I'm quick off the mark here because I was already typing out a very very similar new post, but my rant seemed to fit better with your post. Why is ADHD support so anti-ADHD? For but one example,...
I'm quick off the mark here because I was already typing out a very very similar new post, but my rant seemed to fit better with your post.
Why is ADHD support so anti-ADHD?
For but one example, ADHD medications are controlled drugs, in the UK at least, so cannot be prescribed long term. Each month those with a condition partly defined by poor short term memory have to remember to request a repeat prescription from their GP.
In order to obtain a repeat prescription I have to log in to the NHS app, a system so poorly designed there are five different screens to go through before being logged in. It is not possible to save any log in details and access the app with a PIN or biometrics, only full email address and password every time. Once in it's a challenge to navigate the unintuitive interface and find the repeat prescriptions page, then request a repeat prescription.
When notified that the repeat prescription has been approved...oh, sorry, only joking, there are no notifications. You have to remember to check the prescription has been approved. Will that be within an hour or in two weeks? Good question. Anyway, when it's been approved you go and collect it from the pharmacy, right? Kind of. First, you have to guess when the pharmacy is ready for you to collect it. Phone them to check? No. They're too busy to answer.
So this is one example of a large underfunded public body doing their best, but it's an observation I've made in many instances involving ADHD support.
I feel you. I once forayed into food banks and publicly funded therapy and public housing other similar social programs and ADHD meds feels a bit akin to it: it feels like the structure does not...
I feel you. I once forayed into food banks and publicly funded therapy and public housing other similar social programs and ADHD meds feels a bit akin to it: it feels like the structure does not trust us and it feels like it has preemptively made a negative judgement of my moral character.
That it's up to us to prove, monthly, that we aren't drug seeking addicts who are morally deficient in character and relying on drugs we don't need to do simple tasks that "everyone else" has no trouble doing. That the goal isn't to assist with our lives but rather to "ween us off of this moral deficiency into proper functionality"
It's like, don't give them food easily and with dignity or they might depend on it forever. Make them stand in the rain/wind/sun/snow for a few hours, don't let them choose items. The shame and inconvenience will encourage them to look for work and pay for it with money like we do, instead.
From my perceptions, dignity is something that is lacking in 'the system' as a whole in it's current state. I'm hard pressed to list examples where I can confidently say that I've seen someone be...
From my perceptions, dignity is something that is lacking in 'the system' as a whole in it's current state. I'm hard pressed to list examples where I can confidently say that I've seen someone be taken care of with dignity by the systems society has created to support or serve individuals.
I feel like from an American perspective, it's a two sided coin - the way American society is structured tends to encourage the pillaging of weakness. Abusing sales and free offerings and calling it savvy, burning your sanity for 'the hustle' to fulfill an abstract definition of success, skirting the law for tax returns being a virtue rather than a sin.
The myth of American exceptionalism is so heavily bought into, that any admission of weakness IS a moral failing. You are a citizen of this country, and thus anything but exceptionalism is an excuse, not a reality. You see this with every vulnerable population in the US, overcoming the adversity is the expectation, living with adversity that is beyond your control is a moral failing.
I know I went without ADHD meds for years while I skirted homelessness. I couldn't afford to donate blood to help ends meet because the plasma clinics were overwhelmed with people selling their body for small sums of cash. Having worked with food banks and soup kitchens in the past, I shuddered to take resources from someone who actually needed food in spite of their circumstances, as I judged my crippling dysfunction, depression, and anxiety as a moral failing.
My mother would always make it a point that she had the same conditions without treatment, and that I had no excuse not to perform as well as she did. She was very ADHD, and struggled through traumatic abuse and poverty, so of course others should be able to do the same. My family has been greatly impacted by mental health issues, with multiple of my family members having been committed to mental institutions over the years, and mental health is something I was always told to take with the utmost seriousness.
I agree, even within my own self perception, there is a loathing of weakness. Needing help is bothering others who are succeeding, dragging them down. Dependency is anathema to 'rugged individualism', an uncomfortable challenging of an ideal foisted upon us to excuse the gutting of community and social services, the eviceration of responsibility to others.
We are, by nature, an existence that is an uncomfortable truth in a flawed construct that demands uniformity, and that construct will harshly strip the dignity of those that do not conform to it's self serving expectations.
It probably doesn't help that some ADHD meds can be used recreationally, or by neurotypicals looking for a boost. I used to get weird looks from pharmacists when I was younger. Nowadays you can...
It probably doesn't help that some ADHD meds can be used recreationally, or by neurotypicals looking for a boost. I used to get weird looks from pharmacists when I was younger.
Nowadays you can get your meds for free if you're a kid.
Even here in Australia, trying to get an adult ADHD diagnosis is insanely hard. People are faced with six-month waiting lists for a psychiatrist appointment - if they can get a referral at all...
Even here in Australia, trying to get an adult ADHD diagnosis is insanely hard. People are faced with six-month waiting lists for a psychiatrist appointment - if they can get a referral at all because psychiatrists are in extremely high demand.
Then they're faced with months of psychiatrist appointments to actually get a diagnosis, which can cost thousands of Dollars, even after the Medicare rebate.
If they're unlucky and end up with a bad psychiatrist who won't diagnose them properly or prescribe reasonable medication, then they're back to square one and have to start the process all over again.
Australia's health care system is pretty good, but the way it treats people with ADHD is cruel. It's almost as if it's designed to be as hard and demoralising as possible for people with ADHD.
If you're a low income earner with ADHD, then it's even worse. You may find that you simply can't afford to seek a diagnosis, even if it would improve your finances in the long term.
Luckily, a government inquiry into the barriers to ADHD diagnosis has finally been launched, and there have been some great community submissions. Hopefully this will result in improvements to the system.
I recently heard from an aquaintance in England that a friend of theirs was told it would be a 2-3 year process until assessment. Adult. I thought 6-12 months in my country, from first appointment...
I recently heard from an aquaintance in England that a friend of theirs was told it would be a 2-3 year process until assessment. Adult.
I thought 6-12 months in my country, from first appointment where you voice your concerns to your doctor until you get to the point of assessment with the specialist, was horribly long. But several years because of lack of public funding and prioritation of mental health care facilities? Nightmare. Particularly because of how you don't usually ask for this until after your life is falling apart and you start to realise that something has been wrong for a long, long time already.
It's not due to a lack of professionals. You can get a private facility to assess you within a few weeks to a few months, anywhere in the world. England too. Just a lack of desirable working conditions for them within the public health care system. Often as basic as no facilities and positions to begin with, before even considering the pay rate or anything like that.
It's one of those glorious neruodiverse taxes on our time and very specific bullshit we have to deal with. I hear you man. I don't react well to adhd meds so I came off them and generally cope via...
It's one of those glorious neruodiverse taxes on our time and very specific bullshit we have to deal with. I hear you man.
I don't react well to adhd meds so I came off them and generally cope via a few other methods. But my God did the stress vanish when I got past having to speak to a psyche or gp every damn month.
I read your comment and I don't have any valuable insights, but this is a talk thread and I just wanted to say I hear you, I see you trying and I see you struggling, and I hope that you will very...
I read your comment and I don't have any valuable insights, but this is a talk thread and I just wanted to say I hear you, I see you trying and I see you struggling, and I hope that you will very quickly find much less stressful and much more meaningful work. It super sucks looking for work, hang in there.
Are you blasting applications? Tailored or template? Do you bother applying to specific site ones or just job board? Maybe I should ask on a specific job search thread.
You mentioned a TikTok with a list of sites for job searching. Considering your ADHD I'm going to put my list in text form it helps it stick or jogs your memory. Endevis ZipRecruiter Indeed...
You mentioned a TikTok with a list of sites for job searching. Considering your ADHD I'm going to put my list in text form it helps it stick or jogs your memory.
You also mentioned not knowing how to break into the IT industry, but seem to have a ton of experience from a self teaching. I would make sure you leverage that on your resume when applying for positions.
I leaned heavily on my transferable skills on my resume and landed an interview in a different commodity for automotive supplier this way. I then got to talk about my personal project when it was brought up from my resume, which was tangentially related to the job to show my "commitment" and "passion"
On a final note, have you considered a move to the Midwest? Your LA money would likely go a long way, and IT professionals are always in demand.
I've (again) come to realize just how little sense I make to other people. It's extremely frustrating feeling that, oh have been just been nodding along/off when I talk? Years ago, one of my...
I've (again) come to realize just how little sense I make to other people.
It's extremely frustrating feeling that, oh have been just been nodding along/off when I talk?
Years ago, one of my friends said the first time he met me he genuinely thought I was on drugs, I was at a show & I was very anxious about some of the people in the room who I had awkward interactions with in the past (nothing noteworthy, but I fixated), I couldn't look straight, I would start 5 different topics. And my buddy was just nodding along. I assumed he was listening, & responding, but I'm starting to realize I can't get my ideas across without tons of attempts. Not to mention the shame that comes with this realization!
Anyways, this is a daily experience for me, I mumble because I don't think people are listening anyways, I don't finish my sentences because I get bored of them, and worst of all, my ideas are lost all together. At work I've tried a few times to explain (what I think are good) ideas, to get flat-out rejected without getting thoughtfully considered.
My boss is thankfully trying to help me in this, and I think I'm starting to work out what's happening.
In my head, I have between 3-5+ trains of thought running at all times. When its code, I am thinking about the problem from many angles, when I'm typing I'm thinking about the conclusion, middle & end at the same time. I start to see patterns arise from these different angles, and I'm really really happy with a particular solution that solves the problem at 3+(!) angles that has X(!) potential. I spend all my time thinking developing these 3 angles, and then when I propose it I am pitching in the same fashion as I came up with it - here's this potential look at how well thought out that is, oh wait don't forget about this, oh wait, ... They are lost, and they are nodding along & they won't tell me that they are lost!
This is incredibly frustrating.
I realize the basic problem, I'm hoping they can get in my head & operate.. well they can't, in fact its very hard for anyone to get into someone else's head.
Instead I need a different route, when I'm proposing a solution I'm trying to present it this way:
1 - Here is the EXACT problem I'm facing
2 - See how hard it is to do this thing?
3 - ^ see it??
4 - ok you see it, I feel like I'm missing X from here.. - let them get on the angle I'm starting to go on
5 - either they come up with the same solution, or I slowly start to do what-if-isms.
This is still very very hard for me, I've yet to do this successfully.
It's almost as if I need to do the hard work of getting into other people's head if I hope them to get into mine. Shit's hard.
For once in my life, I feel like I am managing ADHD in a healthy manner and have managed to wrestle some form of control and discipline over my actions. I think the pandemic and time being...
For once in my life, I feel like I am managing ADHD in a healthy manner and have managed to wrestle some form of control and discipline over my actions. I think the pandemic and time being unemployed as an adult really helped me re-calibrate my headspace enough to understand better just how I should be functioning, and not trying to jam a square peg in a round hole.
I'm also happy to say that I've figured out how to properly manage my ADHD without requiring medications. I tried various types of prescriptions to help manage it, but in reality I think it was more that I was just a bad fit for my job. It was stressful enough to consistently send me down anxiety/depression spirals that made me basically useless. I am thankful for being afforded the luxury of finding who I was as an adult while being supported by my loving wife and searching for a new job in a new country. I've managed to find myself in a management position where I can harness my ADHD for my benefit as opposed to a ball and chain clamped around my leg. I look forward to seeing where I can grow and take this momentum in the future.
After moving, getting married, getting my first real job in a new career, I’m just trying to get my shit together and get back into that nice scheduled groove. My anxiety with all the chaos has...
After moving, getting married, getting my first real job in a new career, I’m just trying to get my shit together and get back into that nice scheduled groove. My anxiety with all the chaos has left me depressed and irritable when I should be happy with all that’s going right for once. I’ve been late to work almost everyday this week though, it’s hard to get back those good habits where I’m showered, dressed to impress, and on time…it takes such work for me to get into that headspace instead of rolling out of bed, putting shitty clothes on, and still I’m late because my time management is so shit.
I’m also tired from all of the chaos and anxiety and all I want to do when I go home is flop on the couch and zone out watching TV (mostly YouTube). It’s depressing. I want to read, play video games, cook good food, go out and explore my new surroundings but I just can’t find the willpower.
Today marks my second day going for a 45 min swim though and that is making me happy for how hard is to get back into an exercise routine. I took a 6 month break after everything was going on and I really need to get back to it, for my health, weight, and happiness. So that’s a positive progress there…
Drugs never worked for me and in fact I developed quite a habit when I was prescribed Adderall, it was not therapeutic but drug abuse for me. The only thing that works for me is mind over matter, developing my good habits and sticking to them with lots of reminders and alarms. It’s not what some people like to hear, that I’ve abandoned medication and therapy but it’s what has worked for me.
I have a problem where I end up with many piles of small items, categorized sort of, but only in a way that makes sense to me. And they are everywhere. When a pile becomes less relevant, it goes...
I have a problem where I end up with many piles of small items, categorized sort of, but only in a way that makes sense to me. And they are everywhere. When a pile becomes less relevant, it goes into a box. Then it might as well be banished to the void because I don't look at it again until I need something. And I'll remember exactly which box it's in, but digging around makes a mess. I have all these cabinets and book shelves that are more or less empty, and boxes and piles of things stacked on the floor of each room, or covering my coffee table and countertops.
So my latest fixation has been to dump out one box at a time and sort them and put things away. If they don't have a place, they go in donate (or storage). My donate boxes are now 4 medium moving boxes plus 3 small house objects. I am very proud of this accomplishment, and grateful to have the downtime to do it because of a hybrid remote role :)
I want to keep making my house nice instead of just hoarding and categorizing things but it is truly a neverending process. I wish it was something I could do once, and not think about again, but I am accepting that I just have to do it regularly to keep the piles in check. Like weekly house scan of what needs to be put away.. very frustrating.
I am not diagnosed with adhd or autism but I don't really know. I was diagnosed with severe generalized anxiety and panic disorder early on and was constantly getting in trouble for not paying attention or "mouthing off" aka disagreeing with an adult or drawing in my textbooks. I gave up on asking for help by high school (it is impossible to get help for anything when every doctor says that you just have anxiety and need to avoid doing things that cause stress, like what?). I have an autistic friend who thinks I should see a doctor about it because of how many symptoms of adhd I exhibit, and my last boss also gave me that feedback because he has severe adhd and said he thought maybe I did too based on my work habits. I definitely tend to seek out jobs that have a lot of chaos and "firefighting". But at this point in life I just don't see what having a diagnosis would do for me? I also just reeeeeeally don't trust doctors. I trust therapists though.
Also been replaying Oblivion on PS5 and really enjoying remembering how fun and stupid it was and collecting all the nirnroots.
Hiya, ADHD here. I was diagnosed as a teenager and built several coping strategies, so it's honestly quite manageable nowadays. Im one of the lucky few to have a working medication/therapy support...
Hiya, ADHD here. I was diagnosed as a teenager and built several coping strategies, so it's honestly quite manageable nowadays. Im one of the lucky few to have a working medication/therapy support network in place, so I manage to stay on the rails (depression issues aside).
Last few days I've spent under a rock. I'm at a point in my life where I can do that, as I graduate university soon and my course load is low. The reason I spent 3 days talking to nobody? A new random fixation :p. I've been trying to take a deeper dive into Nintendo Switch modding, and a module that disables the TLS verification caught my eye. So I've spent the past few days scrounging up resources about Nintendo servers, and monitoring traffic to the resources that aren't so well documented. It's really neat, and I won't lie, it is tempting to try and implement my own version of this server infrastructure to "puppet" my switch. Maybe if by some miracle I find enough information. Could be cool.
That said if anyone has valuable insight about this, feel free to chat, I'd love to talk about it. I can't simply dump these thoughts into a discord or something, as the culture of a "chat client" is different... Maybe I need to return to forums.
I’ve been diagnosed (and have been suffering for a while, unbeknownst to me) with ADHD a little while ago. I’ve been prescribed both adderall and concerta without the FD/neurologist checking back...
I’ve been diagnosed (and have been suffering for a while, unbeknownst to me) with ADHD a little while ago. I’ve been prescribed both adderall and concerta without the FD/neurologist checking back on me or whether the drugs work or help at all.
So basically they just shove synthetic drugs down my throat, but checking whether CBD (not THC) oil might help is a big no-no.
Look I hit up Mary Jane every day, but I feel it's important to point out that the "synthetic drug" stigma or "natural vs chemical" debate is devoid of reason. There is nothing malicious about...
So basically they just shove synthetic drugs down my throat, but checking whether CBD (not THC) oil might help is a big no-no.
Look I hit up Mary Jane every day, but I feel it's important to point out that the "synthetic drug" stigma or "natural vs chemical" debate is devoid of reason. There is nothing malicious about synthesized compounds. The fact that some chemicals occur naturally does not make them better, safer, or purer in any way.
It is not my intention to take away from your point, this just happens to be a huge pet peeve of mine. The pharmaceutical industry, the cost of drugs, the prescribing habits of doctors, those are separate topics deserving of their own discussion. I understand you've had less than stellar experiences with prescription drugs (I use illicit substances to supplement my prescription drugs every single day of my life, I get it), but don't write them all off because they're synthesized rather than harvested from plant matter.
I'm ADHD, bipolar, and schizoid. Well, my 78-year-old mother-in-law is bedridden, requiring 24h care, pooping in a diaper, alternating between catatonia and delirium. Her house is relatively...
I'm ADHD, bipolar, and schizoid.
What's on your mind?
Well, my 78-year-old mother-in-law is bedridden, requiring 24h care, pooping in a diaper, alternating between catatonia and delirium. Her house is relatively independent, but also connected to ours. It's a struggle to get her to eat and drink water. My 8 months pregnant partner cries pretty much every day. This is not the pregnancy she dreamed of. My mother-in-law is probably going to be committed to a mental institution, which will completely deplete our financial reserves at the very worst time. The money will eventually get back to us due to an injunction against her health insurance, but until that happens we are going to suffer a bit. It's a grim situation, but we're very anxious to see our kid's face. It's a pretty big silver lining.
Need to vent?
Probably, yes. But I won't. I don't really do emotions.
What's your latest hyperfixation?
Maybe that question is more for ASD people? I don't seem to have a fixation at the moment. I've been meditating 2 times a day and I'm also trying to control my breathing so I can be more in the moment, and the results are great. There's not much I can do to help with my mother-in-law's situation, so I figured that by keeping myself calm and centered I can be a positive presence in the house.
I've been seen my therapist for 2 years now? Maybe? She's been great so far. But after many sessions, she brought up the possibility that I might be autistic. I told her that maybe I had issues as...
I've been seen my therapist for 2 years now? Maybe? She's been great so far.
But after many sessions, she brought up the possibility that I might be autistic. I told her that maybe I had issues as a kid, but I'm fine with human interaction now. I'm so fine with it that many of my friends would be surprised if I were to mention autism. So I was reluctant to accept it.
Not that being autistic is bad, my siblings have suspected, and my parents got me checked as a kid but no diagnosis. But I'm very "normal" now that I don't want to undermine the struggles that Autistic people go through. I pass really well as a regular socialising person.
But what I learned from her was that Autism studies tend to be geared towards males and the stereotypical view of what Autism looks like isn't that way for everyone. Apparently females and other genders tend to do a thing called Masking and don't get diagnosed as much.
She also said that people with Autism can learn. Just because I've developed ways to interact with people now, doesn't negate the fact I had issues before.
She gave me things to read up and a lot of things seemed to fit. But I'm still uncomfortable with self-diagnosing so we settled on at least Neurodivergent.
I was okay with that because she pointed out that I sounded like I was having sensory issues. Being easily overwhelmed by light and sound.
I bought myself noise cancelling headphones and it has helped a lot. I've also begun noticing when sound would start to affect me and remove myself from the situation before I get bad anxiety problems.
I used to think my anxiety was sometimes random.
So yea. Sure. Probably Neurodivergent.
I don't know. I say probably because I feel like I'm lying to myself.
I'm wondering how other undiagnosed people feel about their situation.
I haven't been officially diagnosed so I go with the neurodivergent label, but I have also discovered this as an adult because of course the standard way it's covered in the media is so different...
I haven't been officially diagnosed so I go with the neurodivergent label, but I have also discovered this as an adult because of course the standard way it's covered in the media is so different I would've never thought to relate to being on the spectrum or having ADHD. This realization was a big one, it caused a bit of an identity crisis for a while during a not-so-ideal time in my life. There were so many things I considered to be a preference that happened to fit in with being neurodiverse. Being very annoyed by loud noises and people? That was sensory overload. Being anxious about talking to people and rehearsing scripts in my head so it would turn out fine? Also something people on the spectrum do. Group conversations hard to follow? Same thing. Having obsessive interests where I spent way more time on it compared to anyone else I knew did on their hobbies? That was called having a special interest. Preferring to be direct when talking to people instead of saying something else and expecting them to interpret what's said between the lines? That's also what being on the spectrum is. Not adhering to gendered norms? That was just me not understanding the neurotypical social world. Turns out not every teen reads books on body language for fun. I think my interest in reading and consuming fictional media was me trying to understand how others 'normally' worked and emulating it. Hell, I still do it, it's just more conscious than unconscious now.
I have no way to get diagnosed where I am and it's a bit confusing navigating this on my own since I suspect I also have alexithymia (a condition where you have trouble recognizing, expressing, and describing your own emotions). But I read up on it to understand myself more and also read through the experiences of others (much more helpful than some research studies - there's a shocking amount of discrimination in them, which knowing how medical research has treated women and minorities is also not shocking). It's been a bit of a journey and it's an ongoing one but knowing that I am neurodiverse has given me an understanding in my life that I didn't have before and honestly, I'm more confident in myself. I can make accommodations to make myself more comfortable, like wearing earbuds anywhere it's too loud or wearing clothing that won't feel wrong on my skin. If things do go wrong or if I mess up in situations, I just go easy on myself. Even when I do mask, I know I'm doing it and know why so it doesn't feel wrong to have to 'put on an act'.
I hope this is also a positive journey of self-discovery for you that also helps you feel more comfortable with yourself.
Both of you might want to check out Unmasking Autism by Devon Price. There may be parts of it (possibly big parts) that you don't find relevant to your own situation, but then again you may be...
Both of you might want to check out Unmasking Autism by Devon Price. There may be parts of it (possibly big parts) that you don't find relevant to your own situation, but then again you may be surprised. Word of warning, though: it's very opinionated and very political, which can be turn-offs for some people.
I've seen it recommended a lot and I read a bit of it before dropping off. I might pick it up again sometime and finish it but when I tried reading it, it was another resource from an American...
I've seen it recommended a lot and I read a bit of it before dropping off. I might pick it up again sometime and finish it but when I tried reading it, it was another resource from an American perspective and I didn't have the energy to make the effort to try to decipher it and translate what it might mean from my cultural perspective. I have nothing against the book, it does seem to be insightful and I'll probably find plenty to relate to in it, it just was another thing that I was not the direct target audience for at the time so I wasn't motivated to read it all the way through. But thank you for the recommendation still, I appreciate it.
Diagnosed as a child and medicated through school. Let special authorities lapse on the transition from child health to adult psychiatry. Failed two attempts at engineering degrees (to broad) and...
Diagnosed as a child and medicated through school. Let special authorities lapse on the transition from child health to adult psychiatry.
Failed two attempts at engineering degrees (to broad) and completed a more narrowly scoped BSc in computer science.
Now in mid thirties I am doing ok mostly just floating on.
My adhd really presents itself when trying to do anything non-technical. Not only is it a generally foreign concept, but the independence development plan (goal setting) at work is a massive pain in the arse to even want to do.
Finally got around to booking a GP to try and start getting medicated again. At least to see what difference it makes.
After 5 years, I decided to switch from Vyvanse back to Adderall because: • Vyvanse gave me a shorter temper. Not enough to cause problems in everyday life, but noticable. • Possible sleeping...
After 5 years, I decided to switch from Vyvanse back to Adderall because:
• Vyvanse gave me a shorter temper. Not enough to cause problems in everyday life, but noticable.
• Possible sleeping issues. Getting more than 6.5 hours is very very difficult.
After about 9 days back on Adderall, I can say that Adderall has definitely helped with my temperament, but absolutely destroyed my ability to sleep. My RLS has gotten worse, and I haven't gotten more than 4 hours of consecutive sleep without 20mg worth of edibles. I'm hoping everything will right itself in the next 4-5 days, otherwise I don't know what I'll do.
I'm narcoleptic (clinically diagnosed type-2). I've been unable to get the stimulants I need to function for several months now. Sleep attacks are very frequent. At the same time, there's a lot...
I'm narcoleptic (clinically diagnosed type-2). I've been unable to get the stimulants I need to function for several months now. Sleep attacks are very frequent. At the same time, there's a lot going on in my personal life that I don't have the energy to address. It makes my already low mood much worse. I'm struggling to survive.
I'm quick off the mark here because I was already typing out a very very similar new post, but my rant seemed to fit better with your post.
Why is ADHD support so anti-ADHD?
For but one example, ADHD medications are controlled drugs, in the UK at least, so cannot be prescribed long term. Each month those with a condition partly defined by poor short term memory have to remember to request a repeat prescription from their GP.
In order to obtain a repeat prescription I have to log in to the NHS app, a system so poorly designed there are five different screens to go through before being logged in. It is not possible to save any log in details and access the app with a PIN or biometrics, only full email address and password every time. Once in it's a challenge to navigate the unintuitive interface and find the repeat prescriptions page, then request a repeat prescription.
When notified that the repeat prescription has been approved...oh, sorry, only joking, there are no notifications. You have to remember to check the prescription has been approved. Will that be within an hour or in two weeks? Good question. Anyway, when it's been approved you go and collect it from the pharmacy, right? Kind of. First, you have to guess when the pharmacy is ready for you to collect it. Phone them to check? No. They're too busy to answer.
So this is one example of a large underfunded public body doing their best, but it's an observation I've made in many instances involving ADHD support.
I feel you. I once forayed into food banks and publicly funded therapy and public housing other similar social programs and ADHD meds feels a bit akin to it: it feels like the structure does not trust us and it feels like it has preemptively made a negative judgement of my moral character.
That it's up to us to prove, monthly, that we aren't drug seeking addicts who are morally deficient in character and relying on drugs we don't need to do simple tasks that "everyone else" has no trouble doing. That the goal isn't to assist with our lives but rather to "ween us off of this moral deficiency into proper functionality"
It's like, don't give them food easily and with dignity or they might depend on it forever. Make them stand in the rain/wind/sun/snow for a few hours, don't let them choose items. The shame and inconvenience will encourage them to look for work and pay for it with money like we do, instead.
From my perceptions, dignity is something that is lacking in 'the system' as a whole in it's current state. I'm hard pressed to list examples where I can confidently say that I've seen someone be taken care of with dignity by the systems society has created to support or serve individuals.
I feel like from an American perspective, it's a two sided coin - the way American society is structured tends to encourage the pillaging of weakness. Abusing sales and free offerings and calling it savvy, burning your sanity for 'the hustle' to fulfill an abstract definition of success, skirting the law for tax returns being a virtue rather than a sin.
The myth of American exceptionalism is so heavily bought into, that any admission of weakness IS a moral failing. You are a citizen of this country, and thus anything but exceptionalism is an excuse, not a reality. You see this with every vulnerable population in the US, overcoming the adversity is the expectation, living with adversity that is beyond your control is a moral failing.
I know I went without ADHD meds for years while I skirted homelessness. I couldn't afford to donate blood to help ends meet because the plasma clinics were overwhelmed with people selling their body for small sums of cash. Having worked with food banks and soup kitchens in the past, I shuddered to take resources from someone who actually needed food in spite of their circumstances, as I judged my crippling dysfunction, depression, and anxiety as a moral failing.
My mother would always make it a point that she had the same conditions without treatment, and that I had no excuse not to perform as well as she did. She was very ADHD, and struggled through traumatic abuse and poverty, so of course others should be able to do the same. My family has been greatly impacted by mental health issues, with multiple of my family members having been committed to mental institutions over the years, and mental health is something I was always told to take with the utmost seriousness.
I agree, even within my own self perception, there is a loathing of weakness. Needing help is bothering others who are succeeding, dragging them down. Dependency is anathema to 'rugged individualism', an uncomfortable challenging of an ideal foisted upon us to excuse the gutting of community and social services, the eviceration of responsibility to others.
We are, by nature, an existence that is an uncomfortable truth in a flawed construct that demands uniformity, and that construct will harshly strip the dignity of those that do not conform to it's self serving expectations.
It probably doesn't help that some ADHD meds can be used recreationally, or by neurotypicals looking for a boost. I used to get weird looks from pharmacists when I was younger.
Nowadays you can get your meds for free if you're a kid.
Even here in Australia, trying to get an adult ADHD diagnosis is insanely hard. People are faced with six-month waiting lists for a psychiatrist appointment - if they can get a referral at all because psychiatrists are in extremely high demand.
Then they're faced with months of psychiatrist appointments to actually get a diagnosis, which can cost thousands of Dollars, even after the Medicare rebate.
If they're unlucky and end up with a bad psychiatrist who won't diagnose them properly or prescribe reasonable medication, then they're back to square one and have to start the process all over again.
Australia's health care system is pretty good, but the way it treats people with ADHD is cruel. It's almost as if it's designed to be as hard and demoralising as possible for people with ADHD.
If you're a low income earner with ADHD, then it's even worse. You may find that you simply can't afford to seek a diagnosis, even if it would improve your finances in the long term.
Luckily, a government inquiry into the barriers to ADHD diagnosis has finally been launched, and there have been some great community submissions. Hopefully this will result in improvements to the system.
I recently heard from an aquaintance in England that a friend of theirs was told it would be a 2-3 year process until assessment. Adult.
I thought 6-12 months in my country, from first appointment where you voice your concerns to your doctor until you get to the point of assessment with the specialist, was horribly long. But several years because of lack of public funding and prioritation of mental health care facilities? Nightmare. Particularly because of how you don't usually ask for this until after your life is falling apart and you start to realise that something has been wrong for a long, long time already.
It's not due to a lack of professionals. You can get a private facility to assess you within a few weeks to a few months, anywhere in the world. England too. Just a lack of desirable working conditions for them within the public health care system. Often as basic as no facilities and positions to begin with, before even considering the pay rate or anything like that.
It's one of those glorious neruodiverse taxes on our time and very specific bullshit we have to deal with. I hear you man.
I don't react well to adhd meds so I came off them and generally cope via a few other methods. But my God did the stress vanish when I got past having to speak to a psyche or gp every damn month.
Same in Australia. Really annoying i need a prescription just to sleep on time.
I read your comment and I don't have any valuable insights, but this is a talk thread and I just wanted to say I hear you, I see you trying and I see you struggling, and I hope that you will very quickly find much less stressful and much more meaningful work. It super sucks looking for work, hang in there.
Are you blasting applications? Tailored or template? Do you bother applying to specific site ones or just job board? Maybe I should ask on a specific job search thread.
You mentioned a TikTok with a list of sites for job searching. Considering your ADHD I'm going to put my list in text form it helps it stick or jogs your memory.
Endevis
ZipRecruiter
Indeed
CareerBuilder
Monster
LinkedIn
You also mentioned not knowing how to break into the IT industry, but seem to have a ton of experience from a self teaching. I would make sure you leverage that on your resume when applying for positions.
I leaned heavily on my transferable skills on my resume and landed an interview in a different commodity for automotive supplier this way. I then got to talk about my personal project when it was brought up from my resume, which was tangentially related to the job to show my "commitment" and "passion"
On a final note, have you considered a move to the Midwest? Your LA money would likely go a long way, and IT professionals are always in demand.
I've (again) come to realize just how little sense I make to other people.
It's extremely frustrating feeling that, oh have been just been nodding along/off when I talk?
Years ago, one of my friends said the first time he met me he genuinely thought I was on drugs, I was at a show & I was very anxious about some of the people in the room who I had awkward interactions with in the past (nothing noteworthy, but I fixated), I couldn't look straight, I would start 5 different topics. And my buddy was just nodding along. I assumed he was listening, & responding, but I'm starting to realize I can't get my ideas across without tons of attempts. Not to mention the shame that comes with this realization!
Anyways, this is a daily experience for me, I mumble because I don't think people are listening anyways, I don't finish my sentences because I get bored of them, and worst of all, my ideas are lost all together. At work I've tried a few times to explain (what I think are good) ideas, to get flat-out rejected without getting thoughtfully considered.
My boss is thankfully trying to help me in this, and I think I'm starting to work out what's happening.
In my head, I have between 3-5+ trains of thought running at all times. When its code, I am thinking about the problem from many angles, when I'm typing I'm thinking about the conclusion, middle & end at the same time. I start to see patterns arise from these different angles, and I'm really really happy with a particular solution that solves the problem at 3+(!) angles that has X(!) potential. I spend all my time thinking developing these 3 angles, and then when I propose it I am pitching in the same fashion as I came up with it - here's this potential look at how well thought out that is, oh wait don't forget about this, oh wait, ... They are lost, and they are nodding along & they won't tell me that they are lost!
This is incredibly frustrating.
I realize the basic problem, I'm hoping they can get in my head & operate.. well they can't, in fact its very hard for anyone to get into someone else's head.
Instead I need a different route, when I'm proposing a solution I'm trying to present it this way:
1 - Here is the EXACT problem I'm facing
2 - See how hard it is to do this thing?
3 - ^ see it??
4 - ok you see it, I feel like I'm missing X from here.. - let them get on the angle I'm starting to go on
5 - either they come up with the same solution, or I slowly start to do what-if-isms.
This is still very very hard for me, I've yet to do this successfully.
It's almost as if I need to do the hard work of getting into other people's head if I hope them to get into mine. Shit's hard.
For once in my life, I feel like I am managing ADHD in a healthy manner and have managed to wrestle some form of control and discipline over my actions. I think the pandemic and time being unemployed as an adult really helped me re-calibrate my headspace enough to understand better just how I should be functioning, and not trying to jam a square peg in a round hole.
I'm also happy to say that I've figured out how to properly manage my ADHD without requiring medications. I tried various types of prescriptions to help manage it, but in reality I think it was more that I was just a bad fit for my job. It was stressful enough to consistently send me down anxiety/depression spirals that made me basically useless. I am thankful for being afforded the luxury of finding who I was as an adult while being supported by my loving wife and searching for a new job in a new country. I've managed to find myself in a management position where I can harness my ADHD for my benefit as opposed to a ball and chain clamped around my leg. I look forward to seeing where I can grow and take this momentum in the future.
After moving, getting married, getting my first real job in a new career, I’m just trying to get my shit together and get back into that nice scheduled groove. My anxiety with all the chaos has left me depressed and irritable when I should be happy with all that’s going right for once. I’ve been late to work almost everyday this week though, it’s hard to get back those good habits where I’m showered, dressed to impress, and on time…it takes such work for me to get into that headspace instead of rolling out of bed, putting shitty clothes on, and still I’m late because my time management is so shit.
I’m also tired from all of the chaos and anxiety and all I want to do when I go home is flop on the couch and zone out watching TV (mostly YouTube). It’s depressing. I want to read, play video games, cook good food, go out and explore my new surroundings but I just can’t find the willpower.
Today marks my second day going for a 45 min swim though and that is making me happy for how hard is to get back into an exercise routine. I took a 6 month break after everything was going on and I really need to get back to it, for my health, weight, and happiness. So that’s a positive progress there…
Drugs never worked for me and in fact I developed quite a habit when I was prescribed Adderall, it was not therapeutic but drug abuse for me. The only thing that works for me is mind over matter, developing my good habits and sticking to them with lots of reminders and alarms. It’s not what some people like to hear, that I’ve abandoned medication and therapy but it’s what has worked for me.
I have a problem where I end up with many piles of small items, categorized sort of, but only in a way that makes sense to me. And they are everywhere. When a pile becomes less relevant, it goes into a box. Then it might as well be banished to the void because I don't look at it again until I need something. And I'll remember exactly which box it's in, but digging around makes a mess. I have all these cabinets and book shelves that are more or less empty, and boxes and piles of things stacked on the floor of each room, or covering my coffee table and countertops.
So my latest fixation has been to dump out one box at a time and sort them and put things away. If they don't have a place, they go in donate (or storage). My donate boxes are now 4 medium moving boxes plus 3 small house objects. I am very proud of this accomplishment, and grateful to have the downtime to do it because of a hybrid remote role :)
I want to keep making my house nice instead of just hoarding and categorizing things but it is truly a neverending process. I wish it was something I could do once, and not think about again, but I am accepting that I just have to do it regularly to keep the piles in check. Like weekly house scan of what needs to be put away.. very frustrating.
I am not diagnosed with adhd or autism but I don't really know. I was diagnosed with severe generalized anxiety and panic disorder early on and was constantly getting in trouble for not paying attention or "mouthing off" aka disagreeing with an adult or drawing in my textbooks. I gave up on asking for help by high school (it is impossible to get help for anything when every doctor says that you just have anxiety and need to avoid doing things that cause stress, like what?). I have an autistic friend who thinks I should see a doctor about it because of how many symptoms of adhd I exhibit, and my last boss also gave me that feedback because he has severe adhd and said he thought maybe I did too based on my work habits. I definitely tend to seek out jobs that have a lot of chaos and "firefighting". But at this point in life I just don't see what having a diagnosis would do for me? I also just reeeeeeally don't trust doctors. I trust therapists though.
Also been replaying Oblivion on PS5 and really enjoying remembering how fun and stupid it was and collecting all the nirnroots.
Hiya, ADHD here. I was diagnosed as a teenager and built several coping strategies, so it's honestly quite manageable nowadays. Im one of the lucky few to have a working medication/therapy support network in place, so I manage to stay on the rails (depression issues aside).
Last few days I've spent under a rock. I'm at a point in my life where I can do that, as I graduate university soon and my course load is low. The reason I spent 3 days talking to nobody? A new random fixation :p. I've been trying to take a deeper dive into Nintendo Switch modding, and a module that disables the TLS verification caught my eye. So I've spent the past few days scrounging up resources about Nintendo servers, and monitoring traffic to the resources that aren't so well documented. It's really neat, and I won't lie, it is tempting to try and implement my own version of this server infrastructure to "puppet" my switch. Maybe if by some miracle I find enough information. Could be cool.
That said if anyone has valuable insight about this, feel free to chat, I'd love to talk about it. I can't simply dump these thoughts into a discord or something, as the culture of a "chat client" is different... Maybe I need to return to forums.
I’ve been diagnosed (and have been suffering for a while, unbeknownst to me) with ADHD a little while ago. I’ve been prescribed both adderall and concerta without the FD/neurologist checking back on me or whether the drugs work or help at all.
So basically they just shove synthetic drugs down my throat, but checking whether CBD (not THC) oil might help is a big no-no.
Look I hit up Mary Jane every day, but I feel it's important to point out that the "synthetic drug" stigma or "natural vs chemical" debate is devoid of reason. There is nothing malicious about synthesized compounds. The fact that some chemicals occur naturally does not make them better, safer, or purer in any way.
It is not my intention to take away from your point, this just happens to be a huge pet peeve of mine. The pharmaceutical industry, the cost of drugs, the prescribing habits of doctors, those are separate topics deserving of their own discussion. I understand you've had less than stellar experiences with prescription drugs (I use illicit substances to supplement my prescription drugs every single day of my life, I get it), but don't write them all off because they're synthesized rather than harvested from plant matter.
I'm ADHD, bipolar, and schizoid.
Well, my 78-year-old mother-in-law is bedridden, requiring 24h care, pooping in a diaper, alternating between catatonia and delirium. Her house is relatively independent, but also connected to ours. It's a struggle to get her to eat and drink water. My 8 months pregnant partner cries pretty much every day. This is not the pregnancy she dreamed of. My mother-in-law is probably going to be committed to a mental institution, which will completely deplete our financial reserves at the very worst time. The money will eventually get back to us due to an injunction against her health insurance, but until that happens we are going to suffer a bit. It's a grim situation, but we're very anxious to see our kid's face. It's a pretty big silver lining.
Probably, yes. But I won't. I don't really do emotions.
Maybe that question is more for ASD people? I don't seem to have a fixation at the moment. I've been meditating 2 times a day and I'm also trying to control my breathing so I can be more in the moment, and the results are great. There's not much I can do to help with my mother-in-law's situation, so I figured that by keeping myself calm and centered I can be a positive presence in the house.
I'm watching a lot of Monk.
I've been seen my therapist for 2 years now? Maybe? She's been great so far.
But after many sessions, she brought up the possibility that I might be autistic. I told her that maybe I had issues as a kid, but I'm fine with human interaction now. I'm so fine with it that many of my friends would be surprised if I were to mention autism. So I was reluctant to accept it.
Not that being autistic is bad, my siblings have suspected, and my parents got me checked as a kid but no diagnosis. But I'm very "normal" now that I don't want to undermine the struggles that Autistic people go through. I pass really well as a regular socialising person.
But what I learned from her was that Autism studies tend to be geared towards males and the stereotypical view of what Autism looks like isn't that way for everyone. Apparently females and other genders tend to do a thing called Masking and don't get diagnosed as much.
She also said that people with Autism can learn. Just because I've developed ways to interact with people now, doesn't negate the fact I had issues before.
She gave me things to read up and a lot of things seemed to fit. But I'm still uncomfortable with self-diagnosing so we settled on at least Neurodivergent.
I was okay with that because she pointed out that I sounded like I was having sensory issues. Being easily overwhelmed by light and sound.
I bought myself noise cancelling headphones and it has helped a lot. I've also begun noticing when sound would start to affect me and remove myself from the situation before I get bad anxiety problems.
I used to think my anxiety was sometimes random.
So yea. Sure. Probably Neurodivergent.
I don't know. I say probably because I feel like I'm lying to myself.
I'm wondering how other undiagnosed people feel about their situation.
I haven't been officially diagnosed so I go with the neurodivergent label, but I have also discovered this as an adult because of course the standard way it's covered in the media is so different I would've never thought to relate to being on the spectrum or having ADHD. This realization was a big one, it caused a bit of an identity crisis for a while during a not-so-ideal time in my life. There were so many things I considered to be a preference that happened to fit in with being neurodiverse. Being very annoyed by loud noises and people? That was sensory overload. Being anxious about talking to people and rehearsing scripts in my head so it would turn out fine? Also something people on the spectrum do. Group conversations hard to follow? Same thing. Having obsessive interests where I spent way more time on it compared to anyone else I knew did on their hobbies? That was called having a special interest. Preferring to be direct when talking to people instead of saying something else and expecting them to interpret what's said between the lines? That's also what being on the spectrum is. Not adhering to gendered norms? That was just me not understanding the neurotypical social world. Turns out not every teen reads books on body language for fun. I think my interest in reading and consuming fictional media was me trying to understand how others 'normally' worked and emulating it. Hell, I still do it, it's just more conscious than unconscious now.
I have no way to get diagnosed where I am and it's a bit confusing navigating this on my own since I suspect I also have alexithymia (a condition where you have trouble recognizing, expressing, and describing your own emotions). But I read up on it to understand myself more and also read through the experiences of others (much more helpful than some research studies - there's a shocking amount of discrimination in them, which knowing how medical research has treated women and minorities is also not shocking). It's been a bit of a journey and it's an ongoing one but knowing that I am neurodiverse has given me an understanding in my life that I didn't have before and honestly, I'm more confident in myself. I can make accommodations to make myself more comfortable, like wearing earbuds anywhere it's too loud or wearing clothing that won't feel wrong on my skin. If things do go wrong or if I mess up in situations, I just go easy on myself. Even when I do mask, I know I'm doing it and know why so it doesn't feel wrong to have to 'put on an act'.
I hope this is also a positive journey of self-discovery for you that also helps you feel more comfortable with yourself.
Both of you might want to check out Unmasking Autism by Devon Price. There may be parts of it (possibly big parts) that you don't find relevant to your own situation, but then again you may be surprised. Word of warning, though: it's very opinionated and very political, which can be turn-offs for some people.
I've seen it recommended a lot and I read a bit of it before dropping off. I might pick it up again sometime and finish it but when I tried reading it, it was another resource from an American perspective and I didn't have the energy to make the effort to try to decipher it and translate what it might mean from my cultural perspective. I have nothing against the book, it does seem to be insightful and I'll probably find plenty to relate to in it, it just was another thing that I was not the direct target audience for at the time so I wasn't motivated to read it all the way through. But thank you for the recommendation still, I appreciate it.
Diagnosed as a child and medicated through school. Let special authorities lapse on the transition from child health to adult psychiatry.
Failed two attempts at engineering degrees (to broad) and completed a more narrowly scoped BSc in computer science.
Now in mid thirties I am doing ok mostly just floating on.
My adhd really presents itself when trying to do anything non-technical. Not only is it a generally foreign concept, but the independence development plan (goal setting) at work is a massive pain in the arse to even want to do.
Finally got around to booking a GP to try and start getting medicated again. At least to see what difference it makes.
After 5 years, I decided to switch from Vyvanse back to Adderall because:
• Vyvanse gave me a shorter temper. Not enough to cause problems in everyday life, but noticable.
• Possible sleeping issues. Getting more than 6.5 hours is very very difficult.
After about 9 days back on Adderall, I can say that Adderall has definitely helped with my temperament, but absolutely destroyed my ability to sleep. My RLS has gotten worse, and I haven't gotten more than 4 hours of consecutive sleep without 20mg worth of edibles. I'm hoping everything will right itself in the next 4-5 days, otherwise I don't know what I'll do.
I'm narcoleptic (clinically diagnosed type-2). I've been unable to get the stimulants I need to function for several months now. Sleep attacks are very frequent. At the same time, there's a lot going on in my personal life that I don't have the energy to address. It makes my already low mood much worse. I'm struggling to survive.