68 votes

I like that the boat is stuck

26 comments

  1. [4]
    Toric
    Link
    Hes right. This is perhaps one of the least controversial news stories in the last... I dont know how long. And its refreshing. Its even mildly amusing. The article itself is honestly a breath of...

    Hes right. This is perhaps one of the least controversial news stories in the last... I dont know how long. And its refreshing. Its even mildly amusing.

    The article itself is honestly a breath of fresh air.

    31 votes
    1. NaraVara
      Link Parent
      Somehow, Elon Musk hasn’t even chimed in with an unwanted solution. Nature truly is healing.

      Somehow, Elon Musk hasn’t even chimed in with an unwanted solution. Nature truly is healing.

      28 votes
    2. Tardigrade
      Link Parent
      I'm sure it's stressful if you're involved but to everyone I know it's been a good chuckle sending photos round groupchats.

      I'm sure it's stressful if you're involved but to everyone I know it's been a good chuckle sending photos round groupchats.

      8 votes
    3. Parliament
      Link Parent
      In terms of recent news, I noticed there was quite a bit of agreement around the GameStop situation too.

      In terms of recent news, I noticed there was quite a bit of agreement around the GameStop situation too.

      2 votes
  2. [6]
    vektor
    Link
    Nice read. Reminds me of "the front fell off" in a few ways: repetitive style, topic.

    Nice read. Reminds me of "the front fell off" in a few ways: repetitive style, topic.

    13 votes
    1. [2]
      admicos
      Link Parent
      I'm sorry but you made me imagine a parody of it but with this boat and I want that to happen so bad right now.

      I'm sorry but you made me imagine a parody of it but with this boat and I want that to happen so bad right now.

      There's only sea, birds, and fish

      And?

      A stuck boat in the Suez Canal

      15 votes
      1. ChuckS
        Link Parent
        Lol I imagined what you wrote in the style of Goodnight Moon.

        Lol I imagined what you wrote in the style of Goodnight Moon.

        In the great green room, there was a telephone, a tiny doll house, and a picture of a boat, stuck in the Suez Canal.

        6 votes
    2. [3]
      Seirdy
      Link Parent
      Is there a name for this humorous style of repetitive, cheerful, repetitive writing? Especially with regards to generally negative news (oil spills, a naval jam, etc). Another example: Discourse...

      Is there a name for this humorous style of repetitive, cheerful, repetitive writing? Especially with regards to generally negative news (oil spills, a naval jam, etc).

      Another example: Discourse on HTTPS from n-gate, one of my favorite websites. I don't entirely agree with it and it isn't as funny as "the front fell off" and doesn't have the same sort of microhumor as the OP, but it was an excellent read nonetheless.

      6 votes
      1. RNG
        Link Parent
        I don't necessarily agree with the conclusion, but that article was damn funny. The OP post was one of the funniest things I've read this year, and I do feel that article shares that same...

        I don't necessarily agree with the conclusion, but that article was damn funny. The OP post was one of the funniest things I've read this year, and I do feel that article shares that same hilarious simplistic repetitive tone.

        3 votes
  3. [2]
    Kuromantis
    (edited )
    Link
    Just to be really pedantic: And because it turned too much. Because the ship is only wider than the canal when it isn't going perpendicular to it like in all the pictures taken of the incident....

    Just to be really pedantic:

    It's stuck because it's big, bigger than the place where it is, and that's why it's stuck.

    And because it turned too much. Because the ship is only wider than the canal when it isn't going perpendicular to it like in all the pictures taken of the incident.

    But more seriously, this is possibly one of the least controversial news stories within my lifetime and definitely the least controversial I've ever read, by far.

    7 votes
    1. vektor
      Link Parent
      That’s not very typical, I’d like to make that point. Well, there are a lot of these ships going around the world all the time, and very seldom does anything like this happen … I just don’t want...

      That’s not very typical, I’d like to make that point.

      Well, there are a lot of these ships going around the world all the time, and very seldom does anything like this happen … I just don’t want people thinking that cargo ships aren’t safe.

      Because some of them are built so they don't go sideways at all.

      14 votes
  4. [3]
    Loire
    Link
    Good news! The Ever Given is free and back in the Red Sea. International commerce may resume and everr shipping compan's VP of logistics may stop sweating now.

    Good news! The Ever Given is free and back in the Red Sea. International commerce may resume and everr shipping compan's VP of logistics may stop sweating now.

    6 votes
    1. [2]
      LukeZaz
      Link Parent
      Not gonna lie, I kinda miss the boat being stuck. Feels like we've lost the good stuff this article mentioned now that the boat is no longer stuck. That, and the situation was pretty damn...

      Not gonna lie, I kinda miss the boat being stuck. Feels like we've lost the good stuff this article mentioned now that the boat is no longer stuck. That, and the situation was pretty damn ridiculous and funny all things considered.

      6 votes
      1. MonkeyPants
        Link Parent
        I like that the boat was stuck. I like that the boat is now unstuck. I like that the boat got unstuck by towing and digging, and more digging and more towing. I like that no one died from the boat...

        I like that the boat was stuck.

        I like that the boat is now unstuck.

        I like that the boat got unstuck by towing and digging, and more digging and more towing.

        I like that no one died from the boat being stuck.

        I like that no one died from the boat being unstuck.

        I like that there are no boat stuck deniers.

        I like that there are no boat stuck truthers.

        The boat was stuck. The boat is now unstuck. This is good.

        6 votes
  5. [7]
    thomcat
    Link
    I'm honestly surprised there haven't been any conspiracy theories springing up about this. Like, I can imagine the QAnon crowd taking this as "The Powers That Be had the boat beached to stutter...

    I'm honestly surprised there haven't been any conspiracy theories springing up about this. Like, I can imagine the QAnon crowd taking this as "The Powers That Be had the boat beached to stutter the world economy so world leaders can implement The Great Reset".

    4 votes
    1. [5]
      Eylrid
      Link Parent
      Oh, they are. Apparently qberts think it's all tied to Hillary Clinton, because of course: https://www.vice.com/en/article/dy8n9q/suez-canal-qanon-cargo-ship-conspiracies-are-getting-wild

      Oh, they are. Apparently qberts think it's all tied to Hillary Clinton, because of course: https://www.vice.com/en/article/dy8n9q/suez-canal-qanon-cargo-ship-conspiracies-are-getting-wild

      5 votes
      1. Adys
        Link Parent
        Can I just say: Fuck these articles. All they do is amplify the message.

        Can I just say: Fuck these articles. All they do is amplify the message.

        18 votes
      2. [2]
        thomcat
        Link Parent
        How bad is it that I can accurately predict where the conspiracy is going to go? ...oh no. I'm Q.

        How bad is it that I can accurately predict where the conspiracy is going to go?

        ...oh no.

        I'm Q.

        9 votes
        1. Thrabalen
          Link Parent
          Well then, snap your fingers and flash that ship back out of danger!

          Well then, snap your fingers and flash that ship back out of danger!

          1 vote
  6. [2]
    cmccabe
    Link
    Rather than create a new post, I'll just drop this link here: https://istheshipstillstuck.com/ EDIT: And also interesting is a link from that website to VesselFinder, where you can see a live-ish...

    Rather than create a new post, I'll just drop this link here: https://istheshipstillstuck.com/

    EDIT: And also interesting is a link from that website to VesselFinder, where you can see a live-ish map of the ship congestion that has built up on both sides of the canal.

    4 votes