18 votes

New job quandary

So for the past two years, I've been a residential Cable Technician working for a subcontractor for Cox (Comcast). After many applications, I finally landed a position. I'd been trying to get a foothold into IT for a while now; my A+ is nearly expired at this point. I was pretty stoked to actually get the position. The position is a "Level 1 IT Specialist" at a private school. Utilizing company software to respond to tickets, fix issues for admin staff and teachers/students. The only hitch at first was that I had to shave clean (Silly, I know). Begrudgingly, I relented. That's fine, it's not particularly impressive anyway.

Today, I got a call from the HR rep who did my onboarding saying that I would also unfortunately need to cut my hair to follow their guidelines of hairline above the collar. This is a huge deal for me, as my hairline is currently at the middle of my back. I just wear it up for work. This would truly devastate me. The people interviewing me (3 of them) said it would be fine, then the employee handbook stated otherwise. When asked, the HR rep said she'd contact a supervisor, supe said no, and now she's referring me to another department (Benefits? Dunno how that's relevant) to try to make an exception or something to that effect.

Beyond just wanting to lament the likely loss of 4 years of work, I did want to ask those who are more experienced in the IT field than myself: Is this job (the IT one) one that will absolutely help me progress in my IT career? I know I didn't give the most detailed explanation of it; I hardly know everything myself. It was hard enough to finally have a job get back to me. And I was accepted rather quickly. But the loss of my hair gives me pause, and makes me wonder if I'm better off at my current job and waiting for another opportunity that might never come. Should I just grit my teeth and accept this blow to my identity for the sake of furthering my career? Any advice at all is welcome.

34 comments

  1. [5]
    patience_limited
    (edited )
    Link
    If you're interested in a technical career outside of software development, let me suggest first that you look for a bigger organization. I don't know where you're located, but public schools,...
    • Exemplary

    If you're interested in a technical career outside of software development, let me suggest first that you look for a bigger organization. I don't know where you're located, but public schools, health systems, IT services companies, and larger businesses are good targets if you know anyone on the inside who can connect you to someone who's hiring.

    A private school or small business is unlikely to have a wide enough range of experienced technical staff for you to learn from. There's also the double-edged possibility that they're so short-staffed you'll be faced with problems far beyond your training, the sink-or-swim*** model. A bigger organization also gives you more chances for internal promotion.

    At a cultural level, going from a field-work job to an office job requires a different mindset. You're going to be working among the people who make the rules, under their immediate oversight. If you go stealthily among them, looking like you belong, you won't trigger the immediate rule-enforcing immune response of the corporate blob that tries to digest or expel you.

    The fact that the school didn't choose to enforce the hair length rule before dangling the job is a measure of the organization's dishonesty. They're probing how desperate and compliant you are. This is also a classic corporate culture fit test. You're forced to choose between personal expression and the opportunities possible through compliance.

    I wish I could tell you to blow off this job and keep trying. Yet I'd be advising you poorly if I don't acknowledge you'll miss opportunities if you don't trim yourself down to "business casual" grooming and attire. Outside of the few places with worker shortages, the competition for entry-level roles is stiff enough that companies will pass on hiring anyone who doesn't look right (which is extra 💩 if you're not the right race, gender, sexuality, etc., despite the illegality). Get a few years of experience and some in-demand skills, and they'll probably hire you even if you show up barefoot and facially tattooed.

    As for the immediate job, if you're willing to cut your hair, take the job, get a year or two of experience, shop out your resume (because it's easier to get hired when you're already doing the work) and jump ship as soon as something better comes along. Get established, and grow your hair again once you're valuable enough that your manager will go to bat for you. At that point, people will know your flowing locks mean you're a great and powerful wizard.

    Let me caveat my advice by acknowledging that most of my early IT job hunting experiences were during bad economic recessions, in depressed Right-to-Work states, and I'm visibly queer. I'm rather cynical and burned-out after years of self-abuse in corporate work. YMMV.

    ***That was how I got extensive exposure to complex problems very quickly. I wouldn't recommend the solo experience for building professional-level capacity, because you'll be too busy holding things together with duct tape and prayers to learn proper management and architecture. But it does make subsequent study more meaningful.

    29 votes
    1. [3]
      Heichou
      Link Parent
      Felt like I'd update you. Just sent HR my job rejection email. To have been lied to the way I was honestly makes me sick. My hair is important to me and I'm sure there are plenty of other...

      Felt like I'd update you. Just sent HR my job rejection email. To have been lied to the way I was honestly makes me sick. My hair is important to me and I'm sure there are plenty of other positions where nobody will give a damn about my long hair. Thank you for your cynicism; it made me realize I need to value myself sometimes.

      16 votes
      1. [2]
        patience_limited
        (edited )
        Link Parent
        I'm happy you made that choice! It took me years before I could summon the courage to tell a dishonest employer where to go, and in the long run I would have been better off if I'd never...

        I'm happy you made that choice! It took me years before I could summon the courage to tell a dishonest employer where to go, and in the long run I would have been better off if I'd never compromised.

        My best wishes on your journey, and please feel to reach out at any time if I can be of help.

        7 votes
    2. Heichou
      Link Parent
      This is the plan for sure. Maybe they like me and offer a promotion to level 2 after a year or so, or maybe they don't and I take that sweet, sweet resume fuel with me elsewhere. Gonna have to...

      As for the immediate job, if you're willing to cut your hair, take the job, get a year or two of experience, shop out your resume (because it's easier to get hired when you're already doing the work) and jump ship as soon as something better comes along. Get established, and grow your hair again once you're valuable enough that your manager will go to bat for you. At that point, people will know your flowing locks mean you're a great and powerful wizard.

      This is the plan for sure. Maybe they like me and offer a promotion to level 2 after a year or so, or maybe they don't and I take that sweet, sweet resume fuel with me elsewhere. Gonna have to swallow my pride I think to get to where I want to go, much as it chagrins me. Thank you for your (indeed cynical but nonetheless valuable) advice. Love the wizard comment lol

      7 votes
  2. [4]
    first-must-burn
    Link
    Is this a private (likely Christian, likely conservative) school in the US? If so, I will note that this may be a precursor to more "type conformance" requirements. I only mention it because it...

    The position is a "Level 1 IT Specialist" at a private school

    Is this a private (likely Christian, likely conservative) school in the US? If so, I will note that this may be a precursor to more "type conformance" requirements. I only mention it because it might be worth paying a little bit of attention to the environment and expectations to make sure you're okay with them before you take the big chop.

    I'm making a lot of assumptions on little data, but the facial hair and hair length requirements sound "on brand" for these kinds of places. If I'm off base, please disregard.

    16 votes
    1. [3]
      Heichou
      Link Parent
      Yes, in the US. Dunno bout Christian but definitely conservative. Which makes me throw up in my mouth a little, but hey, a job's a job. Little late in the game to be backing out, truthfully. I can...

      Yes, in the US. Dunno bout Christian but definitely conservative. Which makes me throw up in my mouth a little, but hey, a job's a job. Little late in the game to be backing out, truthfully. I can only hope I won't be made to follow the standards as rigorously as the students

      6 votes
      1. [2]
        boxer_dogs_dance
        Link Parent
        If it is a "Christian" school, police your social media use. You likely won't be held to the same requirements as a teacher, but that group of people are judgemental and controlling. (The...

        If it is a "Christian" school, police your social media use. You likely won't be held to the same requirements as a teacher, but that group of people are judgemental and controlling. (The Christians who go out of their way to found their own schools tend to be among the most controlling. Your average Presbyterian wouldn't care about your personal life short of crime)

        9 votes
        1. Heichou
          Link Parent
          Oh I'm not worried about that. Tildes is the only social media platform I use lol. But I getcha

          Oh I'm not worried about that. Tildes is the only social media platform I use lol. But I getcha

          3 votes
  3. [14]
    DeaconBlue
    Link
    What is your goal by "IT career"? If your goal is to be a software developer, it might help slightly but not a particularly large amount. If your goal is to work your way up the systems technician...

    Is this job (the IT one) one that will absolutely help me progress in my IT career?

    What is your goal by "IT career"?

    If your goal is to be a software developer, it might help slightly but not a particularly large amount. If your goal is to work your way up the systems technician ladder then it will absolutely help.

    Cutting your hair is a frankly absurd request because there is no way that they enforce that rule for everyone in the company. However, that doesn't change the situation that you are currently in.

    For any real advice, you kind of need to provide some additional context for where you want to be. And even within that context, what are your timeliness? Are your goals 2 years out? 5? 10? If your goal is to go from your current position to your goal position as soon as possible at the expense of comfort, then this job probably makes sense. If you want to be comfortable and work your way up over the course of years then you might want to hold off.

    11 votes
    1. [13]
      Heichou
      Link Parent
      Honestly? I don't have any goals. I know I want to be in IT, and I know how incredibly vague that desire is, but I don't have the money to go to college for it. I haven't bothered narrowing it...

      Honestly? I don't have any goals. I know I want to be in IT, and I know how incredibly vague that desire is, but I don't have the money to go to college for it. I haven't bothered narrowing it down because it doesn't matter currently; I just don't have the time/money(!!!) for it. So until the time comes that I feel I have the breathing room to pursue a degree, general technical work like this is ideal for me. I felt that this position, just being a level 1 bozo learning the ins and outs, would be invaluable experience on a resume as it feels like it would open doors for me to progress to level 2/3/whatever where I can be in a position to be financially secure enough to pursue an education. From my understanding, it's not easy to get an IT job at this level without certs/degrees/experience, even though it's the lowest tier of tech. So I figured I could be spending another 2 years at my dead end technician job, or actually make progress in the grand scheme and set myself up for opportunity.

      Probably gonna just lose the hair.

      5 votes
      1. [11]
        cfabbro
        (edited )
        Link Parent
        FYI, the vast majority of people I have worked with in IT (and later in Data Recovery / Computer Forensics) have not had relevant formal degrees, and neither do I. IMO one of the best things about...

        I don't have the money to go to college for it... So until the time comes that I feel I have the breathing room to pursue a degree

        FYI, the vast majority of people I have worked with in IT (and later in Data Recovery / Computer Forensics) have not had relevant formal degrees, and neither do I. IMO one of the best things about working in IT is that job experience and certifications almost always matter more than formal degrees when it comes to getting hired. So if you let me know the type of IT career path you're most interested in, I can probably point you towards the certs you should be looking at working towards getting for yourself. And depending on your employer, they may even pay for the study material, training courses, and exams for you, if you express a desire to attain them, and they want to help you advance. Often that sort of deal will come with a contract extension though, to justify the costs for them, and so you can't just immediately quit after they help you get the certs. :P

        11 votes
        1. patience_limited
          Link Parent
          What /u/cfabbro said. I've got completely unrelated college degrees, but an A+, Network+, and a server cert got me launched on the IT track. Cisco CCNA, VMWare, and a few other things happened...

          What /u/cfabbro said. I've got completely unrelated college degrees, but an A+, Network+, and a server cert got me launched on the IT track. Cisco CCNA, VMWare, and a few other things happened along the way.

          5 votes
        2. [9]
          Heichou
          Link Parent
          I've always been a fan of the more hands-on stuff. Taking care of servers/users on servers is something I've always been interested in. I don't know if programming is much my style, but I like...

          I've always been a fan of the more hands-on stuff. Taking care of servers/users on servers is something I've always been interested in. I don't know if programming is much my style, but I like general maintenance and improvement things; keeping things up and running, upgrading when it's time, adding user accounts to servers and setting up perms and all that. That probably sounds super vague but vague is my knowledge of the umbrella of IT

          4 votes
          1. [7]
            patience_limited
            (edited )
            Link Parent
            You're starting from a good place - you sound like you understand what engages you and can get satisfaction from doing the work. There are plenty of opportunities that don't require...

            You're starting from a good place - you sound like you understand what engages you and can get satisfaction from doing the work. There are plenty of opportunities that don't require programmer-level ability to stare at a screen all day.

            As far as growing from where you are now, your local community college is your best friend - comparatively inexpensive cert courses, taught at work-friendly hours, usually by people who've had some skin in the game. My Cisco instructor was one of the best teachers I've ever had in my life, and the lab setup was top quality with state-of-the-art gear. Same deal for the structured cabling and security classes - great instructors who had substantial real-world experience.

            I took a VMWare VSphere class through one of the test prep companies (fortunately, employer-paid), and the instructor was a guy whose experience was mainly in taking cert tests. I learned what VMWare wanted me to know, but it was a long way from what I needed to know to fit the product to a production environment.

            4 votes
            1. [4]
              mxuribe
              Link Parent
              Hey @Heichou I think @patience_limited said it best here (beyond their already great, solid advice above)! Not only are local community college classes great, often not so expensive, and relevant,...

              As far as growing from where you are now, your local community college is your best friend - comparatively inexpensive cert courses, taught at work-friendly hours, usually by people who've had some skin in the game.

              Hey @Heichou I think @patience_limited said it best here (beyond their already great, solid advice above)! Not only are local community college classes great, often not so expensive, and relevant, but also instructors can be a great opportunity for networking - the people kind not the technical kind. ;-) Instructors know people who know people, so can be a good connection to getting to know others, which is good for socializing yes (and/or comiserating too), but also for getting future opportunitirs/jobs.

              4 votes
              1. [2]
                patience_limited
                Link Parent
                /u/mxuribe reminded me that my Cisco instructor provided a recommendation that was hugely important in getting a much more responsible job in a big company, with attendant pay rise. He was the...

                /u/mxuribe reminded me that my Cisco instructor provided a recommendation that was hugely important in getting a much more responsible job in a big company, with attendant pay rise. He was the source for most of the certified students in the community, so his recommendation was taken very seriously. That's incentive to be a good student - show up, pay attention, ask questions when you're uncertain, do the homework, and you might get a golden ticket.

                3 votes
                1. mxuribe
                  Link Parent
                  Totally agreed!!!

                  ...his recommendation was taken very seriously. That's incentive to be a good student - show up, pay attention, ask questions when you're uncertain, do the homework, and you might get a golden ticket...

                  Totally agreed!!!

              2. Heichou
                Link Parent
                Duly noted! Much appreciated :)

                Duly noted! Much appreciated :)

                2 votes
            2. [2]
              Heichou
              Link Parent
              I'll definitely look into some nearby community colleges and see if they're offering cert courses. Maybe talk to an advisor or something if I settle on one. Not too sure how it all works haha....

              I'll definitely look into some nearby community colleges and see if they're offering cert courses. Maybe talk to an advisor or something if I settle on one. Not too sure how it all works haha. Thank you!

              3 votes
              1. tanglisha
                Link Parent
                Don't forget to look into grants. You might be able to pay even less.

                Don't forget to look into grants. You might be able to pay even less.

                3 votes
          2. cfabbro
            (edited )
            Link Parent
            Ah, okay. In that case, it sounds like a generalized IT support or basic sysadmin position is going to be up your alley. So that private school job is actually probably going to be well suited for...

            Ah, okay. In that case, it sounds like a generalized IT support or basic sysadmin position is going to be up your alley. So that private school job is actually probably going to be well suited for you, since you will likely get to experience a broad range of IT tasks and responsibilities. But I will also wholeheartedly second the community college recommendation too, and IMO you also had a good idea about talking to an advisor there as well.

            p.s. Regarding certs, starting with a basic CompTIA A+ and Network+ or equivalent is probably for the best, since they will provide you with a decent baseline skillset and knowledge base. After that, and after you get some more hands-on experience, you can then specialize further if you want to, depending on what aspects of the job or types of equipment you find yourself drawn to and enjoying the most. But IMO there is also absolutely nothing wrong with sticking with generalized IT support / sysadmin jobs if that's what you enjoy. I did that for many years before switching over to data recovery and computer forensics.

            4 votes
      2. tanglisha
        Link Parent
        Wherever you end up, make sure you go over the benefits package carefully. Many organizations will with refund or front classes and accreditations, particularly if they directly relate to your...

        Wherever you end up, make sure you go over the benefits package carefully. Many organizations will with refund or front classes and accreditations, particularly if they directly relate to your job. Conferences, too, which can help build up your network.

        1 vote
  4. [4]
    cfabbro
    (edited )
    Link
    Is that policy not considered discriminatory, since Orthodox Judaism, Rastafarianism, and Sikhism all prohibit cutting of hair, and therefor an illegal employment policy where you live? Because...

    I would also unfortunately need to cut my hair to follow their guidelines of hairline above the collar. This is a huge deal for me, as my hairline is currently at the middle of my back.

    Is that policy not considered discriminatory, since Orthodox Judaism, Rastafarianism, and Sikhism all prohibit cutting of hair, and therefor an illegal employment policy where you live? Because I'm pretty sure it would be illegal here in Canada, unless there was a valid safety concern at that specific job, e.g. a job where long hair could potentially get caught in industrial machinery. And I can't see that being a legitimate concern for someone working as an IT person at a school.

    So depending on where you live, and how much you want to fight this, it might be worth talking to an labor/employment lawyer familiar with the discrimination laws in your region.

    As for your questions about IT careers, I have a friend that started out as a science teacher, then switched to working IT at the same public school, and has since progressed from there. He is now a regional IT manager for the public school board. So you definitely can advance in the IT career by starting at a school and working up from there, but it would probably depend a lot on the school in question. And I suspect the opportunities for advancement might be fewer and further between at a private school, unless it's part of some larger network of schools. But even then, it also gets your foot in the door, and the experience would still look good on your resume if/when you start looking for another IT job elsewhere. So ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    5 votes
    1. [3]
      Heichou
      Link Parent
      The problem is I don't want to be that guy. Going through all of that before I'm even there a year would make me feel like I've painted a big target on my back along with a note that says "Pain in...

      The problem is I don't want to be that guy. Going through all of that before I'm even there a year would make me feel like I've painted a big target on my back along with a note that says "Pain in the ass: terminate ASAP". I don't think I could reasonably convince them that I ascribe to those philosophies, as I fear it would be painfully obvious that I'm abusing the religious exemption clause (I'm white as hell, ain't no way anybody gonna believe I practice sikhism or rastafarianism). I'll probably just have to end up cutting it off :/. I knew that it was probably a foregone conclusion, but I just hope it's worth it in the long run

      5 votes
      1. cfabbro
        (edited )
        Link Parent
        Yeah, I totally understand. And that is definitely a valid concern about painting a target on your back, and potentially being seen as difficult. Hopefully someone higher up with some sense will...

        Yeah, I totally understand. And that is definitely a valid concern about painting a target on your back, and potentially being seen as difficult. Hopefully someone higher up with some sense will give you an exemption. But if they don't, whether you give in to their demands to cut your hair is a tough and very personal decision, so I don't envy your position there. :(

        But if it gives you any hope, IME as someone who has worked in corporate IT environments most of my life, those of us in the IT industry thankfully often do get exemptions when it comes to our attire and such. E.g. I and most of the other IT people I've worked with over the years have rarely ever had to wear a formal business attire. 90% of the time I've gotten away with just wearing my standard metal band t-shirts and cargo shorts or jeans, despite "business attire" being a requirement for every other employee at the company outside IT. And the same has been true for most of my fellow IT coworkers, although many did wear dress pants out of habit, and I did occasionally too, if something a little more professional looking was actually required (like a scheduled meeting with a client). But your results may vary, depending on your employer and how strict (or desperate for IT employees) they are. :P

        4 votes
      2. RheingoldRiver
        Link Parent
        Think of it as being that guy so that it's easier for the next person who would otherwise have to be that guy.

        The problem is I don't want to be that guy.

        Think of it as being that guy so that it's easier for the next person who would otherwise have to be that guy.

  5. devilized
    Link
    I started my IT career in a public school, and it was a great experience. In a small organization like that, you will likely have exposure to everything - desktop, server, network, maybe voice,...

    I started my IT career in a public school, and it was a great experience. In a small organization like that, you will likely have exposure to everything - desktop, server, network, maybe voice, etc. Our school district had 7 sites. You're usually dealing with a variety of deployments - teacher/admin computers and computer labs. And you have to outsmart students trying to abuse equipment.

    I learned a ton, and it absolutely helped me get my next job. The employers I had after that were all interested in the work I did there.

    As to whether you should cut your hair to take the job, I can't answer that for you. I understand (though disagree with) their requirements as a private school. Academia in general can be restrictive like that, and they are likely holding you to the same standards as their teachers. I had to dress up more than I would have liked, but I just dealt with it. That's different than cutting hair, though.

    4 votes
  6. [3]
    Oslypsis
    Link
    Just because this whole thing rubs me the wrong way, are you being compensated for such a sacrifice? Like did they promise at least a year at the job or a little extra pay, or at least to pay for...

    Just because this whole thing rubs me the wrong way, are you being compensated for such a sacrifice? Like did they promise at least a year at the job or a little extra pay, or at least to pay for the appointment to cut your hair? And I mean did they bring up compensation before you did? If the answers to these are all no, I personally would keep looking. It gives me the corporate version of the ick.

    2 votes
    1. [2]
      Heichou
      Link Parent
      No compensation whatsoever. Just drafted up my job decline email. Got told on two occasions that my hair was okay, and then suddenly it wasn't. I didn't grow my hair our for 4 years just because I...

      No compensation whatsoever. Just drafted up my job decline email. Got told on two occasions that my hair was okay, and then suddenly it wasn't. I didn't grow my hair our for 4 years just because I thought it would be funny. Shit's important to me. I can only hope I'll be able to find another opportunity

      7 votes
      1. Oslypsis
        Link Parent
        Good on you! Employers will learn slowly, one by one, that they don't have as much power as they think they do, as long as we keep the bar off the ground.

        Good on you! Employers will learn slowly, one by one, that they don't have as much power as they think they do, as long as we keep the bar off the ground.

        4 votes
  7. [2]
    0x29A
    Link
    Though it's up to you to decide whether personal sacrifices are worth it, especially for starting out in the industry- after moving from an employer that cared too much about dress codes and all...

    Though it's up to you to decide whether personal sacrifices are worth it, especially for starting out in the industry- after moving from an employer that cared too much about dress codes and all that (conservative Christian) to one with a much better culture (tattoos, reasonable casual dress, hair choices are fine), I would never go back. It had a significant effect on my mental and physical wellbeing to not be allowed to be comfortable. I realized how a number of requirements of that earlier employer were actually reflective of how they acted in the job itself (micromanagement, religious attendance requirements, awful policies, understaffing, lack of proper parking and other basics that employees expect).

    This current employer that doesn't care much about appearance (as long as reasonable and well kept and not extreme in any way) has a completely opposite culture (no micromanagement, great benefits, focus on employee health and safety and work/life balance, reasonable policies and amenities).

    That said I am sure I am lucky to find this rare gem of a place (large company) in the corporate world, it did show me that better company cultures are possible and at least sometimes the initial interview, pickiness, honesty, etc all will indicate how they will treat you later.

    2 votes
    1. 0x29A
      Link Parent
      On a different facet of things- I began in helpdesk (phone/email) IT support and that experience led me to desktop / in person support, and that experience eventually led me to an entry level...

      On a different facet of things-

      I began in helpdesk (phone/email) IT support and that experience led me to desktop / in person support, and that experience eventually led me to an entry level sysadmin job which I have now so I do think the experience is worth it. What was most important was demonstrating problem solving skills and determination to find an answer. It stood out.

      I do not have a relevant degree (or actually even that many certifications) but I was able to demonstrate my knowledge and experience enough in an interview via troubleshooting questions and so forth that I got hired

      2 votes
  8. l_one
    Link
    I feel like I just read about an alternate-world version of myself. I used to be in IT (for the first 10 years of my working life after college), then I spent around 3 1/2 years as a subcontractor...

    I feel like I just read about an alternate-world version of myself.

    I used to be in IT (for the first 10 years of my working life after college), then I spent around 3 1/2 years as a subcontractor residential cable tech (Charter). That's a weird enough match of background, but not to a crazy degree. But the hair. I have hair that goes down to my knees, pretty unusual for a guy.

    Hello other me...??

    1 vote