Help me enjoy Baldur's Gate 3

I enjoy it, but I still haven’t finished the game! I think you sound like you are getting stuck in the perfectionist streak. You can play the game however you want really, but I guess getting all the companions is quite important.
If I were you I would roll into one of three ways of playing:

1. The perfectionist reloader- try lots of different branch options and see which one gives a good option at the end that you are happy with
2. Commit to just making a decision with the knowledge that by not trying to find the ‘best way’ to play you maintain a good level of replayability for years to come
3. Commit to a character type and make decisions that fit that persons character. I haven’t done this as much as I would like but it is my plan for my next play through!

I've been playing BG3 since early access and have a few hundred hours in it so far. I love the atmosphere, story, music, and all the rest too. One playthorough was co-op, and I have another much slower co-op game where we play about 1-2 hours a week because that's just when we have time to play, and a couple of singleplayer ones in there too.

But this time I felt constantly stressed about getting the "right" outcome, picking the "right" dialogue, getting the "right build....

The game is, for the most part, extremely forgiving when it comes to choices in dialogue. With maybe two exceptions, it will be incredibly obvious what the "bad" option is. Otherwise, let yourself be surprised. Unless you completely and utterly screw it up, it will be alright in the end. And if you do, well isn't that an interesting story you've just told. And if you really don't like it, just reload.

On that last point, save scumming is ok. I tend to roll with the punches and go with whatever happens, but ultimately it's a singleplayer game. Nobody will judge you except yourself, so any pain experienced is self-inflicted. Save (F5 to quick save) before every fight, save before dialogues that feels like they're important, and use those saves if you feel terrible about what happened. I'd say don't lean on them like a crutch, but they're a safety net.

As for your build, again the game is reasonably forgiving. Like in normal D&D some classes have different power curves, and party composition definitely matters. Have a front-liner or two, some who can heal is great, and someone with range.

If you've met a certain skeletal someone (which can be as early as the first few hours of the game), you can change any character's class and points around at any time for such a low cost. If you haven't met them, have a poke around under the chapel near the start.there are a couple of secret doors.

Like the characters but not the way they play? Just change them. In fact some of the origin characters are funny when you change them to something other than their original class.

So I am asking--how to you play this game to maximize your enjoyment?

I love exploring. Poking my head into every corner, and seeing what's there. If there's a point on the map where my characters haven't set foot, I will walk to it and see what's there. If there's a fight, I'll do a little bit of prep in terms of positioning, then initiate the fight on my terms.

Also the game seems to be pushing you not to advance time with long rests, but that's actually a trap. Your, uh, condition only advances at predefined points in the story and usually with an explicit choice in dialogue. My general philosophy is to do a short rest after every fight, and a long rest whenever I'm out of short rests or spell slots, whichever comes first. There is plenty of food if you're looting most containers, so you don't need to worry about that.

How much did you rely on wikis or our guides?

On my first playthrough, not at all. I did not want to know what was coming. I wanted to be surprised, to get things wrong, and to try and make right if I messed it up.

On later playthroughs, I now know the world, the characters, the stories, and basically everything I need to know. I'll check the wiki for specific details, but I don't use any guide materials as I am now my own guide.

Are there mods out that you recommend?

Honestly, there isn't much that I'd consider necessary to have a good time. The game is pretty good on its own. Is there anything in particular you're looking for?

What attitude so you bring when playing that makes the game enjoyable for you?

I'm here to be taken on a ride. If something happens that changes the direction, then well I guess we're going that way now.

Help me love this game, I really want to!

I want you to too. BG3 is such a special game made with lots of love and I cried at the end not because it's a teary ending, but because damn I'm so glad I live in a time when games like this exist.

One final offer, timezone shenanigans dependent, but I can offer my services as a co-op partner. I can bring advice and try my best to answer questions without spoiling any future story beats. If we do play together, it will still be your playthrough, I'll follow your lead. This is something I've done before for someone else already, and if it would interest you, flick me a DM on Tildes. Otherwise also happy to answer questions here too.

I find with RPGs, trying to min/max to the right outcome with the most content and having wikis/guides too available drains the fun from them. And that's my fault for how I'm approaching it, so here's how I'll come at RPGs with a different angle.

1. Embrace failure and roll with the consequences. I find leaning into the roleplay part helps me lean out of the game part where I want to min/max interactions. You don't ask your DM if you can save scum or reroll after all. I'll even go so far as picking the clearly worse option if that's the choice my character would make.

2. Explore. If you hit a safe area like a town and see a dark region in the area you passed, talk to the locals to see if they have a quest then go on back and look around. Larian links their acts to the big map you're on, generally you'll have a good idea if the plot is going to take you away.

3. Drop the guides and wikis, put away the phone and turn off the second monitor, wherever you're looking at them. It is easy to fall into a pattern of following them instead of playing for yourself. If you find yourself stuck or wanting more info before proceeding, go do something else and come back later. If the stuck point is still rattling your brain after your play session, then look it up. This kinda emulates the sense of playing a game at the same time as your friends, talking about it, then going back and playing.

These are my more general RPG and Larian game tips, I haven't got much specific to starting BG3 again. As for mods, I'll peruse some of the most popular/downloaded to see if there are any nice quality of life ones or see if there exists a QoL add on for some gripe I've got, but I was happy with the vanilla BG3 experience (before I too fell off and failed to finish).

Happy questing :)

I played through the whole game with a friend, and we decided, above everything else, to focus on roleplaying. We didn't choose the dialogue we thought was "right," rather what we thought our characters would say/do in the moment. We minimized save scumming: if we got a bad roll or faced an undesirable consequence, we just had to live with it and play on. We ended up missing some big stuff (including a couple of companions like yourself). Still, I was in no way disappointed by what we "missed" and what we did "wrong." What's great about the game is that you can have a fairly unique experience through the choices you make. We missed out on stuff, had far from optimal builds, struggled with some bosses, made choices that we regretted. And all of that was a ton of fun. So, to sum up my advice simply: just keep playing. Let go of optimal builds and "right" outcomes. Your "mistakes" are actually what makes the game fun and original.

BG3 is an RPG, and it's a CRPG in the classic meaning of the word. You are playing a role, just like if you were roleplaying in the pen and paper version of dungeons and dragons.

As such, there are literally thousands of ways the game can progress, just like there are in real life. As such, there will always be content on a given playthrough that you will never see.

There will always be outcomes based on decisions you made that are unexpected. That doesn't mean you made the wrong decision, or you need to restart the game.

Restarting the game and making a different decision based on outside knowledge you now have sort of goes against the spirit of the genre. In a pen and paper RPG, it would be considered metagaming, and the DM would most likely forbid it, because the whole point is to make choices that you then see the outcomes of, and you live with those choices.

I'd encourage you to just choose the type of character you want to be, and make choices that you think that character would make, and just live with them. Don't look up "optimal" choices, or try to min max the game, because doing that just exposed the gamey mechanical parts and ruins some of the magic behind why roleplaying games are interesting in the first place.

So in summary, just chill out, make your decisions boldly, and live with the consequences.