There's something to be said about exploiting others for social media (eg, children who can't consent to being filmed or don't understand that parents are incentivizing them to act a certain way...
Exemplary
There's something to be said about exploiting others for social media (eg, children who can't consent to being filmed or don't understand that parents are incentivizing them to act a certain way for likes).
But I've always been averse to the kind of gatekeeping that is implied with "stop filming and enjoy the moment." Who makes you the authority for how people enjoy their moments? The "you" not being OP directly, but aimed at people who dictate that someone filming an event or moment means they're not enjoying it properly.
If someone wants to take issue with using minors (or adults who haven't agreed to be posted on social media) for personal gain, it's a logical point to argue that has merits grounded in how we understand consent, notwithstanding laws about filming on public property.
But criticizing someone because they don't "enjoy the moment" in the same way that you think they should is just hollow. It's the same "technology is ruining the new generation!" drum that's been beaten since the printing press, probably before that as well. They don't come from a well-meaning place nor do they generate constructive discussion.
This is just another reframing of same old argument: "this damn generation is ruining everything! People sure were better back in my day!"
I unfortunately don't have time to source my argument but there's plenty of easily accessible research to be found backing up my opinion. Arguments about gatekeeping who is allowed to criticize...
I unfortunately don't have time to source my argument but there's plenty of easily accessible research to be found backing up my opinion.
They don't come from a well-meaning place nor do they generate constructive discussion.
Arguments about gatekeeping who is allowed to criticize cell phone and social media use aside, there is tons of research out there that shows that cell phones and social media are uniquely harmful and the arguments against them are not simply a rehash of that same old argument about kids these days
recording events actually impairs our memories of those events
apps are constructed so that sharing things trigger dopamine spikes, completely unlike past generations critiques of television, radio, the printing press
smartphones and social media can be addictive in the clinical sense because of their inherent design
smartphone and social media can lead to psychiatric disorders of various types
and not backed up by science but I think easily discussed:
standing in an audience watching something like a concert or fireworks show when all you can see is everyone's phone screens and not much of the actual event can objectively ruin it for people trying to live in the moment and not hold a several inches large screen above their head
more than 90% of people really do not care about your video of fireworks or concerts, so it brings up the question of why do people even do this? Likes do trigger dopamine hits...
it always baffles me when people take photos of art in museums or things like fire works or live performances. There is almost undoubtedly a much better quality version of what you captured that can easily be googled. What's wrong with advocating that people just take a break from their phones and live in the real world for a bit
At the end of the day it comes down to moderation. A quick clip or photo for posterity is certainly okay. I always allow myself to take something like a 30-second video clip of a concert before I commit to putting my phone away. But too many people these days do not have moderate connections to the device in their pocket that objectively is harming large swaths of society mentally, socially, politically, etc.
I personally believe there is a lot of constructive discussion to be had where smart phones and living in the moment is concerned
I think you make some strong points and I totally agree with the scientific aspects, although you have overextended your points on some of the discussion topics in my opinion I have never been...
I think you make some strong points and I totally agree with the scientific aspects, although you have overextended your points on some of the discussion topics in my opinion
I have never been distracted at a concert or fireworks show by the people around me holding their phones up. In fact, I rarely pay attention to others while I'm at a large event like those, so this point is actually incredibly subjective. I don't tend to record things at concerts either, except for when artists play one of my favorite songs and I do end up watching those again myself. Sure, there are recordings on youtube (many thousands), but the one I recorded myself will always take me back to that moment and remind me of the experience. Something that simply "living in the moment" is unable to do. (As an aside, I imagine the people advocating against holding a phone in the air now, would have undoubtedly had issue with people holding lighters up in the air a few decades ago)
I record stuff for myself most of the time, and even when I'm not recording for just me, I might still snap a video to send to a friend that also really enjoys that artist but was not able to attend. 90% of the general population might not care about my video or pictures, but 90% of my friend group do
Again, I think you're missing the significance of reviewing something you captured yourself, versus that which you find online. Sure, there will likely be higher quality versions available, but the imperfections in your personal media will always take you back to that moment to a great extent than anything you would find online. You took that photo/video yourself with your camera in your hand, and if you're taking it on an iphone with Live Photos you will also get a short video/audio clip from it that will further help you relive that moment
To your first point, it's mostly been my experience that the people who are most distracted at public events are the ones who are hyper focused and upset that people are on their phones. It's...
To your first point, it's mostly been my experience that the people who are most distracted at public events are the ones who are hyper focused and upset that people are on their phones. It's like, instead of just enjoying the moment, you are spending it judging how everyone else is experiencing it. My wife, for instance, has a terrible memory and recording things she attends is how she remembers them years later.
I don't know what hyper focused means in this context, but I was distracted and mildly irritated when I watched an Alessandro Cortini show with projections in an otherwise dark room and the guy...
I don't know what hyper focused means in this context, but I was distracted and mildly irritated when I watched an Alessandro Cortini show with projections in an otherwise dark room and the guy sitting in front of me regularly pulled out his phone, held it over his head with the screen facing me with full brightness as he took pictures or video clips of the show.
I didn't give the slightest damn how his experience was; for all I care he could be closing his eyes and holding his ears while recording it, so long as he did it discreetly. My irritation concerned the disturbance it caused me.
Not that I indicated in my last comment, but internally I distinguish between someone obviously obstructing and/or interfering with my experience and someone just experiencing something...
Not that I indicated in my last comment, but internally I distinguish between someone obviously obstructing and/or interfering with my experience and someone just experiencing something differently in proximity to me. That's an important distinction. So hyper focus is the people who can't just enjoy anything if someone else is "Doing it wrong."
There are actually some fantastic studies out there on the exact experience being described by the author. For example, in a study titled "media usage diminishes memory for experiences", the...
There are actually some fantastic studies out there on the exact experience being described by the author. For example, in a study titled "media usage diminishes memory for experiences", the researchers found that the very act of recording an experience seems to prevent people from 'fully experiencing' the moment - when tested in a variety of ways about the experience individuals who recorded it for their own use or for sharing all tested lower on scores of memory than people who directly experienced the event and were instructed not to record it. Of note, the times at which memory was tested were both immediately after and only one week post, and the responses might vary if they were to collect/test memory again at a later point in time, notably because those who record it could then review/relive the experience in a more robust way than purely through their own memories, but I would caution against jumping to any conclusions.
I think it's perfectly reasonable to take small snippets or recordings of an experience as a means to both ensure that you are staying in the moment as much as possible but also to aid as a trigger for those memories if you wish to relive them in the future in a more concrete way than just remembering.
I strongly agree here. I really regret not having my life before like digital cameras documented at all except a few old photos. Those memories without pictures fade with time while the photos...
I strongly agree here. I really regret not having my life before like digital cameras documented at all except a few old photos. Those memories without pictures fade with time while the photos reinforce moments in my memory when I see them. Sure, major moments you remember, but I also want to remember slices ofy life that aren't strong enough to never forget.
I have learned not to take pictures of things, other people will take better photos of those things. I take pictures of the people in my life enjoying something, nobody else is going to capture that for me at all if I don't do it, so I do.
Completely with you on this. I don’t regret for a second having recorded or taken photos of experiences I’ve had, as it means I and interested friends and family can look back on those moments so...
Completely with you on this. I don’t regret for a second having recorded or taken photos of experiences I’ve had, as it means I and interested friends and family can look back on those moments so much better. Many of them would be forgotten entirely otherwise.
This goes double for photos and videos taken by my best friend. He passed away years ago, and those files are incredibly important to me now. I can hear his voice and see his face again where I otherwise never could.
It frustrates me so much to see articles like this. People assuming I can’t enjoy something and record it at the same time. People who have decided that, because they don’t value the recording, that it has no value at all (or is even harming me somehow—what??). It’s so much pointless judging, all because they don’t understand.
Freya India's essay posits that people have forgotten how to live in the moment and trade actually experiencing for documenting via their phones. Whether a fireworks show in Paris or a packed...
Freya India's essay posits that people have forgotten how to live in the moment and trade actually experiencing for documenting via their phones. Whether a fireworks show in Paris or a packed concert, it is sure to be ubiquitously filled with people standing there watching everything happen through their camera lens. The new existential question seems to be, "If it isn't on social media, did it even happen?" while the true question should be more akin to, "If you aren't giving something your actual authentic attention, were you even there?"
I like to snap a quick photo of someone's reaction and go back to enjoying the event. A shot of a kid's awe struck face is infinitely better than twenty minutes of video of fireworks going off....
I like to snap a quick photo of someone's reaction and go back to enjoying the event. A shot of a kid's awe struck face is infinitely better than twenty minutes of video of fireworks going off.
Then again, I only shoot for family who can't be there and rarely, and I mean years in between posts, post anything on social media.
Of course, even that doesn't stop me from watching too much for reactions and getting caught up.
I sometimes feel that the moments not captured on film tend to be even more special. Cameras cannot capture what it's like to be somewhere, no matter how good they are or how skilled the...
I sometimes feel that the moments not captured on film tend to be even more special.
Cameras cannot capture what it's like to be somewhere, no matter how good they are or how skilled the photographer is. Seeing something in real life, with all the nuance and context that goes along with that is infinitly richer than looking at a photo or video of something.
I've noticed that when something incredible or interesting or funny happens, and I tell the story of my experience of it to my friends and family, they're much more engaged and feel much closer to what I felt being there versus if I had taken a photo or video of it, which would inevitably lead to me saying "oh actually I have picture of it", showing it, then them going "oh cool".
Even me looking at that photo can sometimes diminish the memory of the event itself. Positive memories aren't so much about the visual aspect of the experience, but rather how the experience made you feel, and a camera can never capture that.
My problem with this is when you get caught in an infinite scroll of all your photos looking for the specific event you’re talking about. It’s an awkward pause as I’m now distracted, frantically...
My problem with this is when you get caught in an infinite scroll of all your photos looking for the specific event you’re talking about.
It’s an awkward pause as I’m now distracted, frantically going through a variety of photos (my girlfriend will stop at a few random photos along the way and make pit stop in conversation…sometimes losing the original search in the process), and I usually fumble trying to keep the conversation flowing to fill the void.
Sometimes I eventually find the perfect pic to showcase what I was describing, but many times I give up the search and tell the other person “I’ll have to show you later.” There is no later, and I think the story would have been better suited to just have maintained eye contact and relied on my description before getting hopes up.
It’s this image search, eyes glued to my phone while talking to someone in real life that also seems to pull you out of the moment. Doesn’t even have to be a photo I’ve taken, sometimes it’s a google search that I just can’t find the right query terms to relocate a specific meme. It’s frustrating, but it makes me wonder if there will soon be AI assistants to perform this tedious task and free my attention to continue engaging in meat space.
My view is that sometimes you don't even need to do the search. Even if the search was always accessible to you within a second, a lot of the time it's just better to tell the story, describe what...
My view is that sometimes you don't even need to do the search. Even if the search was always accessible to you within a second, a lot of the time it's just better to tell the story, describe what you felt like being there, and leave it at that. If you describe it well, people's imaginations will do a much better job of emulating the feelings you felt than if you showed a perfectly framed photo.
Smartphones and social media have done things to humanity, to our societies, that I doubt anyone expected. We thought connecting the world would bring us closer together; instead it just...
Exemplary
"Memories fade Lenny. They're designed that way for a reason."
Strange Days, script by James Cameron and Jay Cocks
Smartphones and social media have done things to humanity, to our societies, that I doubt anyone expected. We thought connecting the world would bring us closer together; instead it just accelerates the divisions. And some thought having a highly capable multimedia recording communications device in everyone's pocket would accelerate the Information Age.
Well, that part it did. Because people are so determined to record they forget everything else. And a lot of folks, as the article mentions, have crafted their entire identities around recording. You see it sometimes in discussion threads, where people demand pics or it didn't happen. People can't tell their friends and family what happened, they have to bring everything to a halt just for a picture or video.
Then they'll bring it all down to zero momentum again with "hold on I took a pic ... wait .... almost ... where did I put it .... hmmm ... seriously I took a pic" while they ignore everyone and scroll frantically through their mountain of "memories."
Look, people are obviously going to live their lives however they want. We have going on two generations now that feel their lives are best lived online. With everyone else planted firmly in their hip pocket. What's the first thing that happens these days, when "Something Happens?" Everyone whips a phone out, starts recording (vertically, of course, because why wouldn't they record in the wrong ratio?)
Sometimes that's a good thing, and sometimes it's for a good reason. But a lot of the time, they're recording just out of habit. Or worse, because they hope "it'll go viral." Which is one of the big issues, one of the big problems.
Everyone wants fame. Mostly because most people think fame connects to wealth (or power), and they want that. So if Something Happens, they feel they can cash in if only they get their phone out and record. Now if we're talking news, sure, there's a valid case to be made. A bunch of shit with government, for example, is starting to maybe kinda slowly start moving toward change thanks to everyone whipping out and tapping record.
But people do it for inane shit. They do it to make fun of people. They do it to try to capitalize on eccentricity. They do it just because something strange was passing by.
This, from the same generation that insists consent is king. Yet if someone's weird or strange according to their definition, and they're out and about, that's consent enough to film and post them for all eternity.
I get, and even agree on the technical definition, that being in public means you have no privacy. But those arguments start to turn churlish, childish, and selfish, when the people screeching in favor of them are recording someone who just happened to dress odd, or talk strange, or something else like that.
Not someone who Did Something, especially when it wasn't anything illegal or aggressive; just someone who had the nerve to have one of those moments we all have from time to time, or who didn't care to perfectly coif before heading out the door. Someone who just didn't fit in.
I was at a concert in 2022. After the vaccines were out. It was an outdoors stadium show, but I wore my mask. I was just about the only person who did. After the first band was done, a guy in a seat next to me wanted to take a snap with me. And got angry when I declined to pose with him.
I knew what he wanted; he was going to post our selfie and caption something like "Look at this idiot who wore a mask to a concert. Didn't he get the memo? COVID's over!" Except he probably would have misspelled most of it, not used capitalization or grammar, and of course done the whole thing for the lolz of receiving attention as people chimed in with "yeah, fuck that weirdo loser."
Just because someone is out in public doesn't give others the right to turn their presence into part of their Influencer Dreams of Living Live Online!
It's even richer, sadder to be honest, when you often come to find out these same people who'll insist that being in public means you're fair game for anyone who points a camera at you, that these same people will jump on the Rage Bandwagon when it's something like a parent Influencer recording their kids.
These folks will be like "the kids didn't consent" and "those parents are using their children." But then turn around and go "oh my God look at how fat this guy is" or "this girl in the cosmetics section is beyond hope and wasting her time" while they fumble their fingers across the screen to get it posted so they can receive the dopamine hit of others weighing in on that contribution to online culture.
The internet magnifies everything. Especially assholes. Used to be, you'd make an ass of yourself in semi-private. A closer, smaller circle of friends might remember the story and tell it sometimes over cards in the den. A few passersby might snicker momentarily, but then they'd move on even if they did relate the tale that night at dinner.
The memories would fade.
Yet here we are, with a world shaping itself for everything everywhere all the time to be on record and online. I suppose that might be why so many people hate AI. It's horning in on their market for strange fucked up shit they want to score Internet Points with. How much fun will it be ripping on the follies of strangers when anyone with three minutes and access to an Image Engine can turn out much weirder stuff?
So they want AI burned, but they'll try to rally the Bandwagon Hordes against you if you dare to question why they live their lives glued to the screen as they record and post everything, no matter how inane or none of their business it might be. All that matters is they got it into the cloud. No idea what happened, but hang on, they'll pull it up if you give them a minute.
This is an article that tends to reinforce my biases, so I'm always leery of my knee jerk reaction. I do tend to agree, anecdotally, that I can experience a moment, or I can video the moment, but...
This is an article that tends to reinforce my biases, so I'm always leery of my knee jerk reaction. I do tend to agree, anecdotally, that I can experience a moment, or I can video the moment, but not necessarily both well at the same time. There are a few exceptions. Long running video capture of a kids birthday party where you don't have to focus much on the camera, stopping to take a few pictures of a plant I don't recognize on a hike, etc. Generally balancing the benefits of living the moment vs capturing the moment. I would say that building an album of memories with family has been worth it for me, but in moderation.
I do want to touch on the topic the article raises about exploiting kids through social media. I think there is tremendous harm being done to children in a variety of ways, by their parents, by social media companies, and it is allowed to happen through the complacency of society and our legislators. Here is one, extreme example of that:
Elissa has been running her daughter’s Instagram account since 2020, when the girl was 11 and too young to have her own. Photos show a bright, bubbly girl modeling evening dresses, high-end workout gear and dance leotards. She has more than 100,000 followers, some so enthusiastic about her posts that they pay $9.99 a month for more photos.
But what often starts as a parent’s effort to jump-start a child’s modeling career, or win favors from clothing brands, can quickly descend into a dark underworld dominated by adult men, many of whom openly admit on other platforms to being sexually attracted to children, an investigation by The New York Times found.
It gets worse from there. But it highlights one way in which children are being openly exploited through social media for their parents benefit. One example on the article talks about Instagram limiting the number of blocks a mom can do per day to block pedophiles from following her daughters account, so even parents not trying to exploit their kids are hamstrung by the tech companies.
How adults choose to live their life is one thing, but I think society needs to rethink how we allow photos of minors to be used on social media.
For my part, I never post family pictures online, but share private galleries with family through OneDrive and Dropbox.
I've given up on using my phone to capture things like concerts, fireworks shows, disney parades, etc. There is nothing I can film that someone hasn't done a better job than I have on and I just...
I've given up on using my phone to capture things like concerts, fireworks shows, disney parades, etc. There is nothing I can film that someone hasn't done a better job than I have on and I just want to watch the show and enjoy it. I learned a few years ago, just before COVID, that sitting and enjoying the concert is more important than any picture or video I could share would be, and if I really wanted to go back and view something, it is already more than likely documented and on YT.
I also learned that it's more important to take the picture with you/your loved ones in it, than of the view, for the same reasons. I think I read an article/essay about this and it really stuck with me at the time, and I've een trying to follow that since.
I don't judge anyone else for doing what they want in that regard, but for me, it's important to do things the way I do them because I have the memory of a gnat.
I'm gonna come in with a 'Yes, but' - I agree that it's important to enjoy the moment and take photos/videos in moderation. But I have a terrible visual recollection of things. I remember events...
I'm gonna come in with a 'Yes, but' - I agree that it's important to enjoy the moment and take photos/videos in moderation. But I have a terrible visual recollection of things. I remember events in vague shapes and feelings, and having a photo to look at really helps me pull it all together.
Then again, I also print out the photos I take as polaroids and stickers, so they're not just languishing on my phone. But I'm not gonna begrudge anyone taking pics and videos if they want to.
As I spend more time alive I've gained some appreciation for piecing together half-lost memories with old friends. It's kind of interesting to have a fuzzy fraction of a story in your head and...
As I spend more time alive I've gained some appreciation for piecing together half-lost memories with old friends. It's kind of interesting to have a fuzzy fraction of a story in your head and building a clear picture through a back-and-forth with someone else who was there.
That said, I also think there are some memories that I should have documented more diligently. I can't apply this kind of forensic brainstorming around memories of things I've experienced alone or that weren't as significant to others. If anyone feels like in-the-moment photography detracts from your experience in some way, I recommend a few things:
Before/after pictures. Anchor the memory to a picture of something relatively mundane that happened around it. For example, take a photo while standing in line for a concert, or while you're wet after a splashy water ride.
Write a diary. This can be done some time after the exciting events and has the benefit that the record can have an emotional tint that a photo doesn't always as easily capture. Emotions are otherwise really easy to misremember due to nostalgia, in my experience. For example, I dared a lot in my 20s that I now easily look back at, knowing that I succeeded, as though it was am altogether good time for me. After more careful consideration, in reality, it was in many ways a stressful and sad time; I didn't yet have the confidence of success you only gain after the fact.
Reminisce often. This can kind of has the opposite effect of a diary compared to a photo. The memory becomes a fungible thing experienced for what it is in itself, not so much as a record of something that really happened as imagined. It doesn't have to be realistic; the purpose then is to maintain a sense of having come from some place, not so much what exactly that place is.
Rather than try to respond to similar points in a couple of comments, I'll make a top-level response of my own. Back in college, I was that guy who compulsively photographed everything. What got...
Rather than try to respond to similar points in a couple of comments, I'll make a top-level response of my own.
Back in college, I was that guy who compulsively photographed everything. What got me to stop was eventually realizing that my photo dumps on Facebook got approximately zero traction. That and I graduated. Suddenly, I had a lot fewer human subjects to photograph.
Speaking of humans, I agree with the people who say it's best to take candid shots. Especially when reviewing my parents photos from my childhood (which ended up in my iCloud), the pictures where they wanted to showcase people are awkward and bland. Only my dad and, before she turned 10, my youngest sister reliably looked like they enjoyed posing for the camera. I'd get pissed on family vacations when my parents would insist on ruining a great shot of a tree tunnel by insisting we all shove our faces into it. Candid photos by a sneaky photographer are the good ones. Capture all the action shots you can.
While I agree with the facts that someone else will always take a better object or event photo than you will, the reason I take museum photos is so I can recall what specifically caught my eye. Rather than just sneakily photograph the art, I try to also get the placard with the artist's name. It's for utility, not for posting.
Finally, iPhoto's recent improvements have been a godsend for a digital hoarder like me. The way Siri automagically collates old photos into memories resurfaces events I've long since forgotten. Also, searching by text or (sometimes, depending on how the AI feels that day) subject brings up all kinds of pleasantly unexpected results.
There's something to be said about exploiting others for social media (eg, children who can't consent to being filmed or don't understand that parents are incentivizing them to act a certain way for likes).
But I've always been averse to the kind of gatekeeping that is implied with "stop filming and enjoy the moment." Who makes you the authority for how people enjoy their moments? The "you" not being OP directly, but aimed at people who dictate that someone filming an event or moment means they're not enjoying it properly.
If someone wants to take issue with using minors (or adults who haven't agreed to be posted on social media) for personal gain, it's a logical point to argue that has merits grounded in how we understand consent, notwithstanding laws about filming on public property.
But criticizing someone because they don't "enjoy the moment" in the same way that you think they should is just hollow. It's the same "technology is ruining the new generation!" drum that's been beaten since the printing press, probably before that as well. They don't come from a well-meaning place nor do they generate constructive discussion.
This is just another reframing of same old argument: "this damn generation is ruining everything! People sure were better back in my day!"
I unfortunately don't have time to source my argument but there's plenty of easily accessible research to be found backing up my opinion.
Arguments about gatekeeping who is allowed to criticize cell phone and social media use aside, there is tons of research out there that shows that cell phones and social media are uniquely harmful and the arguments against them are not simply a rehash of that same old argument about kids these days
recording events actually impairs our memories of those events
apps are constructed so that sharing things trigger dopamine spikes, completely unlike past generations critiques of television, radio, the printing press
smartphones and social media can be addictive in the clinical sense because of their inherent design
smartphone and social media can lead to psychiatric disorders of various types
and not backed up by science but I think easily discussed:
standing in an audience watching something like a concert or fireworks show when all you can see is everyone's phone screens and not much of the actual event can objectively ruin it for people trying to live in the moment and not hold a several inches large screen above their head
more than 90% of people really do not care about your video of fireworks or concerts, so it brings up the question of why do people even do this? Likes do trigger dopamine hits...
it always baffles me when people take photos of art in museums or things like fire works or live performances. There is almost undoubtedly a much better quality version of what you captured that can easily be googled. What's wrong with advocating that people just take a break from their phones and live in the real world for a bit
At the end of the day it comes down to moderation. A quick clip or photo for posterity is certainly okay. I always allow myself to take something like a 30-second video clip of a concert before I commit to putting my phone away. But too many people these days do not have moderate connections to the device in their pocket that objectively is harming large swaths of society mentally, socially, politically, etc.
I personally believe there is a lot of constructive discussion to be had where smart phones and living in the moment is concerned
I think you make some strong points and I totally agree with the scientific aspects, although you have overextended your points on some of the discussion topics in my opinion
To your first point, it's mostly been my experience that the people who are most distracted at public events are the ones who are hyper focused and upset that people are on their phones. It's like, instead of just enjoying the moment, you are spending it judging how everyone else is experiencing it. My wife, for instance, has a terrible memory and recording things she attends is how she remembers them years later.
I don't know what hyper focused means in this context, but I was distracted and mildly irritated when I watched an Alessandro Cortini show with projections in an otherwise dark room and the guy sitting in front of me regularly pulled out his phone, held it over his head with the screen facing me with full brightness as he took pictures or video clips of the show.
I didn't give the slightest damn how his experience was; for all I care he could be closing his eyes and holding his ears while recording it, so long as he did it discreetly. My irritation concerned the disturbance it caused me.
Not that I indicated in my last comment, but internally I distinguish between someone obviously obstructing and/or interfering with my experience and someone just experiencing something differently in proximity to me. That's an important distinction. So hyper focus is the people who can't just enjoy anything if someone else is "Doing it wrong."
There are actually some fantastic studies out there on the exact experience being described by the author. For example, in a study titled "media usage diminishes memory for experiences", the researchers found that the very act of recording an experience seems to prevent people from 'fully experiencing' the moment - when tested in a variety of ways about the experience individuals who recorded it for their own use or for sharing all tested lower on scores of memory than people who directly experienced the event and were instructed not to record it. Of note, the times at which memory was tested were both immediately after and only one week post, and the responses might vary if they were to collect/test memory again at a later point in time, notably because those who record it could then review/relive the experience in a more robust way than purely through their own memories, but I would caution against jumping to any conclusions.
I think it's perfectly reasonable to take small snippets or recordings of an experience as a means to both ensure that you are staying in the moment as much as possible but also to aid as a trigger for those memories if you wish to relive them in the future in a more concrete way than just remembering.
I strongly agree here. I really regret not having my life before like digital cameras documented at all except a few old photos. Those memories without pictures fade with time while the photos reinforce moments in my memory when I see them. Sure, major moments you remember, but I also want to remember slices ofy life that aren't strong enough to never forget.
I have learned not to take pictures of things, other people will take better photos of those things. I take pictures of the people in my life enjoying something, nobody else is going to capture that for me at all if I don't do it, so I do.
Completely with you on this. I don’t regret for a second having recorded or taken photos of experiences I’ve had, as it means I and interested friends and family can look back on those moments so much better. Many of them would be forgotten entirely otherwise.
This goes double for photos and videos taken by my best friend. He passed away years ago, and those files are incredibly important to me now. I can hear his voice and see his face again where I otherwise never could.
It frustrates me so much to see articles like this. People assuming I can’t enjoy something and record it at the same time. People who have decided that, because they don’t value the recording, that it has no value at all (or is even harming me somehow—what??). It’s so much pointless judging, all because they don’t understand.
Freya India's essay posits that people have forgotten how to live in the moment and trade actually experiencing for documenting via their phones. Whether a fireworks show in Paris or a packed concert, it is sure to be ubiquitously filled with people standing there watching everything happen through their camera lens. The new existential question seems to be, "If it isn't on social media, did it even happen?" while the true question should be more akin to, "If you aren't giving something your actual authentic attention, were you even there?"
I like to snap a quick photo of someone's reaction and go back to enjoying the event. A shot of a kid's awe struck face is infinitely better than twenty minutes of video of fireworks going off.
Then again, I only shoot for family who can't be there and rarely, and I mean years in between posts, post anything on social media.
Of course, even that doesn't stop me from watching too much for reactions and getting caught up.
I sometimes feel that the moments not captured on film tend to be even more special.
Cameras cannot capture what it's like to be somewhere, no matter how good they are or how skilled the photographer is. Seeing something in real life, with all the nuance and context that goes along with that is infinitly richer than looking at a photo or video of something.
I've noticed that when something incredible or interesting or funny happens, and I tell the story of my experience of it to my friends and family, they're much more engaged and feel much closer to what I felt being there versus if I had taken a photo or video of it, which would inevitably lead to me saying "oh actually I have picture of it", showing it, then them going "oh cool".
Even me looking at that photo can sometimes diminish the memory of the event itself. Positive memories aren't so much about the visual aspect of the experience, but rather how the experience made you feel, and a camera can never capture that.
My problem with this is when you get caught in an infinite scroll of all your photos looking for the specific event you’re talking about.
It’s an awkward pause as I’m now distracted, frantically going through a variety of photos (my girlfriend will stop at a few random photos along the way and make pit stop in conversation…sometimes losing the original search in the process), and I usually fumble trying to keep the conversation flowing to fill the void.
Sometimes I eventually find the perfect pic to showcase what I was describing, but many times I give up the search and tell the other person “I’ll have to show you later.” There is no later, and I think the story would have been better suited to just have maintained eye contact and relied on my description before getting hopes up.
It’s this image search, eyes glued to my phone while talking to someone in real life that also seems to pull you out of the moment. Doesn’t even have to be a photo I’ve taken, sometimes it’s a google search that I just can’t find the right query terms to relocate a specific meme. It’s frustrating, but it makes me wonder if there will soon be AI assistants to perform this tedious task and free my attention to continue engaging in meat space.
My view is that sometimes you don't even need to do the search. Even if the search was always accessible to you within a second, a lot of the time it's just better to tell the story, describe what you felt like being there, and leave it at that. If you describe it well, people's imaginations will do a much better job of emulating the feelings you felt than if you showed a perfectly framed photo.
Smartphones and social media have done things to humanity, to our societies, that I doubt anyone expected. We thought connecting the world would bring us closer together; instead it just accelerates the divisions. And some thought having a highly capable multimedia recording communications device in everyone's pocket would accelerate the Information Age.
Well, that part it did. Because people are so determined to record they forget everything else. And a lot of folks, as the article mentions, have crafted their entire identities around recording. You see it sometimes in discussion threads, where people demand pics or it didn't happen. People can't tell their friends and family what happened, they have to bring everything to a halt just for a picture or video.
Then they'll bring it all down to zero momentum again with "hold on I took a pic ... wait .... almost ... where did I put it .... hmmm ... seriously I took a pic" while they ignore everyone and scroll frantically through their mountain of "memories."
Look, people are obviously going to live their lives however they want. We have going on two generations now that feel their lives are best lived online. With everyone else planted firmly in their hip pocket. What's the first thing that happens these days, when "Something Happens?" Everyone whips a phone out, starts recording (vertically, of course, because why wouldn't they record in the wrong ratio?)
Sometimes that's a good thing, and sometimes it's for a good reason. But a lot of the time, they're recording just out of habit. Or worse, because they hope "it'll go viral." Which is one of the big issues, one of the big problems.
Everyone wants fame. Mostly because most people think fame connects to wealth (or power), and they want that. So if Something Happens, they feel they can cash in if only they get their phone out and record. Now if we're talking news, sure, there's a valid case to be made. A bunch of shit with government, for example, is starting to maybe kinda slowly start moving toward change thanks to everyone whipping out and tapping record.
But people do it for inane shit. They do it to make fun of people. They do it to try to capitalize on eccentricity. They do it just because something strange was passing by.
This, from the same generation that insists consent is king. Yet if someone's weird or strange according to their definition, and they're out and about, that's consent enough to film and post them for all eternity.
I get, and even agree on the technical definition, that being in public means you have no privacy. But those arguments start to turn churlish, childish, and selfish, when the people screeching in favor of them are recording someone who just happened to dress odd, or talk strange, or something else like that.
Not someone who Did Something, especially when it wasn't anything illegal or aggressive; just someone who had the nerve to have one of those moments we all have from time to time, or who didn't care to perfectly coif before heading out the door. Someone who just didn't fit in.
I was at a concert in 2022. After the vaccines were out. It was an outdoors stadium show, but I wore my mask. I was just about the only person who did. After the first band was done, a guy in a seat next to me wanted to take a snap with me. And got angry when I declined to pose with him.
I knew what he wanted; he was going to post our selfie and caption something like "Look at this idiot who wore a mask to a concert. Didn't he get the memo? COVID's over!" Except he probably would have misspelled most of it, not used capitalization or grammar, and of course done the whole thing for the lolz of receiving attention as people chimed in with "yeah, fuck that weirdo loser."
Just because someone is out in public doesn't give others the right to turn their presence into part of their Influencer Dreams of Living Live Online!
It's even richer, sadder to be honest, when you often come to find out these same people who'll insist that being in public means you're fair game for anyone who points a camera at you, that these same people will jump on the Rage Bandwagon when it's something like a parent Influencer recording their kids.
These folks will be like "the kids didn't consent" and "those parents are using their children." But then turn around and go "oh my God look at how fat this guy is" or "this girl in the cosmetics section is beyond hope and wasting her time" while they fumble their fingers across the screen to get it posted so they can receive the dopamine hit of others weighing in on that contribution to online culture.
The internet magnifies everything. Especially assholes. Used to be, you'd make an ass of yourself in semi-private. A closer, smaller circle of friends might remember the story and tell it sometimes over cards in the den. A few passersby might snicker momentarily, but then they'd move on even if they did relate the tale that night at dinner.
The memories would fade.
Yet here we are, with a world shaping itself for everything everywhere all the time to be on record and online. I suppose that might be why so many people hate AI. It's horning in on their market for strange fucked up shit they want to score Internet Points with. How much fun will it be ripping on the follies of strangers when anyone with three minutes and access to an Image Engine can turn out much weirder stuff?
So they want AI burned, but they'll try to rally the Bandwagon Hordes against you if you dare to question why they live their lives glued to the screen as they record and post everything, no matter how inane or none of their business it might be. All that matters is they got it into the cloud. No idea what happened, but hang on, they'll pull it up if you give them a minute.
This is an article that tends to reinforce my biases, so I'm always leery of my knee jerk reaction. I do tend to agree, anecdotally, that I can experience a moment, or I can video the moment, but not necessarily both well at the same time. There are a few exceptions. Long running video capture of a kids birthday party where you don't have to focus much on the camera, stopping to take a few pictures of a plant I don't recognize on a hike, etc. Generally balancing the benefits of living the moment vs capturing the moment. I would say that building an album of memories with family has been worth it for me, but in moderation.
I do want to touch on the topic the article raises about exploiting kids through social media. I think there is tremendous harm being done to children in a variety of ways, by their parents, by social media companies, and it is allowed to happen through the complacency of society and our legislators. Here is one, extreme example of that:
Trigger warning: child exploitation.
Gift link: A Marketplace of Girl Influencers Managed by Moms and Stalked by Men
It gets worse from there. But it highlights one way in which children are being openly exploited through social media for their parents benefit. One example on the article talks about Instagram limiting the number of blocks a mom can do per day to block pedophiles from following her daughters account, so even parents not trying to exploit their kids are hamstrung by the tech companies.
How adults choose to live their life is one thing, but I think society needs to rethink how we allow photos of minors to be used on social media.
For my part, I never post family pictures online, but share private galleries with family through OneDrive and Dropbox.
I've given up on using my phone to capture things like concerts, fireworks shows, disney parades, etc. There is nothing I can film that someone hasn't done a better job than I have on and I just want to watch the show and enjoy it. I learned a few years ago, just before COVID, that sitting and enjoying the concert is more important than any picture or video I could share would be, and if I really wanted to go back and view something, it is already more than likely documented and on YT.
I also learned that it's more important to take the picture with you/your loved ones in it, than of the view, for the same reasons. I think I read an article/essay about this and it really stuck with me at the time, and I've een trying to follow that since.
I don't judge anyone else for doing what they want in that regard, but for me, it's important to do things the way I do them because I have the memory of a gnat.
I'm gonna come in with a 'Yes, but' - I agree that it's important to enjoy the moment and take photos/videos in moderation. But I have a terrible visual recollection of things. I remember events in vague shapes and feelings, and having a photo to look at really helps me pull it all together.
Then again, I also print out the photos I take as polaroids and stickers, so they're not just languishing on my phone. But I'm not gonna begrudge anyone taking pics and videos if they want to.
As I spend more time alive I've gained some appreciation for piecing together half-lost memories with old friends. It's kind of interesting to have a fuzzy fraction of a story in your head and building a clear picture through a back-and-forth with someone else who was there.
That said, I also think there are some memories that I should have documented more diligently. I can't apply this kind of forensic brainstorming around memories of things I've experienced alone or that weren't as significant to others. If anyone feels like in-the-moment photography detracts from your experience in some way, I recommend a few things:
Rather than try to respond to similar points in a couple of comments, I'll make a top-level response of my own.
Back in college, I was that guy who compulsively photographed everything. What got me to stop was eventually realizing that my photo dumps on Facebook got approximately zero traction. That and I graduated. Suddenly, I had a lot fewer human subjects to photograph.
Speaking of humans, I agree with the people who say it's best to take candid shots. Especially when reviewing my parents photos from my childhood (which ended up in my iCloud), the pictures where they wanted to showcase people are awkward and bland. Only my dad and, before she turned 10, my youngest sister reliably looked like they enjoyed posing for the camera. I'd get pissed on family vacations when my parents would insist on ruining a great shot of a tree tunnel by insisting we all shove our faces into it. Candid photos by a sneaky photographer are the good ones. Capture all the action shots you can.
While I agree with the facts that someone else will always take a better object or event photo than you will, the reason I take museum photos is so I can recall what specifically caught my eye. Rather than just sneakily photograph the art, I try to also get the placard with the artist's name. It's for utility, not for posting.
Finally, iPhoto's recent improvements have been a godsend for a digital hoarder like me. The way Siri automagically collates old photos into memories resurfaces events I've long since forgotten. Also, searching by text or (sometimes, depending on how the AI feels that day) subject brings up all kinds of pleasantly unexpected results.