shouldn’t really matter., and they have an amazing flavor when they are roasted. And sweet potatoes are already sweet potatoes, so adding extra flavors actually ruins them for me.
That being said they do need to be properly scrubbed down before eating that way.
I hope you implied you're cooking them. Raw potatoes are slightly toxic, and a lot of that toxin is concentrated in the skin.
Otherwise, the skins of root vegetables end up containing a large part of the nutrients if not most of them. IDGAF if my mashed potatoes have bits of skin in them. It's part of the charm of homemade food.
Potatoes should be cooked yes. Carrots depend on the application.
Mashed potatoes should definitely have skins. Mashed potatoes should still have texture to them. Aparantly there are fine dining restautants that will finely mill and run their potatoes through sieves and that just seems gross. I went to a place that did that and it ruined the dish for me.
Oh ya, that's called ricing potatoes and you do it with a ricer (of course). My FIL bought us a ricer as a gift otherwise I would have no idea what it is. We tried it once, it was kind of whatever, and we put that thing away never to be seen again.
I find the worst mashed potatoes are when people mash the crap out of them (maybe some milk as well?) and it ends up too smooth and pasty.
I think that might be different from what I'm talking about. Using a potato ricer will generally push the potato through a fairly rough perferations. But the stuff I'm talking about needs a mill because it forces it through very fine mesh.
Riced potatoes are okay, but it's better hand mashed IMHO.
Feels like a misdemeanor at least.
We always peeled them, but when I was young my family often snacked on lightly salted slices of raw potatoes whenever we were making mashed potatoes or some other potato dish. I always enjoyed them. We always grew Kennebec potatoes which I still find particularly tasty eaten this way.
I eat the same 3 things for at least 90% of my meals.
Ditto lmao
Boxed mac and cheese + a can of whatever is in the cupboard
Rice, cheese, canned mixed veggies, tomatoes and green chilis
$7 box of heart disease from taco bell
Autism? That's a very autistic thing to do (said the newly diagnosed autistic).
Me: When life gives you an autistic hammer....
Psychiatrist examined and said I'm in a grey zone with it. So no diagnosis. I think it's just incompetence to be honest lol, and not having the energy to make anything that is even remotely difficult - so I just make the same safe things over and over. I have actual meltdowns if I try something new and screw it up, which when you try to learn a new recipe, you always screw it up the first time, so it's just a no-go for me sadly..
Your psychiatrist sounds like an idiot tbh.... They call it "a grey zone" when your coping mechanisms are such that they're not inconveniencing those around you (oversimplification, obviously, but at the heart of it that's what's happening). And it's not incompetence on your part; yours is a username I recognize from all over this site, and your comments indicate that you're a perfectly intelligent, competent human.
Honestly, if you want help with the "energy" and overwhelm that happens with cooking new things, get you an ADHD dx and some stimulants. I also had meltdowns around cooking, but it turns out I'm a pretty decent cook once the executive dysfunction became a smaller hill to climb. I still have safe foods, because autism, but cooking and eating are not the constant bandwidth-consuming issues they were without Adderall. (That's really all stimulants do for us, they allocate bandwidth more efficiently so that everything isn't so goddamn hard all the time. If your homemade brain chemicals aren't cutting it, store-bought is fine!)
Hey, congrats on your shiny new dx! May it bring you as much comfort and hope as mine did :)
It's been the opposite.
Sensory unmasking kicks my ass every time I try to do anything useful around the house. Suddenly feels like I'm trying to crawl out of my own skin.
It's as though my brain has been lying to me for decades but, now that the truth is out, it's decided to stop lying. The result is painful and debilitating.
I'm so sorry. It gets easier though! Or at least, it did for me and I hope it eventually does for you, too.
If you ever want suggestions, or just to chat/vent about it, feel free to message me. It might take me a day or two to get back, but I will, and it's a special interest of mine so I'm always happy to talk about it.
Nutritional meal replacement type thing ? (Soylent, Hol, huel etc)
I am trying to think of what my food crimes are, if anything it's what I dislike... I prefer boxed stuffing to homemade dressing, and boxed Kraft Mac and Cheese to fancy stuff. I don't like peanut butter, nuts or caramel in my chocolate and I often prefer cheap American chocolate to the fancier stuff. (White chocolate is generally my fav. )
I don't like Kraft singles but do like cheap and expensive cheeses alike. But also, I confess nothing because food is not a space for shame!
Yeah so I'm not sure if those count or not
You win the thread lol
Wow. That's so American that it hurts.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
It's honestly more of a sensory thing as much a nostalgia thing. (And I get plenty of "you're wrong about this" from Americans, so nah)
I make up for it in the breadth and depth of my cheese selections
Well, I'm American... granted, I've only know some twenty somethings from back when I was one who would eat like that.
I mean I eat lots of other stuff too, just those specific things are weird preferences I have!
If I'm really busy and no one is around to witness it, I make tea by putting the teabag and sugar in a cup, adding hot water to steep (not stirring) and then pouring it over a stack of plain Maribon biscuits in a bowl, making sure to top it with the gooey half dissolved sugar.
Also I have a range stupid pop-corn toppings that no one wants to try.
Pop-corn is made in a wok (can use foil if your wok doesn't have a lid) using clarified butter and a little bit of brown sugar if feeling for some sweet. And then its a choice between:
As a vegan, with your zombie mix, I'm here going "Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Wat?" It's an unami bomb with a (little?) sweet. I tend to bristle at sweet invasion but then Americans love sugar in everything so....
So the original zombie mix is when I was on the hunt for a maximum umami shot to the mouth. Was playing with dry rubs for steak, powdered mushrooms and other bbq herbs but it was always feeling like styrofoam biltong (beef jerky). The sea weed and yeast kept it feeling like a plant and fine msg was the kicker. But I think it just became too much over time so the msg is massively reduced and pinch of maple sugar adds a milder sweetness to level it out but with a nice woody note to it.
Would like to give exact measures but it's very much a vibes based recipe.
At least nobody has mentioned the worst food crime: Pouring the milk in your tea first.
There's an old animated song thing about that which I can't find. Anybody who finds it gets a figurative dollar.
I don't think I've seen the animation but I do remember an old graphics, where little cute milk sprites are scalded by hot tea poured upon their poor little souls. Horrific
That's just wrong. Your yea can't become tea when the water is made colder with milk.
My "food crime" is somewhat specific to my relationship, so please forgive me minor backstories.
I make a "breakfast skillet" or "breakfast melt" (though calling it a melt has had other people accuse me of a food description crime). Generally, it gets put together by having a base layer of home fries, sauteed vegetables, and some kind of breakfast protein - most frequently breakfast sausage, but we do ham, bacon, or spoiler alert another item - then you top it with (usually cheddar) cheese and then throw on a couple of over easy eggs on top. The eggs melt the cheese into everything and make a sort of delicious sauce. My wife requests this as her number one comfort food; it's probably her favourite thing to eat that I make (and I cook 98% of the food in the house).
My wife's family makes these really amazing kabobs (sic. that's how they spell it, seems to be "the Karachi way"). My mother-in-law has several sisters, and many of them make kabobs, and they're all a little bit different, but they're all sausage shaped meet, all very spicy, and all delicious. It's probably my favourite dish that they collectively make, and they routinely give out large containers full of frozen kabobs for people to make at home.
Sometimes I make the breakfast skillet with kabobs. It's amazing, like they were handcrafted to make the most delicious possible combination of things that can be in your mouth. But one time someone told the auntys that I did this and I was, for a while, excommunicated as a kabob recipient. You can't just use kabobs as an ingredient.
That was years ago, and I guess I've done my time for the crime, because I have started receiving packages of kabobs again, but that's my crime, and I could only sneak out cooked kabobs after family events for my home kabob needs for 5 or 6 years.
Sounds like the aunties need to be served your breakfast skillet with their meats inside.
(It does sound delicious.)
Something that would probably offend every Japanese:
I blend two cloves of garlic, the juice of one lemon, a teaspoon of salt, and one block of silken tofu, until it’s nice and creamy.
Then I boil soba noodles for about three minutes.
And then I drain them and eat them with the sauce, hot.
I understand that soba noodles are supposed to be eaten cold, and certainly not with any sauces like this.
It’s a comfort food for me, as well as something that I can throw together in about 10 minutes. I randomly came up with it when I was living in Japan.
Zarusoba is cold and with a dipping sauce, Yakisoba is fried just like any fried carb (fried rice, etc) .
Oh, wow! I didn’t know about yakisoba! Thanks for sharing! My recipe is still pretty unique then. Maybe I should introduce it to the Japanese. 😆
So if I understand correctly the sauce is uncooked, only whipped?
This would mean eating two cloves of uncooked garlic.
RIP to whomever you're talking to after eating this dish.
Haha. That’s right! 😂 Two cloves of uncooked garlic.
I’ve had a lot of people complain to me over the years that not only can they smell my garlic breath, but also my garlic sweat (when I sweat). 😂 I don’t care. I eat two raw cloves sliced up on toast bread every morning anyway (been doing that for years). It helps me to minimize catching colds. 😋
Offensive childhood comfort foods are amazing. One of my favorites is elbow macaroni with sour cream and butter.
Well, dang. That clearly dethrones my soba with the garlic sauce. Wow. 😂 I think I want to try that out. How do you usually prepare it?
Just cook the pasta, drain normally. Then add butter to all of it, and scoop a bowl for yourself. Add as much sour cream as you would like and mix. Then eat!
Do you use salted butter or...?
I use whatever I have on hand. Unsalted, salted, vegan, cultured.... it just depends on what I can easily get to in my fridge at any time. Any butter is delicious.
Pouring milk in my bowl before adding cereal 😂
(I just like measuring out the milk first since what I really enjoy is cereal-flavored milk, I save it for last after eating the cereal)
I also love Mcdonalds chicken nuggets dipped in their plain ice cream! I generally enjoy salty+sweet combos
I like Wendy's fries dipped in chocolate frosty. Nothing better!
Milk First people unite!! It gives the cereal somewhere soft to land instead of clink and bounce back out of the bowl. Also cereal contains almost all the sugar and if I already have the bowl full I might have less. Failing that, the cereal floats so I only add one layer, which is also the perfecf amount of time to eat before any is soggy
Of course I don't eat pizza with fork and knife. I eat it with my hands crust first. I know, apart from being backwards it's more impractical. But, hear me out, the crust is the least flavourful part. Some people just leave it, but I'm not ok with food waste. So I eat it first and leave the yummys for the last bite. Sue me.
But structural integrity? I've seen people fold wet side over crust so they have a hold, flavours even out, and it can be eaten real quick.
Although I understand eating bland parts first: I'm also the type to leave best for last.
I understand what you're saying about the structural integrity, it's definitely more impractical. It depends a bit on the type of pizza though. In my country we generally eat rectangular pizza with a strong dough base throughout.
https://es.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pizza_a_la_pala
Perhaps this is a cultural difference, but how on Earth is this a 'food crime'? Yes, I eat pizza with a fork and knife when in civilized contexts, and so do most other people around me in those contexts. In many cases a good pizza would not even be reasonably edible by hand. Some pizzas, especially those in restaurant contexts, are meant to be eaten with a fork and knife; others, especially those in contexts like street vendors, are meant to be eaten by hand.
Looking into this a bit, it appears the anti-utensil view, seeing using a knife and fork as a travesty, is some sort of New York City combination of crassness and pretension, though most sources at least seem to be criticizing using a knife and fork to eat NYC-style pizza, in NYC.
I think that it's pretty tongue-in-cheek. In my experience (I've been to most of the Canadian Provinces, and about 20 different states, and several places in the Caribbean), many people in North America classify pizza as a finger food, like burgers, hot dogs, fried chicken, and as such just don't eat pizza with a fork, ever.
More generally, though, I think that the idea of a food crime is coming from a good place here - @kfwyre isn't the sort to bring anything other than love and consideration to a topic - so it's mostly a fun little jab, as are all the other examples. I've been reading this thread more for ideas of things to put together and try than to judge what anyone else is doing, and I think that's probably the case for most of us here.
Oh, yes - my comment was not meant as a criticism of @kfwyre at all; I was just rather curious about that being there.
I think it's just a matter of two completely different styles of pizza. European-style pizzas, at least in restaurants, are often thin to the point of not being able to be practically lifted and eaten by hand. I've also had these in California.
Might just be a cultural thing - I’m not from New York and the only time I’d consider a fork and knife for pizza is if it’s deep dish. If you ate pizza that way here, nobody would bother you but you’d probably get some confused looks.
From what I can gather, there seems to be a class component. As if using knife and fork made you upper class or something? Which is funny because everyone has knives and forks, it's super cheap. I won't think I am better than someone just because I have access to cutlery.
Probably a relic from back in the day when metals were harder to attain.
Milk before cereal is apparently a crime.
Like....most cereal will just float on the surface otherwise. Do you just sprinkle on more cereal as you go?
Pretty much.
Doesn't the cereal just sink into the milk and you'll end up with the same end result?
Not in my experience. I feel like I always ended up with less cereals in the bowl, and a less balanced ratio of milk to cereals, if I poured the milk first. If I filled the bowl with as many cereals as I wanted to eat, then the amount of milk that I would add would always be just enough to equally soak each individual flake.
Interesting.
I always use the minimal amount of milk to prevent sogginess and I don't really like cereal milk.
Cereal actually floats for most part.
sometimes ill make a ton of rice and then instead of making a real meal ill just put some rice in a bowl, add about a quarter cup of minced garlic (the jar kind (costco's is really good)), an inadvisable amount of lao gan ma, and some fish sauce or soy sauce.
and then i eat it with a spoon like its cereal
i usually make enough rice that i can just rinse/repeat until the rice is gone (usually over the course of the whole day)
Any time I get the ketchup out of the fridge (usually because I want to put some on my eggs, which is itself perhaps a food crime), or when I get the yellow mustard out for a sandwich or burger or something, if nobody's looking I'll do a shot straight from the bottle into my mouth.
My father-in-law will just grab a spoonful of mayo for a quick snack.
Thanks, this got me retching.
This is definitely a crime, but I don't care: a nice piece of bread, warm and slightly toasted, coated in Nutella with some salami on top. I love it. The combination of sweet and salty, chocolate and meat, and the softness, but toastedness of the bread is so delicious.
Well, this is the first one that made me go "what?"
I'm gonna try it next time I have lunchmeat.
Wonder if pepperoni and a Reese's would be close enough.
It might be! Try it an report back!
I use shredded cabbage or just bagged coleslaw mix as a base for Caesar salad instead of romaine.
In my defense, I have Crohn's and lettuce doesn't like me much. I used to use spinach (which I can digest just fine) but Caesar dressing is too heavy for spinach and the whole thing just wasn't as pleasant as the real deal. A coworker has similar issues with lettuce and he's the one that suggested it. It's nice and crunchy and it works better than you'd expect it to. I'd like to try it with napa cabbage next.
This is mostly a food crime if you're Italian, but my (Italian, ironically) partner loves putting caramelized onions in carbonara. I find the sweetness of the onions balances out the richness of the pasta quite well. Then again, in the fall I love making a bastardized carbonara with diced apples, maple bacon, and half hard cheddar/half maple apple Boursin cheese, so I'm not much better when it comes to authentic pasta.
This one isn't quite to the extent as other things in this thread, but my partner thinks I'm insane for putting sliced bananas in my PB&J. My parents suggested I try it as a kid and I loved it so much I still do it. Then again, both my mom andy brother also put ketchup on things it doesn't belong, so I may not have had the best food role models lol
Shredded Broccoli salad with ceasar and dried cranberries. Perhaps some pine nuts.
Unfortunately broccoli is even worse for me than romaine, but the rest of it sounds quite tasty!
I came here to confess the crime of making carbonara with thick-cut bacon instead of guanciale and the first thing I see is this breach of the Geneva Convention (I can't wait to try it).
I can't easily find guanciale out here either (or pancetta, which I've seen recommended as a good substitute), so I feel you on that one. Lardons (cubed pork belly) works nicely too.
That specific recipe started out as a combination of "I need to find something to finish this Boursin with" and "we have too many apples and I don't want to make pie again" (we live near an orchard, so in the fall we're drowning in apples) and it worked surprisingly well. Add the apples towards the end so they don't get too mushy - I throw them in the pan for a couple minutes when I'm finishing off the bacon. If you don't have maple bacon on hand, I recommend adding a bit of maple syrup in your egg mixture (and honestly, you can do that even if you do have maple bacon).
Well now I have found my new favorite pasta and am going to have to try this - make a carbonara with caramelized onions mmmmmmm.
We make it with onions most of the time now, it's that good! We use one medium onion per person since it loses a lot of volume as it cooks (we also just really love onions), but feel free to experiment till you find what works for your tastes.
Get a hotdog and bun. Slap some cream cheese in there, then load in your hotdog. Top with sriracha and pickled jalapenos. Instant indigestion but also tasty.
Like a jalapeño popper on a hotdog...love it.
I like my coffee with a lot of cream in it. Like maybe a 1/4 cup or so? But I'll also just drink the cream if there's only a little bit left in the jug, so I think that's my problem moreso than the coffee. I do like black coffee as well just not as much.
As a non coffee drinker this is the only way I have any on rare occasions: when it's a sugary milk beverage lightly flavored with coffee.
Exception: when its a Hong Kong 鴛鴦 where it's only somewhat milky and sweet but the tea cuts it nicely enough I can drink the coffee
Trash salad: can of corn, can of beans, can of tuna, mix together, add salad dressing. If I'm feeling fancy I'll add some frozen chopped shallots, chives, or spring onions.
Most are normal methinks so they hardly stand out.
I love cheese, so more of it is added to dishes than is the norm. Pizza, pasta, sandwiches, even just eating cheese and crackers.
“Napalming the jungle” as the oatmeal would state. That’s code for love for sriracha on many items.
Melted butter on toast/English muffin topped with jam. Extremely unhealthy and my wife was horrified the first time seeing it. Now, it’s one of her guilty pleasures as well.
Are you supposed to eat these any other way? That's like diner staple 101 here in New Jersey.
Especially English muffins....I find them unbearable without either barely-cooked egg, butter, or hollandaise sauce.
It might be regional. I love everything bagels with both butter and jam and every time I order it in the South, people look at me like I'm insane and will literally say, "are you sure?" I don't know why, it's delicious. Sweet/salty combo.
I live in the PNW now but haven't ordered a bagel here in at least a decade so I can't remember if they think it's weird here as well. I do remember when I lived in Vermont briefly, no one said a word.
This baffles me, as from my experience with eating southern cuisine taught me that bacon grease is one of the food groups.
And that iced tea is meant to be slightly flavored simple syrup.
Like....have they even been inside a Waffle House?
As a Southerner, I think it's more about "not crossing the streams". IME Southern food has a lot of sweet and a lot of salty but they usually don't get served at the same time. If you have bacon in the morning, you drink black coffee, not sweet tea (which is reserved for the yard or porch, on its own). Dessert like ice cream or trifle with coffee is anathema. I remember the first time I suggested drizzling honey over Brussels sprouts with bacon my grandmother looked at me like a horn grew out of my head.
But what about chicken and waffles? That's a southern thing, right? And isn't the whole point getting syrup all over everything?
Bluntly, chicken on top of waffles with syrup as a Southern staple is both a rather recent fad, and sort of a myth. Its origin is actually Amish, using stewed chicken, and the fried chicken "soul food" version originated in New York.
It became part of the soul food culture of the South, but only later, and not actually consumed very often because it wasn't as cheap to make. It was a "special occasion" thing, not something you'd eat at every Sunday supper like collard greens with ham hocks and fried catfish.
You absolutely could not find chicken and waffles in any given Southern restaurant as rule like you can now--spending my childhood in Tennessee, Alabama, and Mississippi in the 80s and 90s, I never once saw it on a menu until it exploded in popularity as a hip, "authentic" trend about 10-15 years ago. Now it's everywhere, and hey, I like it, but strictly speaking it's not really a Southern thing and most of us either never ate it at all, or ate it extremely rarely.
That makes a ton of sense, thanks for the explanation!
Peanut butter and jelly sandwich ... with Doritos nacho cheese chips in the middle.
Fritos chili cheese chips ... washed down with black coffee.
I eat kiwis without peeling them.
I eat strawberries with the green crown attached.
I eat apples including the core.
Like I can get the apple core...tough but not unpleasant.
Does the strawberry include leaf? If not, yea me too. If so, I don't comprehend why.
The kiwis though....that's gotta be rough on the mouth.
Sorry I had to look up what the crown is actually called. It's the "hull" or "calyx".
It's the green star shapped part on top of the strawberry.
It can be a nuisance to remove so I often don't bother.
If I'm making something (cake, dessert, etc.) for other people I'll remove it though.
The kiwi skin ads a sour taste, I do rub in it on some cloth to get some of the hairs of.
It's also better with the yellow kiwis as they tend to be sweeter which works well with the sour skin.
I do the same thing with kiwis, as long as you don't chew the skin itself (it has a very sour taste) it's fine.
I'm just picturing eating them like a peach or an apple.
I love eating kiwi skin. It’s sour and delicious. Now I want one, hah.
I’ll cut it off (leaving a bit of the kiwi flesh attached), then slice the kiwi into wheels, and then eat the skin pieces and the kiwi slices. It is a little better when you get more of the kiwi flesh, so I basically “cube” the kiwi
Many food plants and fruits concentrate toxic (or at least, unappealingly bitter) substances in their skin and seeds (apples), which is why there are traditional methods of preparing them. I used to eat mangoes skin and all, too, but eventually discovered the hard way that the skin and seeds are where most of the allergenic urushiol is concentrated. YMMV.
Kiwi and apple skins are perfectly safe to eat. There are a lot of nutrients in the skin of these fruits, so it's arguably better to eat them with the skin. Strawberry leaves (and presumably also the other attached green bits) are similarly perfectly safe to eat and potentially even good for you.
Apple seeds do contain traces of amygdalin, which can be processed into cyanide by human gut bacteria, but the amount is low enough that it's not remotely dangerous to eat an apple core.
Specific fruits may well have parts that a given person should (or just might want to) avoid eating for some reason, but it's misinformation to pretend that this extends to the seeds and skin of all fruits.
Sure there's components in the fruits which could be toxic but the dosage should be taken into account.
The toxic component in apples is amygdalin.
When metabolized, amygdalin could release about 0.03 mg of cyanide per seed.
The lethal dose of cyanide for humans is estimated to be 0.5–3.5 mg per kg of body weight.
A typical apple has 5–10 seeds. You'd need to chew and ingest around 15–20 apples to reach potentially lethal cyanide levels for an average adult (~70 kg).
Before reaching lethal levels, symptoms of cyanide poisoning (dizziness, nausea, headache, confusion) could appear at much lower doses—around 4–5 apples.
Even if you stick to "an apple a day keeps the doctor away" you'll still be fine.
Urushiol in mango's is a slightly different story as some people are more allergic to this than other people.
Whereas all people are similarly allergic to cyanide.
I tend to eat with my fork in my right hand because why the fuck not. My right hand is more dextrous than my left.
I'm usually a tad elitistic in making food, but my (and my kids') guilty pleasure is macaroni with fried minced meat with just a bit of black pepper and an ungodly amount of salt.
I also sometimes with complete reckless disregard towards reality drink cappuccino after noon.
I dunno if this counts, but I don't really like desert. At least not like right after a meal.
Everyone looks at me like I'm insane when I just ask for a tea when the dessert menu comes out.
My partner's Dad likes to make pasta, minced beef and tomato sauce like he's a 16 year old student or something. That's a food crime lol.
Not just myself, but the vast majority of the Brazilian population eats pizza with knife and fork. That's about 211 million criminals.
Ketchup in my hometwon is still common, but mostly in very cheap places serving somethig that is barely pizza. Nice pizzerias do not provide ketchup anymore, for which I am thankful. But I am in a very non-Italian and overall non-White town. I can still get great traditional Napolitan style pizza here! If you're in São Paulo City (the most Italian capital), asking for ketchup at some places may put your life in danger.
And yes, we got plently of ridiculous pizza trends but we got plenty of good traditional pizza as well. Brazilians like to divulge the most quirky aspects of our culture because it is fun, but we know what good pizza is and we got more people of Italian descent than the US. They're just more spread out.
I like vinegar on my fries. A lot of people consider that a food crime but it's semi normal in Canada in other parts of the world.
That's not the food crime though.
Having fries at home is a PITA so at some point I realized that what I really like is vinegar on a starch with some salt. So I settled on buttered toast with vinegar on it for getting my vinegar + starch fix.
I have way less craving for vinegar now so I haven't done it in several years but it did it for me lol.
If the fry place doesn't have malt vinegar alongside the ketchup it's not worth your money.
My mom hated that I liked it when I was a kid, but for some reason I found it amazingly good: Rice with ketchup. Not potatoes with ketchup, not noodles with ketchup - those are disgusting, but rice with ketchup. Don't know why, it just has something.. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
But French fries? Sometimes hashbrowns?
Half of these posts are about ketchup and meanwhile I’m feeling guilty about eating raw lardons.