mattw2121's recent activity

  1. Comment on Where will people commune in a godless America? in ~humanities

    mattw2121
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    I think you might be underestimating the number of people that would believe you. I'm religious. I also consider myself highly rational, to the point of always being considered the most level...
    • Exemplary

    If I said I had magic powers, saw a demon, got abducted by aliens or talked to a ghost, the vast majority of people would assume I was either lying or crazy.

    I think you might be underestimating the number of people that would believe you.

    People are weirdly unwilling to examine religious beliefs.

    I'm religious. I also consider myself highly rational, to the point of always being considered the most level headed, non-emotional person around. How do I fit those two things together? I purposefully put aside rationalism when it comes to my religion. I know that's a tough thing to understand, but it's the very definition of "faith" and is the bedrock of my religion (and most).

    Why am I willing to put rationalism aside? Because I believe there are a ton of things that just can't be explained unless there is some higher power (a creator). Where did all the matter come from? The Big Bang expanded it all (and it keeps expanding), but where did it come from originally?

    I totally understand (from the rational side of me) that a counter argument could be "Well, where did your creator come from?" I get it. I understand there's a hole there. Again, faith comes in, which, to me, is the putting aside of some rational thought.

    10 votes

  2. Comment on Restaurant advice Astoria, Queens, NYC in ~travel

    mattw2121
    Link
    Wanted to give an update on where we actually ate and our impressions: Dinners Seva Indian Cuisine. Really fantastic Indian food. Everything was seasoned perfectly and the spice levels were spot...

    Wanted to give an update on where we actually ate and our impressions:

    Dinners

    • Seva Indian Cuisine. Really fantastic Indian food. Everything was seasoned perfectly and the spice levels were spot on.
    • sLICe Astoria. Exactly what I'd expect a slice of pizza in NY to be. Thin, crispy crust that took a perfect fold. We got here at 10:30 (and they closed at 11) and everything was still perfect. Where I'm from you only get the stale left overs if you walk in 30 minutes before close.
    • Osteria 57. We sat in an outdoor, private booth. The service was amazing. The food was fantastic. We shared the Brussel Sprouts Salad, my wife had the Saffron Garganelli, and I had the Hudson Trout. We also had a side of the carrots. The trout was perfectly cooked and really, really good.
    • One if by Land, Two if by Sea. We sat at a window table, looking into the garden area. What a perfect setting for a great dinner. The service was exceptional. The food was fantastic. We did the Four Course Prix Fixe. Both of us had the Morels, and it was wonderfully flavored and creamy. Next, my wife had the Tuna Crudo and I had the Eggplant Napolean. Both were really good, with the Tuna Crudo being my favorite. For the main course, my wife had the Scallop Risotto and I the Beef Wellington. Both were absolutely perfect. The risotto was absolutely delicious. Dessert brought us a Lychee Pana Cotta and Piňa Colada, with both being excellent. All in all a great dinner at a really steep price.

    Breakfast/Brunch/Lunch

    • LIC Bagel on 36th Ave in Astoria. This was really just the local Mexican diner. We had texmex scrambled eggs, toast, and some bagels. All were really good with the eggs being the highlight.
    • Astoria Bagel Shop on Ditmars Blvd. Bagels were fresh out of the oven, so we went for a smear with no toasting. Really great bagels. Crispy outside, soft yet chewy on the inside.
    • The Trestle. Went here for Saturday brunch and really enjoyed the atmosphere and the food. Great service as well. I had the chocolate chip pancakes and a side of bacon. My wife had eggs, bacon, toast, and home fries. Really good bacon with a nice crunch. The pancakes were plentiful and really tasty. Good coffee. The home fries were seasoned really well and maybe the highlight of all the food.
    • Austin's Ale House. We were down in Richmond Hills and Forest Hills and stopped by this restaurant for lunch. Really glad we did. Everything was really good. Excellent service as well.
    • Chicken Fingers and Fries in the Bronx Zoo. Mentioning this here because, while expensive, they were actually really good. Much better than I anticipated Zoo Food to be.

    Bakeries
    (no vacation is complete without these!)

    • Martha's Country Bakery. We stopped by the Forest Hills location and picked up some chocolate cheesecake and strawberry shortcake. Both were out of this world good.
    • Pasticceria Rocco. Stopped in and grabbed a cheesecake and a variety of cookies. Maybe one of the best pieces of plain cheesecake I've ever had!
    • New York Bakery Café on 30th Ave in Astoria. We picked up a marbled cheesecake and a slice of birthday cake. Both were really good. My wife said it was the best "funfetti" cake she's had. Also had a few macaroons.

    The only food that we weren't happy with was a cinnamon roll at the American Museum of Natural History. Cold, stale, and no way to heat it up. It was like 7-8 dollars too.

  3. Comment on You're wrong about Aptera's car. It's ridiculously efficient (and solar powered). in ~transport

  4. Comment on Nobody warned electric vehicle owners how quickly they would burn through tires in ~transport

    mattw2121
    Link Parent
    Fair enough. My mistake on the bad data. I just checked Edmunds and it shows the Corolla without mirrors at 70.1in and Tesla Model 3 at 72.8in.

    Fair enough. My mistake on the bad data. I just checked Edmunds and it shows the Corolla without mirrors at 70.1in and Tesla Model 3 at 72.8in.

    3 votes

  5. Comment on Nobody warned electric vehicle owners how quickly they would burn through tires in ~transport

  6. Comment on Nobody warned electric vehicle owners how quickly they would burn through tires in ~transport

  7. Comment on Have my ear for a day in ~music

  8. Comment on Folks in those $100k+ jobs, corporate types, office workers... What would you say you actually do? in ~life

    mattw2121
    Link
    So, I'm in IT, but I've moved (mostly) away from the hands on day to day work and now am one of those people that are seemingly contributing nothing to society (i.e., management). :). My day is...

    So, I'm in IT, but I've moved (mostly) away from the hands on day to day work and now am one of those people that are seemingly contributing nothing to society (i.e., management). :).

    My day is definitely back to back meetings. I spend most of my day just talking to other people. A lot of this is because big corporations love making decisions by committee (because everyone is risk adverse and afraid to make a decision on their own).

    Most of these meetings I attend are a complete waste of time. I'm in the meetings to 1) make sure a completely stupid decision isn't made that will have long term impacts to my team, 2) make sure people aren't forgetting things that will have impacts to my team, and 3) make sure no one is expecting my team to do more than we have staffing for and make sure those things aren't outside our area of responsibility.

    Basically my day is spent navigating the politics, meetings, and back room deals with a goal of ensuring my team doesn't get negatively impacted by all that stuff.

    64 votes

  9. Comment on Finland has remained the happiest country in the world for the seventh year in a row, according to the annual World Happiness Report published on Wednesday in ~life

    mattw2121
    Link Parent
    I've looked into the Happiest Report a little more. Here's a key quote: Based on this, am I right to dismiss this report altogether? If I am reading this correctly, the results are solely based on...

    I've looked into the Happiest Report a little more. Here's a key quote:

    Life evaluations from the Gallup World Poll provide the basis for the annual happiness rankings. They are based on answers to the main life evaluation question. The Cantril Ladder asks respondents to think of a ladder, with the best possible life for them being a 10 and the worst possible life being a 0. They are then asked to rate their own current lives on that 0 to 10 scale. The rankings are from nationally representative samples over three years.

    Based on this, am I right to dismiss this report altogether? If I am reading this correctly, the results are solely based on individuals in the country reporting, on a scale of 0-10, their perceived happiness.

    If this is true, could things like Americans generally being more cynical drag down the score for the US? Are Finnish people more inclined to be more happy with their lot in life?

    6 votes

  10. Comment on Finland has remained the happiest country in the world for the seventh year in a row, according to the annual World Happiness Report published on Wednesday in ~life

    mattw2121
    Link
    If I'm being honest, I probably let these reports bother me more than they should. For some reason, they just never sit well with me. I thought about it a bit this morning and I believe the reason...

    If I'm being honest, I probably let these reports bother me more than they should. For some reason, they just never sit well with me. I thought about it a bit this morning and I believe the reason they don't (sit well with me) is that I don't believe they are comparing apples to apples.

    I questioned myself whether there was a comparison at all or if I was only inventing one. Specifically the comparison being countries ranked higher on the list versus the good ol' US of A. I concluded that, yes, there is a comparison. I can't count the number of times that reports like this are cited to show how great life is in some other country while, simultaneously, pointing out how it isn't so great in the US. So, whether the purpose of the report is a comparison or not (their rankings notwithstanding), I believe the effective use of the report is for comparison.

    That brought me back to why I don't like the comparison and why I don't think it is apples to apples. One of the biggest things that struck me is that every single country ranked higher than the US is smaller, with most being significantly smaller. The average population of the top 10 countries is 9 million and the mean is 5.5 million. No country ranked higher than the US has even half the population. Removing Australia, Canada, and the UK, every other country has 5% of the US population or less (most significantly less) -- Finland is 1.6% of the population as compared to the US.

    Thinking about something similar, a common theme is how much better it is to work for a small, mom and pop, employer than for a huge corporation. While that, generally, may be true, the things that a mom and pop employer do to drive up employee satisfaction just aren't possible at scale.

    I believe the same holds true for the drivers of this happiness data. It just doesn't hold up at scale. Take Finland, multiply its population (and land mass) by a factor of 60. Then, boost its racial diversity from the current 13.8% to 52.7% (matching the US). Now I think you have an entirely different story going on in Finland.

    18 votes

  11. Comment on AI IT project management in ~tech

    mattw2121
    Link Parent
    Have had good luck just using something like the following. Note, I don't copy and paste this prompt, just write something impromptu :) each time. I'm writing an email reply to a colleague and I'm...

    Have had good luck just using something like the following. Note, I don't copy and paste this prompt, just write something impromptu :) each time.

    I'm writing an email reply to a colleague and I'm afraid that the message may come across a bit harsh. Could you review my reply and rewrite it so that I don't cause any offense?

    [inert email here]

    3 votes

  12. Comment on I always knew I was different. I just didn’t know I was a sociopath. in ~health.mental

    mattw2121
    Link Parent
    I'm more interested in why people's response to each condition varies. If we believe both to be true: Depression is not a choice. People with depression can be dangerous and toxic to people close...

    I'm more interested in why people's response to each condition varies.

    If we believe both to be true:

    1. Depression is not a choice. People with depression can be dangerous and toxic to people close to them. Some people with depression are helped with therapy and can keep things under control.

    2. ASPD is not a choice. People with ASPD can be dangerous and toxic to people close to them. Some people with depression are helped with therapy and can keep things under control.

    Why does the general response to people with ASPD lean towards hatred and the general response for depression lean towards sympathy?

    4 votes

  13. Comment on I always knew I was different. I just didn’t know I was a sociopath. in ~health.mental

    mattw2121
    Link Parent
    I can promise you that I'm only discussing this in good faith and I have no ill will. I'll refrain from further discussions with you on this so if/when our paths cross again neither of us hold any...

    I can promise you that I'm only discussing this in good faith and I have no ill will.

    I'll refrain from further discussions with you on this so if/when our paths cross again neither of us hold any grudges against the other :).

    13 votes

  14. Comment on I always knew I was different. I just didn’t know I was a sociopath. in ~health.mental

    mattw2121
    Link Parent
    Thanks for your thoughts on this. What I continue to be perplexed about is that only one of these two statements is socially acceptable. My partner was a sociopath. Living with them traumatized...

    I think we're seeing in this thread a certain divide between people that may have had some experiences that hit close to home, and it can be very hard to stay impartial in those cases.

    Thanks for your thoughts on this. What I continue to be perplexed about is that only one of these two statements is socially acceptable.

    1. My partner was a sociopath. Living with them traumatized me. Every day was a living hell and I wish they'd go to hell themselves.

    2. My partner was depressed. Living with them traumatized me. Every day was a living hell and I wish they'd go to hell themselves.

    13 votes

  15. Comment on I always knew I was different. I just didn’t know I was a sociopath. in ~health.mental

    mattw2121
    Link Parent
    Agreed. But the rest of your message basically says, "I can forgive people with depression, but not people with ASPD." Sorry, for the extreme summarization, but just expressing my take away from...

    But not possessing empathy doesn't just magically remove culpability for one's actions, just like being depressed doesn't remove culpability.

    Agreed. But the rest of your message basically says, "I can forgive people with depression, but not people with ASPD."

    Sorry, for the extreme summarization, but just expressing my take away from your words.

    That's what I don't understand. You can agree that both people with depression and those with ASPD have these conditions through no fault of their own. You agree that both are culpable for their actions. Yet, you have empathy for one and not the other.

    4 votes

  16. Comment on I always knew I was different. I just didn’t know I was a sociopath. in ~health.mental

    mattw2121
    Link Parent
    100% agree with you. Pardon my ignorance, but based my understanding of depression, I thought there was not a cure for depression. My understanding is that people are taught how to manage it. If...

    100% agree with you.

    Pardon my ignorance, but based my understanding of depression, I thought there was not a cure for depression. My understanding is that people are taught how to manage it.

    If that's correct, then each disorder/disease is in the same boat.

    2 votes

  17. Comment on I always knew I was different. I just didn’t know I was a sociopath. in ~health.mental

    mattw2121
    Link Parent
    I strongly disagree that depression "mostly manifests internally". I've lived with and around people suffering from depression and it is certainly something that takes a large toll on those around...

    I strongly disagree that depression "mostly manifests internally". I've lived with and around people suffering from depression and it is certainly something that takes a large toll on those around the person suffering.

    As for ASPD not being fixable, I also disagree. Just because someone doesn't have emotions, or regret about something, doesn't toss their logic out the window. They can certainly change behavior to fit in with acceptable society. I think you might be surprised how many people living somewhere on the spectrum of ASPD are around you every day and you think they are perfectly normal and nice people.

    https://www.nhs.uk/mental-health/conditions/antisocial-personality-disorder/

    "Evidence suggests behaviour can improve over time with therapy, even if core characteristics such as lack of empathy remain. "

    10 votes

  18. Comment on I always knew I was different. I just didn’t know I was a sociopath. in ~health.mental

    mattw2121
    Link Parent
    On the flip side, couldn't we say that people with depression could be "indoctrinated" to "man it up"? I.e., not let their emotions get the better of them? I certainly was taught that.

    On the flip side, couldn't we say that people with depression could be "indoctrinated" to "man it up"? I.e., not let their emotions get the better of them? I certainly was taught that.

    3 votes

  19. Comment on I always knew I was different. I just didn’t know I was a sociopath. in ~health.mental

    mattw2121
    Link Parent
    Thank you. I appreciate your response and the even handed-ness with which you are applying things.

    Thank you. I appreciate your response and the even handed-ness with which you are applying things.

    8 votes

  20. Comment on I always knew I was different. I just didn’t know I was a sociopath. in ~health.mental

    mattw2121
    Link
    I find it interesting that the comments in this thread are so full of vitriol. I guessing the same commenters are widely supportive of the idea that people suffering from depression should be...

    I find it interesting that the comments in this thread are so full of vitriol. I guessing the same commenters are widely supportive of the idea that people suffering from depression should be treated with empathy. From my perspective, people suffering from depression can be equally dangerous and toxic to the people surrounding them.

    Why do we express empathy for people with uncontrollable emotions, and not for those lacking emotion? Neither is doing so based on their own choice.

    45 votes