26 votes

PhD Simulator

22 comments

  1. MechanicalMagpie
    Link
    I finished in 6 years 8 months with 32 hope. Anyway it took me 8 irl years to get two simultaneous associates degrees and like 12 credits towards a bachelor's and that's why i work a dead end job...

    I finished in 6 years 8 months with 32 hope.

    Anyway it took me 8 irl years to get two simultaneous associates degrees and like 12 credits towards a bachelor's and that's why i work a dead end job with no chance of a promotion ever 👍

    fun game tho

    10 votes
  2. [5]
    DefinitelyNotAFae
    Link
    Reasons I have no interest in my PhD #1-100 My Masters degree is considered a terminal degree, I'm doing the work I enjoy, and if anyone in higher ed doesn't respect me for not doing the doctorate...

    Reasons I have no interest in my PhD #1-100

    My Masters degree is considered a terminal degree, I'm doing the work I enjoy, and if anyone in higher ed doesn't respect me for not doing the doctorate that's on them.

    The game was... "Fun" if realistically frustrating

    9 votes
    1. [4]
      smiles134
      Link Parent
      My masters is also technically a terminal degree, but I've been unable to get interviews for anything other than adjunct positions while PhDs become more prevalent in my field. Debating going...

      My masters is also technically a terminal degree, but I've been unable to get interviews for anything other than adjunct positions while PhDs become more prevalent in my field. Debating going back... but probably won't.

      4 votes
      1. [3]
        DefinitelyNotAFae
        Link Parent
        I don't teach, other than RAs, as I'm in Student Affairs. But I've had times when everyone in my dept seems to be in a PhD program. And I had someone persist in asking why I didn't want to be in...

        I don't teach, other than RAs, as I'm in Student Affairs. But I've had times when everyone in my dept seems to be in a PhD program. And I had someone persist in asking why I didn't want to be in one. Learning sounds fun, dissertations and papers and such does not.

        2 votes
        1. [2]
          Notcoffeetable
          Link Parent
          One of the biggest icks I got was over dinner at my advisor's house with a renowned researcher and his daughter's PhD being called "terminal" in a disparaging way because she hadn't continued into...

          One of the biggest icks I got was over dinner at my advisor's house with a renowned researcher and his daughter's PhD being called "terminal" in a disparaging way because she hadn't continued into an academic position. It planted a seed of "I don't want to have to prove myself to these types of people my whole life."

          High level research can be such a toxic environment. The only person who ever talked about mental health to us was the IT guy on day 1. Giving us a stark warning of the signs, damage he'd seen, and offer to always have an open door for any of us that needed to talk.

          7 votes
          1. Tmbreen
            Link Parent
            That sounds like a class act IT guy. Normally I hear the horror stories of working tech in colleges but it really seemed like he cared about the people he works with.

            That sounds like a class act IT guy. Normally I hear the horror stories of working tech in colleges but it really seemed like he cared about the people he works with.

            6 votes
  3. [2]
    first-must-burn
    Link
    Not even clicking because it took me 9 years and three months to finish my PhD IRL. The tag line when I was growing up was "Be cool, stay in school." But that is definitely not what they meant....

    Not even clicking because it took me 9 years and three months to finish my PhD IRL. The tag line when I was growing up was "Be cool, stay in school." But that is definitely not what they meant.

    Referencing @DefinitelyNotAFae 's comment, I'm fond of saying, "They call it a terminal degree because getting another one might kill me."

    9 votes
    1. DefinitelyNotAFae
      Link Parent
      Ha! And this'll teach everyone. My MA is terminal (and anything that wasn't a degree in folklore might kill me indeed) and no one can make me go back!

      Ha! And this'll teach everyone. My MA is terminal (and anything that wasn't a degree in folklore might kill me indeed) and no one can make me go back!

      1 vote
  4. [6]
    chocobean
    Link
    Yay I "graduated" in 5 years 11 months with 98 hope! But my biggest regret is that I never got to see any of the conference cities.

    Yay I "graduated" in 5 years 11 months with 98 hope! But my biggest regret is that I never got to see any of the conference cities.

    4 votes
    1. [4]
      Eji1700
      Link Parent
      Interesting. I got done in 5 years 7(or 8?) months, but with 14 hope. I also literally never slacked off, so I do think I got some lucky rolls.

      Interesting. I got done in 5 years 7(or 8?) months, but with 14 hope. I also literally never slacked off, so I do think I got some lucky rolls.

      3 votes
      1. chocobean
        Link Parent
        Oh wow. June and Dec were dedicated slack off months. In the last two or three years the advisor seemed very unhappy about it but oh well. If the mini sim had included a "savings left until...

        Oh wow. June and Dec were dedicated slack off months. In the last two or three years the advisor seemed very unhappy about it but oh well.

        If the mini sim had included a "savings left until starvation" factor I would have 100% dropped out

        2 votes
      2. [2]
        Arthur
        Link Parent
        5 years and 1 month for me on my first try. I finished with 99 hope. I also never slacked off, so I'm not sure how that works. I also got to see one conference city. (And invested in a failed...

        5 years and 1 month for me on my first try. I finished with 99 hope. I also never slacked off, so I'm not sure how that works. I also got to see one conference city. (And invested in a failed crypto currency).

        2 votes
        1. Plik
          Link Parent
          I think the various failure modes are random, so different players will waste different amounts of time.

          I think the various failure modes are random, so different players will waste different amounts of time.

    2. Plik
      Link Parent
      I did the same but with...20 hope 🤣. Definitely reconfirmed my decision not to do a PhD (or second masters as some friends have suggested after getting their first).

      I did the same but with...20 hope 🤣. Definitely reconfirmed my decision not to do a PhD (or second masters as some friends have suggested after getting their first).

      1 vote
  5. Notcoffeetable
    Link
    An interesting little sim. Took 4 tries to "beat" it. Much like real life a bit of RNG helps quite a bit. The "Slack off" mechanic was honestly my favorite touch. It feels so bad in real life but...

    An interesting little sim. Took 4 tries to "beat" it. Much like real life a bit of RNG helps quite a bit.

    The "Slack off" mechanic was honestly my favorite touch. It feels so bad in real life but it's quite critical to take the time to maintain energy and motivation.

    2 votes
  6. rosco
    Link
    Lol, I got it on the first go but it took 6 years and 8 months. Thanks for posting this, and the timing was very apt. I went to my friends defense just yesterday and finally got to learn the the...

    Lol, I got it on the first go but it took 6 years and 8 months.

    Thanks for posting this, and the timing was very apt. I went to my friends defense just yesterday and finally got to learn the the outcome from his 8 years of PhD + 4 years of independent researcher work. It's wild to me how much work, time, and expertise goes into a PhD and how broad of applications you're expected to learn. But for me as a layman, the final results we an absolute treat to see and I even got a little shout out for our morning swims. But jesus, the whole process seems broken.

    Also the fact that if you quit from a job after 4 years, that is seen as amazing experience and if you quit a PhD after 4 years that is seen as a failure is just unreasonably dumb.

    2 votes
  7. [3]
    NoblePath
    Link
    Now do the humanities.

    Now do the humanities.

    2 votes
    1. [2]
      Notcoffeetable
      Link Parent
      How would it be substantially different? Honest question.

      How would it be substantially different? Honest question.

      1. NoblePath
        Link Parent
        I don’t know, that’s why I want the simulation!

        I don’t know, that’s why I want the simulation!

        3 votes
  8. zipf_slaw
    Link
    Got my PhD in 6y9m (and got the doctorate in the game-within-a-game too)! Man, the computers and lab equipment I was working with were very unreliable.

    Got my PhD in 6y9m (and got the doctorate in the game-within-a-game too)!

    Man, the computers and lab equipment I was working with were very unreliable.

    1 vote
  9. krellor
    Link
    This is too real and I'm losing hope and I'm done with grad school, wth?

    This is too real and I'm losing hope and I'm done with grad school, wth?

    1 vote
  10. Tardigrade
    Link
    Things like this and the thread as a whole highlight the difference between a PhD in different places. In the UK there's a hard cap of 4 years at most universities. It's often centrally organised...

    Things like this and the thread as a whole highlight the difference between a PhD in different places. In the UK there's a hard cap of 4 years at most universities. It's often centrally organised as well as your supervisors and sure they still have their own little fifedoms but they can't hold back your progress unless they can justify to others why.

    1 vote