fnulare's recent activity

  1. Automation for android, preferably FOSS

    ~tech Ask (recommendations)
    I'm wanting to automate a thing on my android phone. I would like to activate and deactivate alarms based on calendar events (by keywords in their name or description). example I have an event...

    I'm wanting to automate a thing on my android phone.

    I would like to activate and deactivate alarms based on calendar events (by keywords in their name or description).

    example I have an event **work** with the description *shop* so I would like to activate the alarms "wake up work shop 1", "wake up work shop 2" and "wake up work shop 3".
    Do you have any suggestions?
    17 votes

  2. Comment on Is Tildes protected from malicious actors, aka paid trolls, aka bots? in ~tildes

    fnulare
    Link Parent
    Ugh, I kind of hate when that happens, I just start to question the whole text... What is really the thing I'm trying to say (and what is just a clarification or similar)? Sometimes I just delete...

    Ugh, I kind of hate when that happens, I just start to question the whole text...

    What is really the thing I'm trying to say (and what is just a clarification or similar)?

    Sometimes I just delete everything and not only the ()!

    7 votes

  3. Comment on Don’t like joining in? Why it could be your superpower. in ~life

    fnulare
    Link Parent
    And I say this with the intention of sympathy, and not an attempt to minimize your feelings: you may not be able to generalise from your own experience. My related story: during my childs ADHD...

    I say this with the intention of sympathy, and not an attempt to minimize your feelings: a lot of people feel this way, myself included.

    And I say this with the intention of sympathy, and not an attempt to minimize your feelings: you may not be able to generalise from your own experience.

    My related story: during my childs ADHD assessment I realised I probably needed an assessment too as I often had to ask the psychologist and the psychiatrist if this or that wasn't "normal".

    So maybe, just maybe you are an otrovert too! (If it's even a thing!!)

    4 votes

  4. Comment on Hi, how are you? Mental health support and discussion thread (September 2025) in ~health.mental

    fnulare
    Link Parent
    I'm grateful for being in a space where you share about this experience. In my day-to-day I (cishet middle age man) don't hear about miscarriages a lot, especially considering how common they are....

    I'm grateful for being in a space where you share about this experience.

    In my day-to-day I (cishet middle age man) don't hear about miscarriages a lot, especially considering how common they are.

    I, of course, don't mean to take away from your experience by saying you share it with many others, I'm just genuinely perplexed by how little this is talked about - even in comparison to death in general.

    I wish you to have all the possibilities to feel all your feelings in the ways you need with the support of your people.

    3 votes

  5. Comment on Hi, how are you? Mental health support and discussion thread (September 2025) in ~health.mental

    fnulare
    Link Parent
    I have to convince myself really, really hard and over and over again to not act on my reads of the therapist (or similar), to not try and please them or to not make them open up and use the time...

    I have to convince myself really, really hard and over and over again to not act on my reads of the therapist (or similar), to not try and please them or to not make them open up and use the time to talk about themselves.

    I think I'm just hypervigilant in the situation and maybe what @Paul26 wrote is a clue... The lack of reciprocity might make me unsafe so I deploy everything I know to feel less unsafe, will have to think about it, thanks to both of you for giving me something to consider.

    3 votes

  6. Comment on What are your favorite ways to measure your own health? in ~health

    fnulare
    Link Parent
    That's interesting, thank you! How weird it is to finally take the time to ask about a detail I've pondered for over 30yrs and get an answer by one qualified respondent! No, not really, it would...

    Although I studied (not evolutionary) biology, I think 'fittest' can easily be misunderstood by the average non-biologist native English speaker. [...] I have vague recollections that during intro-level biology classes, the 'real' meaning for evolution had to be drilled into students to prevent the misconception.

    That's interesting, thank you! How weird it is to finally take the time to ask about a detail I've pondered for over 30yrs and get an answer by one qualified respondent!

    strong also has the meaning [in English] of being relatively better at something (eg, she has strong language skills), which hits closer to the evolutionary meaning. - Out of curiosity, is this latter meaning of 'strong' used in Swedish?

    No, not really, it would be understood from context and maybe younger people (who are way more lax with their anglicisations) wouldn't notice, but in my generation I'd say no. There is a similar way to use "stark" (swedish for "strong", in many contexts) but only for emotional stuff like "that was a 'strong' play".

    1 vote

  7. Comment on What are your favorite ways to measure your own health? in ~health

    fnulare
    Link Parent
    Thank you very much, what an excellent and thorough reply <3 I don't really ingest information from videos that well but I guess it's time to get my own copy of Overcoming gravity that everyone...

    Thank you very much, what an excellent and thorough reply <3

    I don't really ingest information from videos that well but I guess it's time to get my own copy of Overcoming gravity that everyone talks so much about :)

    I will also bookmark (and download) the linked spreadsheet, what a fantastic resource!

    1 vote

  8. Comment on What are your favorite ways to measure your own health? in ~health

    fnulare
    Link Parent
    Do you use any publicly accessible online resources for your calisthenics "programming" and progressions that you could share here? I'm doing some very basic stuff atm but that is sufficient for...

    Do you use any publicly accessible online resources for your calisthenics "programming" and progressions that you could share here?

    I'm doing some very basic stuff atm but that is sufficient for now but I'm always interested in having more information.

  9. Comment on Hi, how are you? Mental health support and discussion thread (September 2025) in ~health.mental

    fnulare
    Link
    Hahaha, it's so dumb! I've been anticipating this topic for a week, I really like it, it feels like one of the things that makes Tildes feel like a place for me. Now I feel like I have to write...

    Hahaha, it's so dumb!

    I've been anticipating this topic for a week, I really like it, it feels like one of the things that makes Tildes feel like a place for me.

    Now I feel like I have to write something interesting or unique or engagimg. It feels dumb to just tell you how I'm doing.

    Maybe I just don't know...

    (And typing that out made my eyes fill up with tears... Is the "correct" expression "made my eyes well up"?)

    Oh well...

    4 votes

  10. Comment on What are your favorite ways to measure your own health? in ~health

    fnulare
    Link
    My biggest obstacles in life are anxiety, procrastination and a sense that it would be quite restful to not exist (dw, I'm not suicidal), so with that said I have come to find a few thermometers...

    My biggest obstacles in life are anxiety, procrastination and a sense that it would be quite restful to not exist (dw, I'm not suicidal), so with that said I have come to find a few thermometers that help me measure how I'm doing and how kind I need to be to myself.

    First and most basic thermometer is if, when and how I managed to make my bed today. The later in the day the rougher I'm having it. The less friction (or active decision making) the better I'm doing. Some days it's enough to notice my bed is not done to realise I'm having one of those days and I can completely change my plans and sense for the day.

    The rest of the thermometers are not ranked and are a bit more fuzzy, I'll tell you about a couple if them so you get a feeling for how you could use something similar.

    Did I pay my bills on time and how easy was it. I pay my bills around the 27th of every month, except a few debit card based recurring subscriptions that are automatic. I have setup a few other automatic payments like the union and unemployment insurance but I need to pay the most important ones manually to notice where my money goes and to know how well I'm doing.

    While the bed thing takes care of daily form the bills thing takes care of longer time form (this is the one that sets of the "depression and how deep it is"-alarm bells!

    Wrt to physical health I know I'm doing good when I get back on the horse in just a few days after falling off! I don't get any gratification from doing my morning routine, my back strengthening exercises, my full body workouts or my "daily" cardio (although I suspect that if I ever manage to go really hard on cardio I might get that dopamine hit I hear so much about) so it's quite hard to keep doing it. I fall off often, so getting back on it quickly is a good way for me to notice I'm doing well.

    Other than these kinds of thermometers I don't have any measurements I like, the rest are just numbers that don't represent any meaningful things compared to the status of my bed :)

    On "survival of the fittest" and language

    In my primary language (swedish) the phrase "survival of the fittest" has been translated to "survival of the strongest".

    I have always thought that this mistranslation has affected how we see biology, evolution and fitness.

    This post reminds me of this but I also wonder if I've been wrong about my assumption and that people with English as their primary language also has seen fitness (how well your capabilities fit your circumstances) as strength, savagery and dominance or of this is a shift that has occurred?

    (I'm obviously excluding evolutionary biologists, regardless of their primary language, from this as understanding this is the basis of their field.)

    6 votes

  11. Comment on Hi, how are you? Mental health support and discussion thread (September 2025) in ~health.mental

    fnulare
    Link Parent
    Welcome to the table, we are thrilled to have you! <3

    Welcome to the table, we are thrilled to have you! <3

    1 vote

  12. Comment on Presenting... PrizeForge: a novel crowdfunding model for sustainable open-source and fighting enshittification in ~tech

    fnulare
    Link Parent
    Oooh, this looks really interesting, I wonder where this is going... Oh! Nowhere! Sorry (not sorry) to be blunt but wealth is not in any way "real value for others". You could argue that the...

    It's better to build systems where sociopathic, self-interested actors, produce outcomes that create real value for others.

    Oooh, this looks really interesting, I wonder where this is going...

    This is the reason why capitalism works so effectively to generate wealth.

    Oh! Nowhere! Sorry (not sorry) to be blunt but wealth is not in any way "real value for others".

    You could argue that the individuals strive for wealth can help with innovation (but this isn't very clear IMO) but to say one persons wealth benefits others is not true, quite the opposite actually.

  13. Comment on What are you reading these days? in ~books

    fnulare
    Link Parent
    Thank you for this! I have long but really slow work days, "cozy fantasy" is a perfect genre to listen to while still keeping part of my brain on "prepared to jump in when needed"-mode. "The Long...

    Thank you for this!

    I have long but really slow work days, "cozy fantasy" is a perfect genre to listen to while still keeping part of my brain on "prepared to jump in when needed"-mode.

    "The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet" is really cozy!

  14. Comment on What are the standards for a good father/husband? in ~life.men

    fnulare
    Link Parent
    This is a great joke, made me laugh this morning, thanks a lot!

    This is a great joke, made me laugh this morning, thanks a lot!

    4 votes

  15. Comment on What are the standards for a good father/husband? in ~life.men

    fnulare
    Link Parent
    I got mixed feelings reading your comment... At first I was expecting to do the "yeah, I know, right, that's insane!" thing of massive recognition. I have been complimented on helping out for just...

    I got mixed feelings reading your comment...

    At first I was expecting to do the "yeah, I know, right, that's insane!" thing of massive recognition.

    I have been complimented on helping out for just walking with my kid in a stroller from point A to B! Not once, many times (my kid is now in their 20s)

    But then... I started to recognise myself in the people complimenting you for being a good parent instead. I do that all the time, to all parents: when I see someone doing well with their child(ren) in a way that I like I tell them, if possible.

    (I do also offer kind words of encouragement in difficult situations or offer myself as distraction if appropriate.)

    I wonder if maybe you are putting a little bit too much into the "not awful father" basket rather than the "good parent" basket.

    I'm not trying to tell you you're wrong, you where there and felt the situations.

    I'm more hoping I don't have to take a hard look at myself and how I interact with parents and children in public!

    10 votes

  16. Comment on Looking for novel retro puzzle game recommendations in ~games

    fnulare
    Link
    I just want to add Simon Tatham's portable puzzle collection and I even looked up the iOS port for you. Not sure if this is something you'd be into, but as soon as someone is looking for anything...

    I just want to add Simon Tatham's portable puzzle collection and I even looked up the iOS port for you.

    Not sure if this is something you'd be into, but as soon as someone is looking for anything puzzle related this "needs" to be mentioned ;)

    7 votes

  17. Comment on Hi, how are you? Mental health support and discussion thread (August 2025) in ~health.mental

    fnulare
    Link
    Ugh! I don't know.... Today I had some kind of day, I've managed to do everything I decided to do (and it's a lot, Fridays are my household chores day), including one of my favourite things in...

    Ugh!

    I don't know....

    Today I had some kind of day, I've managed to do everything I decided to do (and it's a lot, Fridays are my household chores day), including one of my favourite things in life: to go swim (very loose definition of swimming) by myself in "my" lake at my favourite spot in the rain.

    I just feel sad and/or exhausted, like even on my best days my life just feels pointless, I just don't know.

    Maybe I'm über-depressed in ways I just don't understand, maybe I aimed too low for the day, maybe I don't look forward - like at all - to work tomorrow, maybe I feel lonely, maybe I have some kind of feelings around bringing home the last stuff from my dead mothers apartment?

    I don't know, I'm just sad.

    3 votes

  18. Comment on Famous cognitive psychology experiments that failed to replicate in ~science

    fnulare
    Link Parent
    You're right, I just interpreted it like that based on that these where selected and both "biggest disgraced results" and "many widely accepted results" where used by the article author to...

    I guess I'm uncertain why you reference being a cornerstone. I don't see that claim in the article?

    You're right, I just interpreted it like that based on that these where selected and both "biggest disgraced results" and "many widely accepted results" where used by the article author to describe the selection.

    But I really don't know anything about cognitive psychology, this was just my impression based on the article.

    2 votes

  19. Comment on Famous cognitive psychology experiments that failed to replicate in ~science

    fnulare
    Link
    This is not a field I'm particularly knowledgeable about... It is surprising to me that so much of the listed research is fairly new (very few items are from before 2010, and only 1 or 2 from last...

    This is not a field I'm particularly knowledgeable about...

    It is surprising to me that so much of the listed research is fairly new (very few items are from before 2010, and only 1 or 2 from last milleniun).

    At a glance I fail to see how it could be "corner stone" research of the field, but then again I know almost nothing of cognitive psychology.

    6 votes

  20. Comment on Do you play games in a play by email format, and if so what are you favorite games? in ~games

    fnulare
    Link Parent
    This is one of the games I grew up with that no one else ever has heard of! Thank you! Will check out both the app and the site :)

    This is one of the games I grew up with that no one else ever has heard of!

    Thank you! Will check out both the app and the site :)